Whenever guilt crept in, he reminded himself of days like today when he felt like he was born to love her and, in turn, love Erica.
Two nights ago, he’d found out Katie struggled with guilt as well for the same reasons he did.
Tyler stepped into Erica’s bedroom, expecting to hear Katie read to her daughter while she nursed, but instead, he found her staring at a photo of Eric she kept next to the crib. Her eyes were sad and she seemed lost in thought.
Katie became aware of him when he took another step. She gave him a sad smile then looked down at her sleeping daughter. When he asked her what was wrong, she began to cry.
“I love Eric. I fell for him the night we met.” Tyler’s chest burned with jealousy, but he tried not to show it as he listened to her go on. “Our relationship was like a whirlwind. One minute we were meeting for the first time and then in a blink of an eye, it was over.” She wiped her nose with a tissue and stared down at her daughter. “I miss him especially when I look at Erica, but…” Katie stared into his eyes. “…the love I feel for you is so much more. Deeper, I guess.” She choked up and wiped at her eyes. “I didn’t even know I could feel this much love for someone. I love you, Tyler.”
Her words weaved through his heart, making him feel so much he could burst while simultaneously making him feel guilty for being so happy that she was his. If Eric were here, would Katie still be his?
She sniffed and stood to lay a sleeping Erica in her crib. Leaning over her daughter, Katie rubbed her back and whispered, “I love you.” Then turned to face him.
“I don’t want to feel guilty for loving you, Tyler.”
He didn’t either.
* * *
He wasn’t sure how long he held them, but it wasn’t nearly long enough when Erica woke, giving her warning cry that she needed to eat. Katie sat up and raised her arms over her head to stretch. She had no idea what she did to him. He had to look away and think of very unsexy things.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you. I didn’t realize how tired I was.”
“Why don’t you feed her while I make dinner?” Katie yawned as moved to the other end of the couch so he could sit up.
“If you don’t mind waiting, I’d like to help with dinner.”
“I don’t mind. I’m going to change my shirt, and I’ll be right back.”
“Change?” Then she noticed the spit up from Erica and her smeared mascara on his shirt.
“Sorry.” She wiped the dark smudges from under her eyes.
“It’s a small sacrifice to hold two lovely ladies.”
She gave him a small smile and said his three favorite words. “I love you.”
He decided to take a quick shower instead of just changing his clothes. When he returned, Katie was readjusting her shirt while patting Erica on the back, getting her to burp.
Katie followed him into the kitchen, placed Erica in her swing then wrapped her arms around him from behind. “I’m starving, what should we make?” she asked, nuzzling against him.
“Well, my mom left a container of frozen spaghetti sauce, and I’m pretty sure we have noodles.”
“That sounds perfect. You start on the spaghetti and I’ll make a salad.” She let go of him to rummage through the fridge to find what she needed. He plugged in his iPod and put on Katie’s Mix, which was pretty much all 80’s music. She began to sing along while they prepared dinner side by side.
“How was your day with Erica?”
“Besides not liking the bottle, which we already knew, it was great. How could it not be when she has a super awesome babysitter?”
Katie chuckled and threw lettuce at him. “Are you trying to start a food fight with me, Miss Katie?”
Her eyes widened as she said, “No,” a little too loud, startling Erica. She moved to get her, but he got to Erica first and pulled her out of the swing. It took less than ten seconds for her to calm down when he placed her against his chest.
Katie’s head tilted to the side, a small smile gracing her lips. “She likes you.”
“I don’t mean to brag, but the ladies loooooove me,” he said while trying to hold a cocky grin.
Katie shook her head and bit back a smile. “You are pretty irresistible.”
Tyler winked at her and bounced a little bit while he sang along to the radio. His singing voice was terrible, but Erica didn’t seem to mind. When an old Guns n Roses song came on, he held up one hand as a microphone and got into it.
Katie was practically in tears from laughing so hard. He put an arm around her, forcing her to dance along to his singing. She was laughing when she went on her tippy toes and kissed him. “I love you.”
After dinner, he took Erica upstairs to prepare her for bed while Katie cleaned up dinner. He sat in a rocking chair with a freshly bathed baby cradled in his arm and read The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein, his favorite book. Half way through he heard Katie enter the room. She leaned against the wall and listen to him read.
Once he read the last line, he quietly closed the book and set it on the floor. “I love that book,” Katie whispered. She knelt down in front of them and caressed Erica’s face then looked into his eyes. “You’re our giving tree.” She reached for his hand and held tight. “Knock me in the head with your branch if I ever take you for granted. You mean too much to me to ever risk losing you.”
His smile grew, and she leaned over Erica to give him a sweet kiss. She had no idea how much she gave him, by being who she was. Every sweet word, every kind gesture, and the way she looked at him with love in her eyes filled him to the point of overflowing. She was his giving tree.
“It’s a deal.”
Chapter Thirty-Five
June 2016
Katie
Once again, Katie stood in front of her full-length mirror. This time wearing a new bra and panty set Alexis helped pick out. Her eyes went directly to all the places she wished she could hide. A bead of sweat ran between her breasts leaving a damp spot on her sexy red bra and her racing heart made tiny waves with her generous cleavage.
Alexis swore she looked incredible and reminded her Tyler would be too busy getting her out of her clothes to care about any extra flesh.
In her heart, Katie knew Tyler loved her no matter how many stomach rolls she had or if her butt wasn’t as firm as it used to be. But it didn’t keep her from wanting him to see her as a sexy, desirable woman.
She heard Tyler talking sweetly to Erica through the baby monitor as he packed a bag for her overnight stay with Alexis.
Her stomach churned, and it became difficult to take deep breaths. She sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over, attempting to control her breathing. Thinking about being away from her daughter overnight didn’t help matters. As much as she and Tyler needed this time together, she wasn’t sure she was ready for an overnight.
Katie focused on Tyler’s calming voice, and slowly her breathing returned to normal, and a sense of calm slid over her like a warm blanket. Erica would be safe with Alexis and Bubba, and Katie would finally get to spend the evening alone with her man. “Everything is going to be okay,” Katie reassured herself.
She pushed off the bed and pulled her new dress out of the closet. It took trying on nearly twenty dresses before she found the perfect one for tonight. When she stood in front of the mirror in the small boutique, she felt pretty for the first time since she found out she was pregnant.
The dressed flowed smoothly over her breasts and stomach, emphasizing her cleavage but didn’t cling to her extra fluff around her middle. It ended mid-thigh, allowing her to show off the best part of her body. After buckling her strappy heels, she stood and turned around in front of the mirror, regaining some of that confidence she lost. Her breasts and legs looked fantastic.
When she stepped into the hall, she came face to face with the man of her dreams. In one hand, he held Erica in her infant car seat and the other her diaper bag.
A man had never looked so sexy.
Her st
omach dropped, and her pulse quickened. She had not been prepared to see him in a suit. She thought he was hot when she saw him in his flight suit with his face clean-shaven and his hair slightly mussed. Then again she thought the same thing when he wore shorts and an old t-shirt with a few days of scruff on his face. But him in a suit… He was off the charts sexy. He had a slight five o’clock shadow, but his hair was perfectly styled and wow… No words.
She watched as his eyes made a slow heated trail from the top of her head to her toes. A low vibrating groan came out of his mouth as he bit his lower lip. Her stomach did a little somersault, feeling a strange satisfaction.
He gently set Erica down, dropped the diaper bag, and before Katie could even blink, he had her in his arms, clutching her so tight she could feel his heartbeat against her chest. With a thick voice, he managed to say, “Katie…” before his lips were on hers. With one hand on the center of her back, he held her against him. His other hand slowly slid down her back, over her ass, until he reached the edge of her dress, then it slowly slid up under her skirt.
Her stomach fluttered, and her breath came out in uneven gasps when his mouth left her lips, and he kissed his way down her neck. Her body was warm all over, and she wanted so much more.
Just as his fingers reached the apex of her thighs, Erica made just the slightest noise, jerking them out of their haze. Tyler sighed against her neck and slid his hand from beneath her skirt, causing her to whimper. “I don’t think I told you, but you look amazing, and God, I want you,” he groaned.
She leaned her head against his chest and sighed. There was a war inside her head. One side was her fear of being away from her daughter for the evening and the other was Tyler. Just Tyler, and he was winning.
“You ready for our date?” he asked.
“I’m ready,” she said breathlessly. His mouth lifted into a shy smile that she desperately wanted to kiss again.
The drive to Alexis’s condo felt like it took forever, especially with the sexual tension lingering between them. It didn’t help that Tyler kept running his hand up and down her thigh. Each time his hand reached the edge of her skirt, her stomach clenched and her pulse quickened, making her wish they were alone.
Stan, Alexis’s new roommate, opened the door and ushered them into the condo with a “nice” as his brows raised. Not a moment later, Alexis walked out of her office wearing a t-shirt that read, Talk nerdy to me.
“Wow. Look at you two.” She gave them a low whistle. Tyler took Katie’s hand and had her twirl around for them. “Look at her.” He beamed, and when their eyes met, he mouthed, “My girl.”
She reached up with one hand and caressed his cheek before giving him a kiss that hinted of what she wanted to do tonight.
“Uh, guys! Not in front of the baby.” Alexis teased. “Speaking of…” She rubbed her hands together before excitedly taking Erica out of her car seat, lifting her up and planting kisses all over her face. Using a soft, high-pitched voice, she said, “Did you come to see your Auntie Alexis? Are we going to have a good time?”
Bubba, who couldn’t be left alone, especially since they were taking his girl, stood next to Alexis, patiently waiting for her to spread some attention his way.
Tyler handed her a piece of paper with Erica’s schedule and directions for feeding her. “You have our numbers. The number for the pediatrician is on there so is the address where we’ll be staying. Call if you have any questions or need anything.”
“No worries, guys.” She lifted Erica up again and between kisses said, “I’ll see you guys in a few hours.”
Tyler stiffened. “I thought you said you’d watch her overnight.” His voice cracked. Katie noticed the slight tinge of panic.
“I did, and I would love to.” Alexis smirked. “But I’ll see you in a few hours.” Katie bit back a smile before hugging Alexis and thanking her for babysitting. Alexis understood her apprehension about leaving Erica overnight and found it humorous instead of insulting. “You know I’m right.” She lifted her brow. “Right?” She looked over at Tyler, who was shaking his head and pointing his finger at her.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, emphasizing you.
“Okay. Wink wink.” Alexis muttered under her breath. “We both know Katie isn’t going to be able to stay away.”
Once Alexis shut the door behind them, Tyler took Katie’s hand. “You ready, sweetheart?”
“Yeah,” she said, trying to sound convincing, but she could feel her chest tightening. Every step away from the apartment became excruciating.
Tyler sensed her unease and stopped and faced her. “Are you okay leaving Erica with Alexis all night?”
She said, “Yes.” But her head shook no. “I want to. I want to have you all to myself. It’s just hard to be away from her.” The last thing Katie wanted to do was make him feel guilty for wanting time alone with her but… “She’s my heart.”
Tyler looked back and forth between her and the closed front door. He placed a hand on her chin and lifted it, so she was looking him in the eyes. “We can bring her with us if…”
“No,” she said so quickly it brought a smile to his face. “I want this. I’ve been waiting for this day. It’ll be difficult to be away from her, but we need this.” Her voice softened as she stared into his kind eyes.
He wrapped her in his arms and kissed her forehead. “At any time tonight, just say the word and we’ll pick her up.” His thoughtfulness loosened the tight grip anxiety had around her heart.
“Thank you,” she said while taking a relieved breath. She could actually feel all the built up tension leave her body. Katie really had no intention of picking Erica up early, but just knowing she could made her feel better.
Once they were back on the road, his hand returned to her thigh. This time she covered it with her own to keep it from wandering. She wanted her head clear.
“Are you going to tell me where we’re going?” Tyler had kept their plans a secret, which made her crazy. She learned early on that she couldn’t kiss the secret out of him, but it didn’t stop Katie from trying. The only hints he gave were:
1. She needed to dress up tonight;
2. Pack an overnight bag.
Done and done.
“Nope. It’s a surprise.”
“It has to be since all the best restaurants are that way, and I don’t know of any hotels this way.”
“Who says we’re going to a restaurant or staying at a hotel?” he asked with a mischievous grin.
“Then why did you ask me to bring an overnight bag?”
“Because you’ll need it. We just won’t be staying at a hotel.” She looked around and realized they were driving through a family friendly neighborhood. Several of the homes had basketball hoops in the driveway and bikes parked in the yard. Katie smiled, thinking how one day she’d like to buy a home for her and Erica in a neighborhood like this.
She was about to question him again when he said, “We’re here.” She looked out the window and stared at the ranch style home. It was charming and in obvious need of some work, but she could see its potential.
“Here?” she asked, pointing to the house.
“Yes.” The confidence he had earlier seemed to waver as he watched her reaction.
“Whose house is this?”
“You’ll see.” When he stepped out of the car, she noticed how his shoulders looked stiff and his hands were clenched. She wasn’t sure what was going on, and it worried her that he was so anxious.
He helped her out of the car with a tight smile and a crease in his forehead.
She thought back over the past five minutes, wondering if she said or did something to upset him, but she couldn’t think of anything.
“You okay?” His eyes softened and he kissed her cheek, but his body was still stiff.
He said, “Yes.” But it didn’t sound convincing.
Katie didn’t believe him and wondered if he was just as anxious about being alone with her as she was with him.
>
He placed his hand on the curve of her lower back and led them to the front porch. She couldn’t begin to imagine why they were at someone else’s house. He never mentioned having dinner with anyone else. Then he pulled a key out of his pocket, unlocked the door, and waved her in.
She placed a hand on his side, feeling the tension, and gave him a quick kiss before stepping inside. He walked in right behind her and leaned around her to flip on the lights.
The first thing she noticed was the empty living room and the floor to ceiling windows. When she looked at Tyler, she realized he was watching her with beads of sweat running down his face.
Before she could ask him again if he was all right, he took her hand and guided her into a large kitchen. It was dated, but the appliances looked like they were in good condition and it had plenty of counter space. She immediately pictured herself making dinner here and, one day, teaching Erica how to cook.
Tyler’s voice wavered slightly as he pointed out features in each room. She couldn’t help wonder why they were walking around an empty house but instead of asking she let him guide her from room to room.
In her head, she imagined what she would do in each room if it were her house. She didn’t share her ideas; she was more concerned with Tyler’s sweaty palms and the way his hand shook in hers.
They walked down a hallway, passing two large bedrooms and a bathroom until they reached a room with double doors. Tyler pushed them both open, and she lost her breath for a moment. In the center of the master suite was a beautiful bed surrounded by lit candles. A picnic basket sat on the corner of the bed and a bottle of wine chilled in a bucket on the floor. She covered her mouth and tried to keep the tears from falling. It was the most romantic thing anyone had ever done for her.
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