And I know you want it,” Av continues, her voice back to being chockers of laughter. Gwen makes her move into the crowd. The old guy coughs again. The nurse sits next to him. Gwen shoves an empty hospus bed to the side with abandon and purpose. The accompanying nurse skitters to halt its projectile motion across the floor. The rest of the nurses are signalling each other frantically. One sprints out of the room.
“It’s easy to see,” Av sings and something in her voice changes. I know Av well enough to catch the subtle differences enough now. And be wary of them. My eyes flick from Gwen to Avalon to see that the laughter has evaporated from her song. Blue eyes flash as they latch on to something. What the fuck has caused that reaction? Maybe old Gerald is rejecting Gwen. Not a good choice after all the work we have done to fire this.
I follow their line. Kelsey is standing in front of Noah, tilting her head as she says something to him. One hand pulls at a lock of her hair and she leans toward him to say something, arching her back. He drops his head down to hear and she inches her mouth closer to his ear as she answers. They are mere inches apart. Her chest pushes against him. Is he doing that to hurt me? Did he call her over? Can his torture never just bloody end? Does he have to take absolutely everything? For fuck’s sake, he’s got Avalon. He’s got Sam. What more could he want?
“Fight the feeling.
Leave him alone,” Av’s voice could practically freeze every man’s nuts off. Is Kelsey insane or just plain blind? Why is she staying there? Has she no idea of what this is doing to me… or Avalon? She kicks one of her legs back as she smiles at him.
“Let’s keep it friendly,” the way Av is looking reminds me of the night she told me she would shoot me in the spine and let me drag myself to the road for help while she watched. Kelsey moves off and walks toward me so slowly unaware of the death levelled upon her. I could very well be mistaken but I want to say I detect a smugness in her step. Surely not. The show goes on unaware of the change in the singer, except for one face that turns and watches the scene with narrowed blue eyes the exact shade as his sister’s.
“You have to play fair,” challenge saturates her tone and it’s like she is practically saying that it will be anything but fair. I forgot how Avalon possesses the ability to change sing the words of a song but make it send a completely different message.
“See I don’t care,” Nathan shoots me a shake of his head that causes my whole body to tense. I don’t know what he’s saying. I want to glare at Noah but I’ve known for a while I can’t beat him. But what if Av got in between? Or Sam? Should I for cred sake?
“What the fuck do you think you are doing talking to him?” I growl at Kelsey as she sits primly back on her stool. “You know our history! Who the hell knows what he is thinking to talk to you? Or what Av might think? Kels, neither of them play on your level. Have you not seen that? Did you not at least watch her on TV today?” Gwen is stalking back up on stage, confidence and excitement in flooding every aspect of her. I’ve never talked like this to Kelsey and I try to rein it in, recognising that fear is the reason I’m angry.
Kelsey raises her eyes to the stage and smiles. “I watched you watch her on TV today,” she retorts smoothly. Oh, right. I get it. Kelsey is feeling insecure and trying to make me jealous. I get it. I should have been more sensitive. That’s why she would have put the extra moves on when he talks to her.
“Okay, I see how it’s goin’ down,” Avalon’s voice cuts through the air like a whip. I hope she does.
Kelsey grins at the floor biting her lip.
“Kelsey, babe,” I hold her face lightly in my hands. “Seriously, listen to me. A. You have nothing to worry about, I’m so into you it’s ridiculous. I’m sorry that you might have thought otherwise, Av is my friend. And B? Babe, you have no idea who you are antagonising. Just believe me. The restaurant was nothing.” I want to grab her and shake her. She lifts big, blue eyes to mine. I crumble. Part of my brain can’t believe I used Avalon’s A and B thingy’s in a sentence.
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just trying to be amicable and maybe just make you jealous a tiny, winy smidge,” her lips pout.
Ronald starts singing.
Sam stalks over. His face splits into a wolfish grin as he stares at Kels. “Hope you don’t like your face.” He stares at Kelsey. “Best move you’ve ever made. Good bye, honey.”
“Oh my God.” Kelsey raises her hands in supplication and a slight glance in my direction. “Please, I don’t see what all the fuss is over. I was merely asking him whether he thought Avalon would attend a party thrown by my friend. Who is massive! She wants her to come. It would be well worth Avalon’s time.” She thrusts out her phone and shows the comment begging Kelsey to invite Avalon to this chick’s party. I scrunch my eyes at the name; Killa Van Campen. It sounds vaguely familiar. “What is everyone’s problem? He doesn’t like Seth, I was trying to be civil just like you seem to be with him, Sam. This girl,” she gestures with her phone, “could make or break us all! This is Kamilla Van Campen for God’s Sake!”
My shoulders sag in relief, she talked to him to make me jealous and get cred for knowing Avalon. He wasn’t after me. “It just looked…”
“Like you were trying to garner his attentions.” Sam finishes flatly. “Unlike me.”
I let my gaze catch what is happening. Nathan is talking to Noah who shrugs and shakes his head as he talks. It’s still very strange to see him talking. Avalon’s eyes find mine before scanning the audience. She relaxes minutely after Nathan performs a flurry of hand signals in her direction.
“See I know she loves you,” her voice is back to being sweet, but she appears confused and unsure. Her hand rubs the bicep of the arm holding the mic.
“I understand, I’d probably be just as crazy about you.
If you were my own man.” She smiles and directs the first part of the line to me and my heart settles as she sings it quite cheekily, back to inferring the opposite to what the words are saying.
“Pfft. I hope you don’t believe this bullshit spraying from her fake arse lips and can see what you’re dating now, mate,” Sam grates shaking his head as he moves off. “Snake.”
“Don’t cha?”
“Don’t cha?” The words seem time appropriate.
no idea
Noah
“What was that about?” Nathan asks. “Sam doesn’t like that girl.”
I blink unsure of what he’s meaning. Gwen is moving back up on stage after getting jiggy on Gerald’s lap for most of the dance. The old guy was wearing a smile that everyone here was grinning back to. The nurses were appalled. I’ve been trying not to look since her first flash of areas I never wanted to see. No need to add to my nightmare library. Av is still singing, standing in the corner to let Gwen and Irene shine. I hadn’t noticed the change in her voice until this second. It reminded me of the time she sang to me on the beach. Challenging. Cold.
“What’s with the blonde Sam doesn’t like?” he asks and I feel something simmering beneath his skin.
I lift my hands surprised. “What? Nothing.”
“Nothing,” he repeats the word as if it speaks volumes to him.
“She stopped to ask if Av and I would go to a party, the girl is influential and would probably pay for Avalon to be there to help out even more for the farmers,” I answer evenly.
Nathan stares at me and I stare back, annoyance starting to creep into my being. I can’t understand what he’s trying to figure out. The rage from the messages seems to condense as he waits in front of me, my fists curl, then he just laughs. “I should ring Dell!” he cackles after another few seconds. “Teenager stuff!”
I’m confused. I turn to watch Seth, he talking lowly to the girl but she smiles at me again anyway.
When she had halted in front of me, I decided to test myself. Hell, it’s Seth’s girlfriend, so who better to try it on. If it went wrong, it went wrong. In hindsight, I guess it was shitty because I realised that all my musings
their way had probably given her the wrong idea. Totally wrong idea. I had been trying to sort myself out about how I felt about everything Jarrod had said and my thoughts on women in general. It was a chance to discern whether I was as Jarrod proposed, attracted to Av because she was beautiful… well there was a chance to debunk that theory standing right in front of me. I had kept looking at Kelsey because she obviously was lovely too but… I felt nothing toward her, no matter what scenario I placed us in. So, I was able to rule Jarrod’s second theory out as well.
When she came over, I decided to see if I could treat her like D or the other girls, even though her body language was unlike those girls. I thought I did well. I kept my breath even and answered her politely. I was stoked I was on the road to pushing this social awkwardness behind me and fine, it helped that it had the added benefit of annoying Seth. I was sure that was better than murdering him right here and now. There is nothing I would like better than to feel my pain rushing through my fists to create his pain.
I felt like I just took the first small step towards being normal. If I could get through a girl near me for a few seconds (one that was putting out the signs but not touching me) with a semblance of normality, then there was a massive chance I could go on improving and Av and I could last with the goal of me accepting affection with no problem. I could picture it now and let my gaze find her on the stage.
Av, however, is not exuding any vibes that could be misconstrued as even remotely affectionate and does not return my smile. She watches Nathan and I can see their secret language in a flurry of his hand movements.
He eyes me derisively, a peculiar smile tugging at his lips, like he literally has no control over them.
Okay? Tonight is weird. I flex and stretch my neck either side.
“She’s a snake. She’s so up to something, man,” Sam states malevolently as he finds his place next to me on the wall. He focuses on the stage and groans. “You have no idea until you’re sinking deep in her plan for her to step herself up on your shoulders with her poison stilettos. Beware.”
“I’m not sure what I was supposed to do,” I sigh.
Sam glances at me his face pale as a sheet, “Well, while we all wish you pegged her out the bloody door, I mean … seriously? She has a boyfriend and she’s over here shoving her glittery tits in your face pretty much in front of him and your girlfriend. Bitch!”
I rub my hands over my face. “Av saw.”
Sam chuckles, “I’m sure that is who her show was for. Kelsey likes to be the Queen Bee, always has in my opinion. But good. Cow will be skinless by tomorrow morning.”
I shake my head, “I’m the one that …” I trail off, Sam doesn’t know anything about my father’s words on trusting females and their secret ambitions to wreak havoc and lives.
He looks up at me, “That what? Has the past of a million girls?”
I take a deep breath. Maybe I need a guy to talk to, but it didn’t work out so well with Jarrod. I hesitate. Past of a million girls? No one really knows me. Av walks off the stage amongst the wild applause without one look in my direction. Her body is stiff.
Nathan disappears as two elderly ladies shuffle out on the stage. We are both silent as we watch them set up the microphone and begin to sing. The tune hits me in the stomach like a punch, throwing me back to being whirled around on the grass in the park as my mother spun me to the low hum of the radio. Her ribbons and hair flowing out behind her as she sung the happy lyrics. In hindsight, it must have been when she was in the full throes of the affair; a couple of weeks before she dropped the pregnancy news. Her happiness was beaming in her smile. My head throbs. I wish the song would finish. I wish today was over. I need to go.
Sam is watching me, eyes narrowed. “Honestly, I’m just wishing she smashes her like those girls from your side. I doubt Av gives a crap about stuff like that petty show.”
“I’m a dick,” I exhale, grateful that the song has finished. I need to reconstruct my walls before they totally crumble and let everything flood in. And that is the problem I decide, everything is trying to cram in through the crack Av has created.
“Just checking you weren’t thinking with it?” he grins. Something in my face says otherwise. “You’re a naive arsehole, there’s a difference,” he nudges me in the side as Av walks back on to stage and announces that there will be a slight intermission with amazing snacks created by Gene Joan and Dana. Finally, she looks my way and her azure eyes freeze mine.
There is something there in the depths, something new. I feel it in my bones that Avalon is in motion.
“Um, I would like to revise my previous statement, your honour. I think she might give a damn,” Sam blows out.
AUTHOR NOTE
Ahh… still waiting for Russell Crowe’s call. I know it will come, I’ve been practicing what it will be like; Russell’s ears will bleed but that is a small and fixable problem. Although, I’ve conceded that Netflix would be an acceptable alternative! I wonder if everyone that loves Avalon could write to them and beg!
So, I ended this book there, in yup, that awkward place as I honestly felt like I would never get it out there otherwise in this year of strangeness. I’ve haven’t had much time at all to write but am hoping that now that this book is finished, I will get back into the swing of the things during holidays with the weight of trying to finish it off my shoulders.
I miss writing so much.
So here's to all the inpiration coming my way and Avalon taking over my life, because I know that she has crazy times ahead of her!
(PEEP) INTERMISSION SHOW
Seth
I’ve calmed down, knowing that Kelsey was just trying to roll two plays into one and my face isn’t on the conveyor belt to be ripped apart. It feels satisfying to have her want to fight for my attention, to be jealous of my interest; she is smart so it proves she knows who will make it and who she should stay with. Who has a future. Me. It almost mutes the fear that I have developed of the arsehole. Kelsey has uncharacteristically threaded her arm through mine and leans against me now as we watch the duet before us. After Gwen’s performance this one seems way more geriatric than it should. Two old birds trying to entertain. The song, however, seems to tickle something inside my memories, but after a few seconds straining for its source I can’t place it.
Kelsey cringes against me as one strives for a high note but fails miserably, voice cracking. I frown, feeling like I know it from somewhere, it’s so close but their singing keeps me from recognition. She fishes out he phone from her bag and tenses again. She makes a strange kind of strangled noise deep in her throat. I try to peer at what might have caused it but she switches it off as her shoulders draw back rigidly.
I open my mouth to ask her but she speaks before me. “I can’t wait to go up the coast for your comp next weekend,” her accompanying and suggestive smile, disarming me over and over. It feels like eternity since I’ve competed, the last time was when Avalon bought these guys to cheer for me. How the world has changed since then.
“Me either,” I reply.
“Will he be there?” Kelsey nods Reed’s way without looking at him.
It’s my turn to tense, wondering why the hell she is asking. “I hope not.” I never want to see him holding another trophy again. I hope my tone conveys this to her succinctly.
“You’ll smash him,” she says knowingly, her gaze demonstrating that she understands.
“I didn’t last time,” I state acidly as the memory causes pain to bleed up my throat. It’s raw to admit. I feel my eyes begging to roll as I think of how Avalon has go me talking like a girl.
She raises her eyebrow at me, “Maybe that was the plan all along. This time you have me. I won’t let that happen again. Trust me.”
I gaze down into her lovely eyes and see strength and something else there. I don’t think it was the plan especially when I remember the argument afterward in my bedroom with the little hellcat. And Avalon doesn’t really plan those things, they just seem to r
oll out in her vicinity; I’d be a bloody skeleton of anxiety if I thought she was out there planning things.
Kels nuzzles at my neck, it’s very unlike her but I like it.
“You need to help me get her to go to Kamilla’s get together,” she says as she lifts her head to hold my gaze, like what she was saying is of utmost importance. “Believe me, get her there and he will lose everything.” The way she draws out the last word makes my heart feel like it’s been thrown in front of the perfect wave.
“I like the sound of that.” The fierceness in my answer does not surprise me in the least, Kelsey however flinches.
“Sorry, I just hate him,” I pull her closer.
“I’m just a little raw from when you were harsh with me,” she mumbles.
I feel terrible. Clapping ensues from the crowd but neither Kelsey or I bother to contribute to the duet’s non-deserved praise.
“I’ll get her there,” I rub Kels’s back, “but do we have to invite him?”
She is quiet for a while, thinking. “No.”
I breathe out a sigh of relief.
“Not if we start the game now,” she watches me from under her thick black lashes.
“Game?” I raise an eyebrow.
“Game,” she states the corner of her lip pulling up.
The quietness in the room draws my attention to the stage and in the room’s dimmed lights I can make out Av walking barefoot on to the stage, she thanks everyone for coming and announces an intermission with snacks provided by some of the old birds in the Divorce Club.
“What have you got planned?” I ask her, hoping it’s not some ploy to hurt Avalon.
Kelsey crosses her long legs and flicks a look toward Reed. While his body is all relaxed I can tell he is stressed, those walnuts are blaring it as they stand out starkly along his jawline. Good. “Who has been instrumental in him talking, being around others, winning the surf comp that day?” she raises her eyebrow.
Avalon Expandable Heart: The Wild Heart Series Page 52
