XI
There was a disturbing air which was shared by all the members ofHoddan's crew, on the way to Walden. It was not exactly reluctance,because there was self-evident enthusiasm over the idea of making apirate voyage under him. So far as past enterprises were concerned,Hoddan as a leader was the answer to a Darthian gentleman's prayer. Thepartial looting of Ghek's castle, alone, would have made him a desirableleader. But a crew of seven, returned from space, had displayed currencywhich amounted to the wealth of fabled Ind. Nobody knew what Ind was,any longer, but it was a synonym for fabulous and uncountable riches.When men went off with Hoddan, they came back rich.
But nevertheless there was an uncomfortable sort of atmosphere in therenovated yacht. They'd transshipped from the spaceboat to the yachtthrough lifeboat tubes, and they were quite docile about it because noneof them knew how to get back to ground. Hoddan left the spaceboat with atriggerable timing-signal set for use on his return. He'd done a similarthing off Krim. He drove the little yacht well out, until Darth was onlya spotted ball with visible clouds and ice caps. Then he lined up forWalden, direct, and went into overdrive.
Within hours he noted the disturbing feel of things. His followers werenot happy. They moped. They sat in corners and submerged themselves inmisery. Large, massive men with drooping blond mustaches--idealcharacters for the roles of pirates--tended to squeeze tears out oftheir eyes at odd moments. When the ship was twelve hours on its way,the atmosphere inside it was funereal. The spearmen did not even gorgethemselves on the food with which the yacht was stocked. And when aDarthian gentleman lost his appetite, something had to be wrong.
He called Thal into the control room.
"What's the matter with the gang?" he demanded vexedly. "They look at meas if I'd broken all their hearts! Do they want to go back?"
Thal heaved a sigh, indicating depression beside which suicidal maniawould be hilarity. He said pathetically:
"We cannot go back. We cannot ever return to Darth. We are lost men,doomed to wander forever among strangers, or to float as corpses betweenthe stars."
"What happened?" demanded Hoddan. "I'm taking you on a pirate cruisewhere the loot should be a lot better than last time!"
Thal wept. Hoddan astonishedly regarded his whiskery countenance,contorted with grief and dampened with tears.
"It happened at the castle," said Thal miserably. "The man Derec, fromWalden, had thrown a bomb at you. You seemed to be dead. But Don Loriswas not sure. He fretted, as he does. He wished to send someone to makesure. The Lady Fani said; 'I will make sure!' She called me to her andsaid, 'Thal, will you fight for me?' And there was Don Loris suddenlynodding beside her. So I said, 'Yes, my Lady Fani.' Then she said;'Thank you. I am troubled by Bron Hoddan.' So what could I do? She saidthe same thing to each of us, and each of us had to say that he wouldfight for her. To each she said that she was troubled by you. Then DonLoris sent us out to look at your body. And now we are disgraced!"
* * * * *
Hoddan's mouth opened and closed and opened again. He remembered thisitem of Darthian etiquette. If a girl asked a man if he would fight forher, and he agreed, then within a day and a night he had to fight theman she sent him to fight, or else he was disgraced. And disgrace onDarth meant that the shamed man could be plundered or killed by anybodywho chose to do so, but he would be hanged by indignant authority if heresisted. It was a great deal worse than outlawry. It included scorn andcontempt and opprobrium. It meant dishonor and humiliation and admitteddegradation. A disgraced man was despicable in his own eyes. And Hoddanhad kidnaped these men who'd been forced to engage themselves to fighthim, and if they killed him they would obviously die in space, and ifthey didn't they'd be ashamed to stay alive. The moral tone on Darth wasprobably not elevated, but etiquette was a force.
Hoddan thought it over. He looked up suddenly.
"Some of them," he said wryly, "probably figure there's nothing to dobut go through with it, eh?"
"Yes," said Thal dismally. "Then we will all die."
"Hm-m-m," said Hoddan. "The obligation is to fight. If you fail to killme, that's not your fault, is it? If you're conquered, you're in theclear?"
Thal said miserably:
"True. Too true! When a man is conquered he is conquered. His conquerormay plunder him, when the matter is finished, or he can spare him, whenhe may never fight his conqueror again."
"Draw your knife," said Hoddan. "Come at me."
Thal bewilderedly made the gesture. Hoddan leveled a stun-pistol andsaid:
"_Bzzz._ You're conquered. You came at me with your knife, and I shotyou with my stun-pistol. It's all over. Right?"
Thal gaped at him. Then he beamed. He expanded. He gloated. He frisked.He practically wagged a nonexistent tail in his exuberance. He'd beenshown an out when he could see none.
"Send in the others one by one," said Hoddan. "I'll take care of them.But Thal--why did the Lady Fani want me killed?"
Thal had no idea, but he did not care. Hoddan did care. He wasbewildered and inclined to be indignant. A noble friendship liketheirs-- A spearman, came in and saluted. Hoddan went through a symbolicduel, which was plainly the way the thing would have happened inreality. Others came in and went through the same process. Two of themdid not quite grasp that it was a ritual, and he had to shoot them inthe knife arm. Then he hunted in the ship's supplies for ointment forthe blisters that would appear from stun-pistol bolts at such shortrange. As he bandaged the places, he again tried to find out why theLady Fani had tried to get him carved up by the large-bladed knives allDarthian gentlemen wore. Nobody could enlighten him.
But the atmosphere improved remarkably. Since each theoretic fight hadtaken place in private, nobody was obliged to admit a compromise withetiquette. Hoddan's followers ceased to brood. They developed hugeappetites. Those who had been aground on Krim told zestfully of themonstrous hangovers they'd acquired there. It appeared that Hoddan wasrevered for the size of the benders he enabled his followers to hang on.
But there remained the fact that the Lady Fani had tried to get himmassacred. He puzzled over it. The little yacht sped through spacetoward Walden. He tried to think how he'd offended Fani. He could thinkof nothing. He set to work on a new electronic setup which would makestill another modification of the Lawlor space-drive possible. In theothers, groups of electronic components were cut out and otherssubstituted in rather tricky fashion from the control board. This wastrickiest of all. It required the home-made vacuum tube to burn steadilywhen in use. But it was a very simple idea. Lawlor drive and landinggrid force fields were formed by not dissimilar generators, and balllightning force fields were in the same general family of phenomena.Suppose one made the field generator that had to be on a ship if it wasto drive at all, capable of all those allied, associated, similar forcefields? If a ship could make the fields that landing grids did, itshould be useful to pirates.
Hoddan's present errand was neither pure nor simple piracy, but piracyit would be. The more he considered the obligation he'd taken on himselfwhen he helped the emigrant-fleet, the more he doubted that he couldlift it without long struggle. He was preparing to carry on thatstruggle for a long time. He'd more or less resigned himself to thepostponement of his personal desires. Nedda, for example. He wasn'tquite sure-- Perhaps, after all--
* * * * *
But time passed, and he finished his electronic job. He came out ofoverdrive and made his observations and corrected his course. Finally,there came a moment when the fiery ball which was Walden's sun shonebrightly in the vision plates. It writhed and spun in the vast silenceof emptiness.
Hoddan drove to a point still above the five-diameter limit of Walden.He interestedly switched on the control which made his drive-unitmanufacture landing-grid-type force fields. He groped for Walden, andfelt the peculiar rigidity of the ship when the field took holdsomewhere underground. He made an adjustment, and felt the ship respond.Instead of pulling a ship to ground, in th
e setup he'd made, the newfields pulled the ground toward the ship. When he reversed theadjustment, instead of pushing the ship away to empty space, the newfield pushed the planet.
There was no practical difference, of course. The effect was simply thatthe space yacht now carried its own landing grid. It could descendanywhere and ascend from anywhere without using rockets. Moreover, itcould hover without using power.
Hoddan was pleased. He took the yacht down to a bare four-hundred-milealtitude. He stopped it there. It was highly satisfactory. He made quitecertain that everything worked as it should. Then he made a call on thespace communicator.
"Calling ground," said Hoddan. "Calling ground. Pirate ship callingground!"
He waited for an answer. Now he'd find out the result of very mucheffort and planning. He was apprehensive, of course. There was muchresponsibility on his shoulders. There was the liner he'd captured andlooted and given to the emigrants. There were his followers on theyacht, now enthusiastically sharpening their two-foot knife blades inexpectation of loot. He owed these people something. For an instant hethought of the Lady Fani and wondered how he could make reparation toher for whatever had hurt her feelings so she'd try to get his throatcut.
A whining, bitterly unhappy voice came to him.
"_Pirate ship!_" said the voice plaintively, "_we received the fleet'swarning. Please state where you intend to descend, and we will takemeasures to prevent disorder. Repeat, please state where you intend todescend and we will take measures to prevent disorder--_"
Hoddan drew a sharp breath of relief. He named a spot--a high-incomeresidential small city some forty miles from the planetary capital. Heset his controls for a very gradual descent. He went out to where hisfollowers made grisly zinging noises where they honed their knives.
"We'll land," said Hoddan sternly, "in about three-quarters of an hour.You will go ashore and loot in parties of not less than three! Thal, youwill be ship guard and receive the plunder and make sure that nobodyfrom Walden gets on board. You will not waste time committing atrocitieson the population!"
He went back to the control room. He turned to general-communicationbands and listened to the broadcasts down below.
"_Special Emergency Bulletin!_" boomed a voice. "_Pirates are landing inthe city of Ensfield, forty miles from Walden City. The population isinstructed to evacuate immediately, leaving all action to the police.Repeat! The population will evacuate Ensfield, leaving all action to thepolice. Take nothing with you. Take nothing with you. Leave at once._"
Hoddan nodded approvingly. The voice boomed again:
"_Special Emergency Bulletin! Pirates are landing ... evacuate ... takenothing with you.... Leave at once...._"
He turned to another channel. An excited voice barked:
"_... Seems to be only the one pirate ship, which has been locatedhovering in an unknown manner over Ensfield. We are rushing camera crewsto the spot and will try to give on-the-spot as-it-happens coverage ofthe landing of pirates on Walden, their looting of the city of Ensfield,and the traffic jams inevitable in the departure of the citizens beforethe pirate ship touches ground. For background information on this themost exciting event in planetary history, I take you to our editorialrooms._" Another voice took over instantly. "_It will be remembered thatsome days since the gigantic pirate fleet then overhead sent down acommunication to the planetary government, warning that single shipswould appear to loot and giving notice that any resistance--_"
* * * * *
Hoddan felt a contented, heart-warming glow. The emigrant fleet had mostfaithfully carried out its leader's promise to let down a letter fromspace while in orbit around Walden. The emigrants, of course, did notknow the contents of the letter. They would not send anybody down toground, because of the temptations to sin in societies other than theirown. Blithely, and cheerfully, and dutifully, they would give theappearance of monstrous piratical strength. They would awe Waldenthoroughly. And then they'd go on, faithfully leaving similar lettersand similar impressions on Krim, and Lohala, and Tralee, and Famagusta,and throughout the Coalsack stars until the stock of addressed missivesran out. They would perform this kindly act out of gratitude to Hoddan.
And every planet they visited would be left with the impression that thefleet overhead was that of bloodthirsty space-marauders who wouldpresently send single ships to collect loot--which must be yieldedwithout resistance. Such looting expeditions were to be looked forregularly and must be submitted to under penalty of unthinkableretribution from the monster fleet of space.
Now, as the yacht descended on Walden, it represented that mythical butimpressive piratical empire of Hoddan's contrivance. He listened withgenuine pleasure to the broadcasts. When low enough, he even picked upthe pictures of highways thronged with fugitives from the to-be-lootedtown. He saw Waldenian police directing the traffic of flight. He sawother traffic heading toward the city. Walden was the most highlycivilized planet in the Nurmi Cluster, and its citizens had had noworries at all except about tranquilizers to enable them to stand it.When something genuinely exciting turned up, they wanted to be there tosee it.
The yacht descended below the clouds. Hoddan turned on an emergencyflare to make a landing by. Sitting in the control room he saw his ownship as the broadcast cameras picked it up and relayed it to millions ofhomes. He was impressed. It was a glaring eye of fierce light,descending deliberately with a dark and mysterious spacecraft behind it.He heard the chattered on-the-spot news accounts of the happening. Hesaw the people who had not left Ensfield joined by avid visitors. He sawall of them held back by police, who frantically shepherded them awayfrom the area in which the pirates should begin their horrid work.
Hoddan even watched pleasurably from his control room as the broadcastcameras daringly showed the actual touch-down of the ship; the dramaticslow opening of its entrance port: the appearance of authentic piratesin the opening, armed to the teeth, bristling ferociously, glaring aboutthem at the here-silent, here-deserted streets of the city left to theirmercy.
It was a splendid broadcast. Hoddan would have liked to stay and watchall of it. But he had work to do. He had to supervise the pirate raid.
* * * * *
It was, as it turned out, simple enough. Looting parties of threepirates each moved skulking about, seeking plunder. Quaking cameramendared to ask them, in shaking voices, to pose for the news cameras. Itwas a request no Darthian gentleman, even in an act of piracy, couldpossibly refuse. They posed, making pictures of malignant ruffianism.
Commentators, adding informed comment to delectably thrilling pictures,observed that the pirates wore Darthian costume, but observed crisplythat this did not mean that Darth as an entity had turned pirate, butonly that some of her citizens had joined the pirate fleet.
The camera crews then asked apologetically if they would permitthemselves to be broadcast in the act of looting. Growling savagely fortheir public, and occasionally adding even a fiendish "Ha!" theyobliged. The camera crews helped pick out good places to loot for thesake of good pictures. The pirates co-operated in fine dramatic style.Millions watching vision sets all over the planet shivered in delicioushorror as the pirates went about their nefarious enterprise.
Presently the press of onlookers could not be held back by the police.They surrounded the pirates. Some, greatly daring, asked for autographs.Girls watched them with round, frightened, fascinated eyes. Younger menfound it vastly thrilling to carry burdens of loot back to the pirateship for them. Thal complained hoarsely that the ship was gettingoverloaded. Hoddan ordered greater discrimination, but his pirates bythis time were in the position of directors rather than lootersthemselves. Romantic Waldenian admirers smashed windows and brought themtreasure, for the reward of a scowling acceptance.
Hoddan had to call it off. The pirate ship was loaded. It was then thecenter of an agitated, excited, enthusiastic crowd. He called back hismen. One party of three did not return. He took two others and foughthis w
ay through the mob. He found the trio backed against a wall whilehysterically adoring girls struggled to seize scraps of their garmentsfor mementos of real, live pirates looting a Waldenian town!
But Hoddan got them back to the ship, in confusion tending toward theblushful. Their clothes were shreds. He fought a way clear for them toget into the ship. He fought his way in. Cheers rose from the onlookers.He got the landing port shut only by the help of police who kept piratefans from having their fingers caught in its closing.
Then the piratical space yacht rose swiftly toward the stars.
An hour later there was barely any diminution of the excitement insidethe ship. Darthian gentlemen all, Hoddan's followers still gazed andfloated over the plunder tucked everywhere. It crowded the livingquarters. It threatened to interfere with the astrogation of the ship.Hoddan came out of the control room and was annoyed.
"Break it up!" he snapped. "Pack that stuff away somewhere! What do youthink this is?"
Thal gazed at him abstractedly, not quite able to tear his mind andthoughts from this completely unimaginable mass of plunder. Thenintelligence came into his eyes--as much as could appear there. Hegrinned suddenly. He slapped his thigh.
"Boys!" he gurgled. "He don't know what we got for him!"
One man looked up. Two. They beamed. They got to their feet, drippingjewelry. Thal went ponderously to one of the two owners' staterooms theyacht contained. At the door he turned, expansively.
"She came to the port," he said exuberantly, "and said we were wearin'clothes like they wore on Darth. Did we come from there? I said we did.Then she said did we know somebody named Bron Hoddan on Darth? And Isaid we did and if she'd step inside the ship she'd meet you. And hereshe is!"
He unfastened the stateroom door, which had been barred from without. Heopened it. He looked in, and grabbed, and pulled at something. Hoddanwent sick with apprehension. He groaned as the something inside thestateroom sobbed and yielded.
Thal brought Nedda out into the saloon of the yacht. Her nose and eyeswere red from terrified weeping. She gazed about her in purestdespairing horror. She did not see Hoddan for a moment. Her eyes werefilled with the brawny, mustachioed piratical figures who were Darthiangentlemen and who grinned at her in what she took for evil gloating.
She wailed.
Hoddan swallowed, with much difficulty, and said sickly:
"It's all right, Nedda. It was a mistake. Nothing will happen to you.You're quite"--and he knew with desperate certainty that it wastrue--"safe with me!"
And she was.
The Pirates of Ersatz Page 11
