3
Trudie
I lay in bed, staring up at the business card for Laird Hindes. That was a hell of an Irish name, all right. All around me my roommates were chatting, and I longed for a place of my own. Fifty thousand dollars could get me that. Fifty thousand dollars could get my information wiped clean, could get me a new legal name, could get me whatever I wanted to keep Pete away from me forever. A lawyer for a restraining order even, if I wanted it. I could truly start over instead of looking over my shoulder all the time.
But what about the risk? Going away with a man I didn’t know? Red seemed to think it was a good idea. He’d sounded like he’d cracked a rib, he laughed so hard when I told him what Laird had said. “You should do it! It’ll be a blast, Laird’s a good guy and you’ll get to see Ireland!”
I hadn’t seen it that way. Of course, yes, those were all true things and I trusted Red’s assessment of Laird but… this was mad. This was absolute insanity. To pretend to be someone’s wife when I hadn’t even known him until now?
I played with my hair. My blonde hair. If I had fifty thousand dollars to start over, I could go back to my natural brunette.
One of my roommates raised her voice and I winced. It sure would be nice to have a place of my own. This co-op was better than staying with Pete. I wasn’t scared of my roommates or frantic about what to do if they came home and things weren’t exactly the way that they liked them. But living with these many people and having no personal space was pretty annoying too.
Ugh. What to do?
The thought haunted me all night, and in the morning. I barely slept. I dragged myself out of bed before my alarm, giving up on the whole sleep thing, and hey, silver lining! It meant there was only one person ahead of me in line for the shower.
When I got into work, Red was grinning at me. “Oh, shut up,” I told him, rolling my eyes and putting on my apron. “I haven’t said yes, yet.”
“Mmm, no, but you could do a lot worse than say yes,” Red pointed out. “It could be fun. Be spontaneous!”
“I can’t afford to be spontaneous.”
“You’ll still have your job when you get back, I promise. We won’t fire you.”
“I’m not listening!” I told him, going over to the coffee machine to refill it.
Standing at the counter was a tall man with curly brown hair, looking at me very intensely. Like he was sizing me up. I tried to ignore him, even as a swoop of fear hit my stomach. What if Pete had hired a private detective to find me? What if this was that detective and he was going to tell Pete where I was and…
The guy was still staring at me once I finished filling the machine. I set the bag of coffee down and turned around. “What, are you going to propose to me too?” I snapped.
The moment I said it I clapped my hand over my mouth, horrified at myself. I shouldn’t have talked to a customer that way! I could get in huge trouble!
The guy, however, just laughed. “Oh, you’re feisty, that’s good, he likes that. And you’ll need it to hold your own with his crazy relatives.” The guy held out his hand. “Sorry, I’m almost as shit at introductions as Laird is. I’m Jack, Laird’s best friend and a quarter of his impulse control.”
“Oh.” I shook Jack’s hand automatically. “Um. Hello.” I thought I might’ve seen him on my way out the door last night but I hadn’t been sure. “I’m still thinking about it. I don’t have an answer yet.”
“Oh, Laird didn’t send me. I just wanted to check you out for myself. But that’s good.” Jack nodded. “I’d be suspicious of you if you just jumped on the money right away.”
“Plenty of people could use money like that, I wouldn’t blame them if they did,” I replied.
Jack looked surprised by my response. I plowed forward before I could let him interrupt me, so that I could explain myself better.
“If someone had bad student loans, or bad tax debt, or had a kid and was desperate to look after them—or what if a relative just died? Funeral bills are astronomical.” I’d learned that when Mom had passed. It had been terrifying and I’d had to drop out of college in order to work full-time to pay for everything. It was that or have my Mom not get a proper funeral which, apparently, you could get fined for by the government if you didn’t bury someone properly? It was insane. “Laird seems like a nice guy. Red vouches for him. So why wouldn’t someone jump at the chance to have all their problems solved?”
Jack looked sufficiently chastised, but there was also a twinkle in his eye. “I like you,” he announced. “Keep that sass, you’ll need it to deal with Laird’s family.”
“I… I wouldn’t say that I’m sassy…”
“A strong backbone, then,” Jack said. “Laird’s family won’t let you get a word in edgewise if you don’t fight for it, so definitely keep a hold of that.”
I didn’t really see myself as having a strong backbone. I stayed with Pete for far too long. I jumped at every shadow. How could I possibly have a strong backbone for simply pointing out why he shouldn’t judge someone if they had jumped at the money? I was just trying to be fair.
Jack, though, seemed impressed with me.
“You can’t give me advice when I haven’t even said yes yet,” I pointed out.
Jack shook his head, smiling. “I hope you say yes, though. I can see why Laird picked you. Do you need me to wax poetic about how gorgeous Ireland is? Or how great the alcohol is?”
“I think I’m good,” I replied, but I was smiling now too. “And I’m still thinking about it.”
“Well, don’t think about it for too long,” Jack said. “Laird’s a good guy and if you don’t want to do this, I want him to have time to find someone else.”
I nodded. That was fair. “I’ll have an answer soon, I promise.”
Jack winked at me, then nodded at Red. “Have a great day, guys.”
Red nudged me playfully. “Your life sure has gotten interesting, hasn’t it?”
“Sure has.” Interesting was the last thing I wanted out of my life. But I had to figure out an answer to this odd proposal—and soon.
4
Laird
It had been days and I hadn’t heard from Trudie. I’d seen her working the coffee shop, and she’d smiled at me a few times when I’d walked by on my way to work, or on my way out to a lunch meeting, but she hadn’t said anything. It was killing me.
Didn’t help that I was… annoyingly attracted to her. I said ‘annoyingly’ given our situation. I couldn’t afford to be attracted to the woman that I would be fake-married to for weeks. That would just complicate things. Not to mention—even if it wouldn’t complicate things, my history of tripping and falling over my own tongue didn’t bode well for my ability to flirt with Trudie if I wanted to.
My mum had called twice already, and I wanted to be able to shove this in her face. Show her what lying got you. I was going to save face in front of my cousins, and then maybe, just maybe, I would consider letting my parents out of the doghouse on this one. Mum was trying to cover her own arse and I wasn’t having it. I was going to show up with a beautiful, sweet, lovely wife, and all my cousins would be impressed, and then my parents would see that I could get any girl that I wanted, if I wanted, I was just choosing not to right now. I wasn’t lonely, and I wasn’t hard up. It was just my choice—I hadn’t found anyone that sparked my interest enough to make it worth trying to get over my stupid inability to talk to a woman.
Hopefully this whole debacle would get my family off my back for the next couple of years, and by then, I would like to have actually found someone.
The fact that I kept picturing Trudie when I was imagining that ‘someone’ was not helping.
Liam kept badgering me about it, too. You’d think my little brother would have a little bit of sympathy, but oh no. He was using this opportunity to rib me mercilessly. Screw him, then.
I actually had an email from him about the whole wedding thing, and I put off answering it until the evening. Let him sweat it out wond
ering about who was getting put up in what room where for the reunion. If he wasn’t going to help me out of this jam…
I was just sitting down to finally answer the email when my cell rang.
Okay, it could’ve been my mom calling again. Or it might be Liam, fed up with my not answering him. Or Jack—but I’d just seen Jack.
What if it was Trudie?
My phone was in my jacket pocket, draped over a chair. I lunged for it, only to nearly knock myself out of my own chair in the attempt, and just managed to catch myself on the edge of my desk to save myself in time. Jesus Christ, could I be more of a klutz?
The phone was still ringing. I yanked my jacket across the desk, fumbled, got the phone out of my pocket, and answered it. “Laird Hindes speaking.”
“Laird? This is… this is Trudie.” Her voice was soft, tentative. “This is…”
“Trudie.” I winced, wondering if I sounded overeager, knowing that it was her instantly like that.
“Yeah.” I couldn’t be sure, over the phone, but it sounded like she was smiling. “Listen, I’ve been giving your offer a lot of thought… I haven’t kept you waiting too long, have I?”
“What? No, no, you’re fine. I mean—I nearly fell off my desk trying to get the phone when you called but, I’m not eager or anything.”
Trudie laughed, sounding surprised at herself for it. “Good to know. And here I was thinking you were… suave.”
“That’s my reputation, so if you could not tell anyone about the desk thing…” I found myself grinning into the phone.
“Oh, your secret is safe with me, sir,” Trudie replied, sounding overly serious. “Nobody will find out that you’re a massive dork.”
I faked a gasp. “I’ll have you know that you can’t like sports and be a dork!”
“Right, tell that to all the fans who paint themselves blue and wear cheese on their heads for sporting events. You guys are crazier than Comic Con fans and that’s saying something.”
I laughed, startled by her sense of humor but also grateful for it. She sounded like the kind of person who could hold her own among my family, and she’d sure need that if she was going to be exposed to them for a couple of weeks. My family’s full-blooded Irish and we could be… a lot.
“Well, prepare yourself, we’re a sports family so you’re going to hear a lot about rugby and soccer. My brother Liam’s the odd one, he plays basketball, my relatives all tease him for being too American.” I paused, realizing what I was saying. “That is… I mean if you—that’s only if you really want to—if you’re doing, um, this, you’re doing this, right? This is you calling to say you’re doing it?”
Trudie laughed again. I felt my face heating up, even though she couldn’t see me. “I—yes. Yes, I’ve thought about it, and I’m going to take you up on your offer. You seem like a good person. And I know what it’s like to be stuck in a bind. So… yes.”
She sounded warm and sincere, and I could feel myself melting even more for this woman. Dammit, if this kept up I was going to be in serious trouble, emotionally. But I could keep a lid on it. It was just that this was the first woman I’d been attracted to in a while, and the first woman I’d also really spoken to besides long-term friends. That was it.
“My parents are going to regret meddling,” I told her, grinning. “I love them, don’t get me wrong. They’re great parents. But they’re also really… getting into my business and not respecting my life and my choices.”
“Even good-intentioned people who love you can do that,” Trudie agreed. “And if you’re having fun with it, I don’t see the harm in this little… scheme.”
“Scheme. I like that. Makes it sound like I’m planning a bank heist.”
“I mean, we can do that too, but I don’t think you need the money.”
I laughed. Damn, I liked this woman’s sense of humor. “You’re right, I don’t. Well—we’re going to have to act like we’ve been together a long time, which means we have to get our story straight. Do you want to… meet up and get dinner in the next couple of days, we can hash everything out?”
She hadn’t mentioned the money, which I was glad of. I could understand why she needed the money. Plenty of people needed money like that, in our current economic hell. But I was glad that she didn’t seem to be focusing on that. She seemed to be a good person, someone who was in it to help me, as well, not just to make a quid.
“Sure.” Trudie sounded shy. “I’m free… pretty much every night, I don’t have… the glamorous life of a magazine owner.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’s not as glamorous as you’d think.” I didn’t want her to get so starry eyed around me that she couldn’t just be herself. “How about tomorrow evening then? Friday?”
“That—that works for me,” Trudie said, still sounding shy.
I smiled. “Great. I’ll just pick you up after work.” Convenient how we worked in the same building.
“Great. I’ll—I’ll see you then.”
“Great.” I winced and could’ve smacked myself for repeating myself like that. I was being such an idiot.
There was an awkward silence, and then Trudie said, “Well, bye, then.”
“Bye! Sleep well!” I hung up.
Sleep well!?
What the bloody hell was wrong with me! This poor woman was probably second guessing her choice to do this. Fuck. I just hoped that tomorrow would go well. I wanted to impress her. Why, I couldn’t say, but… I did. I wanted her to like me.
Perhaps a little too much.
5
Trudie
Nervous didn’t even begin to describe how I felt the next day waiting for Laird after work.
I hadn’t been alone with a man since Pete, and I knew, logically, that Laird wouldn’t hurt me, but I still couldn’t stop the tense knot in my stomach. And aside from that—what if he just got to know me better and didn’t like me? What if he changed his mind the more that he spent time with me? What if I was too… too shy, or weird, or blunt? What if my issues came up and I was too skittish and he decided that this wasn’t going to work between us after all?
I would be horribly embarrassed. No, humiliated. And I’d lose my chance to get enough money to keep Pete off my back forever and properly start a new life, get a proper apartment, have a savings account. I couldn’t afford to lose this chance—literally—and I really, really didn’t want my fear confirmed that after surviving Pete, I had still been irrevocably changed.
Laird being a super successful person and handsome as fuck really didn’t help, either. He was the kind of guy that I had never even dreamed I’d be able to get up the guts to talk to, and now I was supposed to somehow pretend to be his wife? This was just a mess in so many ways, I couldn’t even keep track.
“Oh, good, I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long.” Laird walked up, and my mouth went dry. He was just in a pair of well-fitting jeans and a dark green turtleneck today, but he looked amazing, like he’d stepped off the cover of a magazine. Fitting, seeing as he owned a magazine.
I stuck my hand out for him to shake. This was a business arrangement in a way, right? Hugging him felt too personal given that we’d only met once and spoken twice.
Laird looked down at my outstretched hand in amusement, and then shook it. I winced inwardly. Had I already embarrassed myself?
This was why I needed to get out and meet people, make this really a home. I had only had Pete for so long, and I needed to see who I was without him, but I couldn’t do that alone. I needed friends. To create a new family for myself.
Maybe… at the end of all of this, Laird and I could be friends. I only had Red, and he was a coworker before a friend, and Edith, who I loved but she wasn’t exactly someone I could go out and get drinks with. But Laird had loads of friends, I was sure. Perhaps he could help me make myself a new circle of people to be with.
“There a nearby café that I think you’ll love.” Laird blushed a little. It was adorable. “Well, I mean, I wouldn’t assume I
know what your taste is. But I really like eating there and I think you will too, so?”
Oh my God, he was so cute like this. For me, seeing someone stumble over their words and all that made much more sense than someone who always seemed to know what to say, who was suave and had the exact perfect poetic line to have you swooning. Pete had always been so charming, he’d always known how to talk to people. I didn’t trust that now. It felt like… like a façade. If someone was tripping over their words a bit, it meant they were saying what they really felt in the moment. It meant that it wasn’t rehearsed, that it was real.
Laird offered me his arm, and I felt my face heating up. Great, now I was the one blushing. It was something so simple, offering someone your arm, but nobody had ever done that for me. It was sweet. Something that a gentleman would do.
I took his arm and Laird tucked me into his side, keeping me somewhat sheltered against the cold as we exited out of the building’s lobby and onto the streets. It got dark early in the winter, understandably, and all around us the lights from buildings glowed, making the scene so much homier than before. I was still getting used to Chicago during the day, with its tall imposing buildings and all the insanity, but during the night all that seemed to soften and I felt welcomed, like I was a part of something.
“You’re very quiet,” Laird noted as we walked.
I felt my flush deepening, my face feeling like it was on fire. “Oh, I’m…”
“No, no, I like it! I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I’m not good at this whole… speaking to women thing, I never had been. All my friends who are women became friends with me out of pity, I swear. Just ask them.”
I laughed. “You seem like a good person. I’m sure they became friends with you because of that, too.”
“Don’t be so sure,” Laird muttered, but he seemed to be joking. “Anyway, if you’re quiet that’s okay, I don’t mind at all. You, um… are you generally quiet or outspoken? Ah…I am sorry if I am making you uncomfortable. But my family’s loud, I need to warn you.”
Forbidden First Times: A Contemporary Romance Collection Page 21
