“He’ll show up,” she said. “You said he’s a good guy.”
“He is,” I said, nodding. “I’m just nervous. This is the first time that we’ve gone out together. We haven’t really talked much.”
A sly smile spread across Beth’s face. “Annie Browne,” she said, shaking her head. “I never thought I’d say it after all this time, but you’re managing to surprise even me.”
I blushed. What could I possibly say to that?
I was even surprising myself.
12
Elliot
When I pulled into the circular driveway of the apartment building where Annie had asked me to meet her, I had to admit that I was almost nervous.
It had been a long time, over a decade and a half, since I’d gone on a first date with a woman. And Annie was no Tamara – thank God for that, I told myself as I put the car in park and climbed out.
Annie was different. She was sweet, special, non-judgmental, and kind.
Not to mention stunningly gorgeous – and entirely unaware of the fact, which just made her even hotter.
After I’d spent a couple of days remembering how poorly things had ended with Tamara, I’d tried to keep my thoughts away from Annie as best as I could.
Obviously, that hadn’t worked. If anything, thinking about my ex-wife and the horrific way I’d discovered her with my brother had only inspired me to make the next move where Annie was concerned. I had spent years alone, with my heart sealed off to the world, and now I felt like someone or something was giving me a sign.
Annie was my future, and if I wanted something real with her, I had to make the first move.
I parked the car, cleared my throat, and got out. The building was an older one, but there was a lobby, and I spotted Annie inside, sitting with another girl who looked to be around her age. When she looked up and saw me, Annie flushed and got to her feet. She pulled her friend into a one-armed hug, then waved and scampered out into the bright evening sunshine.
“Hey,” Annie said. She looked at me with her big blue eyes. Hot lust washed over me at the sight of her outfit – tight black pants that clung to her delicious hips and ass, and a loose shirt that in no way hide the tantalizing curve of her bust.
“You look amazing,” I told her.
Annie flushed. I pulled her into a soft kiss and ran my hands through her hair and down her back to her ass, which I squeezed gently. Annie moaned and pressed against me. Stepping away from her was an act of extreme willpower, and I nearly grunted with desire as I did so.
“So, where are we going?” Annie asked.
I smirked at her. “I think you’ll get a kick out of this place,” I told her. I led her to my Jaguar and opened the door for her, waiting until she had climbed inside before closing it.
As soon as I was behind the wheel, I set the air conditioning to full blast, and we pulled out of the parking lot.
“My parents and I used to eat here all the time when I was growing up,” I explained as I got on the highway and pointed the Jag in the direction of Boston.
Annie laughed. “Oh, so you mean in the last century?” She teased.
I snorted. “You must think you’re very funny,” I said, rolling my eyes.
Annie reached across the console and put her soft, pale hand on my thigh. I could feel the heat from her fingers through my pants, and I had to bite my tongue to keep from groaning. Just the slightest touch from her was enough to send me spiraling over the edge, and I suddenly wished that I’d jerked off before leaving the house, just as I’d done before dates in high school and college.
“You’re going to drive me crazy,” I said in a low voice. We were stopped at a light, and when I turned to Annie, I saw that she was biting her ripe lower lip. Leaning over, I gave her a quick kiss, tasting her mouth with my tongue and making her whimper and strain against the seat belt as she kissed me back.
God, this girl was something. Just the sight of her smile was enough to make me weak in the knees, and being with her made me feel like a million bucks, like I was the coolest man in the world.
“Good,” Annie said, giggling slightly as I pulled away. “I want to drive you crazy,” she admitted quietly. “Because you totally do the same thing to me.”
I had to hide my smirk as I pulled into an older neighborhood and slowed the Jaguar to a crawl. It wasn’t long before we reached our destination – The Chateau, a classic Italian restaurant that I’d spent nearly every Sunday from age five to fifteen, eating dinner in after church. After parking the car, Annie and I got to our feet, and I took her hand as we walked inside.
Inside, The Chateau – or “The Chat,” as I’d called it when I was a kid – hadn’t changed one bit. It was almost like the inside of a Vegas casino with a lurid carpet printed in all shades of red, burgundy, and gold. The walls were papered with red faux-silk, and checkered oilcloths topped every table, just as they had for decades.
“I know this place is really cheesy, but I thought you’d get a kick out of it,” I said to Annie, squeezing her hand as we walked to the hostess’s podium.
Annie laughed. “I love it,” she said. “I’m like, heavy into kitsch.”
I snorted. Her sense of humor was so perfect – the right blend of self-deprecating and witty, and I realized that I was looking forward to getting to know her almost as much as I was looking forward to fucking her later.
We were seated at a small table off to the side, and I ordered a bottle of the house white wine and some garlic breadsticks and grilled calamari and fried ravioli to start. As soon as the food came, Annie dug in without a trace of self-consciousness, and I leaned back and grinned at her, sipping my wine, as she exclaimed over the food.
“I see why your parents dragged you here every week,” Annie said, swallowing with a satisfied smile on her face. “This stuff is excellent.”
I laughed. “It’s kind of a relic,” I admitted. “But I’m glad to be sharing it with you.”
Annie’s smile faded by just a touch. “What made you decide to actually ask me out,” she asked, cocking her head to the side and reaching for her glass of wine. “I didn’t think you actually wanted to ... you know, see me,” she added, raising an eyebrow at me as she took a sip.
“I wanted to,” I admitted. “I ... I’ve been doing some thinking, you know? I’ve been alone for a long time. I guess I thought that was going to be the case for the rest of my life.”
Annie snorted. “Please,” she said. “You could be with any woman you wanted.”
I groaned.
“What?” Annie asked. She had a mischievous look on her face. “What did I say?”
“It’s nothing,” I told her. “I’ve just done that, you know? I got sick of it. And then I was married, and that didn’t go well, and here I am.”
“With me,” Annie finished. “You’re not alone. I’m here.”
The atmosphere between us was strangely serious for a moment, and our gazes locked. Annie’s big blue eyes looked as dark as sapphires in the dim lighting of the restaurant, and she was breathing hard. The wine had put some pink in her cheeks, and her lips were so glossy, so tempting, that I had to restrain myself from leaning over the table and kissing her.
“You are,” I said. “And it’s a good thing, too, because there’s no way a single person should be eating this much fried food.”
Annie laughed.
“You’re funny,” she observed, blinking at me. “My dad always said that, but I guess it’s true.”
I laughed. “Your parents have to think that I’m the biggest jackass in the world,” I told her. “I’ve been avoiding them for weeks, because of you.”
“Mom thinks you’re avoiding her,” Annie said. She rolled her eyes. “I can’t be in the room with them when they’re talking about you; it makes me feel so totally awkward that I can’t stand it.” She paused for a second, reaching for a breadstick and toying with it before taking a bite. “I need to get out of that house like, yesterday,” she continued, chewing a
nd swallowing. “I’ve been looking at jobs and applying to like, anything that I’m qualified for whether or not I actually want it, and I’ve only gotten one call for an interview ... and then they canceled it,” she admitted. “It’s really frustrating.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “I might know some people looking to hire recent grads,” I said slowly.
Annie gasped before clapping her hands together. Her eyes were as wide as I’d ever seen them, and I couldn’t help but smile at her reaction.
“It wouldn’t be glamorous work,” I said quickly. “Probably a lot of assistant, admin-level type stuff. You probably wouldn’t want to be there forever, but it would be a good thing to start listing on your resume.”
My words did nothing to dull Annie’s excitement – she was practically bouncing in her seat, her eyes lit and glittering with happiness.
“I don’t care,” Annie said quickly, shaking her head so quickly that her blonde hair obscured her face. She burst out laughing and pushed it away, then gave me a shy, happy smile.
“I’d love whatever you could do for me,” Annie said after a moment, breathing hard and still grinning. “I really appreciate it, Elliot, I do.”
Our entrees came – veal parmigiana for Annie and seafood linguine for me – and we lapsed into a comfortable silence as we ate.
I could get used to this, I thought, as I looked up and watched my gorgeous girl nibbling a bite of veal off her fork.
It would have been all too easy. Scheduling dates with Annie, seeing her several times a week, continuing the Pritzker family tradition of The Chateau every Sunday.
But something about that, our hypothetical future together, gave me pause. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to keep seeing her – this was already easily one of the best dates I’d had in my adult life – but rather our glaring differences, the fact that we were in two very different places in life, the fact that Annie would want more.
And that she should have more. She should have someone her own age, someone who would worship her and spend all of his time with her. Not someone who was stuck working long hours.
My love for work had effectively killed my first marriage.
What would it do to my relationship with Annie?
Annie didn’t seem to notice how quiet I’d become. She started chattering again halfway through her meal, talking about how college had been so fun, but she was ready to move on, about how her best friend was struggling with her sister, about how living at home again felt like being in high school once more. She rambled on and on, not caring that I wasn’t giving her a decent response to anything she said.
By the time the waiter came to take our dessert orders (cannoli and tiramisu), I was in a deep funk that I couldn’t seem to see a way out of.
“Elliot?”
The sound of Annie’s voice broke through my concentration and I looked up to see her peering at me.
“Sorry,” I said.
“You were totally spacing,” Annie said. She reached across the table and gave my hand an affectionate squeeze. Guilt bubbled to the surface of my mind, like a geyser, and I forced a smile. Based on the way her eyes were hanging all over me, she was clearly deep in heavy infatuation.
I hated knowing that eventually, I was going to wind up breaking her heart.
“I know,” I admitted. “I’m sorry. I think I’m just tired.”
Annie’s smile faltered a touch. “Do you just want to go home,” she asked, almost timidly. “Because I was hoping that we could spend a few hours together after dinner,” she added, back to her usual sass. “And if you really are tired, we could just, you know. Hang out and watch a movie,” Annie finished.
I didn’t reply. When the waiter came, I paid in cash and told the waiter to keep the change. Annie and I walked out to my Jag in near silence – she kept trying little hopeful comments, but I didn’t latch on. I was too deep in my own mind, too angry with myself for making such an egregious mistake.
I never should’ve asked her out, I told myself as I opened the Jaguar’s passenger side door open for Annie. Now, she’s going to expect so much ... she’s going to think that I’m serious about her, that I want to be with her for a long time.
And the worst part was, I did. I did want to be with her. But I had my job to worry about – and my reputation at said job. If it came out that a board member of Empire Events was seeing someone young enough to be his daughter, it would ruin me.
And it could ruin her life, too. I pictured Annie’s face in the newspaper, grinning saucily under some kind of headline meant to imply that she was nothing more than a cheap slut.
It killed me.
“Elliot,” Annie asked tentatively, when I’d started the Jag. “What’s wrong?”
I sighed loudly but didn’t answer her.
Annie huffed. “I can tell that something’s bothering you,” she said finally. “Can you just spit it out already,” she added in kind of a whine. “It’s making me anxious, not knowing what’s on your mind.”
I closed my eyes for a moment. I thought back to the restaurant, how she’d practically cheered and clapped when I’d told her that I could help her with a job, like a child. How she was so naïve – how she was so guileless and unguarded. How aside from living in the dorms at her college, she’d never been alone before.
Opening my eyes, I sighed and backed the Jag out of my parking space. It was only once we were on the highway that I turned back to Annie.
“I just want you to know, I like you,” I told her. “But anything that happens between us has to be temporary – you know that, right?”
It was dark, and only the bands of light from the highway lamps showed Annie’s face. Still, I could tell that what I had said had made her deeply unhappy, and I felt the guilt burn inside of me like a brand.
“I don’t understand why,” she said finally. “We like each other. We’re having fun together. What’s wrong with seeing where it goes?”
“Because I work too much,” I said. “And because your life is just getting started – trust me, you’re not going to want a boyfriend who works seventy hours a week.”
Annie narrowed her eyes into slits. “Nice of you to tell me what I want,” she shot back. “What if I don’t care? What if I’m busy working, too?”
I sighed again. “Annie, the kind of job you’re going to get, well, it’s not going to be that kind of job – at least, not right away.”
“Oh, so I’m stupid now, is that it?”
“No,” I said hotly. “But you’re young – no entry-level job is going to need to hang around for that long. What would you do when I’m working?”
“I’d see my friends,” Annie insisted. “And I’ve been thinking about going to grad school, that would give me time for classes!” Her voice rose in pitch as she became more emotional. “And honestly, I don’t love that you’re telling me what to do right now!”
“I’m not telling you what to do,” I said sharply. “But I don’t think you’ve really considered what being in a relationship with me would be like, and I think you have major rose-colored glasses on at the moment.”
Annie crossed her arms over her chest and huffed, turning to the window.
“I’m not trying to hurt you,” I said. “But I think we started moving a little too fast, and—”
“It’s fine,” Annie said hotly. Her voice was shaky, and seconds later, I heard sniffling. The sound of her crying broke my heart – I wanted nothing more than to pull the car over and take her into my arms, but I couldn’t, or I’d risk negating literally everything that I’d just said.
This sucked. I hated hurting her, but I was the adult here. I was the one who knew what was best for her – after all, I’d been twenty-one myself, once. It just made me angry that she was being so stubborn, that she was refusing to listen. Dozens of times, I opened my mouth in hopes of saying something to make it better, but there was nothing I could say – not without reigniting some hope in Annie that I hadn’t meant it.
&
nbsp; I felt my despair growing by the second. Was this really what I wanted, to push away the only decent woman I had met in years?
It was unfortunate, but I had to. There was no other choice – not with my career and her age and her inexperience. I had really felt something for her, but that had to be over now.
It was only when I slowed the Jag to a crawl outside of Annie’s parents’ house that I remembered she’d met me closer to the city, that she’d borrowed her mother’s car.
“Wait,” I said, as Annie put her hand on the door handle. “I forgot about your mom’s car – I’m sorry. I’ll drive you back, or call an Uber for you if you want.”
When Annie turned to me, her face was illuminated by streetlights. She was still incredibly beautiful, but the look in her big blue eyes was enough to kill me.
“Forget it,” she said in a flat, toneless voice. “It’s fine. I’ll get it tomorrow.”
And just like that, she was gone.
13
Annie – Three Weeks Later
After my botched date with Elliot, I stayed in bed for weeks. I told Mom and Dad that I was sick – that was my excuse for having left her Subaru at Beth’s sister’s place – and they seemed to buy it, at least they did at first. Mom came by every afternoon with chicken noodle soup and crackers and sat by the bed as she watched me eat. But I could barely keep anything down. One day, I even threw up six times.
“Annie, hon, I’m worried about you,” Mom said. She frowned, then gave me a guilty smile. “I have to admit, I thought you were faking at first ... but you seem like you’re getting worse by the day. Have you thought about calling Dr. Gaither?”
I groaned and buried my face in my hands for a moment, until the nausea became too much, and I had to sit in and suck in a few deep mouthfuls of air.
“He’s my childhood doctor,” I told her. “What’s he going to do now? Diagnose me with a cold?”
Mom’s brow furrowed. “I know he was your pediatrician, honey, but he’s a very good doctor. I’m going to call him and have you go in tomorrow. I’ll drive you,” she added.
Forbidden First Times: A Contemporary Romance Collection Page 89
