by Ellie Jean
Heaviness of his large hand weights my leg. “It’s going to be okay. I’ve got you now.”
My body folds farther into the cushioned seat, but the heat comforts me after I initially flinch. I concentrate on my breathing so I can try and talk again.
“What’s your name, baby?” His voice is quiet and soothing, unlike his presence.
“Bl-Blue-B…”
Looking straight ahead, I flick my vision to the mirror and study his face, trying to find answers to why I am sitting in this car with a stranger.
I heave in a huge breath and release it. “Bluebell.”
A slight smile graces his lips as I say my name, making him look more human. His brown eyes look deadly and stern, yet I swear they are familiar. Am I wishing again and my mind’s playing tricks on me? His jaw’s rigid and locked.
“So, Bluebell. What’s got you all tangled up in the parking lot?” Cool and calm, he looks at me briefly before putting his eyes back on the road, squeezing my thigh. My body feels it zap right through it. What is that?
Shaking my head, I need to tell him where to take me.
“I li-liv-I-live… at… fif…”
“You can stop right there. I’m not taking you anywhere but to the doctor to get looked at. Plus, you were scared out of your mind back there. I need to know what that’s about before I let you out of my sight. I’d never forgive myself if I heard on the news in a day or two something happened to you.”
What?
My brain isn’t comprehending what this guy is saying. Why wouldn’t he want to get rid of me as fast as he can?
“No. I ju-just need t-t-to go ho-h-home.” Panic reels through me, but my leg heats under his hand and the soft way he is stroking it to try to calm me is working. It’s the most ridiculous notion, but I feel safe with this stranger, almost comfortable.
“Here’s what we will do. I don’t think you have done any serious damage, so we will skip the doctor and you can come with me for a bit until we work out what’s got you frightened. Once I understand what the hell is going on, then I can assess how I can help and whether it’s safe or not for you to be by yourself.” He looks at me again and tears roll from my eyes in frustration.
“For fuck’s sake, you can’t even talk, you’re that scared.”
My stomach plummets with his abrupt voice. He has no idea I don’t talk to men, and I go out of my way to be away from males. I knew I should have tried harder not to be such an introvert, now it’s blowing back in my face, big time. He thinks I’m scared silly because of what I was running from. But that’s only part of it.
My breathing finally evens out, my mind is slowing and my limbs are soft. This doesn’t happen. I haven’t been close to a man in years and here I am in a car, not three feet away from one, and I haven’t had the urge to run or pass out from anxiety. Albeit, I don’t think running is in my choices for now, anyway.
A smile touches my lips for a second and I turn my head toward his.
“O-Okay.”
What’s the worst that can happen? I’m already on the hit list of a killer now and he will find me and more than likely kill me. At least for a few hours, I can rest, watch a delicious guy try to work out the inner workings of myself—which has never been accomplished before and I can sort through how the heck I am going to stay alive.
Closing my eyes, I don’t care about where I’m going or that I am with a stranger. I need to keep calm so I can try to talk like a normal human being when we stop so he doesn’t think I’m some kind of loon.
It’s going to take every ounce of energy left in my sore body.
Have you ever noticed with each blink, things change.
For good, for bad, or with no consequence.
Whether it be a speck of dust falling to the ground, a star twinkling in the night sky, a clench of a fist, a sound in the distance, a breeze floating across your skin.
It’s inevitable.
Nothing stays the same forever and I wouldn’t want it to, if I am being honest with myself.
It seems like only a few months ago, not years, my brothers and I started The Savage Shadows, causing destruction and boosting cars so we could have a better life, aspiring to be the law of LA.
Making it to the top in a short span of time, we continue to stay there through hard work, much contest and death. I don’t want it any other way.
I can’t say the same for my brothers. And I honestly understand their thinking, having to worry about blowback on my sister, but working through things in my head, by myself is what I need to find clarity.
My eyes blinked.
Jerking my foot to the brake pedal, screeching tires brought me to a halt. The smell of rubber wrapped around me.
Jumping to her aide, a small body crumbled on the concrete, her body shuddered in pain. She needed help and from a professional by the way she was holding her shoulder. But a thud of thunder quaked through me when my eyes landed on crystal blue irises and my throat clenched. A cloud of tire smoke may have entered my brain making it hazy in a second.
It couldn’t be her?
Shaking my head, why the fuck did that thought pop into my head?
There’s no way after so many years I would nearly run over a girl I silently craved when I was a teenager. But her wounded body and her terrified eyes grip my heart like it did back when I was a kid.
Trying to catch another glance at her face, my blood thrashes through my body at the mere thought it could be her, but the light is angled in the wrong direction. Her hair isn’t brown, but she is small. Fuck, we were all small, I was fifteen.
Frantic, hurt, and scared for her life, my hand touched her skin, reassuring her. I’d seen Melody through so many crises I knew how to tread carefully with a woman who was panicked, but an overwhelming sensation and memory took a hold of my mind. This is what I do. Fix problems of people I care for.
My protective streak kicked up a gear, spearing through any haziness.
I needed to be the one to help this woman.
Hence now why she is now sitting in my car, headed with me to my cabin where everything was to become clear.
Instead, I’m now not alone and things are anything but clear.
“I’m Ocean.” My eyes stay on the dimly lit road, but my hand feels a twinge in her leg. “I was on the way to my cabin to sort through a few things. We can chat there and check you over.”
Black straight hair falls around her face, framing her petite features. Bluebell’s breathing is relaxed enough for her to close her eyes. The crystal blue hue of her large orbs struck me first when I picked her up off the road, captivating me completely, again.
I know this woman. I’d brought some flowers for Emerald a few weeks back from her in the hospital.
That must be the connection I felt on the road?
Her expressive eyes that seem too big for her face, pierced me and the blush that crept over her cheeks when I spoke to her and touched the skin of her hand melted my hardened heart for a second. Late each night, I found myself replaying that moment over in my thoughts. She had penetrated my mind, broke through my steeled layers and no girl had done that for a very long time.
Then bam! Devine intervention almost has me squashing her with my ride.
Wrapping my hands around her waist, taking care of her, I knew I had to find out the reason why this girl has such an effect on me. It is a perfect opportunity and in my line of business, it’s rare that happens. I wasn’t taking no for an answer.
Listening to the hum of the motor and breaths escaping her lips, I look across at her frequently. Her knees drawn together are pointed away from me, her arms wrap around her body, and at times I’m graced with her eyes opening up and taking a peek at me.
“Your blush is beautiful.” I can’t resist this time.
Snapping her head from me, I grin and chuckle. “You shouldn’t hide your face, baby. It’s gorgeous.”
“Ummm.”
“I won’t lie to you.”
Twisting
her neck back so her eyes stare straight at me, her lips tip up a little at the ends into a small smile.
My fucking heart skips a beat.
I turn and watch the road again ‘cause this is unknown territory.
“I was at the hospital visiting my brother, who isn’t technically my blood brother but my brother in every sense apart from that, ‘cause his girl gave birth to a baby boy—Jayce. Everyone was there except my sister Melody. Slate, Caden, Emerald, and Lace, squished into one room to celebrate him coming out of the neonatal unit today. Three weeks it had taken for him to be strong enough to be allowed out.” Blood pumps around my body at full speed. I can’t stop myself from babbling.
I don’t dare look to Bluebell.
“I’ve had to visit that damn hospital too much lately, but at least it was for good reason this time.” I chuckle to myself. “Christ, my brother can take the hardest hits, Tanner fights, but he’s not going to know what’s hit him when he gets home with a baby. Although he will make the best dad. Fierce, protective, and a sucker for doing anything Crystal says.”
Taking a breath, I reach for my candy and throw some fruit-flavored balls of sugar into my mouth. “Would you like some?”
“No thank you.”
Nodding my head to myself, I go back to rambling. “I brought flowers off you a few weeks back. Emerald had been rundown by a lunatic rival of ours, she broke her leg or ankle. Laid up for weeks. Didn’t stop her and those girls getting into trouble, having to dodge bullets, and seeing too much of our cutthroat world.”
A gasp reverberates around the car.
Fuck.
I’m a total dickhead.
Flicking my head to the side, her eyes are wider than before, but they are still trained on me, but she’s leaning away.
Christ. It’s like deja vu. I’ve seen this horror before on a gorgeous young girl’s face. But her name wasn’t Bluebell.
“Damn. Sorry, Bluebell.” My skin is heated but a chill runs up my spine thinking she’s repulsed by me. “I promise I won’t hurt you.” My voice comes out gruffer than a minute ago. “I won’t lie to you, yes, I’m into dangerous shit. My brothers and I control much of LA. I won’t apologize for that. We’ve worked hard and now we’re in a good place. There are enemies who always want to take us down, but we deal with threats and if they touch our families they pay. So, I guess, in a way, you almost being squashed under my wheel tonight could be the best thing that’s happened if you’re in trouble, ‘cause I vow that no one’s going to touch one strand of your hair while I’m around.”
“Oh…”
I second that ‘oh.’ What kind of promise am I making here? The pull is too great to cast her aside and send her off to the wolves.
I keep my focus on the night road and clamp my teeth together.
I’ve spilled enough secrets for a lifetime in the space of five minutes.
But the waver in her voice spears me. Her petite body wrapped tightly in a ball on my front seat, wide eyes bursting with unknown fear and her increased breathing is too much to handle while I am driving. I’ve lost control and it’s rare that happens.
An urge pulses through me to enclose her in my arms and protect her from everything bad in this world.
I haven’t known this feeling for a lifetime.
Confusion swarms my head.
What the fuck is happening?
Until there is space and I’m not consumed by her. There’s to be no more words and no more looking at Bluebell.
Listening to his gravelly voice soothed me.
I was in a trance, calmness enveloped me.
My eyes shut.
But his name bombarded me.
“I’ll have a mixed bag of candy and a packet of Skittles, please.”
My stomach flip-flops. Just like it does every day he comes into the shop at four-thirty to buy a concoction of candies. Tall and lean with dark hair, he looks older than me. Probably fourteen. Way out of my league. At twelve and not allowed out except to attend school and work at the family corner store, I have no experience at all talking to boys.
“Are you stupid or something?”
My dad’s voice booms across the back of the counter aimed at me. “I told you to finish mopping the filthy floor and then go and empty those boxes that came in this afternoon. They aren’t going to unpack themselves.”
Jumping out of my skin, my eyes dart from the boy to my father who is red-faced and agitated. Moving away, I give a quick nod to the boy and almost run from the view of my dad. I need to finish these chores and get home before he comes looking for me here. He’s in a bad mood and if I get in his way, I’ll be sorry for it.
Thirty minutes later, with an aching back and arms, the sun’s dipping down behind the horizon. My steps are slower than they should be walking a block down to the house.
“Psst…”
Clutching my chest, my head spins until I spy the boy from the shop hiding behind a tree trunk.
“You okay?”
“I will be once I get home.” Heaving a sigh, I focus on getting home, not the heavenly boy who is now talking to me.
“Is that prick who yelled at you your dad?”
“Yeah.” Moving my feet, I keep walking. “I have to go.”
Jogging to catch up to me, his body brushes against mine. I let him.
“He needs a kick up the ass for treating you like that.” He passes me a gummy and I take it.
“I should have been working, it’s my fault anyway.”
Hands clasp my shoulders, and we stop. “No, it fucking wasn’t. Don’t let him talk to you like that.”
“And then what? Have him get home and remind me who the person is that takes care of me and my brother? I’d prefer just to do as I’m told.”
I see it when the enormity of what I said registers on his face.
I start walking again and he stays still. After a few steps, I call back, “Hey, what’s your name?”
His deadly look stares straight at me and he yells out, “Ocean.”
“Thanks for trying to help, Ocean.”
My head jolts, waking me.
“Bullets and seeing too much of our cutthroat world.”
Gasping, my body instantly moves back from the man who is running at the mouth. I thought guys were usually over talking for the sake of talking. What Ocean’s saying is private information. It’s about his family. I wonder why he is telling me, a stranger, these things? Why is he revealing information that will make me see him in a bad way?
I’m definitely no guy expert but this makes no sense.
Shivering, instinct takes a hold of my body and I curl up tighter, but I keep my eyes on the commanding man who is taking me away from my immediate danger. As long as it’s not replaced with a different kind of danger from him. As much as he is telling me how ruthless he can be, it has to be near impossible to meet another Ocean who is trying to save me. Feeling a little lighter inside, surely not all Oceans are dark-eyed, handsome, and in the business of saving women. It’s uncanny and crazy, but I believe that I am safer with this potent man than anyone in my life at the moment.
Watching him closely, thoughts running rampant. I should ask him if he used to buy candy at a small market every day at four-thirty in the afternoon, but I’ll be lucky to get one word out and I’ll look like more of an idiot. Shutting myself down again, my mind wanders listening to the hum of the motor.
I don’t have close friends. My social life is worse than a nun’s. Working in my own business for five years consumes my life. Which is a blessing when you are socially awkward around people. My work makes me happy. Being a florist was a dream of mine from an early age, finding happiness in the garden I planted at home. My brother and father had no time for me unless they needed a chore completed or someone to scream at. The garden was my solitude. Risking a beating, I took flower seed packets from the shop Dad ran when I could. Watching new life spring up and blossom into something beautiful reminded me to have hope. Knowing one day I would
find myself and bloom. Instead the opposite became true.
Being degraded with every word or action from my family, believing I was only good enough to do the cleaning, cooking, working in the shop, and a punching bag for my father and brother through the years shaped me into how I am today.
Mentally and physically.
Unable to speak to men without stuttering.
Hanging my head low when in public ignoring everyone.
Limited contact with people.
Working, living for my business, and breathing when I’m there, is perfection. It’s my life and where I am normal. Talking to customers, all clients, without any problem.
“We’re here.”
His eyes stay on the road and I watch his arms flex as he turns the wheel onto a dirt road. “O-Okay.”
“Once we get inside, we will figure out what has you spooked and how the problem can be solved so you’re not frightened out of your skin and lost for words.”
If only it was that simple.
Water runs through the pipes, taunting me with each trickle. Her naked body only feet away from me.
But she’s untouchable.
For now.
Bluebell required assistance from the car to the cabin and she shook that much, I was concerned shock had set in. She couldn’t speak and after I planted her safely on the high stool at the benchtop, I went and turned on the lights so the dusty place didn’t give off the vibe of the Bates Motel. Bluebell was close to a basket case already without the shadows and darkened corners looming near her to scare her further. I’d suggested, if strong enough she should go and warm herself up in the shower and I’d get the fire started to help with the cold circulating throughout the cabin. She took me up on the offer without a second glance. Hobbling as fast as she could to the door I pointed at.
Anyone would think she was trying to get away from me.
The cabin has been in my family for years. Dad’s great-grandfather built it as a place he would go to for peace and quiet. It wasn’t far out of LA but far enough to find solitude when needed. Dad left me the keys when he went to Australia the first time. I haven’t been here in years. The musty smell proves it. Tomorrow I will give it a quick spring clean considering I could be here a while.
