by Nia Arthurs
From this vantage, they could admire the majestic Cayo hills and the river that snaked lazily through the caves. Evening sunlight burst between the leafy foliage and brushed everything it touched with a golden glow.
“It all looks so tasty.” Seo Ah clicked the iron prongs as she stood before the buffet. “Benson, you’re from Belize. What should I have?”
Knowing her Korean pallet would favor the spicier dishes, he led her to the curry chicken and white rice with fried plantain and potato salad. They swiped one of the miniature Marie sharp pepper bottles and carried their plates to the table.
The food was delicious and the gentle breeze calmed his stomach so he didn’t feel like throwing up anymore. When Benson came up for air, he realized he was wolfing his food alone.
He swallowed and glanced at Seo Ah. “You alright?”
“I’m fine.” She pasted a smile on her face. “I had so much fun today. I’m just disappointed we didn’t get to an island to swim with the dolphins or visit the Barrier Reef.”
“Belize will always be here. You can come back and visit,” he said casually.
Seo Ah stiffened. “Visit, huh?”
Benson set his fork down and tried to conjure the words he hadn’t been able to find last night. “I want to apologize, Seo Ah. I should have seen how upset you were when you talked about that professor, but instead I got caught up in my feelings.”
“Anyone would have reacted the way you did.”
He shook his head. “You deserve better than that. No matter what that piece of crap did, you’re still a treasure. I know that more than anyone.”
“Why does it sound like a ‘but’ is coming?” Her smile trembled.
“I can’t lie. I did miss you. For a long, long time.”
“But you’ve moved on.” She finished for him. “You want Carrie.”
Benson’s jaw dropped. “How did you…?”
“Besides the fact that you stare at her like she’s your next meal?” Seo Ah chuckled sadly. Her thick eyelashes bounced. “I know you, Benson. And I got to know Carrie a little. She’s a beautiful person. Inside and out.”
“She cares about you too, you know.”
“Oh? Did she say that?”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “She’s resisting me because she thinks we’re together.”
“You can put her at ease now, right?” Seo Ah cleared her throat.
“Yeah.” A brilliant smile bloomed. “Yeah, I guess I can.”
“That’s great. Could you… excuse me?”
Benson stood when Seo Ah pushed her chair back, got to her feet and stumbled to the bathroom. He thought he saw tears in her eyes when she passed him, but he wasn’t sure.
Benson felt sorry for causing her pain, but he was glad they’d spent the day together and that they’d cleared the air. He knew for a fact that Seo Ah would be able to find someone ten times better than he with no problems.
For now, they were better as friends.
When Seo Ah returned to the table, her eyes were clear and her face as composed as ever. He watched her closely as she slipped into her seat and picked up her fork. “You good?”
“I’m great.” She laughed. “Never better.”
Benson took her words at face value since that seemed like the kindest thing to do and finished his meal. When they were done, he escorted her to his car and drove her back to the hotel.
The ride was quiet. Seo Ah didn’t say much even when he opened her door for her and remained by her side until she was in front of her room.
Finally, she turned to him. “Thank you for spending your Sunday with me. I really had a wonderful time.”
He dipped his head.
She rose on the tips of her toes and clutched his shoulders. Benson stood still while Seo Ah pressed a whisper-soft kiss to his cheek. She pulled back, eyes downcast. “Even if we’re not together anymore, can we still talk now and again?”
Of course.”
She nodded, still avoiding his gaze. “Goodbye, Benson.”
“Have a safe flight back, Seo Ah.” He turned away and strode to the elevators.
On the way down, he leaned against the wall and skimmed his phone until it settled on Carrie’s number.
The doors opened.
Benson shook his head and slipped his phone into his pocket before heading out. Carrie would be at work tomorrow. Now that he’d firmly closed this door, it was time he opened another one.
13
The women at Sweet Treats were absolutely no help. Carrie was starting to question her association here.
“He was so hot, Sky!” Jo squealed. “Handsome in a suave way. Like spicy Asian butter.”
Spicy… what?
“When he looked at me, I kind of just…” Jo fanned her face. “Seriously, you should have been there.”
“Don’t you have a boyfriend?” Carrie snapped, her voice muffled since it was stuffed with brownies.
“I’m just stating the facts.” Jo shrugged, unrepentant.
Sky inhaled thoughtfully. “Is Benson going to be there tonight?”
“No!” Carrie jumped to her feet, cradling the plate of brownies to her chest. “You guys are not allowed to embarrass me at my place of work.”
“Why not?” Jo blinked innocently.
Carrie resisted the urge to pop a brownie and throw it at Jo’s curly head. “Because you almost gave me away last time and Sky is a horrible liar.”
“I am not!” Sky huffed.
Carrie flashed her a disbelieving look.
Sky shirked back. “Okay, you might have a point…”
“What about me?” Jewel piped up softly. She wore her usual bun. Baggy clothes covered her amazing figure. “Can I come?”
Everyone froze and stared at her.
Carrie picked her jaw up off the floor. “J-Jewel?”
“As long as no one touches me, I’ll be fine.”
“Maybe when you’re older.” Sky squeezed the young woman’s shoulders and fixed her eyes on Carrie. “And you.”
“Me?” Carrie squirmed.
“If you’re so convinced that Benson has a girlfriend, why do you keep sticking your tongue down his throat?”
“He kissed me first.”
“Mm-hm.” Jo arched both eyebrows. “And I’m sure you pushed him away and explained that what you’re doing is wrong.”
“Well…” Carrie’s gaze darted around.
“Then you scolded him about being a jerk, slapped him and stalked out of there,” Sky added.
“Um…”
“Look at her face!” Jo snorted.
“Guys, this is serious!” Carrie moaned. “I’m going crazy here.”
Jo wandered over and threw an arm over her shoulder, brown eyes sparkling with mischief. “You wanna know what I think?”
“Not particularly—”
“I think you’re using Seo Ah as an excuse to keep Benson at arm’s length.”
“What?” Carrie pursed her lips. “That’s insane.”
“I watched them yesterday,” Jo said. “Seo Ah tried to hold Benson and he pulled away. He didn’t look at her once when we were there. Then when Arnold came…”
“Arnold?” Sky’s head whipped up.
“It’s a long story,” Carrie said, afraid to expose her ‘hook up with someone to get over Benson’ plan.
“I’ve never seen a man’s eyes burn right through someone before.” Jo threw her head back and laughed. “It was so obvious that Benson was jealous.”
“Or maybe you were seeing things,” Carrie murmured, unwilling to believe it.
She couldn’t entertain a dream of having a relationship with Benson.
Mostly because Carrie didn’t believe in relationships anymore. She’d only end up alone in the end—why not keep her heart protected so it hurt less when the inevitable breakup happened?
Sky tapped her feet on the floor. “I know you guys met under… unconventional circumstances,” she said softly. “But maybe you should give Bens
on a chance.”
“A chance to what?” Carrie frowned.
“To see if what you have is real.”
“It’s just sexual.” Carrie huffed. “Overactive hormones. Empty-bed-syndrome. That’s it.”
“What if it’s not?” Jo snagged a brownie.
“That’s not an option.”
“So what are you going to do?” Jewel asked.
“Maybe I should quit.”
Jo barked out a laugh. “Why would you punish yourself like that? Even if it isn’t your dream, you love Hidden Reef. I haven’t seen you that passionate about anything since… well, ever.”
The bell over the door rang.
The women glanced up and stared at the customer who shuffled in. For a moment, there was silence.
Suddenly, Sky jumped over Jewel’s feet to get to the counter. “Hi, how can I help you?”
Jo, Jewel and Carrie tiptoed to the kitchen.
“I should run.” Jo checked her watch. “Tell Sky I’m gone?”
“We got it.” Carrie waved her away.
The door slapped behind Jo, leaving Carrie alone with Jewel. The shy girl squirmed and scratched her wrist. Carrie sensed her mounting discomfort and tried to calm her with a new conversation. “Do you like makeup?”
“Makeup?” A crease appeared between her brows.
“You know. Foundation. Highlighter. Contour.”
“Oh.” With a slight shake, Jewel admitted, “I don’t know much about that.”
Carrie dug into her purse. “Here.”
“What…?” Jewel stared at the tube. “Is it lip gloss?”
“I was a makeup-virgin like you. My parents were really strict about altering my natural beauty.” She hiked the tube up, forcing Jewel to grasp it. “You’re stunning by the way. I just want you to know that. You don’t need makeup, but gloss is a must have.”
A small, pleased smile grew on Jewel’s face. “Thank you.”
“No problem. If you ever become interested in makeup or just want some girl advice that those two heifers,” she jutted a finger at the door Jo had left through, “can’t offer, I’m here.” She nodded. “We dark-skin girls should stick together.”
Jewel dimpled.
Again, Carrie was struck by her stunning face. She could easily, easily make it as a commercial model if she had the inclination.
Sky entered the kitchen, her dark eyes gleaming. “What are you two smiling about?”
“Nothing,” Carrie and Jewel said at the same time.
“Fine, don’t tell me.” Sky walked to the sink and washed her hands. “Are you sticking around, Car?”
“Why?” she asked suspiciously.
“We could use extra hands to bake this—”
“I’m out!” Carrie threw a peace sign. “See you later!”
Sky laughed and Carrie cracked a smile as she left through the door.
It was another hot day in Belize City. Coconut trees waved their fronds like pom-poms. Blue skies stamped with fluffy clouds filled her sights.
She ambled to her car and got in. Moments like this, Carrie usually headed to Hidden Reef to catch up on paperwork and make sure all her ducks were in order.
But she was scared.
Scared to run into Benson.
Scared he’d tempt her again with his piercing eyes and muscled physique.
Scared…
She hit the steering wheel with the heel of her hand as anger flashed through her. Who the hell was Benson to have her cowering in her car, afraid to do something she enjoyed?
She didn’t even let her exes dictate her movements like this. If she went out with someone and discovered a restaurant or an ice cream flavor or even a position that she liked, Carrie had no qualms holding onto it and disregarding the associated memories.
If she wanted to go into work early, she would.
And if she wanted to kiss Benson, then she would.
It was purely physical anyway. Meant nothing at all. In fact, her obsession with him would disappear after they’d slept together a few times. All tigers had stripes, right? As soon as he did something stupid, she’d cut him off and move on.
No harm. No foul.
The idea grew on her, becoming more and more enticing. This was the twenty-first century. Who said that a girl had to be in love with every guy she had sex with?
Filled with new vigor, Carrie drove home, showered and took care to match her underwear. After pulling on a mini skirt and a silky button-down, she slipped her feet into heels and flat-ironed her hair so it was silky straight. A splash of gloss and some eyeliner was enough. She didn’t want to look like she was trying too hard.
Satisfied with the finished product, Carrie stopped at the store to purchase protection. Given the way Benson had her pinned against the wall on Saturday, he didn’t need a bed to do what had to be done.
The cashier handed over the paper bag. Carrie stuffed the stash in her purse. Stomach twisting into knots, she drove to Hidden Reef.
There were no other cars in the lot. Benson isn’t here yet.
She shrugged off the disappointment and headed inside. After hiding her purse in a drawer, she went through last weekend’s sales and made note of the most popular liquor brands.
Carrie was looking over the shift schedule when the doorknob creaked. Her heart jumped. She was too anxious to hide her expression so hope was written all over her face when the door swung in.
Heavy footsteps.
A man.
Benson?
Zeke popped his head into the room. “Hey, Carrie.”
“Hi.” She restrained a groan of disappointment. “What are you doing here so early?”
“Why? You expecting someone else?”
“No. Of course not.”
“You sure?” A wicked grin spread on his face. “Benson?”
Her cheeks warmed. “Benson? Why would you say that?”
“You two are messing, right?” Zeke wiggled his eyebrows.
“I don’t know what you’re—”
“Look, I’m not blind. I saw the way Benson was glaring at that guy you were with.”
Her jaw dropped. “You mean, Arnold?”
“That’s the one.” Zeke nodded. “Benson told me to take my time getting your guy friend his drinks.”
Carrie blinked. “You’re kidding.”
“At first I thought it was weird; telling me to ignore a customer. Then I saw you flirting with him and I figured Benson wanted me to tick Arnold off so he’d leave.”
Her lips tilted up. “Wow.”
“Benson’s not a half-bad guy. Although you’d be better off choosing me…”
“Goodbye, Zeke.”
He chuckled and ducked out of the room.
Carrie set her cheeks in her hands, staring at the blank wall across from her. So Benson hadn’t been as cool with Arnold’s presence as he’d appeared Saturday night.
The thought made her smile. Hard.
Filled with restless energy, she hopped out of her seat and strode to the bar. As she emerged from the hallway, she saw Benson striding in. He wore a simple grey Henley, jeans and sneakers. The T-shirt might as well have been a tuxedo the way he wore it so elegantly.
She rubbed her hands together. Benson had no idea what he’d just unleashed in her. For once, Carrie was going to be the one in control. No more begging for labels, no more expectations of monogamy and commitment.
Fun.
Temporary, carnal lust.
That’s all she’d focus on.
Benson swung his head her way when she walked over. She smiled at him, noting his stunned expression. The last time they saw each other, he’d kissed her socks off. He must have been expecting her to be all up in her feelings about that.
“Can I speak to you?” Carrie shot a glance at the waitresses filing in behind him. “In private?”
“Sure.”
She spun swiftly on her heels, leading him into the room off the stage where they kept boxes of junk, broken chairs and th
e Chinese folding screen that Jo used every time she snuck into Hidden Reef.
“What’s going on?” Benson asked, his gaze darting around the room. “Where are we?”
She sashayed past him and turned the lock. It closed with a click. “The only place we can be alone.” She pointed to the ceiling. “With no cameras.”
“You’re not going to… kill me, are you?”
She spun and saw the smirk on his lips. He was joking.
Carrie was about to wipe the smile off his handsome face. “I have two questions.”
“Go ahead.”
“Are you dating Seo Ah?”
“No.”
She nodded and walked around him, surveying his broad shoulders and long legs. She’d been on the right track with Arnold, except the romp she wanted wasn’t with a random man. At least, not anymore.
“You had another question,” Benson said, his voice dropping a tone.
She looked at him with a knowing smile. His breath hitched. She felt him coiling, uncertain, observing her like a majestic buck who knew it was about to be run over.
You have no idea…
She stopped in front of him. Pressed a kiss to his lips, eyes wide-open. “I want you.” Stepping back, she loosened the first button of her shirt. “Make love to me.”
14
“Make love to me.”
It wasn’t a question. Even if it was, Benson didn’t want to say no.
But he also didn’t want to say yes.
This frustrating Catch-22 was a Carrie Original. Everything—from her glossy, dark brown skin to her straight black hair and her come-hither brown eyes were a trap. And Benson was about to fall head-first, hook, line and sinker.
Yes…
No.
One side of his brain screamed that he should take her against the wall until her knees buckled. The other wanted more than a quickie in a dusty storage closet, more than an animalistic romp that ended when she pulled her skirt back up.
Run.
Stay.
He couldn’t choose. So he stood frozen while Carrie unbuttoned her shirt and revealed a lacy white bra that tipped the scales deep in the stay-and-taste-every-inch-of-her camp.
She glided to him, high heels clicking against the floor like the tick of a clock.
