by L. A. Fiore
Greyson brought me home. Having said out loud what I’d been thinking, and with the weight of the condoms in my pocket, the words just tumbled from my mouth. “Come to my house on Sunday. The foster monsters won’t be home.”
I felt his muscles tense. His head dipped so we were almost eye-to-eye. “Are you saying what I think you are?”
My gaze dropped as some of my bravado fled. I was talking about having sex with Greyson, to Greyson.
He touched my chin. “Alexis.”
“Paige gave me condoms.”
“So that’s what you two were talking about.” He trailed his finger along my jaw. “Are you a virgin?”
“Yes. Are you?”
I saw it in his eyes. He wasn’t. “No, but I wish I were for you.”
I didn’t know her, didn’t know him when he’d had sex with her and still I hated whoever came before me. I didn’t realize I said that out loud until he said, “I was sixteen. She was willing. If I knew I’d meet you, I would have waited.” He studied me a minute before he added, “We don’t have to.”
“I want to.”
His voice got all gravelly. “So do I.” I thought he was going to kiss me, but instead he laced his fingers through my hair and just stared, studying me like he had a tendency of doing. “Sunday.”
I waited to hear his bike drive off, and still I didn’t move. The foster monsters were in bed; I heard the television. I leaned back against the door and dreamily thought about sex with Greyson. My back went rod straight. I was having sex with Greyson on Sunday. I had to shower and shave and lotion. I ran upstairs and stripped, but I didn’t head to the shower. I stood in front of the full-length mirror. My breasts were very small, but my stomach was flat and my legs were long. Remembering that day at school and his seductively spoken words had goosebumps breaking out over my body. He was going to see me, all of me. I felt a bit nervous about that, despite his declarations, but I was going to see all of him too. I’d imagined his body countless times, but I’d be touching and tasting him. I knew the mechanics of sex, but actually doing it…maybe I should have talked to Paige.
I reached for my robe to cover myself. My thoughts shifted. This was a conversation I would have had with my mom. Sitting in my room, heads together as she gave me the talk. She’d be reluctant, her baby girl wasn’t a baby anymore, but it was a right of passage when a girl became a woman. Dad would greet Greyson at the door, looking stern. He wouldn’t know, but he’d suspect. He’d make small talk then warn Greyson if he broke my heart he’d kill him. And if I did have my heart broken, they’d be there to hold me…to heal me. The tears fell as yet another milestone came and went. They’d missed so much of my life, but I didn’t care where they were or why they left me. If they showed up on my doorstep tomorrow, I would welcome them with open arms.
“I love you, wherever you are.”
Collecting my toiletries, I headed to the shower.
I was going to throw up. I’d been up for hours. The foster monsters left, the house was empty, Greyson was due any minute. I wanted to have sex, wanted it to be with Greyson, but now that we were here I wasn’t sure I knew what to do. I wasn’t sure if I was pretty enough, sexy enough.
A knock at the door had my stomach dropping. Maybe I wasn’t ready for this. Pulling it open, I was surprised to see he looked how I felt. His eyes moved over my face then he smiled. “You’ve been up for hours too.”
Relieved that I wasn’t the only one, my shoulders unknotted. “Yeah.” Glancing behind him, I didn’t see his bike. “Where’s your bike?”
Sheepishly he confessed, “I parked on another street.”
It took a second, but if the twins saw it, they’d be over. That would be awkward.
He stepped inside; I locked the door. We didn’t move from the foyer. Grasping at anything to buy me a bit more time I blurted out, “Would you like something to drink?”
He shoved his hands into his pockets. “Water would be good.”
My stomach was jumping around; those butterflies were freaking out. My hands shook as I reached for a glass and filled it with water. I hadn’t heard Greyson follow me, so I almost dropped the glass when I turned to find him leaning against the doorjamb.
“We don’t have to do this, Alexis. We could go to the beach or take a ride.”
“I want to, I’m just afraid you’ll be disappointed.”
His expression turned fierce. “Disappointed? How the hell could I be disappointed?”
“I’m not curvy.”
Silenced followed and I grew more insecure.
“There’s a little beauty mark where your neck meets your shoulder. Do you know how often I find myself wanting to lick that spot?”
I might have been looking at him in wonder, but what a thing to say.
“Your hair is a palette of colors, chocolate to blonde and every color in between. It feels like silk. I love burying my hands in it, love it even more when I’m pulling you to me to kiss that mouth. Those lips, your taste. I’m fucking addicted to them.”
Now I was growing hot. I drank his water, the whole glass, to ease the burning.
“And your eyes.” He stepped closer, took the glass from me and put it on the counter. He didn’t touch me, but he moved so close that I could feel the heat from his body. “There’s sadness buried in them. It’s not as pronounced at times, but it’s always there. And still you find it in you to make up stories about a fetal pig, to dance during sixth period, to act the part of a drowning victim, to bake my grandfather a birthday cake.” His gaze moved over my face. “You could never disappoint me.”
The feeling the first day, the one that nearly knocked me over, I knew now what it was. Love. I never believed in love at first sight, but I was willing to admit when I was wrong. I got up on my tiptoes and touched my lips to his, the lightest of kisses. We weren’t touching, only our mouths, and it was so damn sweet.
I kissed him again, but this time I traced his lips with my tongue. His arms moved around me and pulled me tight against his body, one hand moved up my back to get lost in my hair; he tilted my head and kissed me deeper. The nerves fled, my tongue warring with his, eager for his taste, as addicted to him as he was to me. Edgy and needy I broke the kiss, reached for his hand and started for the stairs.
“Are you sure?”
That he even asked. “Yes.”
In my room, Greyson looked around at the books and journals; I had a lot. His focus lingered on the picture of Alice in Wonderland. I agreed with the Cat, we were all mad here.
“It suits you.”
My gaze drifted around my room. I never really thought about it, but it did. He closed the distance and wrapped my face in his hands. This time, he traced my lips. My mouth opened for his tongue. Goosebumps rose even as little fires sizzled under my skin. His palm closed over my breast, but I didn’t feel inadequate, I felt desired. He brushed his thumb over my nipple and my clit pulsed. Feeling bold, I fisted his shirt, yanked my mouth from his, and pulled it over his head. He was exquisite. Flattening my palms on his chest, I ran them down his body to his six-pack. His sharp inhale turned the pulsing between my legs into an ache.
“You’re beautiful,” I whispered.
“My turn.” My shirt followed his. He palmed my breasts and even with the cotton between us, that ache between my legs turned to a throbbing. He ran his tongue along my collarbone, kissed the swells of my breasts. With a twist of his fingers, my breasts spilled free. Nervousness pushed at the pleasure until his mouth replaced his hand, pulling my nipple between his teeth, touching the tip with his tongue. I had never felt anything so incredible until he sucked me into his mouth.
“Please don’t stop.”
He squeezed my breast, rolling my nipple between his fingers while he sucked on the other. The throbbing became painful. His hand drifted down my stomach before finding the part of me aching for him. He touched my clit and pleasure shot down my spine. One finger slipped into me, pulling a moan.
He withdrew his fi
nger, his eyes worried. “Did I hurt you?”
“No.” I covered his hand with my own and guided him back. “Please.”
He played with my clit, my hips responding to his touch. He slid one finger in, circling me on the inside. I bit my lip at the sensation that was like nothing I’d ever felt. He watched me; seeming to enjoy the pleasure he was giving. Another finger joined the first, curling inside me. My head dropped as the knot in my gut loosened; climbing to a climax I wanted so badly to reach. He pressed his thumb to my clit and I came apart. Chills raced down my arms and light exploded behind my closed lids. Greyson wrapped his arm around my waist, holding me up, as he drew out the pleasure.
“That was fucking hot,” he whispered in my ear.
He brought the fingers that had been inside me to his mouth and licked my taste off.
That was fucking hot.
He dropped to his knees and pulled my sweats and panties off. Pressing a kiss between my legs, his tongue running through my folds. My fingers dug into his shoulders because holy shit that felt good.
“Maybe you should get on the bed for this part.” He looked up at me with the hottest eyes. He walked me backwards until the bed hit my legs. I sat. He curled his hand around my nape and he kissed me as he lowered me onto the bed. Kissing down my body, spending some time on my breasts, he spread my legs wider, got on his knees and buried his face between them.
I practically came off the mattress. He tongued my clit, sucked on it, moved his head from side to side before thrusting his tongue inside me. I fisted the sheets as my hips jerked into his mouth, moving with him. He sucked on my clit and pushed two fingers into me and I was a goner. Every part of me felt that orgasm. I was exhausted when it finally subsided, but he was just getting started. Greyson dropped his jeans and briefs and that ache was back. I’d never seen a cock in real life, never thought they were particularly attractive, but I was wrong. His was long, thick and bent slight at the top. I wanted to touch it, taste it. I wasn’t sure why I was so bold, but after what he’d just done to me, I wanted to give a little of that back. I sat up, ran a finger along the vein that was popping up. My eyes lifted to his, but they were closed. I closed my hand around the base and he moaned. It was silky smooth and hard as a rock. I traced the veins with my finger again then I did it with my tongue.
“I’ll come if you do that.”
I wanted to taste him like he had me. I wanted to pull him into my mouth and make him lose control.
He read my mind when he said, “First time I come, I want to be inside you.”
Inside me. Yes, I liked this idea.
He rolled on a condom then settled between my legs. “It’s going to hurt.”
I pulled his mouth to mine. Kissing him was like a drug. Every part of my body went loose. He rubbed himself over me, lifted my hips and surged forward filling me in one long stroke. Holy shit it hurt. My body tensed. He froze.
“I’m sorry.”
I reached for him, though I wasn’t sure if I wanted to pull him close or push him away. He sucked on my lower lip. That felt nice. His mouth settled over mine for a kiss that slowly turned the pain into pleasure. I raised my hips and he sank deeper; we both moaned. Deliberately he created the friction that had lust curling in my gut. I ran my hands down his body to his ass, drawing him closer as I sought more of him. The pleasure built, my body tingled and my breath stilled right before the most incredible sensation exploded inside me, like I was floating and shattering apart all at once. His muscles went taut right before he drove in deep and closed his eyes. My name rolled off his tongue in a sexy whisper.
He dropped his head on my shoulder. We were both breathing heavy. “Is it always like that?”
He brushed his thumb across my cheek. “No.”
I wanted to protest when he pulled out; I missed the connection to him. I assumed he went to clean up, disappearing into the bathroom. I loved having a naked Greyson walking around my room. He was beautiful. I stared my fill when he returned.
“Like what you see?”
“Very much.”
Remembering his mouth on me, I wanted to taste him.
“You don’t have to ask.”
My eyes jerked to his face. He was smiling.
“How do you know what I’m thinking?”
“You’re looking at my cock like a lollipop.”
I shifted to my knees. “I’ve never…”
“Feel free to practice on me.”
I didn’t chuckle at his comment because I was distracted. I touched his stomach, running my fingers down his abs. His muscles moved under my touch. I traced the tip of his cock with my finger. He moaned. I traced it again with my tongue.
“Fuck, Alexis.”
I closed my mouth around him. His body tensed, his fingers twisted into my hair, like he was holding himself up. I ran my tongue along the length of him, sucked, swirled it over the tip. His thigh muscles were like granite, as he held himself still while I explored him. The throbbing between my legs made me even bolder. I tongued the tip, fisted the base and stroked him up and down his shaft. He grew hard, his hips started to move. I felt him lose control before he thrust into my mouth. My eyes watered as he pushed into the back of my throat, but I held on because feeling this boy lose control was incredible.
“I’m going to come. If you don’t—”
I sucked harder. His salty taste filled my mouth, a strange sensation, but I’d brought him to that. I’d made him lose control. I swallowed.
He yanked me up his body, his eyes on fire, before he kissed me.
Greyson
Alexis moved around the kitchen in pajamas that had ice cream cones all over them. They were almost as ugly as her bike, so why was I having a problem keeping from getting hard. She’d pulled her hair up into a knot, exposing that beauty mark that drove me nuts. I’d just spent the last two hours worshipping her body and I wanted more.
She was making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. We’d worked up an appetite.
“Can you get the plates? They’re in the cabinet over the dishwasher.”
I padded across the linoleum floor. I tried not to think about her home because it pissed me off. There was nothing warm about it because there was nothing of her in it. Her asshole foster parents didn’t even have her picture on the wall.
I turned to find her watching me, her focus on my chest. I’d only tugged on my jeans. She was so easy to read and since I was feeling the same, I moved into her and caught her bottom lip between my teeth, sinking in enough to make it hurt. Her eyes glazed over and it was tempting to pull her onto the kitchen table. I controlled that.
I took the sandwiches, she got us water, and we went back to the only room in the house I liked. Alexis was stamped all over it, from the books piled in the corners, the posters of The Cure, Alice in Wonderland and the cat in a precarious position that stated Hang in There, to her bookcase stuffed with journals that I knew were filled with her stories. She was in every inch of this room. I fucking loved this room.
We settled on the bed across from each other sitting cross-legged. She took a bite from her sandwich, but her focus was still on my chest. “Do you work out?” Her expressive face changed realizing she’d asked that out loud. She then shrugged and added, “You have a six pack. How did you get that?”
She was making me hard with nothing more than a look, but what a fucking look. “I’m ready to go again whenever you are.”
Her eyes flew to my face then she smiled. I’d lost interest in my sandwich. There was something so much sweeter within reach. I put my plate on the table then moved toward her. Her eyes went wide, then heated.
“I swim.”
She was thinking about what was coming, so she didn’t acknowledge me. She put her plate on her bedside table then settled back on her bed. I crawled over her, covering her body with my own. She was beautiful, so fucking beautiful, but those sad eyes tore at my heart.
“Why the sadness behind your eyes?”
Surprise
shifted to pain when her eyes brightened. I felt like a dick. “I’m sorry.”
“No, I wasn’t expecting the conversation to go there.” She reached into her nightstand and pulled out a picture. I settled next to her, taking it when she offered it. Her parents, she looked just like her mom. Alexis was only a toddler, adorable, happy, no sadness in her eyes. There was a hard edge to her dad, the man had seen and done things, but there was no denying the love for his girls. I’d had countless pictures like this with my parents; even losing them, I had albums of memories. This was Alexis’ only memory.
Her voice was distant, like she was lost in that memory. “I don’t know what happened to them. I don’t know why they gave me up. There’s love in that picture. They loved me, but they didn’t keep me. I don’t understand that. And even being angry and hurt, I miss them and I don’t even remember them.”
I wiped away her tears. She took the picture and put it back in the drawer. It broke my heart that she kept it close and for how worn it was, she looked at it often.
“Are you going to look for them?”
“Yes.”
“You look just like your mom.”
Her smile was shaky. I moved over her again, closed the distance and kissed her. For the next few hours I tried really hard to take that sadness from her gaze.
Alexis was working until closing; Paige was driving her home. I had the whole night, so I pulled out the canvas I’d been working on and my paints. That first day when I felt her on the beach, I knew she was special but I hadn’t appreciated how special. These last few months getting to know her, I wasn’t ready to let her go. We rang in the New Year. Our time was coming to an end. I was leaving, there was no changing that, and she wanted NYU. We had plans that didn’t include the other and yet for the first time in my life I wanted something more than I wanted my art. I owed it to my grandfather, to my parents, to myself to pursue my dream, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t going to miss her like hell.
Nigel surprised us with a visit; it was where Grandfather was now, the two of them were hitting the town. He brought with him the files for Alexis. I loved that she wanted to look into our family. It was a link we’d always have, whatever happened between us.
