by L. A. Fiore
A tear rolled down his cheek. Instinct was to wipe it away. I fisted my hand instead. “That day on the jetty when I looked up and saw you, your hair flying in the breeze, clutching that beat-up bike of yours, it damn near knocked the breath from me. My life changed that day. And the night you were shot, my world tilted again. I can still see it, every time I close my eyes. The pain, when I thought you were gone, it haunts me. Leaving you, tearing us apart, that haunts me too. I’ve loved you from the very first moment I saw you.”
I hated seeing him hurt, hated that more than the anger I held onto. And I loved him; that trumped everything else. “You broke us. You have to fix it.”
Tenderness moved into his expression. “That I can do.”
“Is it true?” Dylan said the following morning, slamming into my bedroom like he owned it. “You took Greyson back?”
News traveled fast.
“I didn’t take him back…” Yet. “We’re working it out.”
“Where is he? I’d like to talk to him,” Dominic added.
“You’re smiling,” Dylan accused.
“That should be a good thing. You know as well as I do why he left.”
Dylan got in my face. “He left you, moved out of your apartment and your life.”
“I know. And I also know he loves me and was afraid for me. Dylan, some crazy stalker shot me.”
“I’m not feeling as generous.”
“And I get it, but we’ve all known each other too long to not give him a second chance.”
“Grant is going to flip the fuck out.”
Yes he was, but when he got over the anger I was sure we’d all find our way back. I hoped.
“I’m with Dylan and Dominic. I’m not feeling as generous.” Grant paced his living room. Paige and the girls didn’t share the sentiment. Like me, they were ready to move forward.
“I understand why he left, but he fucking left,” Grant hissed.
“You would have to.”
He had no argument for that.
“He acted poorly, Grant, but his intentions have always been in Alexis’ best interest,” Paige argued. “He had his reasons.”
“Fuck his reason.”
“I need you to try, Grant. You’re my family, but so is he. Please.”
Grant turned to me, the emotions that chased each other, one after another, was hard to watch. “He hurt you, he broke you. I’ll listen to him, but I can’t promise I’ll forgive him.”
It hurt to hear, but I nodded my head. What else could I do?
It had been two days since I’d seen Greyson and for a man who wanted me back he was taking his time making it right. And I wanted him to make it right and quickly. It was a new kind of torture being so close to him and not getting to touch him, kiss him…it had been almost a year.
I had to get back to work, but I was running errands. Passing the diner, I thought to pop in and say hi when I heard the sound of a motorcycle coming down the street.
Greyson. The last time I saw his motorcycle was in New York, his bike from when we were kids. He still had it; kept it in perfect condition. He rarely rode it in the city; so seeing him on the back of it again was a really nice sight. He was older, but I still saw the Greyson of our youth, the boy who had stolen my heart. It wasn’t hard to see why. He pulled over, his bike idling, his focus on me.
“Take a ride with me?”
My heart twisted in my chest because we hadn’t been on a ride in so long. I didn’t need to think about it. He handed me the helmet. I climbed on. Like when we were kids, I wrapped him tightly in my arms. It all came back, the feelings, the memories and the dreams. I rested my cheek on his back and we rode. We had no destination in mind; we just rode. I wanted to know where he’d been, what he’d been doing for the last year and why he'd come back now. We’d get there. For now, I just enjoyed the ride.
Greyson
My girl was on the back of my bike, holding me tight like she used to. The emptiness was gone, the numbness. She breathed life back into me with nothing more than being. I had taken a year from us, a year we’ll never get back. I needed to atone for that but right now my girl was on the back of my bike, the wind in our faces and nothing but blue skies ahead. So we rode and remembered.
Alexis
It was cleaning day and for the first time in almost a year, I was blaring my music and singing along. I could be offended because my animals were burying their heads in the sofa. Did I really sound like an animal dying? The memory brought a smile.
They looked pathetic, so I let the dogs out. Buggers would have to deal. I opened the back door to find the spiral ring of Greyson’s on the stoop. The one he was never without in our youth, the one he used as leverage to get me to marry him.
I sat down and ran my hand over the cover as memories drifted in and out. Inside, the sketches were each more beautiful than the last. He had sketches of the beach, of the locals going about their days; sketches of the town, concept buildings and cars but the last dozen or so were all sketches of me as a teenager. The one I remembered he did the night we walked to the jetty that first time. There were a few others of me working, one I was at my locker and in writing club. There was a sketch of me sleeping after The Cure concert. He hadn’t slept; he had drawn me even as tired as he had been. There was also a sketch of me standing on the front path of my house watching as Greyson left for the last time. But it was the last sketch that brought the tears. It was our wedding day. Greyson had sketched me as we spoke our vows. But what had the tears streaming down my cheeks, what had my heart swelling with love, was the date. He had captured every detail of that beautiful memory from eleven years earlier just yesterday. Underneath the sketch were five words, the same five words I had engraved on his wedding band.
My heart is within you
I pressed the notebook to my chest, holding it like the gift it was, and acknowledged what I’d always known. He hadn’t broken us; he’d just bent us.
Greyson
I’d called Alexis earlier, wanted to take her somewhere, anywhere, but she was working. I loved that she was. Like her dad had said, she was moving on. Despite the pain, she kept moving forward. Strength, yeah, she had it in spades. I had some things to do, part of my campaign to win her back though she was making that very easy on me. She didn’t have to, but I was so fucking glad she was. I told her I’d call her later. I actually watched the clock and felt a bit like my younger self, wondering if it was too early to call. At nine, I couldn’t wait anymore. She answered on the first ring.
“Greyson.”
“Hey, beautiful. How did the writing go?”
“I wrote three chapters, over ten thousand words. I’m thrilled.”
“You found your words.”
Softly she said, “I did.”
Hearing the tenderness in her voice had the words just tumbling out. “I was scared. So fucking scared of losing you. I couldn’t see straight, just saw you that night. Watching you struggling to find your way back and then to learn I was somehow connected to it. I fucked up, Alexis.”
Silence followed. My heart was slamming in my chest. What was she thinking?
“That Ratcliffe stubbornness,” she finally said and I practically wept. My girl. I didn’t fucking deserve her.
“I’m a stubborn asshole.”
“I thought you were accommodating.”
I chuckled.
“I went to see my dad.”
I knew this and still I tensed because that had been a risk.
“I know.”
“How do you know?”
“Your father paid me a visit in Ireland.”
Silence again and when she did speak, I could hear the tears in her voice. “He did?”
“Told me I was wrong to leave. That he was wrong to leave.”
“He said that?”
“Yes.” As soon as we made it right, I’d give her his letters. They were going to hurt her before they brought her comfort. She was dealing with enough pain from me.
> She chuckled, “Maybe I got through.”
“What did you say to him?”
“I told him to go fuck himself for leaving.”
“You did not.”
“I did.”
“What did he say?”
“I didn’t stick around long enough to hear his thoughts. It was very cathartic. Do you think he’ll try to reconcile?”
“I think your dad is a very complicated man, but yes I think a time is coming when you won’t have to look at that picture to see him.”
I heard her weeping softly and I wanted to drop the fucking phone and go to her, but I hadn’t earned that right yet. This was on her terms.
“I imagine you have some choice words for me too.”
“You hurt me, Greyson. I understand, I truly do understand where your head was at, but you hurt me.”
“However you need me to make this right, I’ll do it.”
Silence again.
“What are you wearing?”
Fuck, I loved this woman. Our brand of phone sex, I got comfortable on the bed. “Leather chaps and a cowboy hat.”
She yawned before asking, “Do you have a lasso?”
“Yes, but it’s all tangled around my ankles and my ass is fucking freezing. What are you wearing?”
“My flannel pajamas and my grannie panties since I need to do laundry.”
“What color are your grannie panties?”
“White cotton, tight elastic around the waist, but a bit saggy at the legs and it covers past my belly button. And my pjs cover me from neck to toe, long sleeves. I’m very proper. Oh, I suppose I should tell you I’ve another man sleeping in my bed, two actually.”
“What, now?”
“Buggers has taken your side of the bed. And I have two dogs. Benny and Joon. You’ll have to meet them.”
My heart ached. Even broken she had love in her to bring dogs into her life.
She added, “You’ll have to sleep in Buggers’ bed.”
She didn’t know what those words meant to me, but I felt on top of the fucking world because she was already talking about me being back in her home and her heart. To her I teased, “Fuck no.”
“See, there’s that accommodating nature of yours.”
“Alexis.”
“Yeah.”
“I love you.”
She didn’t miss a beat. “I know.”
Alexis
The following day while I was doing the dreaded laundry there was a knock at the door. Thinking it was Greyson had the butterflies flapping around in my stomach. I was two years shy of forty and yet I moved like a teenager to the door, stopping myself before opening it so I could calm down and not look like I’d just run to the door.
I was disappointed to find it wasn’t Greyson on the other side of it, but that didn’t last long when the courier handed me a note on stationery I remembered.
Join me for the evening? If yes, tell the courier. I’ll pick you up at seven. If no, that’s the wrong answer.
I smiled; I had missed his humor.
“Please tell him yes.”
I closed the door and leaned back against it. I couldn’t stop the smile. I had a date with Greyson. I had to shower and shave and lotion. I ran to my room feeling much like I had at sixteen.
At seven there was a knock at the door. We’d been married, lived together, knew each other better than any two people could and still my hands went damp and my stomach flipped with nerves.
I pulled the door open on Greyson looking as nervous as I felt. He was actually rubbing his hands on his jeans. He turned to me and those eyes took their time moving down my body. On cue, goosebumps rose.
“You’re beautiful.”
As many times as I’ve heard that, it never got old. I looked past him to the limo sitting in the street.
“We’re taking that?”
He glanced over his shoulder then looked at me from the corner of his eye. Sexy as sin, made more so when he grinned. “I’m trying to woo my girl.”
His girl. My eyes burned. I was his girl. Always had been.
He didn’t take my hand, but touched my elbow as he led us to the car. I missed holding his hand.
“I thought we’d do dinner first,” he suggested.
“Okay.” I assumed he meant at the diner. I was wrong. Sitting on the bar in the limo was a hot fudge sundae and two spoons. He settled next to me and like he had done once before, he spooned up some whipped cream and offered it. And like then, he removed the excess with his thumb.
Chills danced down my arms and not because of the ice cream.
“Where are we going?”
“Dancing.”
Lust took a backseat to suspicion. “A plastic bag caught in a tree has more control than I have when dancing.”
He chuckled at the memory. “I think dancing is much like laundry. You just don’t have the right experience.”
Damn, it got hot in here all of a sudden remembering his lesson on doing laundry.
He knew what I was thinking when he smiled and called to the driver. “Could you put the air on?”
The club was packed with bodies pressed together and the music so loud the bass throbbed through you. Greyson led me through the bodies, his hand on the small of my back, which was causing my insides to go haywire. He didn’t search out a table; he led us right to the dance floor. He turned into me, his hands found my hips and he drew me close, so close we were touching. I bit my lip to stifle the moan. The beat was a fast one, but Greyson took his time, looking me right in the eyes as he moved in a way that could only be described as making love, fully dressed, but he was seducing me right there on the dance floor. Having been denied him for so long, I let myself be seduced. His hands moved over my body, relearning, remembering. I touched him too, starting at his shoulders and slowly moving down his muscled arms. My fingers dug into his biceps when he palmed my back and drew me even closer. His hips moved, mine moved with him. I felt him against my stomach as heat pooled between my legs. Edgy and needy I ran my hands around his back and down over the curve of his ass. I wanted to kiss him, wanted his mouth on mine and his taste on my tongue. I wanted to drink him in until I was sated. We didn’t kiss; we didn’t talk, not with words. Our bodies were saying plenty. We spent the night in that spot, no one else existed. It was just he and I. The ride home was so wrought with sexual tension, the driver had to feel it. I wanted to crawl into Greyson’s lap, wanted to straddle him, wanted to rub myself against him, wanted his hands and mouth on me; I wanted his cock inside me. He felt it too; his fingers were curled into fists but he kept his distance.
At my door, he gave in to the need to touch me and ran his finger along my jaw.
“I’d like you to meet Benny and Joon.” Dylan had taken them for a walk when Greyson arrived earlier, but they’d be home now.
“I’d like that.”
I unlocked the door and they were waiting. Usually, they were well behaved with visitors, but as soon as I opened the door they were jumping up on Greyson and with enough force it knocked him back a few feet. It wasn’t aggression. Like me, it was love at first sight.
“Benny, Joon come.”
“They’re beautiful,” Greyson said.
“Benny is the bigger one, my big boy, and Joon is his sister.”
Greyson was rubbing their heads when his focus shifted to something behind us. Buggers came strolling into the room as only a cat could. He assessed the situation and recognizing Greyson he beelined to him and rubbed up against his leg.
“It looks like even Buggers is welcoming you home.”
He looked over at me. “Am I welcomed home?”
I held his gaze. “I never wanted you to leave.”
He reached for me in the same move he slammed the front door closed with his foot. His mouth came down on mine. His taste saturated my tongue. My hands moved up his arms and over his shoulders, into his hair pulling him closer so I could kiss him deeper. Teeth, lips and tongues devoured. I couldn’t taste him
enough. He yanked off my shirt. His hand moved over my body then stilled when he touched my scar. He broke the kiss, his fingers tracing it. They were shaking. He curled his spine and pressed a kiss on it, his lips lingered before he turned me around so he could kiss the one on my back. I felt his tears on my skin. I turned to him, took his face in my hands.
“I lived,” I whispered the words he had said once to me.
He kissed me, sweetly at first but all the passion that had been banked demanded release. My bra followed my shirt. His mouth closed over my breast. Chills shot down my arms as I pulled at his shirt. I needed to feel him. He yanked his shirt off. I pressed hot kisses over his chest, his hand curled in my hair as I kissed down his body. We moved into the bedroom never breaking contact. My fingers shook as I worked on his jeans, pulling the denim and briefs down his legs. Slowly, I moved my hands back up his legs, across his hips. Wrapping my hand around his cock, I fisted. He moaned. I took just the tip into my mouth, swirling around the slit, tasting the saltiness. He lifted me, my back hit the mattress and he followed me down. He kissed me, not crazed like the first kiss, deeper, slower, like he was savoring the moment, savoring me. His hand moved down my body, touching and claiming. It all came back. Not just the sex, but the connection. The bond that formed when we were kids and only grew stronger in the years that followed. I didn’t realize I was crying because I wasn’t sad. I was overwhelmed with being here again; every kiss, every touch breathing life back into the dream I thought had died.
“Alexis?”
“It isn’t just love.”
He brushed his thumb over my cheek.
“You’re in my blood and bones. Losing you, it wasn’t just losing the dream. It was losing a piece of me. All the times I reached for the phone to call you. You are my husband, but you’re my best friend too. I’ve been empty; so desperately empty without you.”
A tear rolled down his cheek. I pulled his mouth to mine and kissed him with everything I was feeling. His fingers dug into my thighs to lift my hips. I broke the kiss when he pulled me onto his cock, filling me so completely. More tears, I had missed this. Our eyes locked as we moved, it had been a long time but our bodies remembered. We moved in sync reaching for that peak and when we came, it was together.
