Kehko turned to shout, “Turkey!” to Zhuel’s renewed shouts of, “Gobble-gobble, Keke!” and Rosa’s good natured laughter, even if she winced with every bellowed turkey noise. Without fail, Tohkrii burst out giggling. The little pumpkin pie of a babe started to topple, he was so overcome with the sillies, his Daddums catching him before he could fall. Tarnk brought several large black gourd looking balls that worked for fill in pumpkins in a pinch. This would be their second year carving them. My nose crinkled at the sickly sweet smell, but those suckers made the best mock pumpkin pies I’d ever tasted, nothing to sweeten it up required.
Joanie came up a short while later. I paused at the puffiness around her eyes. She looked like she’d been crying. Rek, following her up to storm right past her when she stopped to join our group, stomped away with a snarling huff, sending snow flying in his wake.
“What get him?” Khri asked, coming up on the other side of me to wedge his way in, so I had a mate on either side of me.
Rosa looked like she wanted to ask but Joanie began making up some silly story about getting lost, and then one of the kids eventually required their mama’s attention, effectively giving Joanie an out. She reeked of the stinky plant that grew near the edge of the woods. Khri smelled like it sometimes when he came back from a hunt and had yet to wash. They dried the weed out, ground it up into a fine powder, using it to mask their smells from whatever they might be hunting. “Pine, man,” Joanie muttered, “that stuff’s a menace. Right?”
“She’s sensitive to it,” Rosa agreed, though she looked like she wanted to pry.
“You okay?” I asked as Rosa and her brood went to find seating and my guys left me with Joanie to rustle up some grub. Daisy, a Charlie Brown lover, was waiting with her mates, excited to tell all the kiddies gathering in their own makeshift, home-made costumes, all about The Great Pumpkin.
“Never been better.” Of course, Joanie lied. I just gave her a look.
Knowing she probably wasn’t going to answer, I walked up to her, and wrapped an arm around her in a pseudo hug. “When you’re ready,” I murmured softly.
“Thanks, pumpkin butt, you’re a pal,” she teased, a hint of her over the top, jovial self coming back. With one last sniffle and a laugh, she tossed me a wink. Resting her head on my shoulder, her arm loosely going to my waist, she muttered through the corner of her mouth, “Now, let's talk about all that furry hotness you got under one roof with Boog man and Grumpy Grunts. Whoo-honey, it’s no surprise to anyone you got preggers almost right away. My ovaries are on fire just thinking about it. I’ve heard some stories, girl, some folks don’t know how to knock and walked in on some Pumpkin sandwiches full of meat, extra mayo, kinda raunchiness.”
“Please with the stoppings,” Boog garbled out, staring at Joanie like he was seriously contemplating where her off button might be and who he should ask to try and press it.
“No talk loves,” Khri grumbled, giving Joanie the stink eye. They weren’t embarrassed, more afraid the tales might get around and generate interest. We had no plans to add to our happy threesome mating.
My arm around her shoulder lifted and I gave her a gentle head slap. “Oh, Joans, I have to agree with Rosie on this one. You are so fucking weird. Call me crazy as you, but I love ya anyway, Jo.”
Joanie laughed and we settled into a comfortable silence. “Seriously, Mal, where have you been all our lives?”
“Being tortured by your not-cousin?” My smile was brittle, words clipped, but my eyes were smiling.
“I love you too, you spooky haired bitch,” she replied softly.
“I know,” I quipped, making her cackle out a laugh.
Bauheg and Khri, antsy with my pregnancy this far along they hovered incessantly, could hold out no longer and made to approach. Boog reached us first, holding out two plates Khri had gone off quickly to acquire and came back to hand off to go get drinks, one piled high to share with me, and one, to my delight, for Joanie. “Thank you, baby,” I told him sweetly, grinning as Joanie glanced between us in surprise.
“Oh, wow. Hey, thanks, boog-man,” she said as she took the offered food.
“He’s a total sweetie,” I gushed, to Boog’s happy rumbling at the praise. “They both are.”
“Khri not sweet,” Khri said as he came up, but handed a wooden cup to me, then Joanie. Grunting at Boog to let him know he could go and get another plate if he wished, my warrior mate sidled up to me until our sides were brushing.
“You’re sweet to me and a right grump to everyone else,” I reminded him. “Just the way I like it.” Gesturing between my males with my cup of tea, I blew them a noisy kiss. “The sweet to temper my sour.”
Khri’s grin was wicked, promised mating delights I’d be collecting on later swimming in those dark blue depths.
Joanie made a gagging noise, “And now that I’m done torturing everyone and I’ve made an appearance, that’s totally my cue to leave.” Taking a long drink of their grog, as I liked to call the fermented fruity drink Zhuiii held out to her, she smacked her lips and shook her head. “All this mushy gushy love shit is making me nauseous.”
When I realized she was literally leaving the festival, I called out to her as he drained both her cups, putting them in the bin for community dishes, and began the trek back to her place, “Leaving so soon, Joans?”
“Yeah. Not really feeling it tonight. Catch up with my bitches later, though. Mwah!” She waved a hand over her head. “Gonna eat this fine looking grub here, then call it a night. Borrowed some smut from Rosie that looks promising. Tell ya about it later.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I called back.
“Snoochie boochies, pumpkin buns!” Joanie gave a little butt wiggle.
“Romance with sex in it is not smut, you uncultured swine!’ Rosa called out over the din. “It’s as it should be, well balanced literature!”
“Hear-hear!” Kirch called out from across the way, yellow eyes bright. His thick, wild mane, haloing his head, was full of leaves his son and daughter were having fun stuffing into the wild mass of hair. Mina laughed, her arms full of furry toddler, their first to conk out for the night. The little one in her yellow-eyed mate’s arms didn’t even flinch, busy in his leaf stuffing work, despite his father’s bellowed out cheer. Vek, standing beside them, dutifully held out a fat stack of leaves for his kiddies to make full use of. Tarnk and Bia, watching the whole thing, commenting on it as they stood idly by, offering the kids suggestions, flanking their female, grinned in amusement.
Joanie laughed but continued on, until I could no longer see her retreating back. Turning to find Boog with a similar look on his face like the one that felt like it was pinching at mine, concerned disapproval and worry, he caught me studying him and let out a harsh grunt. “Rek no good for Joansie,” he blurted. “Need ‘nother male. Better male. Rektal no good.
“Bad male,” Khri agreed.
But would Joanie agree? “It’s not really our place to say,” I responded softly, grimacing at the idea of Joanie turning down a good male waiting for Rek to get his head out of his scuzzy butt.
Sugar & Spice
I couldn’t stop crying–happy tears. I wasn’t the only misty-eyed one in the room either.
“Boo-tiful,” Khri crooned, cradling the furriest of our two daughters. She was a tiny little albino miniature Lo denaii, but for the tufts of orange in a downy soft fur coat. Callie, I’d wanted to name her, but seeing as the guys couldn’t pronounce their child’s chosen name to save their lives, they called her Kitty. Bianca, her larger sibling, Binc, per my mates, was a human Yeti hybrid in every sense. Her ears were human sized but shaped like a Lo denaii’s, her nose long, wide, and flat, her features more striking with the pale, barely there layer of fur covering her body. Her skin was much paler than a human’s but darker than a Lo denaii’s.
Where Callie had smidges of orange here and there, and was more human featured in the face, her sister was completely white furred, a thick mop of it atop her head, my
snow white princess to her sister’s calico. The one thing the girls shared from me, their green eyes. I was so smitten with them, I couldn’t stop staring at them. Exhausted as I was, I was fighting to keep my eyes open just to watch them sleep. Leaning into Boog as he fussed over Binc’s blanket, he grinned as he glanced down at me. A long, happy sigh left me.
“Boog’ Pumpkin needs sleep,” he murmured, leaning down to press a kiss to my forehead. “Lots work, pretty babies birthing. Mally-mine needs the sleepings.”
“Not just yet,” I said on a yawn. “Soon, but not just yet. A few more minutes and I will.”
“Bootiful,” Khri said again, but he wasn’t looking at Kitty this time.
“Hardly,” I chuckled out, giving up to snuggle down better against the pillow behind me and slowly let my eyes shut, “but thank you.”
Twin happy rumbling purrs had me smiling, then grinning when they amped up at that tip of my lips. “Love you, so damn much.”
“MINE,” they both rumbled out, followed by simultaneous, “Loves yous,” that had me falling asleep with the goofiest grin on my face.
This had all started out with some Yeti-burgling and one nosy neighbor who just couldn’t let it go... This Pumpkin bride was happier than my ass in a warehouse full of peanut butter cups. I wouldn’t trade this new life I called mine or my mates and the life we were building for anything. That fateful Hallow’s Eve was the best trick turned treat, wild birthday, I’d ever had, and considering my crazy mates and our life now, that was saying something.
I was happy. I was loved. I had all the pea-not butter cookies I could want... dark side approved. All these years of wandering, lost, I’d found my home.
Yep. Still here. Not quite done yet...
Read on for an extended epilogue with a lead-in—a hint of a peek, a glimpse, if you will— of Bride of Chance, Joanie’s story, the fourth installment in the Brides of the Hunt series.
A knock at the door had me glancing up. Today I was cooking bihta beans, which while they tasted lovely, smelled like a skunk’s butt bubbling away in the cook pot. I had the door propped open to help ventilate our happy little hut.
“Uhm, yes?” I asked the harried male staring at me impatiently from the doorway.
Rek was looking positively, well, wrecked. “She nowhere.”
Blinking, I paused, about to spoon another mouthful of strained greens into Binc’s mouth. Her little hands reached for the spoon but I held it aloft. Reaching for the spare spoon I kept next to her feeding chair, I was one step ahead of her, dropping the extra baby spoon down in front of her before she could protest having nothing to bang on the wooden tray Khri had made extra thick with her in mind. Tiny claws extended and raked down the heavy wood as she growled out her want of lunch, but it would take her a while to work her way through this one.
“What do you mean, she’s nowhere,” I blurted, surprised.
“Joanie! Gone. She gone.” Rek was freaking the hell out, panting heavily, babbling, switching from English to Lo denaii. His eyes were wild, hair puffed up around his head from where he’d been grabbing at it and pulling. He was completely panicked at the idea, absurd as it was.
My eyes narrowed. “Since when do you care, you know, being busy with-” I couldn’t even say it and really wasn’t interested in talking to him at all after what he’d done, but he’d said Joanie was missing. “Because you’re so busy and all with your bullshit and don’t have time for her anymore,” I added diplomatically. “Mm. I forget. What was that timid thing you brought back’s name? Mary Sue...? Suzy Q? I can never quite remember...”
“Jojo... Jojo... SHE! GONE!” he roared, like he thought I just wasn’t getting the picture.
Khri came stalking in from the back as a sharp gasp left me and I jumped at Rek’s outburst. Callie and Binc, waiting for their turn for a spoonful of yumminess, froze, then hunched. Starting to fuss, they strained to turn in their tray chairs and see what that loud male was doing behind them. One look at Rek in his home and Khri pulled his lips back in silent warning. “No yell Mally.”
“She gone,” Rek burst out, choking out the words, and then he spun around and ran from the house like a half wild Yeti man gone mad.
“Uhm...” I sputtered, gaping at his dramatic exit. Shit. He was completely and utterly losing his shit. A horrible feeling settled deep in the pit of my stomach.
“Who gone?” Boog asked, coming in with a bag of packed dung chips to fuel the stove just then. He added them to the heating rocks for a higher heat burn, collecting them from the grazing animals in the open fields. They were set out on slabs to dry out in the back. Boog was by all accounts a master chef, at least by my estimation. What was a little dung chips in the stove if it gave my meat a nice smoky flavor?
“Joanie,” I whispered, glancing between my mates worriedly. “He said she’s gone.”
“Gone-gone?” Khri cocked his head, a scowl marring his features.
Boog’s eyes slowly widened. “Portal open,” he blurted, and I joined him with the goofy bug-eyed looks.
“Oh. Oh no... Oh god.” My free hand went to my mouth. “No. She wouldn’t, would she?” My gaze darted between Khri and Boog.
“Joanie?!” Rek could be heard howling, bellowing out her name. “Rek no like this game! Joanie comes out now! Bad fe-” His voice choked and he croaked out, “Comes back, Jojo! Comes to Rek!”
My belly churned. “If she did leave, she’ll be back,” I muttered with utmost certainty. Joanie and Rosa had become like family to me, I loved those two crazy fools. I was happily their thirdy. Joanie wouldn’t just up and leave us like that, even if she had been in a rut of late. She certainly wouldn’t leave all of her cousin-god-babies she was a dedicated auntie to. She just wouldn’t, no matter what was going on.
Boog nodded but set his bag of dung fuel down and exited the hut. “Boog go see. No worries Boog’ pumpkin, I go look.”
By the time he’d returned, I’d fed both of the girls and had just put them down for their afternoon nap. Rek had, thankfully, stopped howling by then.
“Things here. Joansie not,” Boog reported. “Bag found. No Joansie.”
“Taken,” Khri chimed in. “Joanie no leave Melman.” It was like the beast was reading my mind. She never went anywhere without her favorite purse, jokingly named Melman by me for its yellow outside and giraffe print inside.
Boog nodded. “Hunters gather. Search.”
“Khri go,” Khri volunteered, bending his tall frame to scoop me up in a bracing hug. “Boog stay,” he said as he lifted his head, meeting Boog’s gaze.
“Boog stay,” Boog agreed.
Wrapping my arms around Khri’s middle in a bear hug, I gave him a none too gentle squeeze. “Thank you, handsome. I know if anyone can find her, it’s you, your kin, and the rest of the hunters.”
“We find,” Khri assured me, though his look was grim.
I was worried his definition of finding her did not necessarily mean whole or alive. Squeezing my eyes shut tight, I inhaled deeply, taking in his scent. Calm washed over me almost instantly as he began brushing his hand through my hair and my males’ soothing purrs started up. They did that for me, grounded me when I felt lost at sea.
“I’m gonna beat her once you find her,” I mumbled, to try and break up the tension.
“Me first,” Boog muttered, making me laugh.
“Not if Rek find Jojo first,” Khri pointed out. My big bad warrior dude did not laugh. My guts twisted.
Planting a sweet kiss on me with promises for more when he returned, Khri gathered up supplies, gave each of the girls a quick nuzzle across the tops of their heads, and readied to leave. Being particularly clingy this moment, I hugged his waist, following him to the door.
“We find Joanie, Mally-mine. We find,” he swore, brushing the back of his hand down the side of my face. Cupping his hand in mine, I nuzzled the flat of his.
“I love you. Be careful, all of you, you hear?”
“Khri hears him female,” he
purred down at me, tipping my chin with a clawed finger to give me one last lingering kiss. And then he was gone, rushing off to meet up with the others near those already gathering by the communal fire pit.
“Jesus, Joans, where the heck are you?” I murmured, rubbing my arms to fight off the chill in the air. It was already starting to snow. This was their cold season, meaning it was about to get colder than cold not so long from now.
The End.
Sort of...
Until Bride of Chance!
Due out 2021
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Thank you for taking the time to slog through my nonsense! I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did coming up with this wild ish.
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About The Author
Jeanette Lynn
Jeanette Lynn lives with her Neanderthal, beyond awesome kiddlens, slightly eccentric terrier mix menace and Hobbit Chi-shweenie. She’ll most often be found traipsing around in a pair of her kooky themed leggings and one of many a comfy, nerdy T-shirt, a book somewhere nearby and a sarcastic retort on her lips. (Ooo. I sound so fancy)
Pumpkin Bride: Brides of the Hunt: A Brides of the Hunt Holiday Novel Page 15
