With the sun beginning to set, a column of teal smoke spun around Jeanee’s body. She set off for the horizon, destination unknown. The mystery of this modern landscape excited her greatly.
Besides, wherever she went there’d be plenty of wishes to grant. That was the one constant of human life.
###
Alien Unbirthing
“I got my sights on a real pretty lady.”
The radio crackled. “Oh yeah? What does she look like?”
Johnny set his jaw crooked, mimicking the southern drawl while chewing a piece of gum. “About five-and-a-half, hundred and thirty-five pounds. Legs up to heaven. Dark hair and totally gorgeous. Has way too many clothes on, though.”
“And what’s she wearing underneath them?” said the voice on the radio.
Johnny bit his lip. “Black panties. The real skimpy kind. She wants to appear professional on the outside, but she’s real naughty underneath. I bet it’s a thong. She knows how sexy she looks in it. And a black bra. She’s the sort that always matches them.”
After a brief burst of static, the voice replied, “And what if said lady has got her hand down the front of her pants? She thinks you’re real cute, too. She’s all alone back in the office. If only a pair of big, strong arms were here to hold her, oh yes. She wouldn’t be so lonely then.”
Johnny grinned. “So, was I right?”
“About what?”
“The panties,” Johnny said, keeping his finger on the button. “Are they black?”
The voice on the other end laughed. “Black, yes. Not a thong. Sorry to disappoint.”
“I bet they’d look better on the floor anyway.”
“Thirty more minutes and you can find out.”
Johnny laughed. He didn’t know if she was being truthful or not. They never had the courage to do it at work, even if it was unlikely anyone would ever find out. Mackenzee was the only other ranger on duty. The rest of the park was empty, save a few sneaky raccoons who treated the garbage bins as a smorgasbord.
He figured he was two miles away from the visitor center. Mackenzee was probably at her desk doing some crossword puzzle, biting the eraser to shreds trying to figure out a five-letter synonym for extraterrestrial. Every other night was typically just as quiet. Johnny had to make the rounds every two hours to make sure things were in order—the nightly shift of a park ranger. He had to write a short report after each one, explaining the condition of the park and if he saw anything that wasn’t right.
“Mack, you still there?”
The radio came to life again. “Where else would I be?”
“It’s real dark at night.”
“Aw, you poor thing. Watch out. Those raccoons might be after you. I hear they have a thing for park rangers. You know, it’s a good thing these conversations aren’t recorded. They might find out how much of a scaredy-cat you are.”
“And other things. What are you doing right now?”
“Trying to figure out this damn puzzle.”
“I knew it! What’s got you stumped?”
“Well, it’s a nine-letter word for a person who dumps refuse, not to be confused with an insect.”
Johnny stopped. The beam of his flashlight had been leading him, twenty or thirty feet out. Metal glinted not far ahead. The western gate to the northern trail was wide open. It had been shut two hours ago. Fresh tire tracks led into the park, veering off into the woods. Johnny spotted a small pile of trash, beer bottles and empty cigarette packages mostly.
“Litterbug.”
“That’s it!” Mackenzee said. “It fits perfectly.”
Johnny closed the gate and latched it. The lock was nowhere to be seen. Whoever had dumped their trash had probably removed it with bolt cutters. The security camera above was still operational.
“Mack, check the footage for the northwestern gate between one and three o’clock.”
“Sure thing. Raccoons learning to open gates now?”
Johnny chuckled. “I wish. Got some idiots dumping trash inside the park. It’ll probably be a truck. They cut right through the lock and drove right in.”
Less than a minute later, Mackenzee came through on the radio. “Found it. About forty-five minutes ago. The truck goes out of the shot, but it leaves without anything in the bed. Can’t see the license plate.”
“That’s it. How many occupants you see?”
“Two, I think.”
Johnny sighed. “Put in an order for another lock. The best the budget will allow.”
“On it.”
He couldn’t understand why someone would do such a thing. Not only had the two morons broken the law by dumping their trash, they had illegally entered a federally-owned property. It was like they were purposely trying to spite the park.
He reached for the portable radio again.
“Mack, is the truck at the office?”
“Yeah. You want me to bring it to you?”
Johnny checked his watch. “Not yet. It’ll be my lunch break shortly. It can wait.”
“Good thing the park can depend on you.”
“Yeah, I’m just a regular superhero in civilian clothes.”
With the moon climbing over the treetops, Johnny pointed his flashlight on the path ahead for the return trip. The pile of trash would still be there in two hours. Besides, it wasn’t like they had any other more important issues tonight. He whistled to himself, following the dirt road down a small slope next to a rockface. The end of the flashlight reflected off a sign: WATCH OUT FOR FALLING BOULDERS.
Not far ahead, someone was standing in the middle of the road.
Johnny rubbed his eyes. It wasn’t uncommon to see shapes in the darkness, strange figures that appeared when the light happened to hit something just right. He hated looking out into the woods just for that reason. Yet, the person was still standing in the road—a woman by the look of it. Johnny kept the flashlight aimed at her feet as he neared, each step more careful than the last.
“Ma’am, are you all right?”
She didn’t say anything.
“What are you doing out here by yourself?”
Silently, she pointed out into the woods. Her arm was eerily steady, the finger extended perfectly straight. Her head turned toward the same direction, eyes unblinking.
“I lost my purse,” she said. “It’s out there. I lost it.”
Johnny shined the flashlight toward the trees. “Your purse?”
“I lost it,” she repeated, nodding.
“What are you doing out here at night? Are you lost?”
“Just find my purse. “
There was something unnatural about her voice, but Johnny couldn’t put his finger on any exact quality. Regardless, it made the hairs on his neck absolutely stiff. She was a pretty gal, pale in the light with long blonde hair. Johnny saw that she was pregnant, and far along by the look of it. Girls didn’t get to her size without popping out a stinky human midget a few days later.
Her face also looked familiar.
“You need a ride somewhere?”
“I lost my purse,” she said again, in the exact same tone.
“Yeah, the purse. After I get it for you, you’re going to answer my questions, right?”
She said nothing.
Johnny set off into the woods, carrying his flashlight. At the edge of the road, the ground dropped off sharply, a rocky slope descending into a thick net of trees. He eased himself down for a few steps, before a small boulder broke loose and sent him stumbling the rest of the way, slamming into a tree. The flashlight launched from his hand, landing ten feet away in a bush.
Hope that purse is worth breaking my neck over.
He reached for his radio.
“Mack, bring the truck.”
A few seconds passed before she replied. “Sure thing.” It sounded like she was snacking on potato chips. “Second thoughts about picking up that trash?”
“It’s not that. I found a woman out here, all alone.”
�
�All alone?”
“Just bring the truck, Mack. We’ll take her back to the visitor center. She’s not one for talking.”
“Be there in a few minutes.”
Johnny secured the radio to his belt and went for the flashlight. The impact hadn’t switched it off, so it continued to shine light farther into the wilderness, a yellowish beam that went on and on. He reached into the bush and grasped metal, relieved that he hadn’t lost it completely.
The strange woman didn’t even ask if he was all right.
“So, where did you lose that purse?” Johnny called back, raising his voice.
There was no answer.
“It would help if I knew where to—”
Johnny froze. The beam of the flashlight passed over something large and metallic, almost hidden behind the gigantic trunk of a massive oak tree. The foreign object was the length of an eighteen-wheeler and twice as wide, smooth like an airplane’s fuselage without the wings. He didn’t see any windows, though.
“Jesus,” Johnny muttered, feeling a sudden chill around his legs. A strange mist hung near the ground, hugging the dirt. Little vents near the bottom of the crashed aircraft were emitting it silently.
He slowly neared it, raising his light up the surface and watching how it perfectly reflected off, shining elsewhere into the woods.
He reached for his radio.
“Mack! Mack, come in.”
There was only static coming through.
Johnny couldn’t stop thinking that it was some sort of spaceship. Despite its smooth, aerodynamic body, it certainly wasn’t like any airplane he’d ever seen before. It wasn’t exactly a flying saucer either, but it definitely looked like something from another world. The earth around it was all screwed up, too. Johnny saw grass and plants ripped up from the soil, which had been split into a concave path several yards wide. It looked like some sort of crash landing.
There was a little red button flashing on the exterior of the ship, level with his eyes. Johnny took a deep breath and pressed it.
With the flashlight beginning to tremble in his hand, Johnny watched as a seam developed in the metallic surface. There was a great hiss from somewhere inside, and more of that strange mist oozing through this new crack. Shortly after, it was clear what it was. A door separated from the rest of the ship, bending down to the ground.
Johnny pointed his flashlight into the darkness within. Something blue stared back, tall and humanoid with dark eyes. He twisted away, crouching against the hull of the spacecraft, grabbing his chest. The flashlight fell between his legs, landing on the dirt.
Oh my God, Johnny thought, picturing the strange face that had looked directly at him. It wasn’t human at all! The eyes were massive and oblong, frightful things that made the dark forest a more preferable place to be. His heart continued to race for another minute, thumping hard. Meanwhile, his ears listened carefully. There was no sound inside the ship, no footsteps coming louder and louder. Everything was quiet and still.
Johnny pushed himself back to his feet, grabbing the flashlight. He couldn’t stop his hand from shaking, but he returned to the entrance, peering into the interior of this strange spaceship. The blue creature was there again, standing ten feet away and not moving.
“Hello?” His voice echoed within.
Nothing happened. The blue humanoid didn’t move. There was another like it nearby too, standing like the first, almost identical in appearance. Neither of them had a single piece of clothing on. Johnny saw that they were clearly female, with sizable breasts and curvy figures. They looked a lot like women, except for their blue skin and outrageous stature. Seriously, these things must’ve been nine feet tall! Johnny had to look way up to see their massive black eyes, empty and still.
Both of them were still, dead maybe. Johnny poked the nearest one on the belly and jumped back. The alien woman didn’t respond. On top of that, her skin was cold. He couldn’t imagine something being alive and cold like that. She was like a statue, secured to a metal rail by the neck, her toes only barely touching the floor. A little pressure caused her to swing back and forth.
So, are you an alien or not? Johnny was convinced that he was standing inside a spacecraft, crashed by the look of it. The women inside were exotic and clearly not of this world—or any other one in the solar system. Yet, none of them looked to be alive. Johnny pinched the nearest one’s skin just to be sure. Again, nothing happened.
The beam of the flashlight passed over the more intimate details of her body. He had to look up a little to see her breasts, which were huge, round globes with purple nipples. More curious than ever, Johnny reached out and touched one, bringing his finger around the summit to the nipple itself. It felt like a woman’s, with the soft, supple flesh yielding with a little pressure. Yet, the nipple remained as it was, unresponsive to touch and undeniably cold.
She was definitely not alive.
Further down, her slender body tapered to a thin waist before exploding outward into wide hips. Johnny was familiar with that figure; it was everything a man wanted in a woman, plump in all the right places, shockingly humanlike. And, down between her legs was a hairless entrance, remarkably like a woman’s pussy. The blue color faded to a purple around the lips, before brightening to a pink just at the center. That was a color he was acquainted with.
“Damn, that’s a killer body,” he muttered. Yet, it was what was between her legs which kept his attention the most. Johnny reached out with his finger. He just touched the top of it—where her clit would’ve been had this blue chick been a human woman. Further back, his finger slipped inside a little, separating her folds down the middle groove. At the rear was a hole to push the tip into, just like a real woman’s pussy.
With a smirk, Johnny pushed upward, twisting his finger. There was hardly any resistance, even if the skin itself wasn’t wet. Simultaneously, the inside seemed to suck it in farther, the outer lips becoming almost elastic as his fist touched the surface of her pussy. Her entrance easily spread wider, taking each of his five fingers and all of his palm, pulling his hand, wrist, and forearm deep into her body.
“Johnny!” came a voice.
He removed his arm, fighting against the suction. With a groan, it slipped out. Everything below the wrist was covered in a blue goop, clinging between his fingers. It had a sweet scent to it, and it was more slippery than anything he had ever touched before. He flung his hand around before wiping it on his pant leg. That got most of it.
When he exited the ship, Mackenzee was standing on the road, shouting his name. Her flashlight swung right to left, scanning the forest.
“Right here!” Johnny shouted, waving his arms.
The flashlight shot to him.
“What are you doing down there?”
Johnny cupped his hands around his mouth. “I’ll explain it when you come here!”
Mackenzee made her way down the same slope that Johnny had, without the stumbling and crashing-into-a-tree part. She rushed toward him, her ponytail bobbing back and forth.
“I didn’t see a woman,” she said.
“What woman?” Then, Johnny remembered. “Shit. I completely forgot about her.” It had slipped his mind. The blue alien bodies and the spaceship probably had something to do with that.
“And she ran off?” Mackenzee started for the truck. “Great. I was hoping tonight would be easy. We’ll have to search. Want to call in backup from local PD?”
“Wait.” Johnny waved for her to come back. “She can wait. You have to see this.”
Mackenzee stopped. “Johnny, you know missing persons take top priority. What is it?”
“I can’t explain.” Even if he somehow managed to put the experience into words, Johnny knew Mackenzee wouldn’t even believe him. He’d sound insane. Hell, if he heard the story from her, he’d think she had gone mad. Good thing the spaceship was close.
She started smiling. “You really haven’t thought this through. Do you know how much poison ivy is out here?”
/> “What?”
“Come on, Johnny. The moonlight. All by ourselves in the woods. I like the idea, but we have more pressing issues here.”
Johnny shook his head. “No, that’s definitely not it.”
“Then what?”
He led her behind the giant oak tree. The spaceship was still there, slightly tilted toward the ground with the rear of it suspended in the air. The chrome fuselage caught the beam of his flashlight and bounced it off. A cold mist swirled around his ankles, disturbed by the footsteps.
Johnny glanced over at Mackenzee. Her mouth was agape.
“Holy shit! We have … we have to call someone. Have you found any survivors?”
“Mack, look! It’s a damn spaceship. An alien spaceship.”
It wasn’t easy to believe. Her eyes were locked on it, her mouth refusing to close. Johnny touched the metallic hull to show her that it was real. The door was still open, too. If she wasn’t freaked out before, then she soon would be.
Inside was just as before. Nothing had disturbed the blue alien women hanging up by their necks. Their tall bodies loomed over them both, heads almost touching the ceiling. They were bona fide giants. Johnny felt like a little kid looking up at them, each of their faces expressionless, purple lips still and cold. Their black eyes reflected everything.
Mackenzee shrieked at the sight of them, backing out of the door and almost falling down into the dirt. She covered her mouth. Her flashlight trembled between her fingers.
“No, it’s okay! Look, they’re not even alive,” Johnny explained, rushing to her side and leading her back in. “See?” He flicked one in the belly with his finger. “They’re cold.”
“Johnny, they’re aliens,” Mackenzee gasped.
Johnny figured as much, but hearing her say it out loud made him stop and stare at them. They were real aliens, creatures from another planet, or another dimension. They weren’t alive, but they still confirmed the existence of extraterrestrial life. They looked healthy—though, admittedly, Johnny wasn’t sure what a healthy blue alien chick would look like. Still, there were no visible wounds. They were just cold and lifeless.
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