by Beth Flynn
“Come here, son. Come let me hold you like I used to.”
Poor sap. He was remembering his kid. Ralph wondered how old the boy was when Pop’s wife took him. He started to get up to walk him back to his room when he realized Pop was standing over him.
Before he realized what was happening, Pop’s right hand reached out and grabbed him by the hair.
“Just one kiss. You just need to kiss it one time, okay? You’ll do that for daddy, won’t you?”
What the fuck?
He realized that Pop was using his right hand to pull Ralph’s head toward him. It was dark, but not so dark that he couldn’t see the outline of the old man’s erection pointed at him.
He tried to pull away, but Pop’s grasp on his hair was tight. He was a strong motherfucker.
With all of his strength, he reached up and punched the old man right in the stomach. Pop fell backwards and landed hard against the TV and the flimsy stand it was on. There was a loud crash.
Ralph jumped up and turned on the light.
He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. It would’ve been slightly comical if it weren’t so awful.
A naked old man, stretched out on the floor with a TV covering his face and chest.
He knew immediately he’d killed him.
He lifted the heavy TV off Pop, looked down into his open eyes. His shoulders sagged under the weight of what had just happened.
He hadn’t meant to kill Pop.
“Ran off with a drunken sailor? That’s why your wife left you? She left because you were hurting your son. You stupid old man.”
He rubbed at his eyes. It was the middle of the night and he was too tired to deal with this.
“I’ll bury you tomorrow with your dogs.”
He grabbed his blanket from the couch and tossed it over Pop’s body. He then walked back to the bedroom and crawled into bed. He was tired of sleeping on the couch.
The next morning, he started out early to avoid the blistering heat of the day. He dragged Pop’s body, wrapped in the blanket, all the way out to where he’d found the dog’s graves. He reached down and retrieved the shovel he’d tucked in the blanket with Pop so he didn’t have to carry it.
He’d just started to dig when he stopped and leaned the shovel up against a tree. He had to take a piss first.
He had his back to Pop’s stiff body and was aiming his urine stream at an ant pile when a strange growling caught his attention. He turned around and stumbled backwards. He was still pissing, and urine shot up in the air as he fell on his ass, mouth open.
There before his eyes, not five feet from him, two alligators were fighting over Pop’s body. He started to scurry backwards as he watched. It was the most horrible thing he’d ever witnessed as they tore at Pop’s gray flesh, ripping chunks of meat as they played tug of war with the body.
After deciding that there was enough to share, they both slunk backwards into the swamp, taking the body with them. The last thing he remembered seeing was Pop’s wide eyes open and staring at him as one gator bit down hard on his head before sinking below the surface.
Bile from his stomach came up, burning his throat. He reluctantly swallowed it as he tried to catch his breath.
He was so paralyzed with fear he couldn’t move.
He had never considered the gators when he went out hunting for the turtle. And he definitely hadn’t thought about them when he’d dragged Pop out here to bury him.
He felt nauseous, but knew he wouldn’t vomit. He managed to stand up and zip his pants.
He picked up the shovel and what was left of the tattered blanket and, with a wary eye, headed back for the motel. He had work to do.
Chapter Twenty-Six
1976
Grizz paged Blue, who in turn got the word out that Kit was back. Eventually, bikes started rolling in and people started taking their usual places around the pit.
Kit stood at the window of her unit and watched. Even after rambling off the list of questions after she returned, Grizz never waited for her to reply. He knew why she’d left. He’d already admitted he was an awful person who did awful things and had no intention of stopping.
Maybe Grunt was wrong. Maybe she wouldn’t be able to convince Grizz to cease his criminal activities. She wouldn’t think about that now. She wouldn’t let an unknown tomorrow interfere with today.
Grunt’s car pulled in from the highway and headed for the office parking lot. He had someone with him. Who would he be bringing here? She caught herself before she allowed herself to even consider she might have had a flash of jealousy. Then she laughed when she thought about how jealous she’d been of Sarah Jo, how that had turned out.
She’d left the window and was rummaging through the refrigerator to make something for dinner when she heard the door to her unit open.
“Grunt thought you might need a friend,” she heard the girl’s voice say.
“Oh, Jo,” she cried, as she ran to her friend and threw herself into her open arms.
Kit and Sarah Jo talked as they made dinner. All of Kit’s fears and insecurities about being with Grizz tumbled out. It was the first time she’d really opened up to Sarah Jo since their friendship had begun the previous winter. It was now almost a year since Grizz brought her to the motel, and she’d been close with Jo for about the last five months.
“Kit, if I’m going to be honest with you, the truth is I don’t know if I like Grizz. He’s scary.”
Kit paused from chopping onions and looked at Jo. The fact that her best friend didn’t like her husband caught her off-guard. “Has he ever done anything to you?”
“No, no,” Jo answered quickly. “Of course he hasn’t done anything to me. But I’m not an idiot. I know what he does to other people. I guess I’m just afraid for you. You know, your parents were lame, but you weren’t exposed to anything like you’ve seen living here. Have you ever thought about just going home?”
Ginny didn’t want to answer the question, so she ignored it. “Don’t be afraid for me, Jo. Grizz would never hurt me or let anyone hurt me.”
“Okay. I believe that, but he can’t protect you from everything. And he can’t give you a normal life. Do you really want to be with a man whose only form of income is from illegal activity?”
Kit looked at Jo questioningly. They both knew Sarah Jo’s father, Fess, was paid by Grizz. Fess was a teacher and never participated in actual gang activity, but he was responsible for maintaining Grizz’s list of informants. The work was important enough to earn him a decent kickback from Grizz.
“No, I don’t want to be with that man, but I want to be with Grizz.”
“I guess it really sucks, then, that they’re the same person.”
Jo had finished helping with the casserole now baking in the oven. She sat on the couch, casually flipping through a magazine while Kit worked on a homemade dessert for later. She thought back to when Kit had first been brought to the motel, when she’d first met her.
Grunt had showed up at Jo’s school that day, a Friday afternoon almost a year ago. May 1975. She was heading toward her bus when she heard a horn. Putting her hand up to shield the bright afternoon sun, she caught a flash of blue. What was Grunt doing here? She quickly changed her direction, and instead of getting on her bus, made her way to the parking lot in the front of the school. The end of the lot where Grunt was parked was visible from the bus loading area.
“Hey, what brings you to school?” Jo had casually asked, then came a flash of fear. “My dad?”
Grunt had reached for her and caught her in a quick, friendly hug. “No, no, nothing with Fess. I just need to talk, Jo.”
She’d stepped back then, looking up into his face. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“No. I’m not okay.” After a pause, “Grizz had Ginny brought to the motel last night.”
“Oh, no!” He held the passenger door open for her, slammed it, and went around to the driver’s side. He got in and started the loud engine.
; “Why? Why did Grizz bring her to the motel?” Jo knew Grizz had been keeping an eye on Ginny for a long time. She knew about Grunt’s occasional outings with Grizz as they went to check on her. She knew that after getting his license, Grunt had watched her a few times on his own, without Grizz. She’d heard stories about Ginny for the last few years.
She also knew Grunt was totally obsessed with Ginny. Ginny was all he ever talked about.
“Did he bring her there for you? Like a gang thing? Like, you know, so he can give her to you?”
“No.” Grunt’s voice was toneless as he pulled out of the parking lot. “He brought her there for him.”
“For him?” Sarah Jo sat ramrod straight and stared at him. “Why would he want her? Isn’t she my age?”
“Yes, she’s your age. I guess he just felt that she should be with him.” He slammed his fist against the steering wheel. “Jo, it caught me off guard. I still haven’t figured out his intentions. I just don’t know what to do.”
Jo was quiet for a minute. “Grunt, don’t do anything. You have to wait this out and see where he goes with it. You can’t make a decision to act until you know what he’s up to.”
“Yeah, well, you know Grizz. It’s not like he announces his intentions or asks anyone’s permission to do whatever the hell he wants. This totally surprised me.”
“Hmmmm. Can’t imagine Willow is real happy about this.”
Grunt gave a short laugh. “You’re right about that. She was really pissed. Doesn’t matter though. Grizz doesn’t care what anyone thinks, especially Willow.” He was quiet for a minute. “But I worry about that, you know? I don’t want Willow to hurt Ginny or anything. I’ll kill her myself if she goes near her.”
“Will Grizz let Willow hurt her?” Jo frowned.
“No, I don’t think he will. He practically choked the life out of her when she lunged at Ginny last night.”
“So he cares,” Sarah Jo said quietly.
This was new. Other than making sure Blue got money to cover Grunt’s college tuition, Sarah Jo had never heard one story about Grizz that indicated he had a heart. Whether or not he had a soul was still debatable.
“Yeah, he cares. But I don’t know if that’s good for me or not.”
“Just wait, Grunt. Give it some time. Keep an eye on her without letting anybody know what you’re doing. It shouldn’t be too hard. You’ve been doing it for years anyway.”
That’s exactly what Grunt did. He stayed in the background. But it wasn’t always easy.
Now, watching Kit make the homemade dessert, Sarah Jo remembered the night Grunt had called her up with a strange request. It was more than a month after her friend had been brought to the motel. After she was given her gang name. Kit.
Grunt’s voice had been cold. “Jo, I need you at the motel. I need Kit to think you’re my girlfriend.”
“Why?”
“Grizz thinks she’s spending too much time with me.”
“Is she?”
“Yes.” Grunt had sighed over the phone line. “But just for the last week or so. She’s been seeking me out to play chess and listen to records. And before you say anything, I know I’m wrong to encourage her, but I can’t help myself. I want to be with her, Jo.”
“You’ll never be with her if Grizz suspects you have feelings, Grunt. You’d better figure out a way to make him think you don’t care. And if Grizz thinks Kit cares for you, you better make him think you could care less.”
The next morning Fess dropped Jo at the motel. She knocked on Grunt’s door and went in without waiting for an invitation. He was sitting on his bed, head in his hands.
“Grizz told me last night I could take her off the motel grounds for the day. He made it clear he thought she might be crushing on me and I was to put a stop to it.”
Sarah Jo laid her helmet on the dresser and sat next to him. He started to tell her a little bit about the night Kit lost her virginity. She didn’t say anything at first. Finally she’d heard enough.
“I can’t believe Grizz let you be her first!” Jo paced the room. “I just can’t believe it! How in the world did you convince him to let you do that? I mean, I know being Blue’s brother offers you some form of protection. But you told me how protective he is of her, Grunt.” She shook her head. “How are you even still alive?”
Grunt then told her the story about his manipulation of Grizz that night. He didn’t tell her everything, though. She knew that. He left out some details. She was his best friend, but some things were too intimate to share, even with Jo. When he was finished with his story, neither one of them said anything for a few minutes.
Jo didn’t know what to say. Finally, she took a deep breath. “So what’s the plan? How does this go down?”
“Let’s walk down to Grizz’s unit. She’s mentioned more than once she thinks Fess is really nice. I’ll just act like it would be nice for her to meet his daughter. Remember, don’t slip. It’s Kit now. Forget you know her name.”
“No problem,” she said as she slipped into his jacket. She looked up at him and shrugged, “For effect, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, it swims on you, but the fact that you’re wearing it will mean something.” He looked at the ground, his shoulders slumped. She’d never seen him like this.
Jo went to him, wrapped her arms around him. “Patience. Your heart is in the right place. This will work out.”
He met her eyes then. “You’re a good friend, Jo. C’mon.” He handed her helmet to her, then draped his left arm over her shoulders. She wrapped her right arm around his waist.
“You’re a good guy. You make being your friend easy. Oh, hey,” she elbowed him. “Did I tell you Blue’s wife invited my family over for dinner?”
Grunt stiffened.
“I know how much you hate her. Is she still trying to make you believe Kevin is your son?”
“Yeah. She’s a crazy bitch. I’ll tell you about it later.”
“Just so you know, my youngest brother looks exactly like my Uncle Dave. He’s my dad’s brother. It wouldn’t be unusual for one of Blue’s kids to look like you.”
“Yeah, I know.” He sighed. “I just hate her so much, Jo.”
“I was thinking if we do go to Blue’s for dinner, I could melt a laxative and drop it in whatever she’s drinking.”
“No, she deserves worse. How about a mini-explosive in her tampon?”
Sarah Jo started to giggle.
An exploding tampon would serve her right, Grunt thought to himself. He started to laugh too.
They were both still laughing when Grunt opened the door. Kit was standing there with her arm raised. She must have just been ready to knock on the door. She had an expression on her face that said she’d just taken a punch to the gut. It broke Grunt’s heart.
Grunt spent the day with Sarah Jo at the beach. He did his best not to think about Kit, but she’d consumed him for as long as he could remember. Jo knew when not to say anything. She just listened, and it was all that he needed. She couldn’t help herself though. One thing had aroused her curiosity.
“You told me you slept with her against her will, or at least I think that’s how it sounded,” she said, peering over at him from her bright orange beach towel. They were lying side by side. “But it’s a little confusing. She actually asked you to personally screw her?”
Grunt pinked a little at that. “I told you I made him think I was going to use the police baton. Well, when she saw it, she asked me to do it myself. I didn’t just screw Kit, Jo.”
Jo flushed. “I didn’t mean anything by it, Grunt. I guess what I’m trying to figure out is why she seems to like you after that. I mean, if it was against her will, it was technically rape. But then you said she asked you. I don’t know. I just can’t understand it, I guess.”
“You don’t have to understand it, Jo,” he snapped.
Jo looked over at him, but he’d already turned his face away. She sighed and closed her eyes. She guessed there were some things
she would never understand.
They spent the rest of the day on Fort Lauderdale Beach. They had a late lunch at an outdoor cafe, then spent some time window shopping at some of the stores along the beach.
It was sad how much he loved Kit, but they both knew he had to follow Jo’s advice. He waited.
“Jo? Jo, do you want to try it?”
Kit’s voice snapped Jo back to the present. She hadn’t realized she’d been staring blankly at the same page on the magazine, lost in last year’s memories. Kit was standing over her now, holding out a spoon with chocolate on it.
“Here, take a lick. I know how much you love chocolate. It’s homemade mousse. What do you think?”
Jo took the spoon from Kit’s hand and licked it.
“Heaven,” was all she said, giggling, then handed it back.
Kit went to the kitchen while Sarah Jo wandered over to the window and looked out. She was still gazing outside when Kit walked up next to her.
“What are you looking at?”
“Just checking out the women in the pit.” Jo gave a shrug.
“What about the women in the pit?”
“I don’t see Chicky or Moe, guess they’re off somewhere, but it seems to me that every other female out there is trying to get your husband’s attention.”
Kit looked out to where Sarah Jo was staring. Grizz was standing off to the side, closer to the playground area and well behind the lawn chairs. He looked to be having a serious conversation with Blue and some other guy Kit didn’t recognize. The usual crowd was sitting around the pit with some newcomers. Some had women on their laps. There was even one girl crouched between Monster’s legs.
“Really, I don’t see any women trying to get Grizz to notice them.” Kit said.
“Yeah? Then why do you think every woman out there, and I’m counting five, has brown hair and bangs?”
“Ummm, because they have brown hair and bangs?” Kit rolled her eyes at Jo.
“You’re wrong. Isn’t that Tiny on Axel’s lap? Didn’t she use to be a blonde? And I know Chili. I’ve seen her before, know for a fact she’s a natural redhead. Always wore her hair parted down the middle. Not anymore.”
