“For you, yeah. But he’s hot. And kind. And intelligent. I’ve had a massive crush on him for a couple years now.”
“You want me to set you up with my brother.”
“I mean, if I could open your eyes to how you felt about Cole, I figured you might be willing to help me with your brother? What kind of woman does he like?”
“I—it—”
“It’s just that every time I get close to him, I clam up. It’s embarrassing. He asks me questions, and I can only sort of sputter out one-word answers. He probably thinks I’m an absolute moron. And I promise not to sleep with him on the first date. You know, like you just did with Cole.”
I gawked. “Hey!”
She laughed. “I’m just messing with you. Trying to lighten the mood so you don’t kill me.”
I paused. “How long have you wanted to tell me this?”
“For a while now. I mean, life’s kind of been crazy, and there was never a good time. You know? Between you pushing that fifth grade program with the school and coping with what happened with Brent and me losing my mom, it just… I don’t know. Was never a good time? I wasn’t intentionally trying to hide it or anything. I just figured maybe I’d…”
I snickered. “Caught me in a good mood?”
“Is that shitty of me? This is really shitty of me.”
“It’s not shitty, Nicole. I mean, I’m shocked. A bit weirded out. But I mean, I’m not going to stop you if you want to date Lance. Though, I don’t know why you would. He’s a pain in my ass.”
“He’s your brother. He’s supposed to be a pain in your ass.”
I finished my coffee. “If you want my help, I’ll help you. But it’s up to you to get your head out of your ass and actually talk to the man.”
“I know. I know. Just… try to put in a good word for me? That’s all I’m asking.”
“Don’t worry. I’ve got your back.”
She sighed. “Holy shit, I thought you were going to kill me. Thank you for not killing me.”
“The lack of caffeine probably saved you. That, and already having a conversation with Mom this morning.”
“Uh-oh.”
“Not an ‘uh-oh,’ really. She’s just—well, you know my mom. Always a ball of energy. Never needed coffee to get her going.”
“I don’t know how she does it.”
I giggled. “Neither do I. But I need to get back inside. I’m sure Ace will be up soon.”
“Give that puppy lots of kisses for me, okay?”
“Most definitely.”
We said our goodbyes, and I hung up the phone. Then, I crafted my payback message. Oh, this would be good. If she got to drop a massive bomb on me about Cole before I even knew how I felt about him, then this was my chance to have fun. This was my chance to really get her back. Granted, things had worked out in my favor. So, hopefully, things worked out in hers.
I pulled up a text message to my brother and grinned as the words came to life. Not that my brother wouldn’t enjoy the bluntness, but he wasn’t a morning person. And I got great joy in knowing this text would slap him straight across his face.
Me: So, apparently Nicole’s in love with you. She’s awesome and not at all the klutz she comes off as. Do something about it. You won’t regret it.
And a few minutes later, my brother messaged back, making me giggle as I read the simplistic words.
Lance: What the fuck?
Oh, this was going to be loads of fun to watch.
20
Cole
I sat with Millie curled up in my lap in the waiting room of the psychologist’s office. We were back for our second appointment, but it was our first appointment with this new doctor, Dr. Yousef. After confirming several appointments with her over the coming weeks, I’d done a great deal of research on her. I read testimony after testimony that her techniques worked, that her ideas were creative, that she really could dig down to the meat of a child and begin to help them in ways they needed. But I’d also read a constant negative point throughout all those reviews as well.
That Dr. Yousef was cold upon arrival.
Still, I didn’t want that to hinder what Millie needed. So long as Millie got the help she required to sort of pick through all this emotional instability she had, I’d deal with someone who was cold-natured. So long as she wasn’t cold-natured to Millie.
I didn’t hold my breath, though, as she walked into the waiting room.
“You must be Mr. Yarrow.”
Her flat voice hit my ears, and I tensed.
“I am. Yes. Dr. Yousef?” I asked.
“And you must be Millie,” she said, completely ignoring my question.
Millie curled into me, and I held on to her tightly.
“Come along, it’s time for your appointment,” Dr. Yousef said.
She held out her hand, but Millie didn’t go.
“Maybe I should walk her back,” I said.
“No, no. We’ll go when she’s ready to take my hand.”
Millie clung to me harder than ever. But as Dr. Yousef stood there, she slowly pulled away from me. Whether out of curiosity, or out of defeat, she slowly took the woman’s hand. Every single part of me wanted to go after her as she walked alongside the doctor, especially with how many times she peeked back at me.
“Will I be able to come watch?” I asked.
“You can stay here. We’ll be back in about forty minutes,” Dr. Yousef said plainly.
I ground my teeth together as the two of them disappeared behind a door. And as my mind swirled with all sorts of things, I pulled out my phone. I buried myself in work emails and phone calls to Joe. I helped him with work while I sat there, staring aimlessly at the clock. I hated the fact that Millie was in a room without me, with some strange doctor who didn’t even so much as a crack a damn smile at us. I didn’t like the fact that I couldn’t peek in on what was going on. I didn’t like any part of this.
“She better have a fucking breakthrough,” I murmured to myself.
Then, exactly forty minutes later, they emerged.
And Millie had red eyes.
“Come here, sweet girl. Come on. I gotcha,” I said.
I held my arms out for her, and she rushed into them. She hugged me tightly, and I picked her up, ready to whisk her away from that doctor, away from this office, away from this fucking nonsense until we found someone that fit her better. But when Millie looked back at Dr. Yousef, I saw the woman nod.
“I’m sorry,” Millie said, sniffling.
“Hey, hey, hey. You have nothing to be sorry for,” I said.
I wiped away her tears and glared at the doctor standing by the door.
“I just—miss—I miss—”
I paused. “What do you miss, Millie?”
Tears streamlined down her face. “I miss Mama. I mi-mi-mi-miss her. A lot. And I-I-I-I—”
“I’ve got you. It’s okay. Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh.”
I rocked her side to side, shocked at the admission. I stood there, rooted to the floor, trying to soothe her as my eyes found Dr. Yousef’s again. The smallest of grins tickled her cheek, and she bowed her head. She eyed me one last time, casting a know-it-all glance my way before disappearing behind the door. I had no idea what to do. I mean, I understood Millie. I got it. I missed Susie with every passing day.
But how the hell did this cold doctor get Millie to finally be open about that?
Guess we’ll be back next week.
“How about we go get some ice cream, yeah?” I asked.
“Oh-oh-oh—okay,” Millie said.
“And maybe take some deep breaths. How’s that sound?” I asked.
She tucked her face into the crook of my neck and inhaled deeply. Her chest pressed against my shoulder as I walked us out, silently confirming our appointment for next week with the receptionist. I gave her a thumbs-up and an okay sign as we walked out the door, heading straight for my truck. And even though the bitter fall air had finally descended on our town, ice cream sound
ed just right.
So, I packed us into my truck.
“I’m proud of you, Millie,” I said.
She sniffled. “Really?”
“Uh-huh. It takes a very big girl to admit what you just did. I’m proud of you for opening up to me.”
“I didn’t like the daycare Mama took me to.”
I paused. “Oh?”
“No. It was loud. There were lots of kids I didn’t like. Mama made me go, though.”
“Do you remember the name of it?”
“No. It had a pink sign, though. Mama liked the pink sign.”
I wanted to interject. But I also didn’t want her to stop talking.
“Pink signs are nice,” I said.
“Not this one, though. This pink sign had lots of meanies with it. The kids always pushed me,” Millie said.
“That’s not very nice of them.”
“And when I pushed back, I always got in trouble.”
“That’s not good, either,” I said.
“I know. But Mama said I needed ‘soblishaton’ and she needed ‘Mama time.’”
“Soblishaton?”
“Mhm. She said it was time around people that weren’t her.”
I paused. “Socialization?”
“Yeah. Soblishaton.”
I grinned. “Is there anything you liked about—?”
“Mama liked sleepovers, though.”
“Oh?”
“Mhm. She had lots of them.”
I pulled into the parking lot of the ice cream parlor. “What kind of sleepovers?”
“She said they were her best friends. They’d always come over and sleep in her room. But I couldn’t have sleepovers.”
“Were they boys?”
“Yeah. She had lots of boy best friends. I’m not allowed to have boy best friends, though. Only girls. Only ones that look like me.”
I sighed. “How does that make you feel?”
“Like I want a cat.”
I snickered. “What?”
“A cat. Like next door. Mama’s nee-boor had a kitty, and it was really sweet. But Mama said black cats weren’t good. So, she didn’t let me play with it a lot.”
“Well, we already have a puppy, remember?”
“Maybe Hope gets lonely.”
“Maybe Ace could come over and play with Hope.”
Millie giggled. “Can Layla come over and play, too?”
I smiled. “You like Layla?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Like, a lot?”
“A lot, a lot. She can be my best friend. I think Mama would be okay with that.”
“I think she’d be very okay with that.”
I didn’t want to ruin the moment, so I let Millie continue to talk. I didn’t think she was capable of saying so much. But I sat there and listened, nonetheless. Had she talked with Dr. Yousef about all this stuff?
I had no idea what kind of voodoo magic that doctor worked, but we were definitely going back next week.
“Ready for ice cream?” I asked.
“Can we take it home?” Millie asked.
“Is that what you want?”
“Yeah. I’m tired.”
“How about we eat it in the truck, then. How’s that sound?”
“Sounds good.”
I pulled out of the parking space, and we drove through the small drive-thru the parlor had. After getting two identical swirled ice cream cones, we headed on back to the house. Millie was pretty silent as she ate her massive cone. I wasn’t sure if she’d eat all of it, to be honest. I mean, the second I ordered my large cone, she automatically wanted one just like mine. Something that made me both swell with pride and worry as she filled her stomach to the brim. I kept peeking back at her, watching as she slowed down. And once she got to the cone part of the ice cream, she slowly handed it to me.
“I’m done,” she said tiredly.
“All right. Now, you lean back and take a nap if you want to. Okay? We’re almost home.”
I took the cone from her and finished both hers and mine. By the time I pulled up the driveway, Millie was out cold. Literally. She shivered from the cool stomach of ice cream she had while she slept soundly. I parked the truck and gathered her into my arms. I walked her inside and over to the couch, which had become her napping spot. Hope hopped up there, wagging her tail and preparing to take her afternoon nap with her new favorite friend.
Then, I tucked the two bundles of joy in before reaching for my cell phone.
I dialed Ginny’s number as a plan formulated in my mind. I doubled back to close the front door, then locked it for good measure. I turned off all the lights before making my way to the kitchen, hoping and praying Layla’s mother picked up the phone.
Then, her voice wafted against my ear.
“How did the appointment this morning go?”
I paused. “How did you know about it?”
“I talked with Layla this morning. She told me about it.”
“Ah. Well. The appointment went well. Really well. Much better than I ever thought it would be.”
“What did they talk about? What was the doctor like? Did she talk to you about any of it after?”
“Actually, Ginny, I was calling because I have a favor to ask.”
“Of course. Anything. What is it?” she asked.
“I haven’t found a tutor for Millie yet. And she’s a bit fragile when it comes to meeting new people. We made a lot of progress today, and I don’t want to derail that progress by introducing her to someone else she doesn’t know.”
“Please tell me you’re asking me to tutor that sweet angel.”
“I mean, who better to ask than a retired teacher herself?”
“You know you didn’t even have to ask. But I’d be honored. What does she need help in?”
I smiled. “So, here’s what I was thinking.”
We laid out a plan and tweaked it for a while, trying to come up with a curriculum that covered all the major bases and prepared Millie for kindergarten. By the time the phone call was over, we had a solid plan in place: two-hour lessons split up into thirty-minute chunks, with each of those chunks covering a specific base. Mathematics, language, interpersonal skills, and fine motor skills. Three times a week, here at the house, until Millie met the basic requirements for kindergarten. It sounded like a good plan, one that would help out with the developmental delays Layla had spotted.
And I thanked my stars that, legally, she didn’t have to be enrolled in school yet in the state of Maine.
Because she sure as hell wasn’t ready for it.
21
Cole
I drove myself over to Ginny and Hank’s place after getting a few things done around the house. I was able to switch out all the handles on the cabinetry in the kitchen before having to go back and pick Millie up from her first tutoring session. I pulled into their driveway and watched the clock, counting down the last seven minutes until I knew they’d be done. Ginny and I decided that Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays would be the perfect schedule for Millie. But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed perfect for myself and Layla.
Especially since the tutoring aligned with Layla’s lunch at the school.
Still, it had been hard to relinquish Millie that morning. Even though I knew she and Ginny would get along just fine, there was something about dropping Millie off that tugged at my gut and I had blinked tears back as I drove away from their house. While I’d busied myself with work to do around the house, it didn’t stop me from wondering if Millie was okay. If she was getting frustrated or getting a handle on the concepts Ginny wanted to teach her. It didn’t stop my thoughts from being flooded with every single worry and doomsday scenario that could possibly exist.
Is this parenthood? Because this is torturous.
The second my clock in the truck struck twelve thirty, I was out the door. I walked onto their porch and knocked, then jammed my hands into my pockets. I didn’t want to seem too eager or untrusting of the si
tuation. Because it wasn’t that at all.
I was just interested in how things had gone.
“Come on in. Ginny just got her some lunch.”
Hank’s voice filled my ears as he opened the door.
“Lunch?” I asked.
“Yep. You know her. She figured since it was lunchtime, she’d feed the girl.”
I stepped inside. “What’s for lunch?”
“Ham and cheese with an apple and some chips. Can’t say I don’t want one myself.”
“Uncle Cole!”
I heard the pitter-pattering of those little footsteps, and my face beamed with a smile. I bent down and opened my arms to her, watching as her curly hair bellowed behind her. She charged into me, wrapping those tiny arms around my neck. When she hugged me close, I picked her up, holding her close to my body.
“Hey there, sweet girl. How’d things go?” I asked.
“Good,” she whispered.
“That’s good. Wanna tell me all about it?”
“Can I come back for dinner?”
I crouched back down, settling her on her feet. I cupped her cheeks before smoothing her hair away from her face. I furrowed my brow at her question, then took her hands within mine.
“What was that?” I asked.
“Can I come back over for dinner,” Millie said plainly.
“She’s more than welcome,” Ginny said, walking down the hallway.
“Yep. She’s got lasagna on the mind for tonight,” Hank said.
“Can I? Can I? Can I, please?” Millie begged.
I looked up at Ginny, and she smiled before nodding her head in approval. I mean, dinner would be fine. Right? She’d finish lunch, go home and take a nap with Hope. She’d wake up and we could play outside for a bit before coming back over. Hell, I might be able to see if Layla wanted to go out and do something.
There’s Ginny’s plan.
I grinned. “So, that’s okay?”
“She’s always welcome. You know this,” Ginny said.
“She can watch a movie with me later, too. If she wants,” Hank said.
“Can I? Please?” Millie said.
I chuckled. “Under one condition.”
“What?” she asked.
Brother’s Best Friend Page 13
