by F. C. Clark
‘Kate, she’s driving me mad. I know I’m getting fat – well, the baby is – but she keeps calling me a beached whale.’ Molly looks at Kiki.
‘Er, that’s not what I said.’ Kiki rolls her eyes.
‘You said I looked fat,’ Molly responds.
‘No – I said you looked bigger, as in the baby is growing!’
‘Kiki, leave her alone, I think you look beautiful.’
Molly drags herself through the door. Being the first in our group to get pregnant, we are all adjusting, but not nearly as much as her waistband!
‘You all right?’ I ask Kiki, pulling her close for a hug. ‘What time will your dad be here?’
‘He’s just landed at City Airport, and he’ll come straight here. The traffic was a nightmare.’
‘I thought your driver brought you?’
‘He did. You try being in the car with Molly moaning about her ankles and Barney, who clearly hasn’t shagged someone for at least twenty-four hours, not to mention the traffic – let’s just say it’s been eventful.’
We all lie around on the bed laughing and eating, side-tracking Harry from thoughts of tomorrow. I massage Molly’s swollen feet, while Barney indulges us with another one of his love stories. Kiki remains fairly tight-lipped; it’s safe to argue her mind is elsewhere.
A knock at the door makes Harry hyperventilate. She wants to see Raymond one last time before they get married. Barney does the honours as doorman, and Danny follows him through. There’s no sign of the groom.
‘Hi girls, Harry, you OK?’ Danny scans the room, and his eyes fall on the woman carrying his child – Molly.
‘I think so…’ She can’t hide her nerves. Danny holds his hand out for Molly. ‘Come on. Judging by your ankles, you need to rest.’
‘Are you sure you’re going to get your feet into Louboutins?’ Kiki looks at Molly’s swollen feet and ankles.
‘Even if it kills me, they’ll be on my feet. That’s the only reason I agreed to be a bridesmaid – sorry, Harry.’ She stands, placing her hands on the base of her back.
‘I’d have done the same.’ Harry joins her pregnant friend for a ‘last night of freedom’ hug.
Kiki stands too. ‘I need to find my room.’
I offer her a look. I detect bullshit! ‘I want a word with you.’
‘We’re going – see you tomorrow.’ Danny and Molly leave.
Kiki returns to the bed.
‘I saw Declan earlier… He sort of asked me if you were here.’
Kiki’s eyes widen.
‘It’s no secret you both like to shag everything in sight, but please don’t hurt each other.’
‘OK – thanks for the lecture. Anyway, it may not happen.’ Kiki stands, a smirk plastered across her face.
‘Really? You have a plan to take exactly what you want from Declan – please don’t stand there and feed me bullshit. Now go, before I lock you up.’
Kiki takes hold of Harry and pulls her into her arms. ‘Sleep tight, Harry – love you loads.’
‘Don’t start me off again.’ Harry wipes her eyes dry.
‘I had better go too.’ Barney stands.
‘Stay, there’s no rush.’ I put my arm around him, needing a hug.
‘Actually, babe, there’s a cute barman I spoke to when we arrived… When I say “spoke to”, I mean he’s foreign – fuck knows where he’s from.’
‘Not much conversation then.’ I look at him.
‘Who needs to speak when you have something in your mouth?’
‘Barney, you’re a man slut.’ You gotta love Barney.
‘Born and bred… Now then, my needs are great, so I will see my two favourite Harper girls later.’ He kisses us both and leaves.
We both climb into bed, with the duvet tucked up tight below our chins. I begin to channel-hop, trying to find something to eliminate pre-wedding jitters. Sex in the City 2 – perfect. After half an hour, her eyelids are drooping, and Harry finally relents.
I lean over and kiss her cheek. ‘Goodnight, little sis.’
The smoke is everywhere, blurring my vision. I can’t breathe; there’s no air. My head is heavy and my body is motionless. I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe! I can’t breathe! Please.
Suddenly, my eyes open and I gasp for air. Bolting out of bed, I rush to the bathroom and run the cold tap, bathing my face. The water cools my face and trickles down my throat. My breathing remains rapid as I inhale and exhale, trying to calm down.
Christ! How long are these nightmares going to last? Fresh air is what I need.
I grab my coat, slip on my Converse, and exit the room. The hotel is quiet – nobody is awake except for me.
The cold air hits me as I walk outside. I make my way across the snow-covered grass to a nearby bench under a huge oak tree. I use my arm to brush away the dust-covered seat and sit, taking in the perfect view, which goes on for miles. The hotel is a former manor house, located on a small hill.
My fingers automatically clasp my wrist, turning and twisting my beautiful watch. I lower my gaze. It’s seven fifteen. I knew it was early; the sun is still fairly low.
I look into the distance, noticing a male figure wearing a grey hoodie and joggers. He moves towards me.
‘Lovely morning.’
‘It is stunning, Kate.’ Raymond inhales deeply. ‘How is my bride-to-be?’
‘Asleep. Are you nervous?’
‘No.’ He looks away. I agree – I don’t see a man full of nerves; in fact, quite the opposite.
‘I could sit here forever. However, the bride will be waking up, so I’d better get back.’ I stand and brush the dusting of snow from my coat.
‘Can you give my wife-to-be a kiss from me and tell her I will see her in a few hours?’
I reach up and give him a kiss. ‘It will be my pleasure. She’s crazy in love with you, Raymond… Super-crazy.’
He laughs. ‘I promise to look after her.’ Raymond looks at me with complete sincerity.
‘I know you will. OK – wish me luck.’
‘Harry… Wake up.’ I move her mussed dark hair from her face. ‘Harry!’ Nothing. ‘Oi! Mrs Raymond Leclair, wake up.’ A smile spreads across her face.
‘It’s here! Oh my God.’ She rolls onto her stomach and screams into her pillow, and at the very same time there is a knock at the door.
‘That’ll be our breakfast. Up you get.’ I move towards the door.
Harry strolls in to the living area, tying her robe around her. ‘Smells good; I’m starving.’
‘I ordered the biggest breakfast on the menu.’
‘I’m going on a diet forever once today is over.’
‘You’ll be fine, you haven’t eaten that much!’ I chuckle. ‘I saw your hubby-to-be, walking in the field. I tell you what, he’s as cool as a cucumber.’
‘I can’t think about it.’
‘What! Raymond?’
‘No, husband-to-be… Shit! This is it.’
‘You’re not walking down the aisle to die. “This is it” is a bit dramatic.’
Harry pushes her plate away. ‘I don’t think I can eat.’
‘I have something for you.’ I stand, move to the bedroom and return with a couple of gift bags. ‘Here.’
Her eyes glaze over.
‘No more tears.’
‘Then don’t buy me surprise gifts.’
The first present is in a purple box with silver writing saying Asprey of London. She opens the box to reveal a diamond solitaire necklace, almost identical to mine – which was another birthday gift from Luke. Harry places her hand over her mouth.
‘Oh my God, it’s stunning. I don’t know what to say. Thank you.’
‘I knew you liked mine.’ I lean on the table, enjoying my view of a happy Harry.
‘It’s too mu
ch, you’ve given me so much.’ She fastens it around her neck, running her fingers across the chain towards the diamond. ‘I’m going to wear it today, to keep you with me.’
‘You don’t have to wear it today. I wanted to get you something – a keepsake of us.’ Wow, today is going to be harder than I thought. ‘Open the other gift.’
She quickly removes the lid of a black box and empties a velvet bag into the palm of her hand. It’s a gold locket. She opens the catch to reveal two baby pictures – us.
‘Where did you get this?’ she asks.
‘I found it in the boxes from Ivor’s house. Katenka wore this on her wedding day.’
‘How come Ivor had it?’
I shrug. ‘I don’t know. If I ever see him again, I’ll ask.’
Harry reaches for my hand. ‘You should keep this.’
‘No, I want you to have it.’ Christ, this hurts.
‘I wish you had Ivor – good or bad, I wish he was part of your life… This is so messed-up.’
‘I guess… But let’s not worry about it today – today is going to be the best.’ I raise my glass of fresh orange. ‘Here’s to eternal happiness for my little sis and her French hubby, a shit-hot wedding, and not forgetting a happy Christmas Eve.’
‘Cheers… To weddings and Santa.’ We both laugh.
‘Have you thought about talking to Dad yet? I know you wanted to wait until after the wedding.’
She shakes her head. ‘Either way it’s crappy. Oh, by the way, Dad we know you knocked up Katenka… Or letting him think we both don’t belong to him. Besides, he clams up whenever I mention the adoption. How the hell am I going to bring it up?’
‘He doesn’t mention it to me either. But I’m sure he would want to know. Anyhow, we really don’t know what happened between them – Ivor made assumptions, that’s all.’
‘Maybe… I’ve decided to talk to him when I get back from France.’
‘I’m here for you, whatever you decide, OK?’
‘What about the grave?’ Harry asks.
‘Are you ready to visit?’ Will I ever be ready to say hello and goodbye to Katenka?
‘No,’ Harry whispers.
‘Me neither. I guess she’s not going anywhere – I mean, it’s a bloody grave. Right here, right now is for the living. And speaking of which, you need to get ready.’
‘Harry, you need to get your dress on.’ I look at my watch. There’s forty minutes until kick-off.
Harry appears from the bathroom kitted out in the most beautiful white lingerie set.
Barney wolf-whistles. ‘Harriet Harper, you sexy little slut.’
‘Barney!’ Harry slaps him. ‘A slut? You cheeky git.’
‘You look hot – tell Raymond to use his teeth to get you naked,’ Kiki the nympho responds in true Kiki fashion.
‘You two and your one-track minds, you’re bloody exhausting! Kiki, help me with the dress. So, how was Declan last night?’ I ask.
‘All I can say is he’s good in the sack.’ Kiki smiles. Crap! It’s not just a satisfied smile, but one that confirms she has feelings for him. Oh boy, this is not looking good!
‘Enough sex talk, let’s get Harry into her wedding dress. Barney, keep Mum entertained. She’s going to be a mess when she sees Harry.’
‘Got it, babe.’ He leaves us to it.
Kiki and I take hold of Harry’s dress, allowing enough room for Harry to step in the centre.
‘Ready to look like a meringue?’ I ask.
Harry laughs. ‘As I’ll ever be.’
I hold her hands as Kiki helps guide her feet to the bottom of the dress, then I slide the dress up and over her body. I then begin the painstaking job of fastening the individual buttons that hold the diamante-encrusted bodice in place.
‘Bloody hell, Harry, Raymond may have to rip this off you. Don’t let him drink too much, otherwise you’ll be sleeping in this tonight,’ Kiki says.
I move to see the bride – and what a view! I clap and jump. ‘Oh my God! You look stunning. And I mean bloody stunning. Mum and Dad are going to melt.’
‘I can’t speak,’ Kiki says.
‘That’s a first. You like it?’ Harry brushes her hands down the bodice.
‘Gorgeous, you look…’ There are no more words from Kiki, just a thumbs-up, and tears rolling down her cheeks.
‘Let’s attach your veil and then you’re done.’
The diamond tiara sits neatly below her veil, and her dark hair hangs down her back. Lastly, she puts on her Louboutins: I crawl under her dress and slide them onto her feet.
All that remains is for the three of us, and my plus-one, Barney, to dress for the day.
‘Molly, sit down and I’ll put your shoes on.’ I lift one foot at a time. ‘How do they feel? Tell me if they hurt.’
I help her up.
‘Not too bad – at the moment.’
The four of us look in the mirror. Barney wears his penguin suit as any Italian Vogue model would… He looks hot. Our dresses are simple: black strapless and full-length. Except for Molly’s, which has an extra panel at the front for her expanding bump.
We all make our way down the grand staircase, Barney on one side of Molly and me on the other. We reach Harry and Dad. Barney walks towards Mum, ready to link her arm through his.
‘This is it, girls.’ I place Harry’s white fur stole over her shoulders and rearrange her veil. Kiki places Molly’s black stole over her shoulders, and we do the same.
I pass Harry her elegant bouquet of white roses tied with a white sash, and take two more hand-tied bouquets of mistletoe, which I pass to Kiki and Molly. I take mine too. We’re ready for Harriet Harper’s final walk.
We exit the large glass doors of the hotel reception. I can feel a sense of trepidation in the air: Harriet is the first in our pack to get hitched. The air is cold and the ground remains covered in white powdery snow: the scene is picturesque.
After a short walk, we arrive at the small church in the grounds of the venue.
‘This is it… ready?’ I nervously say.
Harry nods. Taking in a deep breath, she touches her diamond necklace, perhaps to give her strength.
‘Ready.’ I inform the wedding organiser waiting at the door.
The music begins. Mum and Barney are the first to enter. Next are Molly and Kiki.
Harry turns to me. ‘Love you,’ she whispers.
Dad strides in first, Harry on his arm. They walk slowly, in time to the music. A narrow walkway hides them from view at first, then they turn a corner and the congregation gets their first glimpse of Harry.
The church is old and dark, but the soft glow of the sun seeping through the stained glass windows waterfalls across the bride. I follow close behind her and listen to the gasps of the congregation, agreeing that Harry looks every inch the most beautiful bride.
All eyes are on Harry as she floats effortlessly towards the altar.
I look ahead, and my eyes lock with his. For a split second we’re alone. I take a deep breath. Dark and captivating meet dark and spellbound…
6
‘I now pronounce you man and wife.’ The vicar smiles and looks at the congregation.
The noise ripples inside the church: waves of cheers and celebratory whistles. Harry and Raymond sign the register and then take their first steps as a married couple, followed by Mum and Dad, and Raymond’s parents. It’s my turn to leave. I clasp the best man’s hand. My fingers link with his, shooting a current through my core. How can he maintain this level of power over me?
He leans towards my ear. ‘You look stunning.’
My hand grips him tightly as we walk slowly down the aisle. We exit the church and swiftly move towards a large tree, away from all the guests. I have no time to think as his lips meet mine, accepting his firm, yet soft, tongue. My need for
this moment – for him – is strong, and he knows it.
I pull away as my eyes dance with his. We don’t need words; a silent understanding floats between us.
‘Did you have another nightmare?’
I nod. ‘It’s always the same when you’re not with me.’
Luke takes my face in his hands. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t be. I’m just your crazy girlfriend who can’t live without you.’
‘I like crazy.’ His lips skim my forehead, before he begins to grin.
‘What’s up?’
‘Nothing.’
‘Are you withholding information, Sutton? I know that look.’
‘You can always read me.’
‘Bet your arse I can.’
At last, we return to the hotel. With a Winter Pimms in my hand, my body begins to thaw and relax.
Luke pulls me to one side. ‘I have something to show you.’
‘Really! And what might that be?’ I can’t help but laugh.
‘My insatiable Kate is with me this afternoon… Are you feeling greedy? Baby, you’ll have to wait.’
I tap his arm. ‘Oi, I’m not greedy! You, on the other hand, always want to show me something that involves a certain body part.’ I fold my arms.
‘Point taken… Let me rephrase that: I do have something to show you that doesn’t involve my body. But later will be a very different story.’ He seductively arches his brow. Crap! I’ve gone, melted to the floor.
Luke guides me to an empty room at the rear of the hotel. Suddenly I see Max. Max! What’s he doing here? I thought he was still in Switzerland with James Sullivan, where he’s been recovering ever since the explosion. Oh my God! My heart beats rapidly as I find out I can run in Louboutins! My arms link around Max’s neck as tears roll down my cheeks.
‘Jesus, Kate.’ Max steadies himself as I almost knock him flying.
I stand back and take his hands. ‘Let me look at you.’ My eyes close for a second, which is all the time I need to remember Max lying on the driveway next to the remains of Luke’s Range Rover.
‘I’m back in one piece.’
‘You look like… you. Christ, you’ve been gone – how long?’
