by Ella Miles
I won’t let him.
I have to stop him.
“Black,” I yell from the darkness of the alleyway.
He stops, turning slowly as if he heard the voice of a ghost. But I’m no ghost, just a woman whose voice he never thought he’d hear again. Even though the night is dark, the moonlight barely providing enough light for us to see each other—we see everything. The blackness of the night isn’t enough to blind us.
I can see his eyes that were glazed over with determination, soften into tight balls of lust as he sees me. His lips tighten, and his throat closes at the sight of me as if he can’t decide whether he is pleased or angry that I’m here.
I feel much the same. My heart races, begging to run and jump into his arms and forget what I must do, while my brain is pissed. He’s here when he should be locked away at home where it’s safe so that tomorrow he can form a plan to once again grow strong and protect the world from dark men like Milo Wallace.
The valet drives his car away, leaving Enzo and me to stand in the moonlit night. We don’t speak, but our bodies say enough—come here so I can fuck you. Our eyes say more—get the fuck away before Milo finds you.
Stay so I can fuck you. Leave so I know you will be safe.
Neither of us will leave without convincing from the other. And our hearts won’t stop until we’ve had each other.
But for a second, I think Enzo is going to walk inside. He might think that would be enough to keep me outside, but I will never give up. Not as long as I love him. He doesn’t realize how much pain it would cause me to know the devil took him while I remained free. I wouldn’t really be free if Enzo was caged. I would be in my own personal hell. And maybe after he hears the truth, he will let me save him.
Enzo must realize that ignoring me and walking inside won’t stop me. Or the pull we share overrides any rational thoughts he has, because instead of heading inside, he walks toward me.
We don’t speak when Enzo stops a step away from me in the dark alley. Close enough to reach out and touch, but far enough away I can’t feel the heat from his breath.
Neither of us has to tell each other why we are here. We both know. To make a deal with Milo Wallace. To protect the other person. To sacrifice our life for love.
Neither of us has ever said we love the other. My feelings are strong; I love Enzo in broad daylight even though I have yet to say the words to him. He knows my feelings. Everyone knows.
But Enzo doesn’t broadcast his feelings. Most people would say how he acts is love, but I know better. He isn’t capable of love. His father broke him of that ability long ago.
Still love is why we are here, and love is why we will both lose everything.
I open my mouth to speak first. I have to be careful with my words because this will be my only chance to keep Enzo from Milo’s grasp.
But Enzo’s mouth comes down on mine before I get a single syllable out. It’s a hungry kiss that feels as much as an attack as a kiss. Our teeth clash as if we haven’t been kissing each other every day for months now. Our lips devour each other, and our tongues do battle in our mouths, yelling at each other with our angry pants instead of our words.
His hand tangles in my hair, pulling hard as his fingers fist into the long strands, jerking my head back so he can look me in the eyes.
“Dammit, stingray,” he says, using the nickname Zeke gave me.
“Don’t you dare!” He doesn’t get to use Zeke to get me to do what he wants. “Keep Zeke out of this.”
“I can’t. Just like you can’t. I will use whatever means necessary to keep you safe.”
I shove him hard and watch him stumble into the brick wall. Not because of my strength, but because he wants me to attack. He wants me emotional and out of control. He wants me vulnerable so he can persuade me to run and live, while he gives everything to Milo.
Enzo doesn’t realize the more I open my heart to my emotions, the more my feelings for him will pour out of me. As it is, my love for him eats at my soul, burrowing deeper into my bones until there is nothing left of me but my love for him.
“You should run,” he says, but I don’t think he’s warning me because he thinks I should run from Milo. He’s warning me to run from him. Because what he’s going to do to me is anything but sweet.
I arch an eyebrow as I lean forward—our bodies close, but not touching. The whirling sensations bounce back and forth between our bodies. Pulling us closer to each other until we all but collide. “You should run,” I threaten.
He sucks in a breath like he’s breathing every ounce of me in. Like the breath is enough for him.
I smirk. “Got what you needed?”
“Fuck, never.” He grabs my neck and pulls me the last inch into his body. My soft body connects with his hard. And I melt into his arms. I’ve been trying to be brave, trying to do the right thing to save him, but right now, I don’t have to do the right thing. I can do the wrong thing—the very wrong, dirty, naughty thing.
His tongue dances in my mouth, exploring like it’s been months instead of hours since our last kiss. And my hungry growls at each intrusion prove I’m in the same desperate state as Enzo is.
“Miss me, stingray?”
My eyes flood with emotions each fucking time he calls me stingray.
Dammit.
I bite his lip as punishment for him playing with my emotions.
He chuckles gently, but I know that is the last gentle thing he is going to give me. I can feel his hardening cock pressing into my stomach, matching every other inch of hardness on his body.
He spins us around until my body is against the brick, and he has me trapped between his hips and arms caging me in. His lips come down on mine again, but he stops short of brushing against my lips again.
I whimper, needing him more than I’ve ever needed him before. My emotions are raw, broken, and out for him to easily pick up on, even if he wasn’t already good at reading my feelings.
But I can tell from the dark heat of his eyes, that he needs to talk before he fucks me.
“I let you go. I set you free, and what do you do? You get captured five-seconds after I let you go. Why, stingray?” his voice drops as he says the last words.
I swallow the lump down. “Because I was never truly free. I left part of me behind when you set me free.”
My lips come down on his roughly, shutting him up. Stop talking Enzo, fuck me…and then let me keep you safe.
This time, the kiss is enough to drag him under the spell I’m already under myself.
His calloused hand darts under my shirt and over my scared stomach. The touch of his warmth sends delicious shivers through my cold body. And I know the simple contact of my skin against his does the same to him.
What I wouldn’t give for a bed right now. We are in a dark alleyway. Anyone could walk by and spot us. We won’t be getting naked. I won’t get to relish every part of his broken, perfect body. I won’t get to kiss over every ripple of muscle. I won’t get to lay against his chest until our breathing has regulated to each other's. I won’t get any of the things that usually comes with sex.
But I will get everything I need—Enzo. I’ll get Enzo. Something I never thought I’d have again.
His fingers brush against my nipples. I’m not wearing a bra. I almost never do and the way Enzo looks at me when he realizes it always sends a shot of electricity from where he touches me to my toes.
“What part of yourself did you leave?” Enzo asks, kissing my neck as he fists my hair, pulling my head back to give him access.
“Mmm,” I moan as he thrusts his cock hard against me. I should have worn heels so I could feel his cock against my clit, instead of against my stomach.
Enzo reads my mind as always and lifts me up so his cock can sink between my legs like I need. We are both still wearing jeans, but the fabric separating us doesn’t matter. We don’t let something as simple as clothing prevent us from being together.
I tangle my hand in his thick dark
hair as his rough stubble brushes against my neck, and he continues to kiss me, hoping to pull all my secrets from me. But I only have one secret left, and he can’t pull it from me.
“Tell me, stingray,” he nibbles on my ear.
“Fuck me, Enzo,” I say, ignoring his request.
His eyes look torn between what his cock wants to do and what he needs me to say. But I know which will win, at least for now.
I grab his jeans and undo the button and pull down the zipper. I reach inside and grab his thick cock, hurrying his decision along to stop questioning me and fuck me instead.
He growls as I fist his cock hard in my palm, gripping him harder than I probably should. But the effect is what I was hoping for.
Enzo practically rips my jeans from my body. “You really should wear more dresses. Easier access,” he moans.
I chuckle. “I like making you work hard for me.”
His thumb flicks against my clit. And I forget any words I was planning on saying. I forget the reason we are in this alleyway in the first place. The zing zipping through my body at the single touch is too much and not enough at the same time.
I hear a car alarm go off in the distance. I hear people talking as they approach where we hide in the dark alleyway as Enzo plays with my clit. He slows as voices approach.
“Don’t you dare stop,” I whisper, my breathing already getting heavy and wanting.
His tongue licks slowly and torturously over my bottom lip. “I don’t plan on stopping.”
I feel his cock pushing hard between my legs as he continues stroking my clit with his fingers, pulling my slickness from my body and drenching his waiting and impatient cock between my thighs.
“Don’t scream,” he whispers into my ear.
And then his cock slides into me, and I’m full to the helm.
I can’t help it. I scream out his name.
I hear the voices stop suddenly as if they spotted us in the darkness. I don’t care if they see what we are doing. This isn’t about them. This is about us.
No, stop heart. There is no us. This is goodbye.
The voices and footsteps hurry off as Enzo pounds into me.
I feel all of him. His hands are gripping my ass, his cock pounding into the perfect spot in my body, and his lips kissing me as we pant everything into each other.
I don’t care about the bricks driving into my back with each thrust. I don’t care about the people that keep walking by with their eyes cutting to us; they can’t see us in the dark. They can only hear the moans of two people so desperate to protect the other that they are willing to give up their life. And I sure as hell don’t care that Milo is probably already in the building across the street, waiting for us.
“Why aren’t you free?” Enzo pants, somehow able to form words even though he’s fucking me with the desperation of a dying man.
He’s not going to let this go. I run my hands down his back to his ass, pulling him deeper inside of me, needing him to focus on this and nothing more. His jeans still cling to his body, and I can feel the metal of his gun, but also something else. More sharp metal—two circles.
If this was any other time, I would think Enzo was planning on being kinky. He hasn’t brought a whole lot of toys into the bedroom; we don’t need them. He can show me exactly how kinky and dark he is without the toys. But I can read his mind instantly, and I know why he brought handcuffs with him tonight—and they sure as hell aren’t to tie Milo up.
But I shut away my thoughts instantly, because I know as easily as I can read his thoughts, he can read mine. So I only let my thoughts break the surface, and I let myself fall into his plan. He wants the truth; I’ll give him the truth.
“Truth or lie…” I start as he keeps thrusting inside of me. I should get a medal for being able to get any coherent words out with him driving into me so deliciously, hitting every nerve ending in my body. All I would have to do to come is relax, but I’m not ready to let go of Enzo yet. I’m not ready.
“You knew Milo was still alive when you freed me,” I finish.
“Truth,” he says.
More thrusts, more kisses, more desperation.
“We are both here for the same reason,” I say. We are both here to convince Milo to take us and not the other.
“Truth.”
His thrusting gets faster and faster. Our breathing is light and heavy and fast. The pounding in my chest is erratic and unstoppable. We are both so close to coming I don’t know how we haven’t fallen over the cliff and into the sweet release of orgasm yet. The only thing stopping us is how desperately we are holding onto each other. And how much Enzo is dying for my truth.
My mouth needs his for one last moment that doesn’t end in betrayal. For one last moment where I’m his.
The kiss is everything it should be. It’s wet, and delicious, and sinful. My kiss says everything I’m about to say and everything I’m not.
When he kisses me harder, I whimper louder, pretending the kiss hurts me because I know how Enzo will react. He won’t let me suffer a single second of pain.
He spins us around, holding me to him as he slows his thrust. His strong arms hold me up as I reach behind him carefully, and then I drop my truth.
“I love you, Enzo Black.”
He doesn’t answer with words. He doesn’t clarify if it is a truth or lie—he knows. He’s always known this is my truth. He knows it’s why I’m not free. Because a piece of my heart belongs to him. And I will never be able to get it back.
We orgasm together in one powerful moment. The moment is everything. Because for the first time we made love instead of just fucking. And it happened when we were half dressed, standing in a dark and dirty alleyway where people caught glimpses of the moment.
Maybe it should have been in a bed with clean white sheets, champagne, and flowers. But that isn’t who we are.
We are dark.
We are dirty.
We are filthy.
We aren’t hearts and roses people. I’d always rather be fucked in a bathroom in a moment of passion than in a soft bed. And I will always want the love of my life to be a little bad than a flawless good-doer who has never been wrong.
Because I’m not a good girl, I’m the girl who used to steal to survive. And I’d rather be bad with a man than fall for a good man. Maybe my heart is darker than I thought.
And my heart is going to break with what I’m about to do next. Enzo is still inside me. His release is filling me as his orgasm still escapes him. He didn’t wear a condom, and even if I thought I could get pregnant, I wouldn’t care. This was too perfect a moment to stop with any barrier between us.
“I love you,” I say again, because I know it makes him vulnerable. It makes me vulnerable too. It opens my heart for him and if last time I left a piece, I’m about to give Enzo every-fucking-thing.
I don’t expect Enzo to say it back. So I don’t wait for him to. Even if he feels that emotion, he would never say it. He can’t.
And I can’t let him sacrifice everything for me.
I need him safe. I love him. Nothing else matters to me. We both decided Milo Wallace couldn’t be defeated with guns and weapons and storming men. And despite how strong the Black empire is, when Milo gathers all our enemies to fight, we won’t be strong enough to defeat them all at once. And we won’t let our men die for our personal drama.
Our empire is vulnerable. And one of us has to save it. One of us has to get to Milo. One of us has to be on the inside, distracting him while the other finds a chink in his armor. One of us has to sacrifice themselves, so the other can win. But isn’t that what the fight for Black has always been?
One loses, sacrificing the job so the other can rule.
I kiss Enzo hard, telling him goodbye with my lips, and then I do it. I don’t know if I will get away with it before he realizes what I’m doing. But the glaze over his eyes, the heavy breathing of his chest, and his cock still resting inside of me says this is my last chance to save the ma
n I love.
I grab the handcuffs while still kissing him. Then I attach one to his hand and then the other to the metal pipe running up the brick building.
Enzo’s eyes fly open when he realizes what I did.
I dig into his pocket, finding the key. I toss it quickly away so he can’t force me to give it to him.
And then I slide off his cock.
His dangerous eyes darken, and I see the fear behind them he’s masking with anger.
“Stingray,” he says softly. “What did you do?”
I take a step back as I pull my jeans up, covering my body. “The same thing you planned on doing—I saved you.”
He exhales, and the anger is gone.
“I couldn’t let the man I love sacrifice himself to Milo. Don’t hate me for this.”
He stands like a statue. “I could never hate you.”
He still doesn’t say he loves me, but it doesn’t matter. I know I will never hear those words fall from his lips, but he got to hear them from me. He will get to take my words with him when he finally gets free and finds me gone.
I glance behind me at the club where I will be meeting Milo and giving him everything he’s ever wanted. He will have me—a woman that could have been a queen. A woman he thinks he’ll be able to use to get the power of Black. Milo will be wrong though; he’ll only get my body, never Black. Never Enzo.
And for the first time, I feel no fear at that. Seeing Enzo again assured me I am doing the right thing.
I look back at Enzo. “Thank you for keeping me trapped. Hold onto my heart and keep it safe for me.”
“I promise to keep your heart safe.”
“Thank you.”
His eyes dim. “I promise to keep you safe, Kai.”
I swallow hard as what is left of my heart clenches. I shake my head. “Just my heart. Let me protect you for once.”
“Never.”
I glance at the handcuffs holding him to the building. “It doesn’t look like you have much of a choice.”
“I always have a choice.”
“Then choose my heart. Because if you let Milo take you my heart will belong to him too. And I want my heart safe. I want my love safe. Protect it, always. Promise me.”
