by Ella Miles
But if she doesn’t want me to say the name tonight, I won’t.
“Fuck me,” she says again, grabbing my hips to pull toward her.
My cock rests between her legs, but I’m not sure I can enter her without her push. I don’t want to hurt her after what she went through.
She reaches up to my neck, and starts kissing me, and we both forget. We get lost in the kiss. I can’t get close enough to her. Closer and closer our tongues slip inside. Our chests press together. And…
…then I’m inside her.
As if I’ve always belonged inside her. As if nothing has changed. It feels as spiritual as any other time I’ve fucked her. She is still my home.
I rock, and she moans in delight.
Kai is still mine.
Everything else disappears. And only us exist. This wonderful connection Kai and I share is back in full force. We just needed this connection of our bodies to find it again.
I fuck her slow.
I fuck her fast.
She fucks me back.
Time moves differently, but eventually, she comes, and then I do too, in a beautiful ending to the worst story of my life.
But when I pull out of her, everything changes. And I realize that wasn’t a welcoming home. That was a goodbye.
I hold her in my arms, trying to get the feeling back, but it doesn’t come. And as she closes her eyes and drifts off, I realize the darkness is still upon us. And that darkness is stronger than ever before.
27
Kai
Milo…
“No!”
“Stop!”
.
.
.
“Shut up, whore.”
I shut up. It’s easier if I’m quiet.
.
.
.
“Now, I’m going to tell you a story. About me and my brothers: my half brother, Enzo; my twin brother, Pietro; and my younger brother, Felix.”
28
Enzo
“Kai has been like this for hours. I can’t wake her up,” I say to the doctor.
Langston and Liesel are standing behind me looking horrified as we all stare down at Kai, lying in the bed, clearly in torment. At first, I thought she was just having a nightmare, but then I couldn’t wake her up.
I tried shaking, talking, yelling, tapping, sitting her up, pouring water over her, nothing worked.
The doctor ignores me and continues to check her over. He listens to her heart for a few more minutes, and then he looks at the three of us waiting for answers.
“Everyone deals with extreme situations differently. And this is how she is handling the trauma. When she was experiencing it, her brain must not have processed everything that was happening to her the first time. Something triggered the trauma, and she’s processing it all now.”
I triggered her, by fucking her.
I run my hand through my hair. “What can we do?”
He looks from me to her. “I can sedate her, which would put her into a deeper sleep and get rid of the nightmares, but—”
“Do it,” I say. I need her pain to stop.
“But this could keep happening over and over until her brain has processed what has happened to her. It may be better to just let her body run its course,” the doctor continues.
“Sedate her,” I say.
“Enzo, take a second and think about what Kai would want. She’s never shied away from dealing with her pain. Maybe you should let her body do its thing. And when this is over, then she can work on healing in a healthy way,” Liesel says.
“Fuck!” I yell, hoping somehow that it will wake Kai up, because I don’t want to make the decision.
“Give her twenty-four-hours to rest in her own way. Process what happened as it comes. Then we can make a decision to either sedate her or wake her up. I’ve given her some pain medication, so either way, she won’t be in physical pain,” the doctor says, getting up.
Langston and Liesel thank him, but I just go and sit next to Kai.
Milo is gone. His empire is in shambles. And there is no threat of a successor to take his place. Kai is safe.
But I can’t save her from her nightmares. And I can’t protect her from her past.
“Tell me what to do, stingray. Tell me what to do.”
29
Kai
In.
Out.
No, stop focusing on what he’s doing.
.
.
.
I scream.
I cry.
I lose my mind, and Milo wants to tell me a fucking story while he rapes me. But maybe his words will be what will help me survive.
“My father didn’t visit Felix, Pietro, or me often, but when he did, it shook us all to our core. We all knew he had another family. His real family out there. We were just his spares. The ones he kept hidden in case his first son wasn’t strong enough to take over his empire.”
More thrusts. No focus on his words, not what he is doing.
“Pietro was the oldest by two minutes, so father focused on grooming him the most. Father thought he would make a good replacement for Enzo, if Enzo were to fail. But that didn’t mean Felix or I were off the hook. We all had to be ready. And he promised us our own, smaller empire he would help us build in Italy if Enzo were to succeed.”
Milo’s fingers claw at my hips too harshly, and I cry out. I thought I could shut him out, but it’s impossible.
I’m not going to survive this.
.
.
.
The back of my head hits the ground now with every thrust. Tears still sting my eyes. And his story continues.
“One year, when we were thirteen, he came back. It was the last time. And he brought Enzo. I don’t think he knew who we were, but we knew who he was. The heir. The chosen one. The only son our father truly loved.”
.
.
.
This has to end!
My tears have stopped. And my muscles shiver with weakness and shock.
Please, stop.
“We soon realized why Enzo was here. Our father had a final test. One where Enzo could prove he was truly worthy of being his heir. Father handed him a gun. And said choose.”
I gasp, my eyes flying to Milo’s filled with pain.
“Pietro and I were the closest. We were twins. We did everything together.”
Milo cries.
And my eyes drip for the boy. The boy whose father broke him. And the man I love who played his part.
“Enzo didn’t even blink. He lifted the gun and shot Pietro. He was just a kid—just thirteen.”
His brother was the love of his life. Not a woman. His brother—Pietro.
And for the tiniest of seconds, I understand Milo’s pain. He didn’t deserve that any more than I deserved to be taken and beaten or raped.
But my pain I turned into beauty, his pain he turned into rage. And he’s never been able to escape it.
“Why? Why did you tell me?” I whisper, trying to forget where his cock is right now.
“So you know who the man you love really is. And so you believe me when I tell you the truth.”
30
Enzo
I waited the fucking twenty-four hours, never leaving Kai’s side.
It was the worst hell I’ve been through, watching her seemingly relive her nightmare. And all the time I was hoping I did the right thing. I hoped when she woke up, she would be able to start the journey toward healing.
I even broke my promise and told her I love her, but even that didn’t wake her from her nightmare.
Finally, her nightmare stopped. She woke up. But Kai was gone.
She didn’t speak.
She didn’t look at me.
She didn’t move.
She didn’t eat.
She didn’t breathe.
She didn’t drink.
And sometimes when I look at her sitting there in her chair and looking out t
he yacht window to the ocean, I wish she were asleep again. Because asleep, I still had some hope. But now I have none.
It’s been weeks. Over a month and nothing has changed.
She just sits.
Occasionally, she sleeps.
And Liesel is the only one who can get her to eat.
Otherwise, Kai ignores us all.
I’ve tried everything. The doctor says she just needs time, but I don’t think Kai is even fighting anymore. I’m afraid Milo stole what makes Kai, Kai, and he took her with him to hell. And I’m left with the shell of her body.
But I won’t stop trying. I will never give up on her. And I know the next round of games to become Black is nearing. Maybe that will wake her up. But I doubt she would even show up. And I have no idea if I can legally take over the company if I don’t finish the games and have a child who can claim the throne after me.
I head into Kai’s room. As usual, she is sitting alone, staring out the window.
I take a deep breath, trying to push my own selfish pain away. She doesn’t need to feel my pain. She needs my help.
So I walk over to her and kneel in front of her as I do every day. I want to take her hand, but I hate forcing her to do anything. Although, I’ve broken that promise a few times over the month and a half now.
“I love you, Kai. You are the love of my life, come back to me…”
31
Kai
“Come back to me…” Enzo says.
It’s the same words he says to me every single day.
But I can’t come back.
I’m not the same person.
And Enzo isn’t the person I thought he was. Milo reminded me how many people Enzo has killed. He may have saved many women, but he’s killed more.
I blink, know that was just the conditioning. Milo wants me to hate Enzo. Stop thinking that! I scream at myself.
But I don’t show Enzo any of the turmoil going on inside me. I’m not quiet because of the trauma of what Milo did to me; I’m quiet because I need the quiet to work through the chaos inside my head.
Enzo stays one hour before he can’t be calm anymore. And then he leaves. A few minutes later, Liesel enters the room.
She never goes easy on me. Not like Enzo and Langston do. I haven’t spoken to her, but I’ve heard everything on her mind.
How I need to woman up. How I need to put Enzo out of his misery and just say something, anything. How I’m being a little bit selfish.
But she also says how sorry she is. She cries. She gets mad at Milo and curses him.
And then she smiles at me when she asks me how good it felt to kill him.
I may not answer back, but that doesn’t stop Liesel. And our friendship grows in an unexpected way as she tells me all of her own truths.
About her and Enzo.
About Langston and their weird relationship.
About her apartment.
About how she secretly hates yachts, but don’t tell Enzo that.
About how she wants to get a dog but thinks she is allergic.
About everything on her mind.
And with every truth she tells me, I want to tell her the one that changed me. The single truth that will change everything.
I smile, well two truths.
Liesel notices my smile. “You smiled!” she squeals.
I frown.
And she snaps her hand over her mouth. “Sorry, I shouldn’t get Enzo’s hopes up.” She walks over to the door and closes and locks it before sitting in the chair next to me.
“There, now we are alone. Smile away. Don’t worry, I won’t brag to Enzo that I was the one who got you to smile.” Liesel leans back in her chair.
And I know the only way I’m going to get this out.
“Truth or lie,” I say, my voice breaking.
Liesel leans forward, her mouth drops, and she stares at me blinking, not understanding. But I can be patient. I’ve waited a month to tell anyone my truth. And I only have enough strength for a limited amount of words.
Finally, Liesel says, “You want to play truth or lies with me?”
I nod.
“Okay,” Liesel says, waiting.
“I’m pregnant,” I say.
Liesel gasps and stares at my stomach like I’m already showing. I’m not. It’s only been a month.
“Truth or lie?” I ask.
“Oh, right, the game. Truth—you’re pregnant,” Liesel answers.
I nod.
“The baby is Milo’s.”
“Oh, God, Kai…”
“Truth or lie?”
“Truth?”
I shrug because I don’t know.
“Truth or lie, the baby is Enzo’s,” I say.
“Please, let that be the truth.”
Again, I shrug. Both men fucked me the same night, well Milo raped me ,and Enzo fucked me, but the result could be the same.
“What are you going to do? Are you going to be able to carry the baby if it’s Milo’s?”
I shrug—because I don’t know. This baby will be an heir to a dangerous empire. The baby will be my heir. But the child could also be Enzo’s or Milo’s heir.
If the baby is Milo’s heir, then Felix, the child’s uncle, could try to influence his or her decisions. Felix would want to raise the child in hopes of gaining control over the Black empire.
But it could be worse if it is Enzo’s child. Not for me. I would love to have Enzo’s child, but because of what Milo told me.
.
.
.
“You think you and Enzo are the first two to fall in love while playing to become the king?” Milo laughs.
My eyes widen.
“Every few generations, a woman and a man go head to head, the last time it happened was the worst. They had a child together, got married, and said they would rule together. But the entire organization requires only one person to lead—the strongest. And the competition gives the men faith the strongest will lead them into the worst battles. It gives them faith they will win against any enemy. And so when the competitors fell in love with each other and produced a child who would have no challenger to the throne, potentially growing into a weak, vulnerable leader, the men revolted. They started killing friends and family members the couple loved.
“One by one, the couple watched those they loved die. Each time it shattered their love a little more. Ten people died, but it wasn’t enough to break their love, until they had a child. And that child was killed.”
Fuck.
“So you see, I’m helping you by stealing the love you feel for Enzo from you. You will be so tortured and pained you won’t be able to love him without some serious healing. But you know you won’t deep down. Because the same thing will happen to you. You will never put those you love at risk just so you can love Enzo again. Let me break you. Let me take that love with me when I leave you.”
.
.
.
I grab my stomach. This baby is at risk, and he or she isn’t even born yet. I won’t let a child be born into this world. I won’t let my child fight in some twisted game. I won’t let my child be used as a pawn by Felix. I won’t let my child come between Enzo and me.
Liesel watches me as I let the truth of the situation pass over me. But I don’t tell her the truth. She can see it on my face though, and she knows the torment I’ve been dealing with and the burden I carry.
“Truth or lie? I have a child,” Liesel says.
My eyes shoot to her, and I know immediately she speaks the truth. “Truth.”
She nods.
But I can’t open my mouth to ask the question that will burn with me until I know the answer. Is Enzo her child’s father?
Liesel will tell me if she wants to. It’s none of my business. So I ask a helpful question instead.
“How did you hide it from Enzo?” Because if I decide to keep this baby growing inside me, then the child will never be safe unless I hide it.
“By giving h
im up,” she says through tears.
We sit in silence for a moment as we both cry quietly.
“Truth or lie, I don’t love Enzo Black,” I say.
“Lie,” Enzo says, and I jump.
I don’t know how he got through the locked door, but he’s standing watching the two of us with confusion on his face. He clearly didn’t hear the earlier part of our conversation.
“Truth,” I say, breaking his heart.
And for the first time since I fell for Enzo, I’m speaking the truth. I don’t love Enzo. Milo twisted my feelings. He stole my love. And my unborn child filled that void.
With hard work and time, I could get Enzo’s love back. But in this fucked up world we were born into, I can’t love them both and keep them both alive. So I know I will never try to get the love I feel for Enzo back. I’ll choose not to heal. And in doing so, I will keep my baby, and Enzo, safe.
The End
* * *
Thank you so much for reading! Kai and Enzo’s story continues in Possessed by Lies!
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Also by Ella Miles
TRUTH OR LIES (Coming 2019):
Lured by Lies #0.5
Taken by Lies #1
Betrayed by Truths #2
Trapped by Lies #3
Stolen by Truths #4
Possessed by Lies #5
Consumed by Truths #6
DIRTY SERIES:
