by Hannah Gray
I lean down and put my lips to her ear. “Have you had enough dancing yet?”
She rolls her eyes. “Trent, it isn’t that bad. Besides, sure seems like you’re enjoying yourself.” She looks down at the very noticeable bulge in my jeans.
I pull her closer and tip my head down so that my lips are near her ear. “Oh, I am enjoying myself. So much that, now, I need to take you upstairs to my bed.”
I feel her shiver against me. Her chest rises and falls, turning me on more as I watch those perky, full mounds—which are exposed way more than normal—strain against her shirt.
She stands on her tiptoes and presses her mouth to mine, resting her hand on my chest. “Let’s go back to my dorm though. Not with everyone here.”
“The music is so loud; no one will hear. I’ll lock my door. I can’t take the ten-minute drive. I need to be inside of you. Now.”
She bites her lip and nods. “Okay, let’s go. Let me just find Anna and let her know.”
I nod my chin in Red’s direction. She’s dancing with a bunch of girls, surprisingly no sign of Mason. Red is clearly drunk. I watch her encounter with Cam. She laughs hysterically and stumbles around.
Cameran turns toward me. “I think I’d better take her home.”
“I am n-n-not goin’ home yet! Let me dance loooonnngerrr. Don’t be a party pooper!”
I step forward. “Leave her be. We’ll check on her in a bit, and I’ll see where Mason is.”
She’s hesitant, but she follows me toward the stairs. I spot Mason with his back to us, and his hand is pressed against the wall. Tucked between the wall and Mason is a petite brunette. His head is tipped down. He’s sweet-talking her for sure. I’ve seen Mason pick up countless girls. This is just that.
I slap him on the shoulder, and his head whips around.
I lean in, so his company won’t hear me. “Red’s pretty fucked up, man.”
His eyes crinkle slightly at the sides. “And?”
Before I can say anything, Cameran pokes me in the side. “Trent, I can handle her. I’ll take her home.”
Mason shakes his head. “No, it’s fine. I got it. I invited her. And she’s probably drunk because I pissed her off. I’ll handle it.”
She touches his forearm with her hand. “Are you sure? She’s my roommate and best friend. I can get her home. If you, uh, have plans.” Her eyes awkwardly find the brunette.
“Nah, it’s cool. This isn’t really what I should be doing anyway. Later, guys.” With that, he stalks onto the dance floor.
I pull Cam’s arm, and we head upstairs.
With the sound system playing downstairs, there’s no way anyone could hear Sunshine’s sweet whimpers as I pound into her over and over again. The way her back arches when I kiss her in the right spots. Those perky, perfect mounds bouncing. She’s sexier than a goddamn porn star. I always grab a handful of her mess of hair flowing down her back and tug lightly. That always earns me a moan. So. Fucking. Hot.
We lay, tangled up in the bed. Both finally satisfied with the amount of times we were able to get off. Though, if I’m being honest, it will never be enough. I could never tire of this girl.
She traces one of my tattoos on my forearm. “Why did you get this?” she speaks softly. Her fingers gently brush over the moon’s shape and the dead trees and then skate over to the crows.
I shrug and give her the best answer I can think of that will make sense. “Because it’s dark. It’s a moon. And ugly, mean crows. The trees are dead. The whole thing signifies death and darkness.”
She thinks of her response for a moment. “And you think that’s how you are … dark?”
I shrug. “I guess so. Everything always seemed sort of black and white. No color, you know? I’ve just been here, I guess. I know my purpose is football, but other than that, I’ve never felt much of a reason in life. I’m not contributing, and I’m not living. Or at least, I wasn’t.” I squeeze her lightly. “I am now though. And I see things differently.”
“How many tattoos do you have all together?”
I chuckle. “Too many to count.” My sleeve was many different sessions, so I actually have no idea.
“I wish I had one. Maybe one day.”
I pull the sheets off of her body, revealing her bare chest, and pull her on top of me. “Maybe.”
And then, somehow, my body gets the need for her again. I don’t know how long she’ll stick around this time, so I don’t deprive it. I dive back into her.
thirty-six
Cameran
The past few weeks have flown by in a flash. Between juggling classes, shifts at The Atlantic, and my pretty amazing sex life, I’ve been keeping busy.
Thanksgiving is next week, and I have no idea what I am doing. As much as I would like to spend it with Trent, I am not sure if that’s pushing whatever limits we have. I mean, we hang out as much as normal couples do. We have sex as much—wait, probably more than normal couples do—and I honestly can’t imagine life without him in it.
But he hasn’t brought up the L-word, and I haven’t either. I think he’s scared because of how much I have sabotaged us in the past. Not that I can blame him. I know I have problems with commitment. It worries me. Not because I am scared to be tied down. But because I’m scared he’ll leave me after I get used to having him around. Let’s be real; I’m already at that point. I am so damn in love with this man; it’s not even funny.
I walk out of my last class before break. I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn to see a very uncomfortable Carter.
“Hey, Cam. I haven’t seen you much at work,” he says and nervously runs his hand through his dark hair.
Slipping my phone into my pocket, I try to smile and not look as uncomfortable as I feel. “Hey, Carter. I know. My schedule’s changed these past few weeks. Some of my days ended up working better with the other girls, so they asked me to switch.”
He nods his head. “Makes sense.” After a few awkward beats, he looks around. “So, uh, this is kind of weird, but I’m just wondering, did I do something wrong?”
I scrunch my forehead. “No, not at all. Why would you think that?”
His energy shifts. “Well, that night I gave you a ride home, you kissed me. I thought … I don’t know … I figured, maybe you felt the same way that I do.”
His answer leaves my mouth agape.
Shit, shitty, shit, shit, shit.
I completely forgot to tell Trent about that minor thing happening. Okay, maybe I didn’t forget because I had planned on it. But then I put it off. And then I honestly did forget. Must have not been too memorable, huh?
“Okay, Carter, first off, you kissed me.”
He interrupts me, “You didn’t stop me. In fact, you seemed pretty into it.”
I’m beginning to see why Trent was always warning me that Carter wasn’t as nice as he tried to seem.
“Okay. I did allow you to kiss me, and I probably did kiss you back,” I explain.
“You did,” he says smugly before I can say the rest.
“Okay, yes, I’ll give you that. I didn’t push you away. I was confused. But I’m sorry that I sent you mixed signals, Carter. Don’t get me wrong. I like you as a friend, just not like that. And I am sorry for the confusion. Truly.”
“Friends,” he answers coldly. “All right then. I guess I’ll see you around. But, Cameran?”
I almost don’t even want to answer. I know whatever he says next will be bad.
“Yes?” I breathe out. I’m over this conversation.
“Be careful, falling for a guy like Kade. He isn’t looking for anything besides—”
“What, Carter? What am I looking for? Enlighten me,” Trent growls from behind me.
I will never understand how he has the ability to always appear during times like these. Carter doesn’t cower. But he doesn’t stand up to Trent either. Trent comes behind me, standing tall, breathing erratically.
“Oh, come on, man. I was just joking around,” Carter tries to say
with a laugh.
Trent puts his hands on my hips. “It didn’t sound like a joke to me, man.” He drags out the word man, antagonizing Carter.
Carter tilts his head to the side and gives Trent a smile that sends a shiver down my spine. I know what’s coming next. “Well, I just needed to clear things up with Cam here. We shared a pretty memorable night, if you know what I mean. And I guess I wanted to see where her head was at.” He’s egging Trent on. He knows how jealous Trent gets, and he wants to get under his skin.
Trent’s jaw tenses, and I can see his veins bulging.
He narrows his eyes. “She doesn’t want you, Carter. How many times can you be rejected? She’s mine, so fuck. Off.”
I interrupt the testosterone show. “I’m nobody’s property. This is so stupid. Both of you should be ashamed of yourselves.” I push past Trent and head toward my dorm.
I understand why Trent would be upset with Carter. But he can’t just act like a caveman.
It’s not long before I hear him jogging to catch me, calling out my name. Well, my nickname.
“Sunshine. What the fuck was that about?” He catches up to me and walks alongside me.
“You acting like a caveman again. That’s what it looked like to me,” I toss back at him.
He fires right back, “Fuck that. He said a ‘memorable night.’ Did you fuck him?”
My jaw hits the ground at his profanity. “Wow, Trent, really? Could you be any cruder? No, I did not fuck him.”
He stops walking, tugging on my arm so I’ll stop too. “Then, what did he mean?”
Here it goes. I have to be honest with him. “Well, we kissed.”
His eyes narrow to slits, and he releases my hand. “You kissed? When?” he bites back.
“The night that he gave me a ride home. I thought you were going home with Layla. I was confused, and he was there and being nice.”
He lets out a bitter laugh. “And did you think to … oh, I don’t know, Cameran … ask me if I was going home with her?”
I shake my head and look at the ground. “No. I probably should have.”
“Yeah. You should have. Because, unlike you, I didn’t even look at anyone else during that time. All the while, you were off, making out with that clown?” He throws his hand up, signaling to where Carter just was.
“I know. I’m sorry.”
He starts to turn.
“Trent. Please.”
He looks at me coldly. “I have practice. I have to go. I can’t do this with you right now. I have a big game tomorrow.”
I nod. Tears welling in my eyes. “Okay. I understand.”
And just like that, he turns, and he’s gone.
thirty-seven
Trent
I’m being a dick in practice. But at least it’s fucking working. The team is doing exactly what they should be doing.
Practice ends too soon. I could use the distraction longer.
Coach rounds us all up and tells us what time to be at the field tomorrow. As if we don’t already know. We play Connecticut. Honestly, we should have it in the bag. They’ve lost three games, and we’re still undefeated. But anything can happen, so we need to be prepared.
We all start filing off the field when Coach yells out my name, “Kade.”
I stop walking and turn toward him, wiping the sweat from my forehead with the front of my shirt. “Yeah, Coach?”
He looks up from his clipboard. “Everything all right with you lately? You seem to be a bit, dare I say, moody?”
“Everything’s fine. I’ll be ready for tomorrow. You can count on me, Coach.”
He removes his hat from his head and then pulls it back on. “I know I can count on you, Kade, but damn it, I want to know if you’re all right. All these years I have coached you, you always have the same demeanor. This season, you seem off, not yourself. Maybe more on the edge than usual. And don’t get me wrong, Kade. You aren’t typically sunshine and daisies or anything, but fuck, lately, you’re as moody as my teenage daughters are.”
You know it’s bad when your coach compares you to his fucking teenage daughters. I really need to get my act together.
“Sorry, sir. I’ll be better. I’ve had some personal shit going on, but I won’t let it affect my game. I swear it.”
He nods. “Son, I’ve known you long enough to know your old man is … well, he’s difficult. Even if the rest of the world doesn’t see that side of him.”
“You could certainly say that. He’s a lot to deal with.”
He eyes me a bit longer. “Is there anything else going on with you? Perhaps something to do with the opposite sex?”
Running my hand down the back of my head, I exhale, not comfortable with discussing this with my coach. “I’ll get my head in the game, Coach. No more fuckups.”
He nods. “All right, Kade. Just remember, not everything your dad has ever told you is what’s best for you. He’s not a monster. He just … well, he seemed to lose his way after your mom passed. It’s a damn shame.” With that, he turns and walks off.
I open the locker room door, and everyone else has already cleared out, leaving the place empty. I jump in the shower and turn the spray up as hot as it will go. Welcoming the heat on my sore muscles. I’m so fucking aggravated with everything. In a normal season, I am laser-focused, but this season, I’m all over the fucking place.
My mind circles back to the Carter and Cameran fiasco. I get it. In the grand scheme of things, a kiss isn’t a big deal. I mean, I got my dick sucked, for fuck’s sake. But the thought of those perfect lips on someone else is enough to make me want to put Carter on a fucking gurney. She belongs to me. Even if she doesn’t want to admit it. One thing is for sure. Carter keeps popping up everywhere, and he needs to be taught to stop fucking with what’s mine.
I hear the locker room door open and shut. One of the guys probably forgot something. I’m just rinsing the soap out of my hair when I feel a pair of hands wrap around my waist. Glancing down, I see long red nails. Those are definitely not Cam’s.
I spin around as fast as I can. “What the f—”
Layla’s bare body is an unwelcome sight. She smirks, trying to reach between my legs.
I shove her hand away. “What the fuck are you doing? Get out of here.”
She presses her tits against me. “Oh, come on. Lighten up. We had sex under the bleachers last year. Why not in here too? Don’t you remember how hot it was, wondering if anyone would walk up and see us?”
I push past her and grab my towel. Picking up her clothes, I throw them at her. “Layla, get the fuck out of here. Now.” My voice booms so loud that I’m sure Coach can probably hear me.
Her face goes from seductive to really fucking mad in zero-point-four seconds. “I don’t get it. What the hell does she have that I don’t? I mean, come on, Trent. She isn’t anything special. She doesn’t know what you like the way I do.”
I start throwing my clothes on. I’ll just leave her in here. I’m lacing my sneakers up when she finally slips her dress over her naked body and toes her flip-flops on. I am not about to walk out of this place with her and risk someone seeing us. I swing the door open and head outside. I look behind me to make sure the She-Devil isn’t following, but then I run into something,
“Ow!” Cameran’s petite frame stumbles back.
I reach my arm out and grab her before she falls back on the cement.
I hold her there, two inches from my face. Her breathing hitches, and she looks at my lips. In this moment, with my girl in my arms, I completely forget about the black-haired devil through that door.
“Mason said you had to stay late. So, I figured I’d wait out here.” Her beautiful face looks troubled. Probably because I was a dick to her.
“Yeah, Coach wanted to talk to me. Let’s get out of here.” I pull on her hand to head toward my truck.
“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Miss Vanilla herself.” I hear Layla’s venomous voice, and I know I’m fucked.
C
am glances from me to Layla as she struts out of the locker room, letting the door slam behind her. My hair is wet; her hair is wet. It doesn’t look good.
Cam’s eyes narrow. “What was she doing in there?”
I hold my hands up. “Nothing, I swear. She’s psychotic and snuck in there. I swear nothing happened, Sunshine. Nothing. I pushed her away.”
That evil laugh comes next from behind me. “Is that what we’re calling it now? Nothing? Well, nothing felt pretty good to me, and judging by how hard you came, it felt good to you too.”
I spin around. “You are such a fucking liar, Layla. I haven’t done a thing with you since that night at The Atlantic months ago, and you know it.” I turn back to Cameran, who looks like she might pass out. “Please, believe me, Cameran.”
She looks down and shakes her head. “I-I have to go. Please, don’t follow me.”
She takes off running, and I hear Layla, “When will you learn? If I can’t have you, Kade, neither can she. All those random hook-ups? Well, they meant something. You belong to me. Not to that trash.”
“Fuck you, Layla. The only trash around here is you,” I spew.
Then, I haul ass until I catch Cam, running in front of her to serve as a wall.
“Get the hell away from me!”
“No, I’m not doing that. This is all bullshit, and you know it.”
Tears soak her beautiful face. Her chest rises and falls with every shaky breath she takes. “Trent. Go. Please. Go away.”
“No. I love you. Love fights for what it wants,” I grit out through clenched teeth.
We can never catch a fucking break.
She looks right into my eyes, and words leave her mouth that I will never unhear. “I hate you. I fucking hate you. Don’t ever speak to me again.”
“You don’t mean that. You don’t. Say you don’t fucking mean that.”
She steps around me. “Trent, if you love me, please leave me alone.”
I wipe my eyes on my sleeve. “I can’t do that.”
“You have to. Focus on football. Football is the most important thing.”
