by May Dawson
I laughed as he slung me over his shoulder. I knew better by now, but I was still surprised sometimes by all the power in his leanly muscled frame.
He fell onto the bed with me, the two of us landing side-by-side on the mattress which squealed beneath us. Penn was sweet with me, but not careful, and I liked that. He knew I wasn’t fragile.
Penn rose to his knees, grabbing my hips and yanking them back against his.
I grinned as his cock pressed between my thighs. “Like that, huh?”
“Mm-hmm.” He ran his fingers through my wet hair, drawing my head back. He leaned over my back, his hard, lean body pressed against my spine, to kiss the side of my throat in the way that always drove me crazy. “Like that.”
His fingers tugging my hair sent electric sparks flying through my body. The best part, though, was having Penn against me so tightly, his lips devouring me as he kissed my neck and my shoulders. His lips were soft, the perfect foil to his rough, demanding hand in my hair.
He slipped inside me, filling me, and even though he was big, I slammed my ass back against his hips, wanting more of him. I could feel the laughter shaking his chest at how greedy I was, but after the day I’d had, I just wanted to burn off the stress. It didn’t matter how rough we were; I was safe with him.
He grabbed my hips in his hands, his fingers sinking deep around my hip bones, like they were made for him to hold, and rocked into me over and over.
The two of us moved together, our breath coming in hot, synchronized pants. He slammed home over and over, not gentle, pulling my hair now as he forgot himself, lost in my body.
I loved that I moved him that way, that he breathed hard now, trying to hold himself back. He moaned, beneath his breath, then moaned again, and this time I heard my name on his lips.
“Penn,” I whispered, and I tightened around him as I felt him explode inside me, the two of us coming together, his hard arm tightening around my waist, holding me to him as he emptied inside me. I bit my lip as the room shattered around me.
Then the world put itself back together, a little bit better than it had been before.
He collapsed, dragging me with him. His cock was still buried deep inside me as the two of us cuddled, and he pressed a kiss to the back of my neck, a tender one. The urgency was gone now. But it still felt so good, the way he wanted me, whether we were having sex, or he just held me.
Penn always seemed as if he had things together, on the surface. He was cool and calm.
But he held me like he needed me.
Chapter Seven
Lex
When I walked into our room, Rafe tossed a cell phone through the air to me.
I caught it against my chest. “What?”
“I told Dani I’d help her set up a simulation to show the Dean before we break,” he said. “I hate to ask, but can you give Northsea her phone and all appropriate warnings about not doing anything fucking stupid while we’re off campus? Tell her she can leave if things go wrong with Piper or the babies, but that we’re going to have a long conversation about it when I get back so…be wise.”
We both knew why he hated to ask me, but I said, “Yeah. I’ve got it.”
“Thanks.” He slipped his jacket on.
“Hey,” I said when he was almost to the door. “Do you and Dani have a thing?”
He’d wanted to go with her to the academy—and it made sense he wanted to visit Will, but I had to wonder. The two of them had worked together a lot lately.
Rafe’s lips twisted in a smile for a fraction of a second before he was back to his usual blank stoic face. “Nope.”
Then he was gone, shutting the door behind him a little harder than necessary. Rafe was one of my best friends, but he was so damn weird sometimes.
I headed down the hall to Maddie’s room and knocked. “Northsea. It’s Lex.”
I could almost convince myself we had a real, appropriate cadre-cadet relationship sometimes. It sounded like it.
“One second.” There was a strained edge in her voice, and a lot of rustling sounds from inside. Even some whispering. She must have tripped over something, because there was a metallic clang, and then a low voice mumbling fuck…
A low, masculine voice.
Irritation—okay, jealousy—made my muscles tighten before she threw open the door. She wore her crumpled plaid skirt and her white shirt, buttoned up wrong. Her disheveled, wet blonde hair dripped across her shoulders and soaked her shirt transparent.
“Good evening, sir,” she said automatically, even though her eyes were wide.
Just pretend there’s nothing wrong. “Can I have a minute?”
She stepped back. The door to the bathroom was shut, but whoever had been in here went that way. The citrus tang of her sex was in the air.
The faint, teasing scent made memories flood through my brain: her head tilted back, the sunshine lighting her blonde hair and falling across her small, pale breasts, the smoked honey taste of her on my tongue. I missed the days when I was the one to satisfy her.
“I came to give you this.” I held the phone out to her. “Rafe thought it might be hard for your family to get in touch with anyone in an emergency, since most of the staff will be off campus this weekend.”
Joy lit her face, making me glad that I’d asked Rafe for the favor, even if I had to deal with all his judgment. She reached for the phone, but I held it tighter.
“Listen. If things go awry with Piper or the babies—truly awry, use the common sense I know you have buried deep inside—you can leave campus. Okay? I’ll leave my car keys with you.”
“Thanks, Lex.” She frowned as she took the phone from me.
“What’s wrong?”
Her lips parted, then she smiled, as if she’d changed her mind about what to say. “This was really nice, thank you.”
“Thank Rafe,” I said automatically, then added, “Actually, don’t. Give him a wide berth so you don’t accidentally piss him off in the two hours until everyone leaves campus.”
“Probably a good point,” she said. “Thank Rafe, huh?”
Those crystal-blue eyes of hers were knowing.
I raised my hands innocently, heading for the door. Someone should tell her to be careful if she intended to collect male admirers here at the academy, but it probably shouldn’t come from me.
But I couldn’t resist. I turned around at the door.
“Hey,” I said. “I don’t want this to come out the wrong way.”
Her lips pursed to one side. “That phrase strikes deeper fear than Rafe saying he’s got an extra-fun plan for PT.”
Fair enough.
“I just want you to be careful,” I told her. “You have enemies here. Enemies you don’t deserve and that I can’t protect you from.”
The flicker of disbelief on her face struck right to my soul. She didn’t think I tried to protect her from anything.
I’d thought about losing myself in someone else after our break-up, but I couldn’t make myself feel the slightest stir of desire, even when we went out to the bar and girls crowded around me. One of them had caught me in the back of the bar by the jukebox and tried to kiss me. I’d grabbed her shoulders and pushed her gently away, faster than thought.
That played really well with the guys, but what-the-fuck-ever. I didn’t have to impress them.
Maddie was sunshine, and no other girl in the world shone with her life-giving energy.
Even though she was the only one for me, I wouldn’t ask to be Maddie’s only. But it killed me that I wasn’t part of her life now, not really.
“Don’t tell me who it was,” I said, because the jealousy that throbbed in my chest was a dangerous thing. “But tell me he’s taking care of you. That he’s a good guy.”
“I think so.”
“Good.”
“But you don’t have any right to ask me that,” she added, with sudden heat in her voice.
“I know.”
She must have expected an argument, because h
er lips parted in surprise.
“I don’t have any claim on you,” I admitted. “But when I imagine the future, my future, I see you in it.”
She tilted her head to one side, studying me. She didn’t seem surprised, but she did look sad. “I don’t know how we get from here to there, Lex.”
I didn’t know either. I jerked my head in a nod, then headed out of the room so neither of us had to figure out what to say next.
Chapter Eight
Maddie
Maybe I should take away Jensen’s crown as the king of fucking-with-my-head and give it to Lex instead.
I couldn’t stop thinking about what he said as I headed across academy grounds to the cafeteria with Tyson and Silas.
My still-damp hair was neatly pulled back once again, and I no longer looked like I’d just rolled out of the sex bed, the way I realized now I looked when Lex walked into my room. God. The embarrassment of just the past twenty-four hours, from discussing my Rafe-crush with Jensen to being caught having sex by Lex, would be enough for a lifetime. I’d never need to trip in a skirt or accidentally curse in front of a priest again; I was done. Full-up. For life.
If only it worked that way.
When I imagine the future, I see you in it.
Seriously, how dare he?
“What’re you thinking about, M?” Tyson bumped my shoulder playfully. Even though it was just a shoulder bump, for some reason, restless joyful energy swept through me as he flashed me one of his charming Tyson grins.
Penn had fled the scene after Lex knocked on my door—the memory of Penn’s wide eyes made me want to giggle now that I was no longer hunting for clothes in a panic—but Tyson and Silas had knocked on my door once I’d had a few minutes to recover.
“Just brooding.” I smiled back at him.
I wasn’t sure how much Tyson and Silas knew about my new relationship with Penn, and it felt weird. Silas, Penn, and Ty had all been so kind and friendly. But for some reason, Penn and I had fallen into each other.
Easygoing, handsome Silas, walking by my side with his hands in his pocket and his blond hair falling across his forehead, was both sweet to me and distant in a way. He was harder to get to know. And it drove me crazy, because I wanted to unravel his secrets.
I had the funniest feeling that his pack, like mine, was more comfortable with magic than wolves were supposed to be. I was pretty sure he’d healed me once before, and he seemed annoyed—like I felt—when the other wolves talked about witches like all magic was dark and dreadful.
“You’ve got all weekend to brood,” Tyson pointed out.
I groaned. “Don’t remind me. Are you looking forward to going home?”
Tyson shrugged. “I’m looking forward to pizza, sleep, and no one yelling at me.”
“I wish I could see you and Penn in your natural environment,” I teased. He and Penn came from the same pack.
“I wish I could see Silas in his natural environment,” he said.
Silas said, “Well, someday you’ll all have to come home with me. Not today, though. It’s quite the trip.”
“All?” I asked.
Silas nodded ahead of us. “What’s going on there?”
Rafe and Dani stood in a knot with the dean and some of the patrol guard, the adult shifters who roamed the academy.
“Probably just coming up with some new terrible simulation,” I said.
Just thinking about the fake monsters we’d faced before made my heart speed. It was probably easier for everyone else to remember it was all just pretend, it was practice.
I’d been up-close-and-personal with those monsters when I was just a kid. And as much as I looked forward to killing those monsters for real, the training sims reminded me that I had issues.
As far as I could tell, wolves don’t do therapy. They do tearing-things-apart and misplaced rage and being miserable forever.
“You’ll be here this weekend, right?” Ty asked Silas. His voice was casual, but I didn’t think the question was casual at all, and I raised my eyebrows at him.
“I’m going to visit friends,” Silas said. Then, because he was Silas, he added, “Maddie will be safe if she stays on campus. The academy is warded, and the guard will still be here.”
“Am I the only one who remembers the Great Demon Bear Incident of 2019?” Tyson asked.
“Ty,” I hissed, glancing around. “I don’t want anyone to know about that.”
Just like humans, shifters seemed to readily dismiss the supernatural when it was inconvenient. Everyone seemed to have basically forgotten the bear. I couldn’t make sense of why that was, but I wasn’t going to fight it, either.
“Why?” he demanded. “If you’re in danger, you aren’t on your own here, Maddie. We’re all here to help you.”
“All?” I asked again for a second time.
Tyson swung around, his face serious even though my tone had been teasing. “You know. Me. Silas. Penn. Rafe. Lex. Chase. Probably even Jensen…we’re all here for you. You don’t have to deal with…whatever is going on…alone.”
His words meant something to me, and I swallowed a sudden rise of emotion. I couldn’t tell from the way Ty looked at me if he just wanted to be my friend, or if he wanted something more. But either way, I knew he had my back.
No matter how I felt, I said, “I know. But I am fine. Silas is right. You guys enjoy your weekend. I’ll be right here, safe and sound, when you get back. And we’ll talk then.”
Penn’s father was dying, but if Penn knew I needed him, he’d stay here. I didn’t want to steal his chance to say goodbye.
“I don’t like it,” Tyson growled.
“Since when did you become so protective?” I teased.
“Since that bear thing came after you and I—” He cut himself off. “Since that day in the woods, it’s felt like we’re actually becoming a team.”
“Nothing like saving the life of an ungrateful asshole for team-building,” Silas said, his voice so deadpan that it took a second before Tyson and I started to laugh.
Silas glanced at us like he had meant it before he gave in and smiled.
The three of us went through the cafeteria line together. Tyson had his usual wry observations to make about the questionable cuisine at the academy. I personally was just grateful that this time when meatballs were served, it was unlikely anyone would pelt me with them.
Another third-year student stopped Tyson to ask him a question about the homework.
Silas and I continued to our table, where we were the first ones to plunk down our trays. Beckett was sitting a few tables down, with a different group. I’d seen him at PT this morning, but I hadn’t seen him much lately.
Silas glanced around and then leaned over the table. “Where’s Penn?”
“I don’t know.” It was strange he wasn’t here yet, but why was Silas asking me? Like he knew I had special knowledge of Penn? Carnal knowledge?
“You’re blushing,” he observed in his usual frank way. “And all I did was mention Penn. That’s an interesting response.”
“Silas, don’t make it weird,” I said.
He cocked his head to one side, a faint smile on his lips. I’d worried he’d have hurt feelings about Penn and me, but he didn’t seem to have any feelings at all except amusement.
“I’m glad,” he said. “He desperately needs you.”
Awkward. So awkward. I buried my head in my hands. “What part of don’t make it weird… do we have to talk about this here?”
“Is there anywhere you’re going to talk about it voluntarily?”
“What did I miss?” Tyson stood with his tray braced on one muscular forearm as he slipped one leg over the bench, pausing to take a long sip from his milk.
“Maddie and I were discussing her sexual relationship with Penn, but I don’t think she really wants to talk about it so maybe we should go back to critiquing the spaghetti.” Silas picked up one of the logs of spaghetti that had clumped together, and it dangled from his finge
rs like a worm.
Tyson choked and sat down on the bench. I thumped his back, shooting a warning look at Silas as people turned to listen to us. Despite Rafe’s warning when I first arrived at the academy, I was pretty sure Penn and I were allowed to do what we were doing, but I still didn’t want to broadcast our burgeoning relationship to the universe.
Tyson ran the back of his hand over his mouth, his chest heaving with one last suppressed cough. “Maddie and Penn what now?”
“You didn’t know?” Silas cocked his head to one side. “I thought we’d all noticed and we were pretending not to.”
“That would be a great strategy.” I leveled my fork at Silas. “We don’t need to discuss this.”
But secretly, I felt happier having it all out in the open. Silas, in his usual weird way, was doing me a favor. I didn’t want anyone else to know beyond our circle, but I didn’t want secrets from my guys.
My guys? When did I start thinking of my team as my guys?
The Dean stepped up onto the stage in the cafeteria, which I’d never seen used before. Dean McCauley looked trim and energetic in his well-tailored suit, his salt-and-pepper hair brushed back from his high forehead. He seemed like the perfect stereotypical college dean, but I could never forget the callous way he’d told Jensen one of his best friends was dead.
I didn’t trust the man any farther than I could throw him.
“It’s been a busy month,” the Dean said as the room fell silent.
It felt almost as if he was answering my question. It had been a strange, wild month, and somehow over the course of it, I’d grown really attached to my strange roommates, to Tyson, and even to the two cadre who made my life so miserable.
The Dean went on. He congratulated us on the work we’d done so far, before reminding us that inter-team fights and our first trials—far more intense simulations of the monsters we would encounter on the streets when we fought to protect our packs—were just ahead of us, after a weekend of rest. He said we’d even be thrown together randomly with other shifters instead of fighting with our teams on occasion, and his words left tension twisting through my stomach. I didn’t like the idea of fighting side-by-side with anyone else. I trusted them.
