by Kelli Kimble
I shook my head. Don’t want to be the leader. Just want to be apart from the pack.
“We’re not wolves,” he said, snorting. “But, if that’s what you need to do, then do it. There’s no shame in doing something great. We should all be so bold.”
Bold? I asked.
“Yeah. In some ways, I think being in the tank makes us kind of passive. It’s great that you don’t want to just let life happen to you. Grab it by the balls, if you can.” He winked at me, then took away the tablet, before he turned the treadmill back on—at a notch higher than the highest speed I’d tried.
By the end of the workout, I was sweating profusely. Thankfully, I was now strong enough to take a shower and go to the bathroom on the toilet—though I still had to urinate sitting down, until I could go without my knees starting to shake from my stationary weight. Somehow, walking was a little easier than standing still.
Later, when Fiona dropped by to say goodnight, she confronted me. “Leif tells me that you are feeling glum,” she said.
I nodded. Want to stand out. Be great, I scrawled on the tablet.
“Hm, yes. I can see that in you. You’ve always been a little different from your siblings. I couldn’t put my finger on it. But, now that you put it that way, I see what it is. You have ambition—something most of your siblings don’t seem to have. Some of them are competitive, yes. Definitely, there is sibling rivalry around the colony. But, nobody else seems to have true ambition.”
I thought for a moment, then scrawled out, Not sure how to be great.
She laughed. “I suppose that’s up to you. There are an infinite number of things that could put you in the arena of greatness. Just look at the history of humans in your tablet. There are thousands upon thousands of examples of great men and women in those files.”
I nodded. She was right. I could define greatness for myself. But, some historical reading would be good inspiration.
“So, you’re feeling better, then? Hopeful?” she prompted. She grabbed hold of my hand, and my heart swelled in my throat for a moment. This woman had cared for me in every way possible, and still cared for me—despite there being more than a dozen carbon copies of me running around.
I wrote on my tablet, Yes, thanks. Better.
“Good,” she said, gripping my hand to her chest for a moment. “Good. I couldn’t stand to think that I’d brought you out of the tank, and you weren’t happy here.”
I smiled and stood up to hug her.
“Oh,” she said, laughing a little helplessly. “I’d forgotten that you can get up and hug me now.” She kissed me once on the cheek. “Goodnight, Silver. Remember that I already think you’re pretty great.”
She closed my curtains as she retreated, though I could have closed them myself. Then, she went on to the other beds. But, I wasn’t paying attention at all, because I was cracking open the history files on my tablet.
Chapter 3
I spent all my free time for the next two months doing nothing but reading history. Leif accused me countless times of being boring, though he gamely allowed me to impart any newly-discovered knowledge to him. It wasn’t until I came to pre-winter history that I really became entrenched.
Before the winter, the world had been so much more interesting, with so many more people in so many more places. At night, I dreamed of being alive before the winter, and during the day, I got myself through tough activities by imagining it. I spouted off facts, names, events, and more at every opportunity.
Most of my siblings were bored by my obsession and couldn’t understand what was so interesting about people who were long dead. But Leif, especially—and sometimes, Tennie—at least found it somewhat interesting.
One day, the three of us were cleaning a newly-emptied tank together, when I mentioned how fascinating it was to me that ancient Egyptians had built pyramids that lasted for thousands of years past the decline of their civilization. We were discussing the purpose of the pyramids when Maestro came in.
“Got the ear of a captive audience, eh, Silver?” he said.
I gave him a half-smile. Maestro generally didn’t think about anything that wasn’t exercise, and he found my interest in history especially grating.
“This is interesting stuff, if you’d just give it a chance,” said Leif.
“What? History before the winter? Ha. We all know that stuff is just made up.”
I laughed. “Why in the world would anyone go to such lengths to make all this up? The knowledge we have stored from pre-winter takes up almost five Exabytes. We haven’t even created one Exabyte of data since the winter. How could someone just make up five times that amount?”
Maestro sneered. “Don’t be stupid, Silver. You really believe all that crap? There’s no way half of that so-called ‘history’ is true.”
Tennie, who was inside the empty tank, scrubbing the walls, poked her head out the top. “Maestro, go back to the gym. We’re not interested in your conspiracy theories.”
“It isn’t a theory. It’s fact.”
“A fact that you can’t substantiate,” said Leif.
He curled his upper lip even further. “You three were made for each other. No wonder everyone else is avoiding you.” He turned and stomped out of the room.
His statement was like a punch to the gut. Were Leif and Tennie being isolated because they listened to me?
Tennie sunk back inside the tank. “Don’t listen to him, Silver. He’s jealous, is all.”
“Jealous of what?” I mumbled. Though I’d learned a lot from the history files, I hadn’t come upon the nugget that would inspire me to greatness. Actually, if nothing else, much of the history was kind of depressing. As a race, human beings weren’t exactly brimming with kindness.
“Hey, you know,” said Leif, “he has something there. You could prove him wrong, Silver. You could prove that pre-winter humanity existed. That the history files are real. That would be pretty great.”
“Oh, yeah,” said Tennie. “I love that idea.”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I’ll have to think about it.”
“If nothing else, it would be a good first step towards greatness,” said Leif, “and I think you could do it.”
“Thanks,” I said. But, it didn’t feel great. It felt like Maestro was probably right; I’d been wasting my time, while making my two favorite siblings outcasts.
I sighed and went back to cleaning out the gunked-up tank filter. I threw myself into it and didn’t say another word about history that day.
◆◆◆
Over the next few days, my sadness about Maestro’s accusations turned to anger. Where did he get off, judging my passion, and how dare any of my siblings take out their discomfort on Tennie and Leif?
The next time I saw Leif, I tried to bring it up as casually as possible. “So, the other day. When Maestro said that pre-winter history is made up. You remember that?”
Leif rolled his eyes. “Of course, I remember it. Who could forget him acting like such an idiot?”
“Is he right? Are the others avoiding you?”
“What? Of course not. Only him, and who cares if he stops talking to us? There are only so many times you can discuss the correct form for a squat.”
“Are you sure?” I grabbed him by the arm and spun him to face me. “You aren’t feeling cast-out by the others at all?”
“Nah, and anyway, what difference would it make if I was? I’ve got you and Tennie. That’s all I need.” He cuffed me on the shoulder. “Thanks for checking in, though. It means a lot.” He grinned. “So, this sounds to me like you’re considering something great. What is it?”
“How’d you know?”
“You’re practically vibrating with excitement. A better question would be: How could I miss it?”
I took a deep breath, then said—in a single breath, so that I didn’t have time to stop and consider what I was saying—“I’m thinking that I like your idea. I am going to prove that pre-winter history isn’t made-up.�
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“Bravo,” he said. “Anything I can do to help? When do we start?”
It was my turn to smile. “We start as soon as possible. I have some ideas about where to start, and I want to run them by you and Tennie, and maybe Fiona, too. Do you have time after dinner?”
“Of course. Just tell me where and when.”
◆◆◆
Tennie and Leif were waiting for me in one of the empty tank rooms after dinner. When I came in, Tennie clapped. “You’re going to do it! I’m so proud of you.”
“Wait until you’ve heard my plan before you give out the kudos,” I said.
Leif rolled his eyes. “Come on; we know you’re onto something. Let’s hear it.”
We settled in a circle on the floor, and I got out my tablet. “You remember the other day, when Maestro said I was being stupid for believing the history files, right?” I asked Tennie.
“Yes, it would be hard to forget him acting like such a jerk.”
“Right. So, Leif suggested that I prove that he’s wrong—that the pre-winter history is true. So, that’s what I’m going to do.”
“How?” asked Leif.
“The colony was built just a few years before the winter. The history files say that most of the laborers were from a nearby town. It had a population of over a thousand people. Look; here’s a photo.” I held up the tablet and showed them a somewhat-blurry photo of a town square. There was a red-brick building in the background, with white-framed windows and stone columns. In front of the building was a large area of grass with a fountain in the middle and sidewalks crisscrossing through it. A person was riding a bike into the frame, and birds were flocked around an old woman near the fountain. I pointed to the brick building. “This was the town hall, and it should have all kinds of data in it.”
“If it’s still standing,” said Tennie.
“Exactly.”
“What are the chances of that?” asked Leif.
“Before the winter, the Egyptian pyramids were known to be about 5,000 years old. The winter began less than 2,000 years ago. So, something like the pyramids—something made of stone—could still be standing.”
“It seems like you’ve thought this through,” he said.
“I have. I’m going to go to the site of the town and find the remains of the town hall. Hopefully, I’ll be able to find some artifact that is clearly not from the colony, and I’ll bring it back and show it to everyone.”
“And that will show that the pre-winter history is true, because it proves they existed,” said Tennie.
“Right. Exactly. And look at this: Our tablets have a sort of mapping function. Do you remember this from the programming?” I asked. I demonstrated how the tablet could show a map of the area, marking our position with a dot, and the position of the coordinates of the town hall. “All I have to do is get the dot that represents me to arrive at the town hall dot.”
“Seems easy enough,” said Leif. “I’m impressed, Silver. What can I do to help?”
“Yeah, I want to help, too,” said Tennie. “What can we do?”
I frowned. “I appreciate you offering,” I said. “Really, I do. But, I kind of wanted to do this by myself.”
Tennie and Leif exchanged a glance. “You’re going outside by yourself?” asked Tennie.
“Sure, why not? It isn’t far. The map says it’s about a three-mile walk. On the treadmill, I can do a three-mile walk in a little over half an hour.”
“I doubt walking on exterior terrain is as straightforward as walking on the treadmill,” she said.
“I thought you wanted me to do this,” I said. I didn’t like the whiny note that crept into my voice.
“I do,” she said. She gestured to Leif. “We do. But, you have to be realistic. You’ve never been outside. You’ve no idea what the conditions are like. Fiona doesn’t even know; it’s been three years since she set foot outside.”
I looked at Leif.
“She has a point, man,” he said. “I agree that you have to do something great. But, I’m not sure I agree that going off by yourself outside would a good idea.”
“What if I was only gone for one day? I’d leave in the morning after breakfast and be home by dinner. I’ll go straight to the town and back, and if I feel like I’m running out of time, I’ll cut short and come home. You think I could do that?”
“You’re talking like it’s a secret,” said Leif.
“It is. I want it to be a surprise. I’m going to bring something back and shove it in Maestro’s face, and there’s going to be no denying that he was wrong. I need him to be caught off-guard.”
“So, you want us to stay here and keep it a secret that you’ve snuck off to some abandoned town?” said Tennie.
“Yes, and if you could, maybe cover for me, too. You know, just pretend that whoever asks about me has just missed me, and I’ll be right back?”
Tennie sighed. “This is really important to you?”
“Yes, it is. Extremely.”
“And you’ll be gone for less than eight hours?” said Leif.
“Even less, if possible,” I said.
“I suppose we can’t argue with that,” Tennie said. “I’ll help you. But, you have to be back by dinner. If not, I’m going to tell Fiona and insist that we go looking for you.”
“Fair enough,” I said, “and you’ll cover for me? If anyone asks?”
“We’ll do what we can,” said Leif.
“Thanks, guys,” I said.
“This is so exciting!” said Tennie. “I can’t wait to see what you find.”
It took a few days to figure out how to get outside. Much of the colony was unused, and someone had cut off access to some of the floors. But, we persisted in exploring every room and hallway.
It was Leif who found it. The door was like any other, and it wasn’t locked, which was a little surprising. I’d thought it would be special in some way, but it wasn’t.
The door opened into a short hallway that curved just enough to mask what was beyond the mountain wall. But, the difference in the light was unmistakable. It was sunlight, and it was beautiful.
Leif and I crept down the hall, then out towards the light. There were dried leaves and debris swirling around our feet, stirred by the breeze of the air pressure from inside the colony. The light got brighter and almost unbearable. But, when we got far enough to see around the bend, we both stopped short.
The outside was a riot of color, light, and sound. I was immediately drawn to it. Why were we living in the colony, when this was out here? The air smelled and even felt crisp and clean.
“Wow,” said Leif.
“What do you see?” called Tennie.
“Just come and look,” I said.
She looked around for something to prop open the door with. It was probably a good thing that she thought of that, because there was no handle on the outside. She joined us, and when she saw it, she gasped. “It’s amazing,” she said.
“Can you believe we live inside? Why wouldn’t we be out here?” I asked.
“That’s easy,” Tennie said. “There are still people in the tanks. Fiona won’t leave them in there by themselves.”
Right. The other siblings. There were so many of them, I’d lost count.
“Should we go look around?” I asked.
Tennie and Leif shared a glance around me. I didn’t like it when they communicated with their secret looks—especially since they didn’t even try to hide it. “Maybe we should go back in,” said Tennie. “I don’t know if Fiona would like it if we went outside.”
I shrugged. “I’ll be out there on my own tomorrow, anyway. Suit yourselves.”
“Tomorrow?” said Tennie. “Just like that, you’re going?”
I laughed. “I’m not getting any younger, and I’ve already got everything prepared. I want to get this done.”
“Good for you,” said Leif, clapping a hand on my shoulder. “Let’s get back inside, before someone misses us.”
The next morning couldn’t come quickly enough. I stuffed some supplies into my pillowcase: A rope, water, my tablet, a whistle, a hat I’d found in one of the rooms we stumbled upon while looking for the exit, and a pouch of nutrient liquid. Then, I headed off to the exit. Leif and Tennie knew I was leaving first thing, and they already had a plan to mask my absence.
I propped open the exterior door and made my way into the sunlight. It was even more beautiful, once I’d completely emerged from the hallway. I stuck the hat on my head to shade my eyes, and I stood there for a good 15 or 20 minutes, just feeling what it was like to be outside.
Eventually, I got out my tablet and looked at the map. I began walking towards the dot that marked the location of the town hall. It was a short but steep downhill walk through stubby trees, before the ground flattened out some. I hadn’t gotten far though when I came to a fence. From Fiona’s stories, I knew the fence had a gate in it, so I turned to the right and walked along the fence, looking for it. Finding only the dead end leading to the mountain wall, I turned back in the other direction and found my way out.
I lined myself up with the tablet again and began walking. Leif had been right; walking on uneven terrain wasn’t as easy as walking on a treadmill. I was quickly out of breath. I checked the map and found I still had two-and-a-half miles to go. I was already tired, and I wasn’t even halfway there.
But, I still had plenty of time, so I pressed on. I checked the time when I’d finished the first mile. I’d been walking for at least 20 minutes. I sat down on a rock and took a sip of water. I leaned back and sat quietly, something I’d often done in the tank, whenever I felt overwhelmed. I was rewarded with a glimpse of a pair of squirrels, chattering over a nut. I watched in fascination as they appeared to argue. The larger squirrel won and ate the nut in triumph from a low branch. The other squirrel ran back and forth on the ground, chattering away.
When I moved to stand up from the rock, I startled them both, and they retreated up a tree, where I couldn’t see them. I checked the time again. I’d now been gone for 30 minutes.
