At least, he didn’t think he wanted it. Watching River explore every inch of the abandoned hotel tempted him to rethink his plan. The sway of her braid down the middle of her back or the wide-eyed excitement when she ran back to him lured him closer and closer. He found himself reaching for the tip of her braid or her hand.
Every time he thought he could touch her, she would run out of his reach again. His dragon’s tail lashed. It saw this as a hunt with River as the prize at the end of it. Jensen gave the beast a warning. That wasn’t how this was going to go down.
He would not take a Montoya as a mate. He had to think about his mother.
The beast thumped its tail in indignation. The thump reverberated up his spine, as if it had been a real impact. He scowled and struggled to contain the beast’s desires before they spilled out of him.
“Hey,” River said. She touched his chest ever so lightly with her fingertips and looked up at him with innocent green-gray eyes. “Are you all right?”
His breath stuck in his throat. He wasn’t all right, but that wasn’t something a male shifter could say. He had to be stalwart. If he wavered even the slightest, then those he held up would crumble.
“Fine. I’m fine.”
She pressed her hand to his chest. His heart hammered beneath her touch. She had to have felt it. He waited for her to lean in and kiss him. He wanted it. He watched her lips, soft and pink and perfect. But it never happened.
River pulled her hand away, which he sorely missed the moment it was gone.
No, he told himself. This isn’t going to become anything more than a friendship.
“Do you believe in ghosts?” she asked. “I’ve read about all the local ghost stories. A lot of them seem like tourism bait. You know, when a business wants to attract people looking for a thrill.”
Jensen stepped back out into the hall. River followed, staying close to him.
“My family says this is where Eliana died,” he said. “When her relatives dragged her away from Logan, they brought her here. They filled the hotel with possible suitors to take her mind off Logan. Eliana didn’t want anything to do with them. She locked herself in her room and wouldn’t let anyone visit.”
He climbed the stairs and made his way toward the balcony that looked out over the back of the hotel grounds. After he tested its stability, he circled back around and offered a hand to River. She looked at it for a long while before taking it.
“That story makes me think the feud has been around a lot longer than Logan and Elliana.” He ran his thumb over the back of River’s hand before stopping himself.
Though a view of the town and farms sprawled below, River’s attention remained fixed on him.
“I don’t know of any point in history when our families worked together,” he said, sadly.
The corner of her mouth lifted. “They’re working together right now. Cash and Ember. Baylee and Gale.”
Jensen nodded. He didn’t know why he’d become so somber all of a sudden. They’d come out here to have fun. If he didn’t change the subject, he would ruin her day.
“So, have you read anything about the hotel’s ghost in your books?”
River laughed. He could have recorded that sound and used it as pain relief.
She leaned against the balcony railing. “The hotel was shut down because guests reported shaking ceilings and the smell of smoke in the halls. Others saw glowing eyes in the woods. My favorite is someone’s testimony of a monster they encountered in the dark, how it made the ground tremble when it walked and how the trees cracked under its feet.
“You know what that sounds like to me?”
“Some dragon shifters partied a little too hard and got caught,” Jensen replied.
Again, she laughed. He wanted to see what other sounds she would make if he pressed her against the balcony railing. Would she squeal in fear or welcome him with a soft whimper? Jensen shook himself free of the notion.
5
River couldn’t believe she walked the same halls as Eliana Barnes. The hotel had been weathered by time, but River enjoyed the process of envisioning what used to be. The art deco furniture and gilded mirrors helped her conjure music. She could almost hear the sound of a smuggled champagne bottle being popped.
Those days were over, though. No amount of work could bring them back. The wood had rotted and some of the floors threatened to collapse underfoot. She expected disaster to strike and for Jensen to swoop in and save her, but it never happened.
When they finished their exploration and headed back to the truck to grab the picnic he’d packed, the sky decided to open up. They jumped into the truck just as rain fell from the heavens in one great sheet of water.
River stole a glance at Jensen and realized he was watching her. She faced forward, her cheeks warming again.
“I’m sorry. This isn’t how I planned for the day to go.”
His voice enveloped her in this small space. A hunger that had nothing to do with food gnawed at her insides. She tried to put on a soft smile, but it felt shaky. If he looked too closely, he might be able to see what she was trying to hide underneath.
But Jensen seemed oblivious. He opened the cooler of food he’d packed and passed her a paper plate. She expected cheese and crackers, containers of fruit, and little bottles of wine. Instead, Jensen passed her a slice of cold pizza.
She burst out laughing. He paused.
“I didn’t say I planned a romantic picnic,” he said with a hint of teasing in his voice. “I ordered pizza three days this week. I need help eating it.”
“You couldn’t have switched it up? There are really good delivery options in town.”
Jensen passed her a bottle of hot sauce. She took it, though she didn’t know what to do with it. He mimed shaking it over the pizza. Though she was appalled at first, she did as he instructed. The tangy and spicy sauce brightened the cold day-old pizza.
“My uncle taught me that one,” Jensen said.
She twisted in her seat to face him. “Tell me more about your life.”
Though he shrugged as if there wasn’t much to tell, Jensen gave her what she wanted. He told her about all the trouble Baylee had gotten him into. He blamed it on Ember and called her the ringleader, but River could tell that Jensen had followed of his own free will. The way he embraced life made her hungry for the same kind of excitement.
The drab limbo that she lived in had sucked all the life out of her. Listening to Jensen fueled her. It was like coming up for air for the first time. If only she could do these things. Though, she knew her mother would freak out if she knew that River had spent the day exploring an abandoned building.
What other fun things could they do that would make her mother mad? River wanted to try them all.
“One time, Callum caught me trying to peek into the women’s changing rooms at the pool. I thought I was done for when he plucked me out of the tree I’d climbed—you know, to get the view. Callum didn’t say a damn thing. Not the whole drive home. My mind raced with all the ways he was going to punish me, but he did the one thing I didn’t think of.”
River held her breath, enraptured.
“He took me right to my mother and told her what I’d done. I know dragon shifters heal quickly, but I swear she spanked me so hard I couldn’t sit down for a week.” He laughed and shook his head. When his gaze slid toward her, his eyes danced with a beastly light. “It kind of explains some of the things I like to do now.”
Oh. Oh.
All the wires in River’s brain crossed again. She heard static for ten seconds. Jensen fell quiet, a pensive look overtaking him. He shook his head.
“I’m sorry. My mom always told me I had rocks for brains.”
“That’s nicer than the things my mom says,” River said quietly. “It’s different when your mother tells you that you have eggshells for bones. She’s…overprotective.”
The air in the truck became heavy. They both shrank into their seats.
River regarde
d him. “I don’t think you have rocks for brains. Rocks wouldn’t think to adventure in a crumbling landmark or put hot sauce on pizza.”
He laughed. “If you think putting hot sauce on pizza is revolutionary, then I would hate to see what you eat on a regular basis.”
“A lot of salad. It’s easy to throw into a container. Especially when it comes pre-mixed in a bag.”
He twisted in his seat. “Please tell me you eat more than just salad. If you have weak bones, then that’s what’s wrong with you! We’re getting you a burger after this. I don’t care if you’re vegetarian. I’ll get you a veggie burger. Don’t they make them to taste like beef, nowadays?”
The pizza was more than enough, but she enjoyed his sudden desire to care for her. It made her realize just how invisible she was to most people. Though her mother watched her closely, everyone else steered a wide circle around her and her sister. Even Quincy avoided them.
Jensen saw River. He paid attention to her, but not in a way that felt overbearing. He allowed her to climb all the rickety stairs on her own. He hung back and waited in case she needed him. When she admitted that she didn’t eat much, he offered more food out of concern. She doubted he cared about the size of her waist in the least.
He turned the key in the ignition. Her stomach dropped. She hadn’t paid attention to the time. Their time together had run out while she’d been enjoying herself. She didn’t want it to end, but she wasn’t about to ask him to do something he clearly didn’t want to do. If he was taking her home, then that had to mean he was done for the day.
She tried to keep her disappointment off her face, but she wasn’t sure it worked because Jensen kept stealing glances in her direction. He didn’t say anything, though. She wished he would speak to her or crack a joke to lighten the weight trying to crush her.
At the edge of town, Jensen didn’t take the turn toward Logan’s. He kept going. They coasted into town, much to her confusion. She sat up and took stock of where they were headed. The lot they turned into shouldn’t have surprised her.
“The Beef Shack?” She tilted her head as she looked at Jensen.
He smirked and nodded.
Caution crackled in her chest, hot and electric.
“What are you thinking?” she hissed. “This is a public place!”
If they were caught together, then River would never escape her mother’s sight ever again. Alice would become permanently attached to River’s hip. It was the very last thing River wanted. She would rather fling herself into the sun.
“Are you vegetarian? Vegan?”
Her jaw dropped. “Didn’t you hear me? I can’t go in there.”
He sucked his teeth. His beast’s light flickered in his eyes. “I understand that you can’t be seen with me.”
“That’s not what I said.”
He pressed his knuckles into the steering wheel and refused to look at her. “But that’s what you meant.”
A frustrated growl rumbled up River’s throat. Her beast wanted to crawl out of her and shake sense into this man. Her hesitation had nothing to do with Jensen. She wished she could throw caution to the wind, but River would never be able to escape the grasp her family had on her.
She could do nothing. Everything she’d ever wanted had been taken away from her because it’d been deemed too dangerous. She was a damned dragon. Broken bones healed in a matter of days. Wounds and bruises vanished in hours.
She wasn’t weak.
She wasn’t going to collapse.
But her mother refused to believe that. River and Raven would always be too fragile for this world in her mother’s eyes. The greatest danger for her girls was a Barnes man.
So, in some ways, Jensen had been right. She couldn’t be seen with him. If a Montoya saw her with him, then it would get back around to her mother. River wished she could explain that it wasn’t him or his heritage that bothered her, but her own flesh and blood.
“I wasn’t going to take you inside,” Jensen said to the steering wheel. “I was going to get it to go and take you back to Logan’s. I get it, though. The feud isn’t over.”
Fuck the feud, she wanted to say. The words stuck in her throat. She couldn’t find her voice. Her beast raged, but she quaked. She hadn’t meant to hurt him with her warning, but she’d done so all the same. Guilt weighed on her and kept her from trying again. She could very well fuck it up again.
Jensen got out of the truck and left her alone in the parking lot. River sank into her seat, wary of people passing by on the street. Not for the first time, she wished she could be someone else. If she could cast off her Montoya name and her parentage, she would. She would run free into the world without fear.
But duty kept her chained. As the clan shrunk, she would have to stay and keep the family alive. It would be expected of her to marry and bring her husband into the clan like her mother had. It wasn’t traditional, but there was nothing normal about being Alice Montoya’s daughter.
Jensen wanted to cool off inside, but he couldn’t escape the hurt River’s words had caused.
He’d known.
He’d been properly warned.
But damn, to have her tell him to his face that she couldn’t be seen with him had felt like a knife in his chest. He knew she didn’t mean it cruelly, but it had hurt all the same.
He placed an order for two burgers, making sure that River’s was vegetarian just in case. He wasn’t really sure what her preferences were, and he didn’t want to make assumptions. Going back out to ask her again wasn’t an option while he needed to cool down.
The fear and hurt on her face would break him all over again. Jensen had wanted to do something nice. He’d tried to make her day better while enjoying her company. Perhaps, this wouldn’t work out after all. He thought about dropping her off and leaving her behind, but his beast snarled threateningly at him.
That wasn’t an option, either. It wasn’t polite. That’s the reason he fed himself. It would be rude to just leave her and never talk to her again. They were friends, and that was all. This didn’t have to hurt so bad. He had no right to take it so personally.
The waitress, her smile white and hair golden, flitted back to him with two take-out containers in her hands. She flashed him a broad smile and pushed his receipt toward him with something scribbled on it. He paid no attention to the scribble until he got outside.
She’d taken the time to write her phone number onto the receipt. He glanced back, even though she was out of sight. His attention slid away from the restaurant and fell on the woman in his truck. River nervously played with the end of her braid. Her hands stilled when she saw him. A small smile reached her lips.
Jensen crumpled the phone number in his hand and tossed it in the nearby trash bin. He didn’t need to date anyone right now.
“I’m not ready for the day to be over yet,” he said. “How about I take you to meet someone. Don’t worry. Your mom won’t be able to find us there.”
River seemed apprehensive, but nodded. Jensen handed the two take-out containers to her and hopped into the driver’s seat. The ride was quiet. He knew that if he didn’t say something first, River would keep silent.
But what should he say? His attention slid toward her over and over again. She’d pushed her sleeves up her arms. If he weren’t driving, he would have mapped the constellations her freckles made. Her long fingers tapped a beat he couldn’t place on top of the containers. Soon, her head swayed side to side while she mouthed words he couldn’t hear.
“Are you singing?”
She stilled. “Uh, no. I wasn’t making a sound.”
Something stirred within his beast, but Jensen paid it no attention. He turned down the long gravel drive that led toward the house. His beast warned him that introducing River to his mother meant more than he thought. Jensen waved the beast’s warnings away. He wanted River to have a good day. If she got along with his mother, then she would have a new friend. They would both have someone in their lives. This could beco
me a safe haven for River.
All Jensen wanted to do was make someone happy. He struggled to make his mother happy right now. If he could bring a little joy to River’s life, then maybe he would feel something. He might experience a little bit of satisfaction or pride.
Right now, he felt like there was nothing he could do right. No matter how he tried, he couldn’t be what anyone needed. Callum saw him as a traitor now. Jensen wasn’t sorry that he’d helped Gale, but he missed the relationship he’d had with his uncle. He missed that sense of being in the right place.
Jensen didn’t know where his place was anymore. He’d walked into River’s life and made a place for himself there, but he didn’t know how long this would last. The longer he stuck around, the more it would hurt when she finally shoved him away.
So, maybe bringing her home was a bad idea, but there was no turning back now. He parked the truck and helped River out of her seat. She wore an inquisitive expression. They were away from town, on Barnes territory. Here, she was safe.
His mother greeted them with open arms. Marjorie immediately pulled River into a hug. River seemed stiff and skittish at first, but when she melted into Marjorie’s embrace, Jensen’s heart nearly burst. He had to look away as feelings began to stir inside him.
This wasn’t permanent. It was only for a day. He couldn’t have River, no matter how much he wished he could. They were on opposite sides of this. Every boundary that stood in their way was larger than the last, with Alice Montoya as the final boss.
He didn’t know how to handle Alice. He didn’t like the idea of fighting a woman. If Quincy had been the one in the way, then matters would have been different. But this was River’s mother. The best Jensen could do was offer a reprieve every now and then.
Jensen knew better than to get attached because the danger of getting burned would always follow hot on River’s heels. Even with hat danger present, he couldn’t help but welcome her with open arms over and over again. He already wondered what her lips would taste like. If he tried to kiss her, she’d scurry away for sure. If she didn’t run, then her mother would hunt him down. Jensen needed to keep this platonic, but his beast wasn’t thrilled with the idea.
A Fate Forbidden (Great Plains Dragon Feud Book 3) Page 4
