This wasn’t part of the plan but he still wanted her. He wanted this when they returned to London. He could have kicked himself for thinking that he could put a time constraint on their relationship but it had seemed a very easy conclusion at the time. He was an expert when it came to detaching and he hadn’t foreseen any problem detaching from something that had started life as a charade.
But he hadn’t banked on just how addictive she would become. No sooner was he sated than his body was gearing up again to have her, to feel her tightness, abrasive against his girth, and to hear those erotic cries and whimpers that she could never seem to control whenever he touched her.
What would be the ramifications of prolonging this? For the past couple of hours, he had mulled over that scenario and reasoned that it could work. He would be sleeping with his PA, but it wasn’t a foregone conclusion that it would jeopardise their working relationship. He had managed to quell his misgivings and look to a bigger picture in which he could continue to sleep with her.
‘Tomorrow?’ Abby blanched because she had banked on three more days of him.
Gabriel shifted onto his side, prepared to test the water, to ask her how she felt about carrying on once they were back in London. It would certainly delight his grandmother if she came visiting any time soon, which he suspected she would want to do, given her new lease of life.
‘I have a meeting that can’t be delegated,’ he told her ruefully.
‘Right. I’d thought...’
‘You’d thought...?’
‘Well.’ She laughed but the laughter stuck in her throat. ‘I just thought that we had a bit more time together.’
Gabriel stilled and looked at her narrowly, saying nothing until she shot him a nervous glance from under her lashes.
‘Of course,’ Abby continued lamely, ‘I totally understand about unavoidable meetings. I’ve worked with you long enough to know where your priorities lie.’ Which didn’t exactly come out as she’d intended. It had sounded vaguely accusatory, almost as though his priority should have been her.
‘Where my priorities lie...’ Gabriel murmured.
‘Your grandmother will be really disappointed.’
‘I’ll return in a couple of weeks, and then come and spend weekends here for the foreseeable future. That should appease her.’
‘Yes, yes, it will.’ Did that include her? Abby wondered. She took a deep breath, thought of the safe and careful life she’d led since she’d broken up with Jason. That Internet date had been the most adventurous thing she had done since she had moved to London. She had been so intent on making sure she kept a tight control over her life that she hadn’t even noticed just how fast the life she should have been living was passing her by.
Gabriel had awakened her, made her realise how precious each and every moment was, and how important it was that her needs, on all levels, were fulfilled.
So they hadn’t talked about London, at least not since they had become lovers. But then, when this had started, they hadn’t travelled down roads that had become intimate surprisingly fast, and not just physically intimate, but emotionally intimate.
‘Gabriel,’ she began huskily, curving her body against his and looking up at him with clear eyes. ‘I never thought I could ever feel this way.’ She stopped, flushed and thanked the Lord that she hadn’t added what had been on the tip of her tongue: feel this way about you. She’d stopped in time but she could sense him stilling, reading the unspoken words. ‘I mean,’ she said helplessly. ‘I know what this is about, of course I do, but when I’m here, lying next to you...’ Like someone who’d stepped into quicksand, Abby knew that she was floundering, sinking and saying stuff she knew she shouldn’t, but somehow she couldn’t resist. ‘What I’m trying to say... I... I...’
‘Don’t.’
The single syllable, spoken gently but firmly, was like a boulder dropped into a glassy, flat lake, a boulder that sent ripples cascading in never-ending circles, a cause and effect that brought hot colour flooding her cheeks.
He knew. He’d seen the desperation in her eyes and he was giving her the opportunity to step back from the edge of the cliff.
Abby had never felt so mortified in her life before. She laughed shakily. ‘What I was just going to say...’ She frantically tried to find a lifeline that wouldn’t sound pathetic and contrived. ‘Is that, although I find I have feelings for you that I never guessed I could ever have, I’ve actually...um...missed being at work. It’ll be great to get back to reality.’
‘Feelings for me?’ His voice had cooled. ‘No, let’s not explore that angle. Let’s settle for getting back to the reality waiting for us back in London.’ He shifted off the bed and then lazily headed towards the bathroom. ‘I’m going to get showered.’ He turned to her as he was at the door. ‘Then I might have to head to my office downstairs and start ironing out the details for tomorrow’s meeting. It’s the Jefferson deal. It seems that the family is on board with a takeover but they need to talk it through with me face to face.’
‘Yes, the Jefferson deal, right.’
‘No rush, but I’ll need you to sift through their accounts and forward me the profit margins for the past two years, and which subsidiaries are losing money and how much.’
‘Yes, of course.’ She clutched the sheet to her and wriggled into a sitting position. Her bland, efficient face was back in place but in fact he wasn’t even looking at her. He’d disappeared into the bathroom and she heard the decisive click of the door being locked.
Their time was at an end. He’d caught a whiff of something he hadn’t wanted, a whiff of her wanting what they had to continue, to see where it might lead, and he had scarpered faster than a speeding bullet. To his credit, he had stopped her from making an absolute fool of herself from which there would have been no going back.
On tenterhooks, Abby got dressed and eventually headed downstairs, to find him in the kitchen, chatting to his grandmother. He’d broken the news of their premature departure but had obviously buttered her up with promises to return.
His dark eyes on her were remote and polite. When he dutifully put his arms around her, in a show of intimacy Ava had come to expect, Abby could feel his distance as powerfully as a punch in the stomach.
And, just in case she hadn’t got the message, he didn’t accompany her upstairs when it was time for bed.
‘My report is going to take a while,’ he said as they stared at one another, she about to head upstairs and he about to move off into the opposite direction.
‘Is it?’ Abby asked quietly.
‘Yes, Abby. It is. You would do well not to wait up for me.’ He’d come that close to inviting her into his life for a bit longer. He would have done it. He would have risked his professional relationship with her because he still wanted her. Gabriel couldn’t believe that he had allowed himself to drop his guard the way he had purely because the sex had been so good. Was it because the circumstances were so extraordinary? Was that why he had behaved out of character? There could be no other explanation for it.
Now she was looking at him with calm, grey eyes, and he knew that if he looked hard enough he would see the hurt there. He raked his fingers through his hair and glanced away.
Abby felt caught between wanting to bring this all out into the open, lance the boil so to speak, and needing to close the lid on it before things were said and emotions declared that could never be taken back.
Close the lid, she thought, and at least she could continue with her job. Where else would she find another like it? It would be hard seeing him every day, and picking things up where they’d been left off when so much had changed between them, but she could do it. In a way, it might even be beneficial to see him return to his bad old ways, wining and dining his voluptuous dates before growing tired of them and dispatching them to Never-Never Land.
She would be able to put everything into perspective and move on, having endured the most important learning curve of her life.
And
if he found someone he wanted to make a permanent fixture in his life?
Abby felt her stomach lurch, as though she’d hit the top of the rollercoaster ride and was now swooping down with the ground flying towards her.
‘Sure,’ she said stiffly, hovering. He looked so damn awkward. She could practically feel the pity wafting off him in waves, and she tightened her mouth and straightened her back. ‘I forgot to mention,’ she said politely, ‘That I spoke to my dad about the money. I had some doubts that he would take it, but I managed to convince him that it was a windfall win on a lottery ticket and that I would be upset if he didn’t use it to make life comfortable for them once they get back from their round-the-world cruise.’
‘Lottery ticket?’ Gabriel was amused in spite of himself. ‘He fell for that?’
‘People believe what they want to believe,’ she said wryly, quoting him back at himself, and he shook his head because for just a moment there was a perfect understanding between them that made him want to walk towards her and kiss away every single thing that had been said since he’d left the bed and declared that work was beckoning.
‘Right.’ He pushed off and began heading towards the other wing of the villa.
‘Right,’ Abby parroted, turning away. ‘I’ll make sure I’m packed and ready to leave first thing.’
The bedroom had never felt so lonely, not even on that first night when she had stared with horror at a bed she was consigned to share with him. She had curled up on her side, trying to create as much distance between them, and had contemplated the time ahead with dread.
Now, bath done, hair washed and bags packed, she crept between the sheets and felt the emptiness next to her with something approaching despair.
She had no one to blame but herself, not that that was any consolation.
She had no idea when he came to bed but, despite tossing and turning and thinking that there was no way she could ever fall asleep—not when her nerves were all over the place—she must have nodded off because when she woke the following morning there was an indentation where he had lain, although he was nowhere to be seen.
Downstairs, she thought, ensconced in his office, catching up on all those important deals that suddenly needed sorting out. Anything to spare himself the embarrassment of having to face her because he’d seen that she had wanted to carry on a fling that had reached the end of its lifespan.
His case was by the front door, and she was looking at it when he emerged from the direction of the office at the far end of the villa.
‘I should go and get my bag,’ Abby said, half-turning.
‘No rush. I’ll bring it down when we’re ready to go.’
‘I... I wasn’t sure what to do with the clothes you bought for me here,’ she told him. ‘So I’ve left them in the wardrobe.’
‘Why?’ Gabriel looked at her, arms folded. ‘What am I supposed to do with a collection of women’s designer clothes?’
‘Don’t know,’ Abby told him with cool self-control. ‘I don’t honestly care, Gabriel. I wore them here to play a part but they’re not my style.’
‘Well, my grandmother will be startled if she opens the cupboard and finds that you’ve left half the stuff you’ve been wearing behind.’ He thought of that little bikini coming off, the pale green dress he had lifted so that he could get to her knickers, his whole body on full throttle, so hot for her that he’d scarcely been able to control himself. He clenched his jaw and looked away.
‘Well, it might provide a good opportunity for you to break the sad news of our break-up.’ She glanced at her finger where the engagement ring still glittered and gleamed. She would remove it just as soon as they were on their way back to reality. Right now, though, the twinkling diamonds were a mocking reminder of her foolishness.
Gabriel shrugged. ‘Fine. I’ll dispose of them.’ He paused, then stared at her with narrowed eyes. ‘I hope this episode isn’t going to alter our working relationship, Abby. Things happened, but I’m sincerely hoping that you’ll be able to put it all behind you.’
Abby noted that, by inference, he had already put it all behind him. She also wondered whether there’d been a threat implied by that bland remark. Was he implying that he would have to let her go otherwise?
Pride slammed into her and she returned his stare with one that was equally controlled. ‘Absolutely,’ she said. ‘Whatever mistaken impression you may have got, the whole episode, as you call it, is already behind me.’
CHAPTER NINE
Book me a table at my usual restaurant, Abby.
Two people.
Corner seat.
ABBY STARED DOWN at Gabriel’s distinctive writing. He’d left a note while she’d been out to lunch and she knew that he wouldn’t be back in until the following morning—meetings all afternoon.
Indeed, she had barely laid eyes on him since they’d returned from Seville ten days previously. True to his word, he had returned to spend the weekend with his grandmother. She had arranged his private jet. What had transpired? Had he told Ava that their engagement was no more? Abby didn’t know, because he hadn’t said a word about it, and that had made her unreasonably angry because damn it, she’d liked his grandmother, had bonded with her.
It was as though the minute she’d left Spain she’d left behind everything relating to it, so updates on how Ava was doing were no longer relevant.
They’d boarded the plane to London, she’d handed him back the engagement ring and that had been that.
Back to normal. Back to routine. Back to work.
He was once more her boss, except now there were subtle changes in their relationship. Of course he still relied on her to get everything right, and to do whatever overtime was needed. And he still trusted her enough barely to check the work she did. But gone was the lazy banter and that easy familiarity which she was only recognising, now that it was gone, had been there for ever.
He was polite but she knew that they were circling one another like strangers and it was killing her.
Was it likewise killing him?
No chance. She looked at the scribbled note and knew exactly what it meant. He was back in the dating game. That restaurant was his restaurant of choice when it came to dining out with a woman and the corner table was his preferred spot.
Abby took a few deep breaths and closed her eyes. She would book the table but this was the end of the road for her. She’d thought she could do this, could carry on working for him, putting things into perspective. She’d thought that the minute he started seeing other women it would be a resounding reminder of the sort of guy he was, deep down. Yes, he was a thousand things, a complex mosaic of personality traits that would turn any woman’s head, but primarily he was a commitment-phobe and a commitment-phobe was the last thing she needed.
Where a soul should be, was a block of ice. In the end, she’d counted for nothing.
She picked up the phone and dialled the special number she used that would ensure a corner table just as he liked it...
* * *
Gabriel stood at his office window, looking down but not really seeing the ebb and flow of people filling the pavements below. The expensive dinner he had booked the night before had been a resounding flop. His date had been too much of everything he hadn’t wanted: too tall, too busty, too flamboyant, too downright stupid, too self-obsessed. He’d been bored stiff after fifteen minutes and had only sat through the terminally dull evening through a sense of common courtesy.
She had been visibly gutted when he had sent her on her merry way at a little after eleven.
Maybe, he thought, it was time for him to move on from flamboyant, fun creatures, because it was patently obvious that the fun element of them had vanished.
He scowled and looked at his watch, then was annoyed with himself for doing that, because he knew that at the back of his mind he was checking to see how long it might be before Abby arrived.
He’d thought that a spot of replacement therapy might help put memories of h
er to rest. They were back in London, he’d reasoned. Even though his grandmother had yet to be told that the engagement was off, he’d felt the need to move on, to take back up the reins of his love life, which would include riffling through his little black book and going on a date.
The very second Abby had told him that she had feelings for him, he’d known that he had to step away. She’d tried to back away from a confession that had been spoken without editing, but it had been too late to take back what had been thoughtlessly blurted out.
There was not going to be a full-fledged relationship leading anywhere. He wasn’t up for that and he never would be. He’d made that clear. She might deny that that was what she wanted, but he’d known.
What choice had he had but to extricate himself?
He was never going to become a hopeless loser who handed over his emotional freedom to someone else. He was never going to allow anyone to have the power to hurt him. He had nurtured his independence and he wasn’t about to jettison it for anyone. He just wasn’t built that way, and he certainly wasn’t going to launch into any touchy-feely explanations as to why not.
She’d got herself into a mess, and that was unfortunate, but there you go. Life was full of unfortunate events.
But he hadn’t banked on bloody missing her just the way he did. He hadn’t banked on how tough it would be seeing her around the office, back to her usual cool, detached, smiling self. He’d perversely wished that she’d display at least some misery that their fling was over. He wondered whether he hadn’t overreacted, misread the signals. She was as cool as a cucumber around the office! Maybe he’d been wrong.
But Gabriel had unshakeable faith in his own powers of detection and knew that he’d done the right thing. He was just frustrated that he couldn’t put her behind him as easily as he had previous women and he surmised that that was because what they had had come to a premature end.
He still wanted her. It was no wonder she was still in his head! He was accustomed to ending relationships and then breathing a sigh of relief. He wasn’t accustomed to ending something that still had legs.
A Diamond Deal With Her Boss Page 13
