by Diana Fraser
“I’m simply stating the facts.”
“Okay, I accept they are facts as you see them now. But I want you to promise me something.”
“What?”
“I want you to give me a chance, to show you what love can be like between a man and a woman.”
“You’ve been so good to me, Xander, but I don’t know if I can do that for you.”
“I don’t want you to do that for me. I want you to do that for you. You deserve to know the truth about life, about love. You deserve a happy future. With or without me. Will you do that?”
“You wish to inflict upon me that which I fear the most? Why should I promise you something which I dread? Why would you do that to me?”
“Because you’re hurting, and I want to make you well.”
She shook her head and made a derisory sound, but he pressed his finger to her lips.
“Wait, give me a chance to explain. Say, you have a fear of flying, how do you treat that?”
“Not by flying. That would only make it worse.”
“You’re right. But by showing you, little by little, that you have nothing to fear, and everything to gain. I’ll show you how to change your thinking about it.”
“And how will you do that?”
“By making you feel good.” He pushed her hair from her face, and as his gaze roved over her face and he smiled so kindly at her, something melted inside. Fear. She wasn’t afraid of him anymore. “There will be no pain, no uncertainty, no fear. Do you trust me?”
She nodded. There was nothing else she could do. In that moment she committed to him in a way she’d never done to anyone else before. She trusted him with that thing she revered the most—her innermost fears.
“Good.” He stepped away from her. “We start tonight, after we reach the desert castle.”
“Tonight?” Fear suddenly reached up and grabbed her again.
“Tonight, Ela. We will sleep close to each other, and, if you are willing, I will hold you in my arms. And that is all I will do. Tonight then?”
Despite his plans, she knew that he was asking permission to continue.
She nodded, and summoned up a brief smile. “Tonight,” she confirmed.
But as she watched him walk away, she wondered what on earth she was letting herself in for. But, even as she wondered that, she felt calm inside. The calm was holding. At least for the time being.
Chapter 7
The desert sky at night usually comforted Elaheh, but not tonight.
Tonight, everything was too bright—from the star-sprinkled sky, to the lop-sided waning moon, no longer full but still shining too brightly onto the open plains which led to the desert castle of Havilah.
Elaheh bit her lip and stared out the car window, wishing the stony plains, burnished silver under the moonlight, would sink into the dark oblivion of the inky shadows which pooled beneath the rocky outcrops and be hidden from the world. And her along with it.
She didn’t want anyone to see her.
She didn’t want the world to bear witness to her fears.
She glanced at Xander who drove in silence, his narrowed gaze either looking directly ahead, or, occasionally, into his rear-vision mirror, to check his security team were still following. The lights from their cars confirmed their presence. Yet more lights in a world that seemed to be conspiring against her.
She looked out the window again. Despite the fact they were seated side by side, she felt distant from Xander, which was how she wanted to keep it. But she knew his intention was the opposite and it scared the hell out of her.
It had been easy to keep her fears at bay over the years—buried deep inside her, topped with the cement lid of her willpower—but that cement lid had been smashed by Xander. She’d gone over and over their conversation in her mind, trying to figure out how Xander had gotten her to tell him her secret. She’d decided she’d have been able to hold on to her secret if he hadn’t touched her.
She closed her eyes at the memory of how that simple touch to her arm—a caress so gentle and yet so insistent—had sent an invisible charge which had broken her defenses and sent the truth pouring out, leaving her afraid and wanting to crawl into the darkness where no one could get to her.
She swallowed and folded her arms across her stomach, trying to settle the rapid beating of her heart and the queasiness in her stomach.
Then she felt his swift gaze upon her and she felt as exposed as if she lay naked on the star-lit plain. Their gaze tangled briefly before they both abruptly looked away.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of, Ela,” Xander said quietly, as they approached the looming outline of the castle. “I would never hurt you, or do anything you don’t want to do. You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded. He also had an uncanny way of knowing how she was feeling. Xander, the arrogant playboy, had hidden depths about which she knew nothing.
“Don’t you?” He repeated the question, not seeing the movement of her head in the shadowy car.
“Yes,” she said, because it was true. Despite all her profound fears she trusted Xander, or else she wouldn’t have come. She cleared her throat. “Yes,” she repeated, louder. “I do.”
“Good,” he said. She could hear his relief in the exhaled word. “We should arrive in five minutes.”
Fear fluttered once more in her gut as she looked up at the castle, which grew larger with each passing mile. It was as dark as the sky was bright. But she knew it was a darkness which couldn’t hide her, that she’d be more exposed than ever once she stepped inside.
The fortress origins of the desert castle were impossible to hide. It loomed over the desert plains like a threat, which was exactly what it was. It represented an ancient power of the Havilah kingdom when it had been one land—a power which Xander had in spades. A power he was using both to protect her and to challenge her. It seemed one went with the other and she couldn’t stop it even if she wanted to. Because, bottom line, she knew he was right. She was still punishing herself for something bad that was done to her long ago. She knew it, but she didn’t feel it. And it seemed Xander wanted to help her to feel it.
Xander drove through the gates which were opened by unseen people and promptly closed again. She’d never entered the castle through the gate before. Her visits had always been by helicopter which meant she’d never seen the power of the castle before.
The car doors banged shut with an echoing metallic clang around the apparently deserted courtyard. Dust hung in the air from the car’s entrance, and dark shadows, cast by the soaring stone walls, loomed up on all sides. She paused for a moment and looked around. She was safe from external threat here—the writer of the threatening notes. She knew that. She was no longer in physical danger, but emotionally? She risked a quick glance at Xander who was waiting for her by the door, his eyes fixed on her, as if reading the very heart of her.
She took a long, slow breath of courage and walked towards him, focusing on his shoes. They were highly polished and the outside lights glanced off them. She stopped in front of him.
He lifted her chin with his finger and she looked up. He nodded. “That’s better. I hate it when you look down.”
“Why?”
“It’s not you. It’s not my fearsome Ela.”
She opened her eyes wide, surprised at his possessive words. “You like me being fearsome?”
He brought his head closer to hers. A faint smile played on his lips. “I like you, being you.”
She blinked as tears pricked her eyes. It was a strange compliment, not one she’d read about, but it got to her and it felt the most valuable thing anyone had ever said to her.
He stepped aside and indicated that she should enter the castle. She stepped into the great hall, brightly lit with flickering torches thrust into ancient wall sconces, and suddenly thought that the next time she stepped through these doors, she’d be a changed woman.
* * *
The more time Xander spent with this different versi
on of Ela, the more he believed he was doing the right thing. As some of his staff approached Ela, she looked to him for reassurance. He winced inside. He hated seeing her this way.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to hide from anyone inside the castle. That’s why we came here after all. It’s totally safe. No one can enter or leave unless I say so, and all telecommunications are monitored.”
She nodded, still appearing unsure, and he watched her follow the housekeeper and maid up the stairs to her room. As soon as she disappeared he turned to his butler.
“Whiskey, please. Make it a double.” He pushed his fingers through his short hair. “Second thoughts, bring me the bottle.”
“Certainly, Your Highness. Where do you wish me to bring it?”
“The first floor library.”
For all its fortress-like origins, and more recent uses as a hunting lodge, certain rooms in the desert castle had been refurbished over a century earlier like a London club. Incongruous, maybe, but Xander had never felt so grateful as when he closed the door to the hall, and was surrounded by the familiar smell of leather, books, and polish. The narrow stone-framed windows looked out to the distant horizon, a thick navy line scoring the division between the starry sky and the darker hamada plains, whose contours were highlighted by the silver light. He briefly looked to the foothills of the mountain range before drawing the curtains across. He hated looking at that place where the old Bedouin camp had been, now deserted. It was a place which he never wanted to visit again, and which brought back memories which still managed to cut him to the core.
He looked up as his servant entered the library with the whiskey and a tray of snacks.
“Will Her Royal Highness, Queen Elaheh be joining you, sir?”
He hesitated. Ela wasn’t the only one who was out of sorts. He shook his head. “No. We’ll have dinner in an hour.” An hour in which to gather his thoughts for the evening—and night—ahead.
* * *
Elaheh twisted and turned in front of the mirror, frowning at the beautiful cerise satin evening gown which she’d selected from the wardrobe of clothes Shakira had thoughtfully sent over to the desert castle ahead of their visit.
It wasn’t as demure and conservative as she usually wore, but bore all the hallmarks of Shakira’s more extrovert taste. Elaheh rarely wore western clothes but Xander had made it clear that they’d be dressing for dinner so she knew that none of the other smart daywear would be suitable. At least Shakira had selected the more conservative clothes with their full length, high neckline and long sleeves. But it wasn’t until she’d turned around and caught a glimpse of her rear view in the mirror that she realized the dress wasn’t as demure as she’d first thought.
The satin caught the light, making the most of her petite curves in a way she didn’t feel entirely comfortable with. But it was too late to change. She’d just have to make sure she didn’t present her rear view to Xander. Then the light caught her breasts and she closed her eyes with embarrassment. This dress, she realized belatedly, was designed to seduce, regardless of how little bare skin was showing, or even, because of it. She didn’t blame Shakira. Shakira breathed seduction—it was instinctive to her, and she wouldn’t have been aware that the dress would make Elaheh feel so uncomfortable.
She stood biting her lip in indecision, and caught the eye of the maid looking back at her. She had to confide in someone.
“I’m not sure, maybe I should wear something else.”
“I’m sorry, Your Majesty, but I’ve been informed that His Highness is expecting formal evening dress.”
She knew why. He’d made it clear that tonight would be a special night when he’d begin his seduction of her. And she had agreed, hadn’t she? She looked up into eyes that betrayed none of the courage with which Xander had attributed her. She blinked. This was ridiculous. She’d agreed to this, and she never reneged on an agreement. Nothing had changed. She still agreed that it was the way forward for her. So evening dress it was.
She tentatively fingered her newly curled hair which hung loose, like a cloak, providing her with some protection at least.. She shivered at the unfamiliar sensation of it against her skin. It made her feel a different person, which was what she wanted to be, wasn’t it? She nodded to herself as if the person in the mirror had answered her question and, with a swish of the long bias-cut skirt, Elaheh resolutely turned her back on her image and strode over to the door.
Elaheh felt unaccountably nervous as she walked down the wide sweep of stairs to the great hall. The swish of the satin gown as it brushed against the polished stone sent further shivers of something like anticipation down her spine. If there were staff present, they were hidden, behind the wooden doors and stone walls, in remote areas of the castle, catering for the needs of the two crowned heads of state, but invisible. For that, Ela was grateful. She wanted as few people as possible to bear witness to her seduction.
The double doors of the dining room opened as if her approach was observed and yet she could see no one. Xander rose from the far end of a vast table set for only two people. She knew he rose because she saw him out of the corner of her eye. For some reason she seemed unable to look at him directly.
Torch lights flickered, reacting to the opening doors, but settling again as the doors closed behind her and the servants disappeared, leaving only Xander and her in the room.
“Ela,” Xander greeted, his deep voice sending further shivers upon shivers across her skin.
She walked toward the first portrait and looked determinedly at it. “Xander,” she replied, looking up at a portrait very different to that of his great grandmother. This man was austere and autocratic. “You look like him,” she said, absorbing the strong lines of the man’s face, and the piercing eyes.
He didn’t reply but she heard him push a chair aside and his footsteps as he approached her. He stopped just short. She took a deep breath filled with his aftershave and something undefinably him. It did nothing to soothe her nerves.
“I should do. He was my great grandfather. It seems I’ve inherited the best of both my great-grandparents,” he said with a grin. “The other portraits are of Amir and Zavian’s families. A shared castle.”
“Once a shared land,” she murmured before turning to him.
“A shared land which paled in comparison to your own great and ancient lands of Tawazun.”
She nodded, pleased by his acknowledgement of her country’s superiority. It seemed he was trying to seduce her in more ways than the physical.
“My country is indeed great in size, but its growth has been stalled for generations.”
He took a step closer to her, and she turned back to the portrait. “No longer, Ela. We will work together to make sure Tawazun moves into a new era of prosperity.
She smiled at the thought of the new world they were creating for her country and, taken off guard, turned to him. He was closer than she’d imagined. Her smile fell.
He reached out and brushed the side of her mouth. “You have a beautiful smile. You don’t smile often enough.”
She blinked in time to her suddenly rapidly beating heart. “I don’t?” She didn’t recognize her voice. It sounded breathless and husky at the same time, nothing like her usual forthright no-nonsense tone.
His finger lingered on her cheek, tracing the brackets created by a smile, which unaccountably had found its way back to her face. His smile broadened.
“No, you don’t. But I’m hoping you will in the future.”
“Why?” she asked again in that newly husky voice. “Who can say what will happen in the future?”
“Me. I can. The immediate future anyway.”
And before she could react he tilted her chin gently up and kissed her. Life seemed to shift into a different, slower gear and she was acutely aware of ever nuance, every shift of his lips upon hers, his warm breath against her cheek. It lit up her body like a spark to a candle.
“Oh,” she breathed, when he withdrew, his fingers stil
l lingering against her cheek.
He sighed and stepped back. “Oh, indeed.” He frowned, turning away, and she felt bereft, as if the sun had just slipped behind a black cloud, leaving her in cold shadow. Instinctively she placed her hand where his had been only seconds before.
He shot her a brief smile. He gestured toward the table. “Please, take a seat. Dinner has already been served. I wished us to be alone, without servants hovering.”
She regained her senses and nodded, also brief. “Of course. We don’t want word to get out.”
He pulled out her chair, and she sat down, watching as he walked around the other side of the table, directly opposite. There would be no escaping his intense gaze.
He paused and then pulled in his chair, his hands steepling on the blackened oak table which was all the more beautiful for the marks of age it bore. “No word will get out, of that you can be assured. The staff have been hand-picked for this, and there is no possibility of them communicating without our knowledge. Every communication is being tracked. You are safe. No, the reason I wish us to be alone is an entirely personal one.”
She raised an eyebrow but didn’t dare speak in case it betrayed her nerves.
His eyes darkened as they met her gaze steadily. “Because I will be seducing you,” he continued. “And I thought you’d prefer privacy.”
She gave a brief nod of her head in agreement.
His lips quirked into a brief smile. “There’s nothing to be nervous about, the only thing to anticipate is…” He hesitated as his thoughts coalesced into one word. “Pleasure.”
She cleared her throat, reached out for her drink and took a sip. She placed it back on the table before replying. She, too, brought her steepled fingers together, her elbows resting on the table, her fingers tapping her lips. “You seem very sure.”
“About giving you pleasure? Of course.” He sat back in his seat, and looped one arm casually over the back of his chair.
