Knoxe was there, cradling me, protecting me. The commotion quieted as Tor, Pascal and Raze dealt with it. When I looked up from Knoxe’s rapidly pumping chest, Tor had a fae on his knees, a dagger at his chest.
“Call off the bugs.” Tor pressed the tip of his blade deeper into the Unseelie’s clothes and he gasped as the knife caught him.
“In Aryan’s pocket,” the fae rasped. “Top left.”
“Weakling.” One of his comrades spat on the ground.
Tor fished out a red velvet pouch and removed the contents. A dark grey powder. “What do I do with this?”
“Rub it on your neck,” the fae said.
“It could be a trick,” I said.
Tor sprinkled it anyway and lifted it to his neck.
“No.” Knoxe abandoned me to go to Tor, snatching the bag from him, and tipping out some powder. He rubbed it between his fingers, glanced at me with burning eyes, then at Tor. “I’ll do it.”
Goddamn Knoxe and his martyr complex. Always trying to save us. We should’ve been doing it together.
Knoxe frowned as he rubbed the powder on his neck.
Astra
I rubbed the back of my neck, relieved the damn bug was gone. Stitches prickled under my fingers, my skin stinging, raw and inflamed.
“All done.” The Unseelie healer patted my right hand, the one not being held by Knoxe, who sat beside me, stroking my palm with a finger.
Knoxe had found her in town, paid her a couple of coins that he’d taken from the Rarknul fae before we left them in the forest. She asked no questions, just got straight to work. Better we got medical attention in the Unseelie world than have to answer questions back at the Guardians. Questions that would expose our side hustle, broken rules, and unauthorized activity. Three things bound to land us in solitary confinement or on lockdown.
“Thank you.” I got up from her chair to join the rest of my team, sitting in front of the glowing hearth of her cave, warming themselves.
“Tor, you’re next,” Knoxe ordered, waiting until last to be attended to.
He’d insisted I go first and held my hand throughout the whole thing. The guy wasn’t normally touchy-feely, especially not with me, but today, the last few days, seemed to have really shaken him. The way he clutched me, tight, like he was afraid he’d lose me, proved my point. He didn’t have to go through this alone. As a team, we would go through it together.
His gaze didn’t leave mine the whole time, and the intensity forced me to look away more than once. Something else hid behind his concern, and I couldn’t tell what. If we found a moment alone later, I’d ask him, because knowing he carried this alone was eating me up inside.
It might have been completely innocent, and I probably read into it wrong, but the way he stroked my hand, reminded me of the casino. When I’d tensed at the table, he’d brushed my hand the same way, and after… came the most amazing night of my life. My first threesome with two gorgeous men.
The silly, romantic in me couldn’t help but draw connections that maybe he lied to me back at the Guardians, and told me it couldn’t happen again, because it was wrong, he was protecting himself from all the things he’d felt. But I needed to hear it from him. Because I couldn’t just let these feelings go. I had to see him every day in training, when we were doing research, and on missions. A constant reminder of what if. I’d settle for friends for now if he had some shit he needed to deal with. But I wasn’t going to let him go so easy. Not without a fight. Not when my heart shouted at me to make him mine.
Knoxe moved behind me to check the stitches in my neck. His touch warmed the chill that had settled in my bones.
I was glad for this mission. Glad it was over. Glad it had brought Knoxe and I closer. We’d been at each other’s throats for months until that night at the casino.
Tor broke my thoughts with a purr in Knoxe’s ear before he made his way to the healer’s seat, “You gonna hold my hand too, baby?”
Trust him to end the awkward silence.
“Yeah, baby.” I laughed, trying not to dwell too much on Knoxe when I could figure it out later.
Knoxe smirked at me and went to join Tor, grabbing his hand, squeezing it so hard it cracked.
“Jesus, babe, not so tight.” Tor jerked away, but Knoxe held firm, tickling the inside of his arm. “Mmm, that’s better. I wanna be treated like a queen, too.” Tor nestled into the chair.
“Princess, bitch.” Knoxe gave him a short pash full of tongue.
The healer gave us all a strange look. She obviously hadn’t seen two men into each other. And boy, were they. Knoxe gave Tor a lot of hell, but deep down, they’d always be friends. More than friends by the way they’d kissed in front of me in the infirmary, and apparently hooked up in the prison. Something I wanted to know more about, in graphic detail.
Raze and I laughed.
Pascal frowned, not understanding the joke. “Why is Knoxe hurting Tor?”
I explained the joke to him. “Oh. That’s funny.” He chuckled, but it sounded like he didn’t completely understand it, and did it to mimic us.
“Don’t do that,” I reminded him of our conversation from a couple of week’s ago, where I told him that he didn’t have to copy the others because he desperately wanted to be normal. That it was okay to just be himself. He was special. “Just be yourself.”
“I remember.” He smiled. “Knoxe as Tor’s girlfriend is funny.” Cute. He got it, and I pressed my palms together, glad for him, because he felt left out when he didn’t understand the humor. “Now, Tor has two girlfriends.”
We all laughed. God, it was good to be in a light and fun environment for a change. Things had been tense with all the shit going on. The last two days had been hell on top of that. I needed fun more than anything right now.
“You want to be Tor’s third girlfriend?” I teased Pascal.
“No. He’s too hairy.” We all laughed at Pascal’s honest response.
I inhaled a carefree breath. The pressure on my body discharged half of its strain. It didn’t alleviate the weight sitting on my shoulder at the prospect of facing the warden and lying to him. My stomach tightened preempting his reaction once he discovered five of his Guardians illegally released a prisoner.
We were in so much shit right now, and I didn’t want to think of the consequences.
On top of that, we had to contend with the Rarknul, who’d threatened vengeance. I’d be happy if I never saw the Unseelie or Rarknul ever again. But in this line of work, that wasn’t practical or possible. They’d be a thorn in our side if we ever entered the Unseelie realm. They had the capability to cross the veil into other worlds and hunt us. But I didn’t want to think about that. One thing at a time.
For now, I wanted to celebrate our survival. No small achievement given who were up against. I’d take the wins where I could get them, no matter how small. We’d figure out the rest as a team and go from there.
Raze stood quiet by the fire, lost in his thoughts by the way he stared into the flames, hands stuffed in his pocket, silent, thoughtful. He didn’t talk much. The guy was hard to get words out of. But he’d spoken fondly of his tribe and family when I’d followed him to his sacred spot and conversed with him.
I crossed to him and glanced at the long scratch along his neck. My fingers ran over the side of it. “You need to get that looked at.”
“It’ll heal,” he rumbled at me. Yes, it would with his shifter healing abilities. But he couldn’t keep hiding that from the team. They would become suspicious if he magically healed every time.
I widened my eyes, tightened my lips, then jerked my head.
“Fine,” he growled. I didn’t want to argue with him. Not here. Not in front of everyone else. His eyes flashed silver when he grabbed my jaw, firm and dominant, twisting it to examine my wound. “Are you in pain?”
I rubbed my tender neck again. “A little. But I can handle it.”
His gaze dipped to study the movement. He leaned in to sniff me, his n
ose nuzzling me, tickling me. Then his teeth nipped the side of my neck.
“Ouch.” I pulled away and stared at him. “What the hell was that for?”
He pulled back sharp and fast, looking at the ground, anywhere but me.
Pascal chuckled, and I stared at him. “He marked you.”
Raze’s cheeks turned as bright as the fire. “No, I didn’t,” he thundered in his deep, raspy voice that weakened my knees.
“You’re his now,” Pascal added with a smile.
Raze tried to laugh it off with a joke. “So are you, Pascal baby.” He opened his mouth and moved to bite Pascal.
“You’re even hairier.” I almost died at Pascal’s response, at how true it was, just in a different sense… Raze’s Lycan side and all.
I considered what Pascal said about me being Raze’s. What did that mean anyway? When I visited Pascal in his cell one night, he’d told me he could hear my melody when he touched me. I wondered if his newfound powers enabled him to read minds or emotions from people. On the wagon, he’d somehow known that Raze communed with his ancestors. The only way he could’ve known was if he saw spirits or if he read it somehow. Did he know Raze’s secret too? If he did, he leaned on the mantle, relaxed and unbothered by it.
All that drifted to the back of my mind, replaced by the statement Raze marked me as his. His what? Friend? Mate? Target. I discounted the last one. He’d had several opportunities to hurt me if he wanted to. I also doubted he marked me as a friend, because he hadn’t exactly been welcoming to me when I arrived, and had kept his distance since. I’d been the one to put in the effort and sought him out to get to know him. Surely he didn’t mean mate as the only option. Judging by my audiobook history, shifters were unable to resist the mating call of their mate, when it was stronger than emotions, more powerful. In most books, the fated mates very seldom had a choice once destiny had spoken for them and chosen their shifter mate. Oh fuck. Was I Raze’s mate? I wasn’t a Lycan! No. I was looking into it too deep.
But when I thought about it, I didn’t want to just be his friend. This man did strange things to my body, and it was hard to stay away from him, even though he always managed to put distance between us. Made me as horny as a wolf on heat. I respected that he didn’t want to get close to anyone and have his secret exposed.
The greedy flames inside me sought his heat, his closeness, and I pressed my hands to his face, drawing him down to me, stretching up my tiptoes to meet him. I kissed him long, hard and without mercy, the way he’d kissed me when I’d tried to stop his transformation in the captive ward of the prison. I hadn’t forgotten it, and certainly didn’t regret it. Never would.
“Fuck, woman,” he groaned. “You’re not making it easy on me. You want me to bite you again?”
I laughed nervously. He’d said something similar when I kissed him in the prisoner ward. His voice was gruff. Stark. Both then and now. Only this time, he pulled me in and kissed me back with intensity, with a growl in his throat, with hands that skimmed my back and pulled me closer until not even a sliver of light would fit between us. I melted into him. This was my moment.
His skin rippled and his body shuddered. I should’ve backed away, because his wolf fought for control. My lips tingled as I withdrew, staring at him, not wanting to leave his arms, but doing it for my safety.
Both Knoxe and Raze had kept me at arm’s length for different reasons. Funny how death had made them act different around me. Knoxe was protective and Raze, the alpha wolf, possessive. It made me want to get into trouble more often. Wink, wink.
Oh, God. Two more men to deal with on top of Tor. I liked them all, each in different ways, and wanted to explore more with every one of them. Knoxe and I were trying to stuff down our feelings and pretend they didn’t exist. Raze monstered-out when I got too close, making it hard for me to break down his walls. Pascal and I had a slow burn thing going on.
The Rarknul wasn’t going to destroy me. These men would.
Astra
After we left the healer’s house, Knoxe took us to a bar located inside of a tree that must have been thousands of years old. Creatures of all sorts gathered, snorting, spitting, and growling. All drinking. Unseelie with horns, wings, plants growing on them, tended to the customers. Magical blue fire blazed in the hearth providing light but not warmth. No one so much as glanced at us when we walked past. Not to say we blended in, but no one cared we didn’t.
When we sat down, Knoxe ordered the boys ales and me a wine, which the fae delivered quickly. Everyone drank in silence, glancing at each, smiling, nodding, tapping the sides of the goblets or tracing lines into the table. Fuck, this was awkward.
I finished my wine, a fruity thing ten times better than anything on earth, minus the bitterness, and ordered another round for the table when the waitress wandered past.
Finally, Knoxe slid out of his seat beside me and stood. “I just want to thank Raze and Pascal for stepping up today. I know it puts you in a tricky situation if we’re caught. But it means a lot to us.” He glanced at Tor and I on either side of him.
“Anytime.” Raze thumped a hand on Knoxe’s shoulder and jiggled.
Pascal nodded. “You’re my friends. I’d do anything for you.” Although he said it to all of us, he stared at me for a few seconds before averting his gaze.
“We couldn’t have done this without you.” Knoxe raised his glass to toast us. “To Raze and Pascal.” Tor opened his mouth to say something but Knoxe cut him off. “And my baby, Tor. Come here my love muffin.” Knoxe grabbed Tor’s head and pressed his nose to his nipples.
I laughed, enjoying the rare and lighter side of Knoxe. But I felt a bit left out, and wouldn’t have complained being pressed to Knoxe’s nipples or getting a mention.
“That means a lot, babe.” Tor grabbed Knoxe’s ass, and he jerked.
Knoxe turned to me. “And Astra, for melting those pumpkin seeds like a boss, and giving me time to knife that bastard!”
Wow. A rare compliment from the guy who gave them out as fleeting as shooting stars. I smiled and tucked my head. Only a few weeks ago, he hassled me about my poor combat technique, my terrible knife-throwing aim, and slow running speed. Now, I’d melted pumpkin seeds and earned a compliment.
Everyone cheered, and Knoxe rubbed me on the shoulder. One of my finer moments. I didn’t want my fear to get the best of me or for my team to perish because of my mistake with the insurance form.
Knoxe raised his goblet again. “Lastly. I appreciate your patience while I deal with my shit.”
All eyes flew to him and a heavy silence descended on the table. Knoxe never mentioned any of his problems, dealing with it by taking it out on us.
“Today is Jaz’s anniversary.” His voice wobbled on the last part. Jaz. Fuck. Their lost brother. The one I’d replaced. I gulped the sand in my throat. “I’d like to take a minute to toast him. To Jaz.”
Everyone echoed him, even me. I’d never met him, but Jaz’s existence had impacted me in many ways.
After a long gulp, Knoxe lifted his drink one final time. “And to the woman who’s had hard shoes to fill, but has continued to impress me with the way she fills them. To Astra!”
The team cheered for me, Tor the loudest, and he wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close, and I leaned my head on his arm.
Heat burned in my cheeks, and for once, I didn’t know what to say. All the emotions I’d battled the last few months surged to the surface. Tears pooled in my eyes, and I had to choke back a sob. I didn’t want to cry in front of my team. Knoxe’s speech had shocked me, and I hadn’t been expecting it, and I was touched that he acknowledged me when the topic of Jaz was hard for him.
“Oh, she’s gone shy.” Knoxe sat back down, nudged me with his shoulder, and I couldn’t wipe the grin of my face.
“Speech!” Tor shouted speech.
I elbowed him. “I’m not giving a speech.”
Knoxe’s hand slid along my leg, and he squeezed my thigh.
Oh, God. I didn’t know how to feel or react. The last time we did anything intimate, he said it couldn’t happen again. He found my hand, sat it on my thigh, and pressed his over mine. Fuck me. The fire he’d doused earlier reignited and heat swept over me. I had to say something, at least acknowledge the toast, but my mouth dried.
“Thank you,” I managed to croak and Knoxe smiled. He stared at me through eyelids at half mast. Fuck, he was sexy.
“You earned it.” He leaned in to whisper. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for me this last week. Without you, I wouldn’t have kept my shit together.”
His words meant more than I could admit. Knoxe was the one who affected me the most, and I never understood why. The past few months, I’d fought to stay away, but kept getting drawn back to him.
“Another one?” Tor held up my goblet.
“No.” I rubbed my eyebrow. I couldn’t fit in another bite or anymore wine. After the stress of the last few days, I hadn’t slept very well, and I needed some rest. “Think I’m going to head up to my room soon.” Although, I didn’t want to leave with Knoxe holding me like this, and Tor rubbing my other leg.
Tor shot out of his seat. “I’ll go with you.” Huh? I wasn’t ready to leave yet.
Knoxe drank the last of his mug. “I’m beat, too.”
“Me, three.” Raze swallowed the rest of his drink.
Pascal sat watching us as Knoxe tugged me out of my seat and into the space between the next table.
Shit. I thought I’d at least get another twenty minutes to bask in his warmth.
The heat of Tor and Knoxe standing close leapt onto me, set me on fire. My pulse pumped rapidly.
Today we’d been through hell and back. It wasn’t something I’d forget. Truth was, I didn’t want for this night to end, and I sure as hell didn’t want to be alone. This was a memorable day, and I wanted them all with me, to go deeper than we had before, and explore something we never had. Explore solidarity and unity as a team, just in a new way. Explore our budding feelings and relationships and where that might lead. The possibilities were endless. and I wanted to discover them, whatever happened, or whether it went beyond this night or not.
Wicked Souls: A Limited Edition Reverse Harem Romance Collection Page 40
