by S. Massery
She narrows her eyes. “You’re the photographer. That makes so much more sense. Especially seeing you right now. You’re more comfortable behind the lens—isn’t that the cliché saying? Do you get mad when people ask you that?”
I shift. “While it’s sort of true, I don’t get mad. I just like capturing beauty.” And intrigue. A lot of things can be solved with a photograph or two.
She hums. “Well, mystery solved. My roommate isn’t a psychopath who didn’t go to prom, she just avoided the camera at all costs.”
Well, I didn’t go to prom—but there’s no need to tell her that.
Someone bangs on the door. “Ruby?”
She winces and hops off my bed. “I’ll give you a head start if you want to change in the bathroom. My family is a lot.”
I laugh. “Thanks.”
“One sec!” Ruby yells.
I climb out of bed and snatch clothes from my closet, hurrying into the bathroom and flipping the lock. That’s another thing—who thought a dorm room would have its own bathroom? I hurry to change. Once I’ve managed with my clothes, ripped jeans, and a graphic t-shirt I got a few years ago, I unlock the door and turn my attention to my hair.
It’s wild.
If Amelie doesn’t straighten her hair, she gets nice waves.
If I don’t straighten my hair, or use any product, or even look at it wrong, it becomes a frizzy mess. I tame it down with my brush and hair oil. It was straight last night, but between drinking and sweating on the walk home…
Hopeless.
Nothing I try is working. I grimace and decide on space buns. Quirky, like me. I adjust my makeup to match and then gather my toiletries. I assume they’ll live in one of the drawers in the bathroom, but I’m not courageous enough to be the first one to claim a spot.
I slip back into the room and eye the crowd. They don’t notice me at first, so I put down my things and check my phone. Well, I open my phone so I can have something in my hand, and let my attention drift over the people on Ruby’s side of the room.
Ruby’s parents look like models. Dark hair like hers, tall and lithe. She didn’t inherit their height, but everything else… from the cut of her mother’s jaw to the uplifted nose and their wide smiles. It’s almost eerie.
Another boy, dark hair, tall. He bears a beautiful resemblance to them, too. I would guess a brother. A girl stands beside Ruby, removing items from her open suitcase. Everyone seems to be doing something. Unpacking or examining the space. And then I locate the last person, and my stomach flips.
Sebastian has already noticed me.
Again.
He’s by the window, much like Theo was last night in the frat house. Dark shirt, jeans. A smirk aimed at me. I slowly die on the inside, wondering who I had to piss off in a previous life for this to happen.
“Mystery girl,” he calls.
Everyone pauses and turns.
“You know Lucy?” Ruby asks him, eyes narrowing.
Sebastian grins. “We met last night.”
I shift. I don’t like the way he says it, like an innuendo—we met. Naked, dancing a horizontal tango. But now’s not the time to back down. I paste on a smile and say, “Right, I thought you looked familiar.”
His eye twitches.
Ruby snorts. “Leave my roommate alone, Seb.”
Seb. Bash. Sebastian.
He goes by too many names—like the Devil.
“Now that I know her name, things will get more interesting.” He winks at me.
“Ugh.” I turn away sharply, not wanting to feel this rattled by a little conversation. But I am. I’m like a normal college freshman, flustered by the handsome upperclassman. As soon as I realize how normal it is, it’ll evaporate.
“Lucy, these are my parents.” Ruby comes over and taking my hand. She squeezes twice again. “Everett and James.”
Her dad inclines his head when she says Everett—which means her mother is James?
“Nice to meet you,” I manage.
“My younger sister, Maisie,” she continues, pointing to the girl sliding shirts onto hangers at the bed. “And this is my older brother, Hale. He goes to LBU, too.”
Hale meets my eyes, and I try not to gasp. My initial impression of him being handsome—or even Sebastian being handsome, for that matter—are blown away when he faces me head-on. He’s devastating.
His gaze is cold, though, and he seems to stare right through me. He smiles politely and shakes my hand. I pull away quickly.
He might be scarier than Theo and me combined.
“Luce.” Ruby nudges me. “We were going to grab brunch, do you want to join us?”
I frown. “No, thanks. I’ve got to meet with Felicity.” She had mentioned setting me up with my ID card and helping me find the registration office for classes.
Ruby scoffs. “She’s busy with move-in. Our treat. Right, Mother?”
James nods. “Indeed. Join us, Lucy.”
When she says it, it doesn’t sound so much an invitation as it does an order.
“Great!” Ruby claps. “There’s a fabulous little café down the street. You might want a jacket. It’s chilly.”
I sigh and grab my denim jacket, buttoning it closed and shoving my feet into my shoes. I’ve gotten good at awkward family dinners, but somehow I think this is going to be worse.
“You’re a photographer?” Sebastian asks.
My attention snaps to him. He flips through my portfolio… which I had put in a drawer. Said drawer is wide open.
“Stop,” I demand. The need to keep that part of my life—hell, any part I don’t willingly reveal—private takes me by surprise. The force of it, anyway.
He doesn’t, just turns slightly away from me and keeps going. The creak of the binding is all I can hear for a moment.
I march forward, intending to rip it from his grip, but he easily dodges.
Someone sighs behind us.
“Give. It. Back.” I lunge.
Sebastian holds me back and raises a page. He shows it to Hale, who nods. I feel… unsure. Sebastian’s hand on my shoulder, his fingers bunching my shirt, is startlingly different from any touch that reminds me of Theo. Different, and I’m not totally sure it’s a good or bad thing.
He flips my portfolio book shut and hands it to me.
I’m tempted to smack him with it—but I don’t think my new roommate’s parents would think too kindly of me after that.
“So, brunch,” Maisie says. “I’m starving.”
Just like that, my good humor vanishes. I can’t think of anything worse than sitting at a table with these two. The invasion of privacy stings more than it should, but I have an intense desire to touch each photo and make sure Sebastian didn’t cause lasting damage.
“You have fun. I need to find Felicity,” I say.
Sadness creeps into Ruby’s eyes, but she nods and gestures for the rest of her family to exit ahead of her. When Hale passes, she smacks his shoulder.
“Control your friend,” she whispers.
He chuckles.
So he isn’t completely frozen, then.
“Sorry, Lucy,” Ruby says. “I just… I had hoped we could be friends, but I’d understand if Seb ruined that.”
I force myself to set down the portfolio. Some of my most precious memories are in here, captured through my lens. But he couldn’t have known. “It’s fine. I just don’t like people snooping through my stuff.”
She grimaces. “He won’t be back in here. Promise.”
“Thank you.”
She taps her fingers on the door. “We can grab dinner later. If you’re around.”
“Sure.”
Once she’s gone, I flop sideways onto my bed and peek at the portfolio. I can’t imagine what would’ve caught his attention—what would’ve prompted him to show Hale, so the two could be in on a joke together at my expense.
This is what I wanted. A college experience. Normalcy.
How’s that for looking a gift horse in the mouth
?
I scan the images until I come upon the football ones, and a lump forms in my throat. Most of them are action shots—which is what I had to do for the school paper. But they never saw the ones I took of the Emery-Rose Elite team. Theo’s team.
The rivalry between Emery-Rose and my school, Lion’s Head, was too strong. I couldn’t afford ridicule. Rather, more ridicule. I was the weird one. Quirky, Grandma used to say. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
I stop at the one that must’ve caught Sebastian’s attention. A fucking close-up of Theo after Emery-Rose scored. His teammates are a blur around him, but he’s looking at me. A rare smile graces his lips. I distinctly remember being caught off guard by his smile. He never smiled at me. I could hear his voice bouncing around my head, repeating the age-old taunt: Take a picture, it’ll last longer. He seemed frozen when I raised my camera to my eye and clicked, three rapid photos in a row. Just in case.
And here it is. Sandwiched in the middle of the stack of photos. My favorite.
Sebastian and Hale now think they know something about Theo and me.
Assumptions are dangerous.
I take a deep breath and close the portfolio, tucking it back in its drawer. I need to hunt down Felicity, get food, and figure out my way around campus. And if I can manage to avoid any and all interaction with the football team, I’ll be in even better shape.
There. An easy plan for the day.
8
Theo
Move-in day is a crazy mess. The only way I survive the chaos is because I live off campus. Generally, we arrive early to start football practice. The coach had at-home training exercises for us, so the first two weeks back is one big fitness test. It also serves to bond the team, I think.
Team bonding was something I didn’t buy into at Emery-Rose. I had my three close friends, and that was enough for me. To everyone else, I was closed off. High and mighty, or just too intimidating for anyone to fuck with me. Too quiet—that unnerved a lot of people.
These guys have no such reservations.
Hale and Sebastian find me in the gym. Hale is the captain, the star quarterback, and a cunning fucker. He and I get along—barely—because I don’t push his buttons or contest his authority. I don’t really give a shit that he runs things, to be honest. He can take all the girls and attention at the parties, order the team around.
As I said: I couldn’t care less.
Sebastian, on the other hand, has maintained his reputation as the wild one. He’s always up to something, on and off the field. Less trustworthy, more fun. In a dangerous way, like holding a rattlesnake and hoping it won’t sink its fangs into you.
“Alistair,” Hale greets me.
Sebastian has stepped up to the other side of my treadmill.
I eye Hale and lower the speed. If they want me to talk, I’ll need to be able to breathe—not sprint like my life depends on it, as I was before they walked in. “Devereux. Redmond.”
“Tell us about Lucy Page,” Hale says.
I narrow my eyes and say nothing. I don’t know why they’re asking about her, but I sure as fuck don’t like it. I hide that, though. Hale would see it, and Sebastian would act on it.
Or maybe they already know?
Know what, though? That we have a push-and-pull relationship? That we love to torment each other?
“She’s cute.” Sebastian says it in an offhanded way, but I sense he’s trying to judge where I stand. “I think I might ask her out.”
I snort, shoving down my annoyance. “Good luck.”
For a moment, all that fills my ears is the whir of the treadmill and my footsteps.
“Who is she to you?” Hale asks.
I hit the stop button and jump off. Patting my face and neck with a towel, I glower at him. “What the hell did she do to leave such a lasting impression, Devereux? And better yet, why are you running to me about it?”
He smiles. “She has a nice photo of you.”
I still. “What?”
“In her portfolio. You were smiling at her. Haven’t seen you smile… hell, maybe ever.”
My mind tries to catch up with all the pieces of information they’re giving me. If they both saw it, then they were in close proximity to her—and it. In her room, then? Why? And why the fuck would she show them?
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say instead. “She and I went to middle school together, and then I transferred schools.”
“And now you’re back together,” Sebastian says. “Well, maybe not together…”
“I’m not really sure I like where you’re going with this.” I cross my arms. It’s getting harder to wrestle my emotions under control.
“Just checking to see if you laid claim on her,” Sebastian explains. “But it sounds like that’s a no?”
“As I said: good luck with that.” I shake my head.
I’m going to kill her.
Or them.
“Wait,” Hale snaps.
I contemplate ignoring him, but the season has barely begun. I can play nice with their weird mind games. So I tilt my head and wait patiently for his question. Or statement. Or whatever threat might come out of his mouth.
The stories that precede Sebastian Redmond and his best friend… enough to make some lesser men think twice about playing football at LBU. They’re not opposed to using force to get their way. I don’t know how the rumors reached me, but I’ve got to respect it. My friends and I operated the same way. Bulldozers on the lacrosse field. Pot stirrers. If there was a fight to be had, one of us was bound to goad it out of the opposing team.
“Do you know what photo I’m talking about?” Sebastian asks.
I try to think back to a time when I smiled at her and she caught it on camera, but my mind is blank. A football game, maybe. Ah. It hits me. We were playing Lion’s Head and scored, which cinched our journey to the state championships. I felt lighter than I ever had, and I instinctively looked over at the Lion’s Head side, to where Lux was standing with her camera.
She didn’t seem crestfallen that her team lost by one fucking point. She was staring holes in my head, her expression weird, and then she slowly lifted her camera to her eye.
I nod now. “I never saw it, but I’m pretty sure I’d only have smiled if we won a game.”
I don’t know why she never showed it to me, and I’m annoyed that I have to find out from these two shitheads.
“Miserable bastard,” Sebastian mutters.
“Go fuck yourself, Redmond.”
He scowls. “Good grief, Alistair. We’re trying to be nice.”
I laugh. Loudly. Them being nice is the furthest thing from the truth—I think Sebastian’s been doe-eyed over Lux since the party, and now he’s discovered competition.
As if.
“You can’t handle Lucy Page.” I lift my chin. “If you can…”
“You’ll back off,” Hale supplies. “If she goes on a date—”
“A date means nothing. You could take her to McDonalds and call it a date. The true test would be if she kissed you.” I can’t believe I’m saying this. I can’t believe I’m throwing this on the table, because this is Lux we’re discussing.
My Lux.
The demons in my chest rattle, refusing to give up claim to her. But they asked point blank, and I denied it. She must’ve, too.
Sebastian grins. “A kiss is easier than a date. We were dancing close enough to kiss last night—”
I lunge forward, my patience snapping.
Hale slides between us, grabbing my shoulders and propelling me backward. He only releases me when I shake him loose, tearing my gaze from Sebastian’s smug face.
Fuck. They danced? I missed that. I don’t miss much, either. Not when it comes to her. There’s a part of me that is desperate to tell them she is mine, that I changed my mind. But as she so subtly reminded me, I promised her I wouldn’t.
Our darkness is intertwined, but I can’t kiss her. Can’t touch her, not without force.
Sometimes our anger is the only thing that allows us contact. My hand on her face, wrapped around her throat, touching her full lips.
We abandoned hope of gentleness—or kindness—long ago.
She murdered someone, and I helped cover it up. That’s about as far from good as we get. But it hits me suddenly that she shouldn’t have to put up with me. With everything I can’t give her. For a moment, I war against the instincts that demand she’s mine and mine alone. I fight the waves of possessiveness.
“A kiss,” I say. “You have two weeks. Fail, and you leave her alone for good.”
Sebastian grins. “And what do I get if I win?”
I narrow my eyes and don’t reply. I don’t know what he wants—and maybe I’m too confident that he’ll lose. That Lux won’t pick him, even if I set her free of me.
Hale smirks. “How about if you win, Theo here will get a front row seat to the first time you fuck her. Initiation and all that. He’ll give you his blessing.”
I turn away before they can spot the revulsion and catch a quick glimpse of Sebastian’s face. It says, Checkmate. I curl my hands into fists.
“Or…” Sebastian sighs. “I’d hate to tell the school board about your cheating. The football team has a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to that.”
I wheel back around. “Excuse me?”
“Sebastian’s grades are excellent,” Hale cuts in. “Last year, he took the literature class you’re in this semester. It would be a shame if your paper accidentally got swapped out with one of his old ones… and they found out about it. In the interest of being a good sport, you’ll stay away from Lucy for the next two weeks. But if you so much as talk to her…”
Fucking hell.
I’m not short on money, but this school was going to help me go places. Football has been a way of pushing me away from my father’s lofty goals of being a shark-like businessman. I just don’t want to sit behind a desk my whole life, and LBU has a good football team. Division 1.
If I’m wrapped up in a cheating scandal, would any other school with a decent football team even touch me?
Doubtful.
Plus, if I was kicked out, Lux would be on her own.
“Fine,” I grit out. “Your time starts now.”
