by Grivante
“You all need to go inside and lock your doors. It’s not safe out here,” Jonah told them.
“Are you threatening us?” the guy standing next to the drunk growled.
“No,” Jonah pointed toward Burt’s house. “A bunch of pissed off and hungry zombies will be coming this way in a minute. You don’t want to be out here.”
The guys faced scrunched up, then he burst out laughing, bending over and slapping his knee. “You’re funny! Hey, Kim,” he waved to a woman behind them. “You’ve gotta come check these dudes out. They’re dressed up as redneck zombie killers.”
“Cute ones, too,” ugly Christmas sweater said and winked in Judas’s direction.
A caucasian woman wearing a black afro wig and a tight-white disco jumper walked over laughing. She wore a pile of gold chains on her neck including one with a small whistle. “They sure are, Alex.” She giggled and took a drink from her wine glass. “Are these the guys with our—”
“Look,” Jonah said, losing his patience. “I’m not fucking around. This is real, we’re—“
Fat Elvis held up a hand. “Nice try. I know what you guys are up to. This is an elaborate prank. You’re trying to get us freaked out so you can post it as a viral video.”
“We’re not making a video,” Jonah spat, “we’re—”
“They’re coming, Jonah,” Judas said, watching as Burt's back gate swung open and the glowing-eyed dead poured into the park.
“Oh, that’s great looking make-up,” one partier said, squinting in the darkness at the gore-faced mass of zombies stumbling in their direction.
“Sure you’re not,” fat Elvis continued, “Then what’s that?” He pointed in the sky above their heads.
They followed his finger and their mouths fell open when they saw a small four-propeller drone hovering there.
“What the hell?” Jonah shouted and moved to slip Burt’s arm from his shoulder.
The drone whirred, jumping higher.
“Oh no you don’t,” JJ muttered, swinging the shotgun up and supporting it against her shoulder.
Boom!
A shower of parts and fragments rained around them as the small aircraft careened into the air before plummeting to the ground.
“Nice shot,” Judas said.
“Thanks. I was a skeet shooting champ when I was in high school.”
“You never cease to amaze me,” Judas beamed.
Jonah faced the party, which had fallen silent.
The man at the fence stared at Jonah, his brow wrinkling worse than a bulldogs. “Why’d she go and do that? We woulda played along, I just didn’t want it to seem like we were stupid or anything.”
“Get inside!” Jonah spat, then turned back to Judas and Burt, slipping Burt’s arm over his again. “C’mon, let’s go.”
“Hey,” the man called out as they rushed away. “What about the video?”
“Get inside!” Jonah repeated and kept moving.
Behind them, someone opened the gate and the partiers spilled out into the park watching the approaching horde.
“Woo-hoo! It’s the zombie apocalypse!”
Part X - Zombie Fowl
Ahead of them, Jonah saw a golf cart approaching from the other side of the park. He slowed again, putting his free hand on Brutus.
“Why was there a drone following us?” JJ asked as she and Xanadu stopped behind them.
“I don’t know,” Jonah replied, squinting to see who was driving the vehicle in the darkness. It pulled to a stop a few feet away.
“Something isn't right around here,” JJ said, scanning the sky for more intruders.
A white-haired elderly woman wearing a long cream-colored nightgown leaned out of the cart, peering over a pair of reading glasses. Beside her, a thin man in flannel pajamas grinned at them while rubbing the whisp of gray hair that remained on the right side of his head.
The woman pushed her glasses to the ridge of her nose. “It’s passed Michael’s bedtime you know.” She pointed her thumb at the man in the seat. “You need to quiet down out here.”
“Ma’am,” Jonah stepped closer. “It’d be best if you and your husband—”
“Man-friend,” the woman interrupted.
“Ok, man-friend. Get inside, there’s a zombie outbreak happening.”
“Zombies? I don’t believe in those.”
“Ok, ma’am, well, it’s still not safe out here right now.”
“Wait, I do have a plan for them though. I’ll carry one of those poison pills with me and when the zombie apocalypse starts, I’ll take the pill. It’ll get me and them too when they eat me!” She cackled.
Jonah’s forehead scrunched as he thought about her plan and shook his head. “That’s not exactly how it works, ma’am.”
Screams sounded from the party as the small horde of dead came upon it.
“Now that’s just too much,” the elderly woman said, pressing on the gas pedal and putting her cart back in motion. “We’re gonna go tell them to be quiet!”
“No,” Jonah shouted after them. “Please don’t do that, just go home, lock your doors and go to bed!”
The electric motor whirred and the cart pulled away. The man in the passenger seat continued to grin at them, nodding. “Who were they, Dustie?” he asked.
Judas cocked his head to the side as he watched them drive off. “Hey, an electric cart is a smart idea.” He looked at Jonah. “Maybe I should get one. That’d solve a lot of problems and I wouldn’t have to take that damn driver’s test tomorrow.”
From between them, Burt choked back a laugh and stared at Judas. “You still don’t have your license?”
“No,” Judas frowned. “I’m supposed to—”
Jonah watched the cart head straight toward the party, now a massacre, before veering off to the right. A few of the dead hobbled in pursuit of it.
Jonah closed his eyes and sighed. “Just once I wish someone would listen to me.”
“What do we do now, Jonah?”
“We need to get inside. Find somewhere we can defend if needed and figure out what is happening here.” He pointed to a house further down the row. No lights were on. "That one might be empty. Let’s try there.”
Ten-foot-tall shrubs walled off the left part of the yard. A greenhouse and the vague shape of something resembling a chicken coop stood out in the darkness near the back porch.
Jonah opened the chain-link gate and ushered everyone in. “Flashlights on,” he said, clicking his own and sweeping its beam across the yard. “We don’t want any surprises coming at us out of the dark.”
“You got it, bro,” Judas said, turning to JJ. “Mine’s on a clip on the underside of my Boomstick, can you grab it for me?”
She giggled. “Sure thing, Sugar!” She undid it and handed it over to him. “Do you want this back?” she offered the butt of the shotgun in his direction.
He shook his head. “Will you hang on to it for me?”
JJ smiled and winked at him. “I’ll hang on to your big gun any day.”
Jonah spun around, finding Judas's face lit up once again. JJ flashed them both a devilish grin.
With a sigh, Jonah walked away and continued sweeping the yard with his flashlight. “JJ, you’re gonna make his head explode.”
“Oh, c’mon,” she laughed. “You know I’m every man’s dream.”
“I’ll second that," Burt spoke up from where he leaned against the back gate.
Judas glared at him, eyes narrowing.
Jonah stopped, turning to shine his light in their faces. First at Judas, then JJ, then Burt. “Now. Is. Not. The. Time!” He said pausing between each word. “I don’t want to have to bury one of you because you were too busy flirting.” He paused, waiting as they all looked to the ground. In the silence, the sounds of screaming from the party increased. He shined his light on the house. “Let’s check our approach.”
They spread out, making their way through the yard, maneuvering around planters and large rocks. Jonah took t
he right, which was mostly barren and led to a dark shadowed patch running along the side of the house. Judas worked the left, scanning the shape of the greenhouse. JJ came up the middle, Burt resting an arm on her shoulder to steady himself.
Behind them, Xanadu watched. First, he scanned the darkness near Jonah, then shifted to examine the two small structures next to Judas. The greenhouse sat quiet but beneath the chicken coop, something caught his attention. A vague shape crouched, shivering and scared. Xanadu crept along beside Judas, keeping low to the ground, his hackles up. Cat?
“Looks like they enjoy gardening,” Judas said as his light played over the greenhouse.
“Oh, I always liked gardening too,” JJ chimed in.
“Yeah?” Judas inquired. “What did you like to grow? Flowers, veggies?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” JJ shrugged. “I just like the part where you take the little starts out of the plastic trays and spank them to loosen the roots.”
Judas turned his light on JJ, illuminating her standing there in her skimpy cheerleading outfit, holding the shotgun at the ready. “So you…?”
She smiled at him. “Yeah, I guess I just liked the spanking part.”
Judas’s eyes widened, mouth falling open.
“Clear!” Jonah shouted from the other side, having checked the area in shadows. He swung the light across the porch where two lone patio chairs faced out toward the park. Nothing there. He shined the light over the coop as the others moved closer.
A skittering sounded and he turned the light to the narrow entrance and the board running to the ground from the coop. A large black rooster with red tail feathers raced down the plank heading straight toward JJ. Xanadu let out a bark and JJ caught sight of the bird as it hurtled at her, lifting into the air and making a shrieking noise.
JJ swung the shotgun up, screamed, and pulled the trigger.
The blast made them jump, Burt stumbled backward and fell, twisting his ankle and crying out. Both Jonah and Judas pointed their guns and lights directly in front of JJ. On the ground, half of the rooster’s body lay in a splatter of red ooze and fleshy chunks. Bloodied feathers fluttered in the air.
Under the chicken coop, the small shape Xanadu had been watching ran off under the porch, triggering his canine chase response. He took off after it.
“What was it?” Judas barked, stepping closer and shining his light around for additional threats. “Zombie chickens?”
“There’s no such thing as zombie chickens, Judas,” Jonah shouted and moved to where JJ stood, shaking. The smoking barrels still pointed at the blasted bird’s remains.
“Then why’d she shoot it, Jonah? There were zombie yetis, remember? Why couldn’t there be zombie chickens?”
Jonah clicked his light off. “If there were such a thing, Judas, the zombies would’ve taken over a long time ago.” He placed a hand on JJ’s trembling right arm and applied pressure until she lowered the shotgun. “Now, what was that about, honey?”
She looked from the carnage into Jonah’s eyes. Her pupils were wide, her cheeks white. “I… I… thought it was a turkey.”
Jonah shared a quick glance with Judas, both of them mirroring the same concerned look as the gentle shower of black feathers drifted between them.
“Zombie turkey?” Judas mouthed to his brother, then shrugged.
JJ turned to Jonah, her eyes moist and wide. “Have you ever seen turkeys mate?”
“Uh, no.”
“They squash ‘em. Just lay on top and smash the hens into the dirt.”
“Ok,” Jonah nodded, waiting for more.
“When I was a little girl, we visited some relatives who owned a farm. I was walking around and saw this massive gobbler mauling a hen. When I asked my mom what was happening, she told me how they mate. It wasn’t a big deal, and today I find that forceful action kinda hot, but later that day I was wandering around by myself. I heard a gobble and turned. This huge tom the size of an ostrich was staring me down. I spun and rushed away. It followed, gobbling and jumping high into the air.”
She shivered at the memory.
“I tore off running in the wrong direction and it gave chase. It terrified me. My little girl mind conjured up images of what it had done to that female earlier. I ran and ran, way out into a part of the farmland I’d never been in. In the process of losing that damn bird, I got lost myself. Scared that every sound I heard was that turkey trying to sneak up on me. It took most of the night before my family found me. I hate the damn things. I’m sorry.” She looked at the dead mass at her feet. “In the dark, I saw that and my childhood terror kicked in. I just pulled the trigger.”
Jonah let out a soft chuckle and squeezed his hand on her arm. “I’m sorry that happened to you, JJ. You gonna be okay?”
She sniffed and smiled. “Yeah, it may not be a turkey but I feel pretty satisfied, finally getting to shoot one.”
Judas walked over. “I bet you hate Thanksgiving, huh?”
She laughed, her smile widening. “No. Actually, it's my favorite. They come home frozen and cook up tasty. I don’t mind eating them one bit.”
Burt sat on the patio steps, chuckling as he panted. “You three are quite the combo.”
“Well thanks, sugar.” JJ joined him at the back porch.
“Let’s get inside and regroup,” Jonah said, peering through the glass pane of the door. “That shotgun blast should’ve brought the living or the dead to the door if anyone was home.” He tried the knob. It was unlocked.
A shrill whistle sounded behind them and they spun to look out into the park. The woman they’d met earlier in the jumpsuit and afro stumbled past. The whistle around her neck was now between her lips. She blew a constant shriek from it. Close on her heels came a half-dozen of the dead.
Jonah pulled Brutus from its holster and stepped down the stairs as the woman fell.
The zombies, no green eyes, Jonah noticed, were on top of her before he could get close enough to help. He turned and walked back up the steps.
“What was she blowing that whistle for?” Judas whispered.
“It’s a rape whistle,” JJ said. “Women wear them around their necks to keep them handy. They use them to draw attention if someone finds themselves in a dangerous situation.”
“All that did was create a feeding frenzy. C’mon,” Jonah turned and opened the door, “let’s get inside before they notice we’re here.”
By the patio, Xanadu disappeared underneath, following in the direction of the fleeing shape.
Part XI - Xian-Do
The porch led into a modest kitchen, which had a table at its center. On the table sat a black cat-shaped bowl of candy filled with orange packages. A wall containing an oven, a microwave, and a counter with a sink in it separated the kitchen from the rest of the house. An archway on each side of the wall opened into the living area. A tapping sounded from somewhere they couldn’t see. Jonah held a finger to his lips and motioned to his brother to take the right as he went to the left. Judas took the shotgun back from JJ and gave his brother a thumbs up.
JJ helped Burt into one of the chairs at the table and drew the Pink Lady out of her thigh holster, shifting to scan outside. She stared as the zombies feasted on the disco queen. Something didn’t feel right. “How did things go wrong so fast?” she murmured to herself.
Glancing at the bowl on the table, she spied the bright orange packages of her favorite candy. “Ohh! Yay!” She plucked one out, opened it, brought it to her lips and suddenly wondered where Xanadu was. She looked around the kitchen and didn’t find him.
The brothers moved in, sweeping their weapons and lights back and forth, looking for threats. The origin of the tapping became clear at once, the front door stood wide open, bouncing on its hinges against the door stop. A hallway led off to the left. Jonah pointed both Brutus and his flashlight down the hall. Three doors, all closed, he nodded to Judas to head to the front. “Close it.”
Judas stopped at the door, spotting where splashes of blood so
aked the brick entry, then stepped onto the porch. He called inside to Jonah. “You better come look at this.”
Jonah joined him and took in the sight. A couple of blocks away, a dozen dead with green glowing eyes were milling about next to their Prius. More came from between nearby houses. Once near the car, they shuffled aimlessly until they started to wander off, then their eyes would flare green again and they’d turn back to the car.
Jonah bit his lip and pulled Judas inside, closing and locking the door.
“How is that possible, Jonah?”
Jonah rubbed the back of his neck and shook his head. “Something is very wrong here. She’s dead. So, who completed her work and why are they after us? Especially, after all this time?” He shook his head again, repeating, “She’s dead.”
Judas scowled. “Of course, she’s dead. She was locked in there with her experiments when we torched the place. How could she not be?”
“If not her, who?” Jonah asked, then whispered, “She can’t be alive.”
“Hey,” JJ called from the entry to the kitchen where she stood with the peanut butter cup in her hand. “What’s this whispering about dead girls without me?”
Judas looked up and burst out laughing, finding her smiling with the candy held to her mouth. Jonah continued biting his lip and concentrating.
JJ’s eyes narrowed as she studied him. “What is it, Jonah?”
He searched the room for inspiration. “I don’t know yet. I’m trying to figure out what’s going on here and not having much luck. Things just keep getting weirder.”
