by B. B. Reid
“So does your future cellmate.”
His smile quickly dropped, and with it, the idea of sparing me. It was just as well since I’d rather die than let him touch me.
“Have it your way.”
Preferring not to see death coming, I let my eyes drift close as my heart raced, and my hands shook. I never thought much about the end or cared for that matter how or when I would go, but now that it was here, all I could do was think about all the things I didn’t have the courage to do.
Like stealing a kiss from the boy I loved.
I had so many chances, and my only regret was that I didn’t seize the day.
Even though I knew there was no way out of this, I couldn’t resist vowing to take what was mine if given a chance.
As if accepting my vow, the sky opened up a moment later.
Instead of a ray of sunshine, however, there was a chorus of whooping laughter followed by wheels rolling down the paved alley. My eyes popped open, and I watched as the guys from the skatepark Butch and Woim chased me from as they crashed my execution. Leading them was Leo and Miles.
They quickly circled Fox’s cronies, and the rest of the crowd followed suit, putting distance between my executioners and me. Butch and Woim began to panic as they struggled to pick a target, and I prayed that whatever plan Leo and Miles had cooked up worked. The only thing worse than your own demise was being the cause of someone else’s.
“Now would be the time to run, Lou!”
After only a moment’s hesitation, I took advantage of Woim’s distraction, rescued my camera, and got out of dodge. However, when I reached the end of the alley, I couldn’t help looking back and worriedly meeting Miles’s gaze. He jerked his chin, a silent order to go, and I smiled. Mouthing a quick thank you, I took off down the street with the hope that they got away from Fox’s men unscathed.
I also knew that I wasn’t totally out of the woods yet. The city belonged to Fox, and after finding me so easily, he’d just made it clear that it was no longer safe for me.
Even though I had nowhere to run, I was eager to get there, and when I was out of breath, and my legs were weak, I planned to run some more. At least, that was plan until I was snatched from behind a mere block away. I tried to fight, but my captor was too strong. Stronger than I would have believed either Butch or Woim to be. I screamed when I couldn’t break free, but that was cut short when I was turned around.
The moment our eyes met, that relentless sense of familiarity returned, and against my better judgment, I relaxed in his arms. Even though I could probably trace his entire face from memory, he was a stranger to me. Still, he couldn’t have been worse than the men I’d just escaped. I was just glad he stepped in to save me this time.
The first time I saw him leaning against that pillar in Grand Central, I wasn’t close enough to see his eyes. If I had, I would have warned Wren. The second time I glimpsed him he’d kept his distance then, too. When I couldn’t think of a logical reason that I would remember the face of a stranger in a crowd, I told myself I’d imagined things. If only I’d realized sooner that it was because I’d been staring at its likeness almost every day.
I knew at that moment it was Wren’s father holding me. What else could explain the stormy blue invading this man’s cool gray eyes at that very moment? Certainly not my emotions, as Wren would claim. If that were true, this man’s eyes would resemble a kaleidoscope since I was feeling a million too many right now.
I was even starting to feel a familiar ache low in my belly the longer I studied him. It didn’t hold the same heat or intensity, but there was no denying its presence. This would be Wren in twenty years, and I had to say that despite the rags he wore, I wasn’t the least bit disappointed. Besides, I knew very well that he wasn’t the homeless man he was disguising himself to be.
Looking down, I studied exhibit one with a raised brow. Underneath the filth covering his shoes were treadless soles and creaseless black leather. Even the fingernails digging into my arm were evenly clipped and free of dirt, not to mention the ratty clothing covering his clean skin smelled like spring. Whenever I spent time on the streets, Wren often attributed finding me so quickly to his ability to smell me a mile away. How did a seemingly homeless man manage to keep himself so impeccably groomed?
Well, maybe not impeccable.
The salt and pepper beard covering his lower face was unkempt, but it only made his masculinity more rugged.
The Ghost of Fathers Past pulled something from his pocket and pointed. When I heard the unmistakable chirp of a car unlocking, it occurred to me that I should be struggling. He was Wren’s father, not mine.
“Hey, mister! One more step, and I start screaming!”
Of course, he didn’t even pretend to take my threat seriously and without missing a single step, continued pulling me toward a black BMW.
Definitely not homeless.
He hit another button on the remote, and this time, the trunk popped open. My eyes widened at the sight of a long rifle with a scope and the shovel lying next to it. I started screaming ‘stranger danger’ as loud as I could. Unfortunately, no one came to my rescue before I was thrown inside and closed in complete darkness.
An hour after my abduction, I sat huddled in the corner of some ramshackle motel room watching Ghost, as I not-so-affectionally dubbed him, rummage through my mother’s rucksack. It was clear he was looking for something, but there was nothing I owned that he could have possibly found useful. The only thing I took with me when I left the Hendersons’ for good was a few changes of clothes, my cameras, and the globe Wren gave me to remember the night we met. The only thing left to take for myself had been Wren. There was nothing else I cared about. After about five minutes, he gave up and set it aside. “Where’s your cell phone?”
“You could have just asked me. I might have saved you the time and told you that I lost it.”
He shot me an indignant look before sitting down across from me. I trembled a little under the full force of his attention. “Why is Exiled after you?” he interrogated.
“You mean Fox?” I mocked. “Your old running buddy?” He gave me a look so black that I was reminded of Wren whenever I pushed him too far. “I saw something.”
“What did you see?”
“Murder.”
My voice sounded heavy with grief for people I didn’t even know, and I could feel my eyes tearing up. I couldn’t stop seeing it no matter how much I pushed the memory away. Ghost didn’t react at first, but then he nodded once as if I’d told him the sky was blue, and he stood up.
I watched him pull his shirt over his head as he crossed the room, and my heart skipped a beat. The muscles bunching on his back with his every move were definitely impressive, but what truly held my attention was the huge black bird, perhaps a raven, circling high above frightening woods and the two little songbirds—one blue, one gold—who looked lost inside them.
Unzipping the black duffel he’d brought in with him, he pulled out a black T-shirt, and a moment later, the tattoo was gone before I could figure out its meaning.
“Aren’t you going to ask me who he killed?”
“You don’t know who,” he answered with confidence. “All you know is what you saw, and that’s more than enough for Fox. He’ll kill you and anyone who tries to protect you.”
I lifted my chin. “I guess you should let me go then.”
He let out a short, bitter laugh. “I’m not talking about me.”
My nostrils flared when I realized who he meant. “I see Wren gets his brooding personality honestly.”
Ghost had been peering out the window, appearing deep in thought when his head whipped around, and he stared back at me in surprise. After a few seconds, however, his expression became guarded. He probably decided I didn’t know anything and was only fishing.
I decided to put him out of his misery. “I know you’re his father.”
He cursed and started pacing before he stopped to glare daggers at me. “Don’t
tell him.”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” I said as I crossed my arms. “I don’t want you in his life any more than you want to be.”
The air in the musty room turned cold as he took a threatening step toward me. I sat up straight, ready to put that defensive move Wren taught me to good use.
“How the hell would you know what I want?”
“Simple. He thinks you’re dead, and you’re clearly not.”
“No, kid, I’m not, but I love my son.”
I scoffed. “Could have fooled me.” When he said nothing, I felt my heart break for Wren. “Why would you lie to him?”
“The only reason he’s still alive is that Fox thinks I’m dead.”
“But you’ve been stalking him all this time. Why didn’t you ever approach him? It’s not like you didn’t have plenty of opportunity.”
“Because I can’t be too sure when and what eyes are watching,” he argued. It sounded like complete bullshit to me.
“I think you’d know for sure by now if he was being watched. No offense, but you’re not all that great at the cloak and dagger thing. Even I spotted you.”
He laughed, but this time, there was some humor in it. “You saw me because I wanted you to.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why? Weren’t you afraid I’d say something to Wren?” He shrugged, and when he turned away, my eyes narrowed on his back. “You were hoping I would, weren’t you?”
“I had a few moments of weakness,” he grumbled, and I wondered if maybe it hadn’t been as easy for him to stay away as I assumed. “I’m just glad you know how to keep your mouth shut.”
I laughed then. “Your son wouldn’t agree.”
Ghost’s smile was small as his eyes shone with pride and longing, and I realized we shared something in common. We both loved his son.
Still, I couldn’t forgive him for leaving my best friend alone in a den of wolves, and Wren would tell me not to trust him, so I looked away. I heard what might have been a sigh from Ghost and then his footsteps as he crossed the room. Forcing my gaze away from the ugly-ass painting on the wall, my heart sped up as I watched him head for the door.
Was he leaving me here alone? Did I want him to?
“Stay here,” he ordered.
“Oh, phooey. I figured I’d go for a stroll through the park.”
I could tell he was fighting a smile when he frowned at me over his shoulder. “You’re not my son’s type,” he said, and it felt like I’d been kicked when I was already down until he added, “but I can see why he chose you. You’re good for him. You’ll keep his hands full.”
“You’re wrong on two counts. Wren and I are just friends, and I’m no good for anyone.”
He chuckled as if I had told a joke. “That’s the basis of human nature, kid. We crave the things we can’t have. Knowing we shouldn’t just makes our desires that much more enticing.”
He didn’t stick around for a rebuttal. The moment the door slammed shut behind him, I collapsed against the headboard and curled into a ball. My eyes never strayed from the door as I anxiously awaited Ghost’s return. An hour passed before my eyes drifted shut, and when they finally opened hours later, it wasn’t Ghost I found standing over me.
I screamed.
I WASN’T SURE HOW LONG I stood there watching Lou sleep like some creep, but when she opened her eyes and started screaming bloody murder, I was at last convinced that it was her and not a mirage. She was safe if…not all that sound. I felt the tension in my muscles melt away when I quickly slapped my hand over her mouth to mute her screams and felt her soft skin.
She’s real.
After days of no contact, I’d begun to lose hope. And when I got the call from the front desk clerk that I had a package waiting for me at a motel I’d never been to nor heard of, I assumed I’d gone insane.
Nevertheless, I vowed not to leave any stone unturned, so I came here half expecting it to be another wild-goose chase. If it weren’t, then she’d surely be dead. Bear had found his truck haphazardly parked outside his shop just hours after the cops on Fox’s payroll questioned him. Despite the extensive damage he’d mentioned finding when he called me, he’d been more concerned with Lou’s well-being. The reports that followed were even more harrowing. Not even Miles and Leo knew where she’d gone after they saved her from Fox’s men in the nick of time. She’d completely disappeared.
“It’s me, little Valentine.”
She tore away from me, and my brows drew together when she scrambled across the bed.
What the hell? I followed after her wanting to pull her into my arms and comfort her, but she let loose a panicked cry, stopping me dead in my tracks. “Lou?”
“S-st-st-stay away from me.” Tears streamed down her face as she held her hand up, keeping me at bay.
“What the hell is wrong with you, Lou?” All this time, I’d feared my sanity when I should have been worried about hers. What the hell had she seen up there, and why was she treating me like I was some monster hiding under her bed? Maybe I am. I’d never hurt Lou, but right now, she was making it clear that she wasn’t convinced. Had she ever been?
I took a step back and then another until my back hit the wall. Only then did she calm down. My hands balled into fists, but I tucked them inside my jacket pocket so she wouldn’t see. Getting angry wouldn’t persuade her into trusting me.
The only sound for the longest time was her occasional sniffle as she rocked herself back and forth in a ball on the bed. I wanted to kill Fox for doing this to her. This girl cowering before me wasn’t my Lou.
“Are you going to hurt me?” she whispered after almost an hour had passed. Her gaze, however, remained fixed on the bedspread.
“No, Lou.” I kept my voice gentle when I wanted to rage. Two. Years. I’d given her two years of me, and she still didn’t see. I thought she had. She’d even begun to convince me that I wasn’t a monster.
“Are you going to let him hurt me?”
My voice was hard and full of determination when I spoke. “Never.”
Finally, she looked at me, but her blue eyes burned with mistrust. “Why should I believe you?”
“You don’t have a choice,” I said losing my patience. “Without me, you’ll die, and I’m not about to let that happen.”
“I can take care of myself,” she coldly asserted.
“I won’t let you.”
For a moment, both of us seemed to stop breathing.
And then she lunged. Quicker than I’d ever seen her move, she grabbed a lamp from one of the nightstands, and I had only a second to duck before she sent it soaring through the air—right for my head. It hit the wall behind me, and by the time the shattered pieces finished falling to the shag carpet, she was out the door.
I caught up to her before her feet could even touch the gravel and was grateful for the empty parking lot.
“Let me go!” she screamed the second I snatched her up.
“Stop this.” I squeezed my arms around her in warning, but she was so far gone she continued to fight me. When her chest heaved up and down, and her body temperature rose at an alarming rate, I knew she was in danger of passing out at any moment. Still, she fought, but I wouldn’t let go.
“I hate you!” she roared just before she collapsed in my arms.
With my heart in two and my mind relentlessly replaying those three words, I carried her unconscious body to my car.
My fault. This was all my fault.
After making sure Lou was settled safely in the passenger seat, I trudged back inside the room and spotted her bag sitting in the room’s only chair. She once told me it belonged to her mother, which explained why I never saw her without it. Memories were important to Lou, and I bet if I looked inside, I’d find her cameras and the moments she’d captured. It was everything she held dear.
I lifted her bag by the strap, and as I turned to go, something slipped through the open flap and fell to the carpet with a heavy thud. Turning, I was immediately brought t
o my knees when I saw what had fallen from her bag. With a trembling hand, I lifted it, and for a long while, I could only stare at the fake snow falling over the miniaturized city and recall the promise I made to protect her.
I gritted my teeth knowing she’d put her faith in that promise, and I failed her. Utterly.
Getting Lou out of this alive was the only way to fix my broken promise, and if I managed to survive it, I’d make sure that she never saw me again. Even in the face of my guilt, my heart rebelled at the notion of walking away, but once she found out what I’d done, Lou, without a doubt, would, and I’d have no choice but to watch her go.
THE FIRST THING I NOTICED when I came to was the smell of salt carried on the cool breeze caressing my skin. I sat up with a start and stared out the window in alarm. Where the hell was I? Night had fallen, and there wasn’t much else to go on. Just trees and more trees on either side of the two-lane road. After about a minute of watching nothing but foliage go by, I found the courage to look to my left.
A seriously tense Wren gripped the steering wheel as he stared straight ahead, and I had the feeling he was forcing himself not to meet my gaze.
“You’re awake,” he greeted tightly.
“So I am.” And then I blinked when I tugged at my memory but couldn’t recall how or when he found me. “Where are we?” Before he could answer, I glimpsed a large sign in my peripheral. “Sunset Bay,” I read aloud. My curiosity piqued when I recalled the name of the town Wren visited every Sunday. Suddenly, everything came flooding back—the Hendersons, my stupid determination to track Wren down and beg him not to let me go, and the brutal slaying I’d witnessed in the mountains. Everything that happened after that was completely shrouded. “Why are we here?”
“You need to lie low until I can convince Fox not to kill you.”
I returned to staring out the window as my entire body went numb. I watched but didn’t really see any of the shops and people we passed as we drove through the small town. “We both know that’s not going to happen.”
