by Ivy Smoak
Best Year Ever
By Ivy Smoak
Copyright 2018 Ivy Smoak
All Rights Reserved
To all the wrong turns that led me here.
Who knew that they were right all along?
CONTENTS
Title
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
A Note From Ivy
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Also by Ivy Smoak
Copyright
Chapter 1
Sunday
I closed out my register for the final time. The satisfying cha-ching it made was drowned out by an incoming text alert. I pulled out my phone to see a message from my best friend, Penny:
“Emergency! I called him again and took too long to hang up. I think I left a voicemail of myself breathing really loudly. What do I do? Call again to apologize?”
I laughed and quickly typed out a response. “Would you stop starting every text with emergency? It makes them all less of an emergency when you do that. And I told you not to call him again. Seriously, put down your phone.”
For the past two days I had been receiving countless texts from her with similar degrees of distress. She had gone to campus early in hopes of rekindling her flame from last semester. Despite my recommendation not to. And now I was pretty sure she was knee deep in a bowl of ice cream. I know what you’re thinking…knee deep in a bowl? That’s not possible. But trust me, Penny stress eats ice cream like a champ. Luckily for her it all goes straight to her boobs.
Regardless, she needed me to get to campus to hide her phone from her. And I needed to finish packing so I could get there as soon as possible. Before she did something even stupider than breathing loudly on a voicemail like a total creeper.
The cashier with the next shift was leaning against the counter chewing a wad of gum impossibly loudly. She always did that. And it always drove me insane.
“You all closed out?” she asked.
“Yup. The cash register is all yours. I’m outta here.” I threw my free hand into the air, expecting some kind of applause. Or goodbye. Or something.
Her bored expression didn’t change. “Until tomorrow?”
I tried not to roll my eyes. “Nope, I’m heading back to school. I’m officially hanging up my hat.”
“We don’t wear hats.” She popped her gum.
I was going to kill her if she made one more freaking sound with that gum. “It’s a figure of speech, Lydia.”
“Whatever. See you around.”
Not the send-off I wanted, but it was the one I was expecting. Couldn’t expect any more from Lydia, the world’s worst cashier and human. Later bitch! I turned on my heel and practically ran out of the department store. I’m free! All I had to show for it was my smile and almost a thousand dollars in the bank. Which seemed measly for the torture I had endured all summer, and was nothing to brag about since I was up to my neck in student loans. A thousand bucks wouldn’t even put a dent in it.
My phone beeped again. I pulled it out and shook my head.
“EMERGENCY! God, Melissa I think I just did it again. Will he know it’s me breathing?”
I laughed out loud as I climbed into my car. “Penny, I’ll be there tomorrow morning. Think you can stop being a total mouth-breather until I get there?”
Her response came almost immediately. “Maybe?”
I laughed and tossed my phone onto the passenger’s seat. I needed to get my ass in packing mode. My best friend needed saving.
***
“Mom have you seen my blue dress?”
My question didn’t garner a response.
“Mom?” I walked out of my room and down the hall. The kitchen was empty except for the dishes piled in the sink. I looked out the window. My mom was sitting on the porch swing out front. When I opened the door, I smiled at the tune of the cicada’s buzzing. It was the soundtrack of my summers.
She looked up at me. “Hey, sweetheart. How’s the packing going?”
“Have you seen my blue dress?” I sat down next to her and pulled my knees up to my chest. God, I loved it out here. Darkness as far as the eyes could see, the only lights a twinkling of fireflies.
“Oh, the pretty one that flares out at the bottom?”
“Yeah, that one.”
She put her arm around me and pulled me into her side. “Would you believe me if I told you I had no idea where it was?”
“Nope.”
She laughed. “You caught me then. It’s in my closet, but don’t worry, I just washed it.”
I used to get mad at her for borrowing my clothes without asking. Not so much anymore. I missed her when I was in college. I let my head rest on her shoulder. I was going to miss this place. And I knew if I didn’t get back to packing, I’d stay out here all night just staring at the nothingness. That was fine for some people. But for me? I had big dreams.
College was my escape from small-town life. Not that Newark was NYC or anything. But it beat where I was from. Good old southern Delaware. Where nothing ever happens. Take it from a local. Trust me, I know. The southern part of Delaware is notoriously known as “Slower Lower.” And I hate that. But I also totally get it. There’s a lot of cows and farmland. And stupidly annoying people like Lydia. God I hope I never have to see her face again.
“You can keep the dress,” I said. “I should probably get back to packing.”
“Thanks, sweetheart.” She kissed the side of my forehead. “Need some help?”
“Actually, I’d love some. I can’t close the lid to my suitcase again.”
“And you need my butt?” She laughed and let her arm fall from around my shoulders. “One butt, at your service.”
“Mom,” I protested, but I laughed too. She followed me back into the house, leaving the cicadas and vast openness behind us.
“Maybe after we’re done packing we can go to that ice cream place you love?”
The ice cream place I used to love. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I was trying my hardest not to eat ice cream anymore. Unlike Penny, the extra calories liked to appear in places other than my girls. “That sounds great.”
A few stuffed suitcases later, my mom put the car into park outside the local ice cream joint.
“Oh is that Connor?” my mom asked. “I always loved Connor, I still have no idea why the two of you called it quits.” She unbuckled her seatbelt and climbed out of the car before I had a chance to respond.
Connor Barnes. My first boyfriend ever. My first heartbreak. A handsome asshole that I really wished I didn’t have to see during my last night here. I sighed and slowly followed my mom, who was bee-lining straight to him.
“Hey, Ms. Monroe.” He gave her a hug. “How have you been?”
“Good, good. And what about you? We haven’t seen you around in ages.”
At the mention of “we” his eyes quickly found mine. And for the briefest of moments, I remembered looking into them and seeing my future. But the thought disappeared as quickly as it had come. Because whatever Connor wanted from this life, it 100 percent was not me. He didn’t understand my motivations for leaving this town. He didn’t understand me. And it was devastating that he had never taken the time to truly try. I had been getting over him one night stand at a time during my first year of college. Nothing serious. Ever. What was the point of my heart breaking again a few years down the road when I left Newark? I wanted to go to a great law school one day. Not just one close by.
But whatever I was doing clearly wasn’t working. Because seeing him made my chest ache. Not because I wanted to get back together with him again. Hell no to that. It
was because he had given me hope that maybe true love did exist. And then squashed it when he told me he didn’t want me to go to the University of New Castle. What kind of true love was that?
“Hey, Melissa.” Unlike with my mom, he didn’t make a move to hug me. He looked cold and rigid. Pretty much the same way he did when I told him my mouth could do better things in this world than suck his tiny dick. Fine, maybe I didn’t say those exact words. But that’s how I liked to remember it. The blubbering version of our breakup wasn’t nearly as fun as my pretend memory.
“One mint chocolate chip,” some chick said and handed Connor an ice cream cone.
I waited for her to walk back to the shop, but instead she turned to me and my mother. “Hi. Are you friends of Connor’s?” She slipped her hand around his waist and I felt like I was going to throw up when I saw the shimmer of a ring on her finger. And not just any finger. Her ring finger on her left hand. That finger. The one that was reserved exclusively for engagement rings. I lifted my eyes back to Connor’s.
“Melissa was just a friend from high school,” he said. “And this is her mom.”
Just a friend? God, what an asshole. You took my virginity you ignorant prick.
“Oh, hi. I’m Jenny. It’s so nice to meet you.” She pulled her hand off of Connor’s waist and held it out to me. Maybe the girl was left handed or maybe she was a total douche bag.
I plastered a smile on my face and shook it. “Are you a friend of Connor’s too?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer.
She laughed. “I’d say we’re a little more than friends.” She turned her hand around to show me the ring closer up, as if I needed a better view of her blood diamond. “We’re getting married this winter.”
I desperately wanted to make fun of the fact that the diamond was small or that the ring was hideous. But it wasn’t and it wasn’t. “Congrats,” I said as genuinely as I could muster and let my gaze drift back to Connor.
He had a smug look on his face. Like he was thinking, “Coulda, shoulda, woulda, bitch.”
And in a way he was right. Coulda hated the rest of my life if I had stayed in this town. Shoulda kicked him in the balls when I had the chance. Woulda never been happy with him. Fucking fuckity fuck. I awkwardly cleared my throat. “Well, I’m starving. Catch y’all later.” Y’all? Seriously? I was back here for three months and I was saying y’all again? Kill me now.
“Engaged? Oh my,” my mom said as we stepped up to the counter to place our orders.
I ignored her and started stuffing my face with ice cream as soon as the bowl was put into my hands. Who’s knee deep in a bowl of sympathy ice cream now?
“Really, I never understood what happened between the two of you,” my mom said as she sat down on a bench with me. “That could have been you, sweetheart. We could have been planning your wedding right now.”
I blinked away the tears in my eyes before they had a chance to fall. I never told her what had happened because I thought that was the reaction she’d have. Like I’d be lucky to stay here forever and get married too early and pop out babies every other year. She hadn’t exactly been thrilled with the idea of me going to school so far away from her either. At least she’d never tell me to stay. She’d never voice it even if it was written on her face.
But it still stung that getting engaged to an asshole was what she wanted for me. Not that the asshole part was necessarily part of it. But married? Yes, she wanted that. I was only 19. I didn’t want to get married and settle down. I wanted so much more than this. But I also didn’t want to have secrets from my mom.
“He told me he wanted me to pass on going to the University of New Castle. He asked me to stay.”
“Well that’s romantic.”
I looked down at my empty bowl of ice cream. See.
“And idiotic.”
I lifted my gaze back to her. “Idiotic?”
She took a spoonful of her ice cream and plopped it into my empty bowl. “Yes, idiotic. You have high hopes. And anyone asking you to come down from your dreams isn’t worth your time. End of story.”
End of story. I blinked back my tears again. I can’t believe I ever had doubts about her not wanting me to achieve my dreams. Her not wanting me to go to school far away had nothing to do with her not wanting me to chase my dreams and everything to do with missing me when I was gone. I missed her too. That’s why I called her a bajillion times a week. “Thanks, Mom.”
“Don’t you ever let a man dictate your life.”
This would have been a good time to ask about my father. A perfect segue. But I had learned a long time ago not to ask about him. Not because she minded that I had questions. But because my lame excuse for a dad sounded like a bigger dickweed than Connor. And a father that didn’t want me was one that I didn’t want to know. Besides, I had the best mom in the world.
“Who needs men anyway?” my mom said. “Us Monroe girls have to stick together.”
I rested my head on her shoulder. “Always and forever.”
“Always and forever, sweetheart.”
Chapter 2
Monday
I parked my car outside my new dorm building and took a deep breath. A new school year always made me feel all jittery. So many possibilities. But first and foremost, I needed to take care of my friend. And move all my shit inside. I pulled out my phone and clicked on Penny’s name. “Hey! Guess what?”
“Please tell me you’re here?” she asked.
I waited a beat to make her wonder and then spit out, “I’m here!”
She squealed into the phone. “Be out in a sec.” The line went dead.
I climbed out of my car and popped the trunk. This was going to take us forever. Why did I always insist on bringing so much stuff with me? I leaned against the car and watched several guys playing a game of basketball across the parking lot.
Last year, I would have marched right up to them and asked if they’d help unload my car. But this year? I was a little shaken from seeing Connor with a freaking child fiancée. It had been the exact opposite of a boost of confidence. I watched as one of the guys jumped and landed the perfect shot.
He was smiling and laughing as he turned around. He high-fived one of his teammates and then ran his fingers through his dark brown hair. There was something so carefree about him. And I had the oddest sensation that his heart had never been stomped on before. That his conscience was as light as air. That he would never try to break me.
For just a second, our eyes locked. His smile seemed to grow even brighter. And I wished I was the same girl from last year. I wished I could wave him over or at least smile back. But my hand stayed by my side. And my lips didn’t turn into a grin. Instead, my stomach felt like it turned inside out and my heart started racing. God, what is wrong with me?
“Melissa!”
I turned around just in time to see my bestie barreling toward me before she threw herself into my arms, practically knocking us both to the ground.
I laughed and pulled back. “God, I missed your face.”
“Really? This one?” She pointed to herself. “Because Austin certainly doesn’t miss it. Melissa, what am I going to do? I feel like such an idiot. I never should have come down here early. It was such a stupid idea.”
I tried to warn you. “What are we going to do?” I looked down and snatched her phone out of her hand. “We’re going to not look at this for the rest of the day for starters. Screw Austin. I want you all to myself anyway.” I made a kissy face at her.
She laughed and lifted up one of the boxes from my trunk. “Yeah. Screw him. I’m in serious need of Melissa time anyway.”
I glanced once more over my shoulder at the tall, dark, and handsome stranger. And I wished I had dated someone like him instead of Connor. Now it felt like I was too late. I was already damaged goods. I followed Penny into our new dorm.
***
After dumping all of my things in the middle of our floor, we had trekked up to Main Street to get our b
ooks before it started to rain. Unfortunately we didn’t quite make it in time. But luckily Penny had brought an umbrella that we both ducked underneath. She was definitely more practical than me. I wasn’t sure what I’d do without her.
“Score!” I said and turned toward Penny as I pulled a worn book off the shelf. “Got the last used copy.”
“Lucky. I have to get two new ones for sociology. What kind of professor requires brand new books?”
I laughed. “Who are your professors this semester?” It was always fun talking about classes because we were never in the same ones. She was getting a business degree so we didn’t have much overlap. But I liked picturing her awkward professors when she’d tell me stories. I’d need names for whatever I conjured up in my mind.
“Um…” she looked down at the paper on top of her pile of books. “Professor McCarty, Thornton, Briggs, Edwards, and Hunter.
“Hunter sounds familiar. I feel like I knew someone that took a class with him…it is a him, right?”
Penny had stopped listening to me. She was already reading one of her textbooks.
“Earth to Penny.” I waved my hand in front of her face. “You’re going to have plenty of time to read that.”
“It never hurts to get a head start.”
I laughed as we made our way to the front of the store. “You’re probably right. But I think since classes haven’t started yet, we should try to just relax tonight.” I dropped my books on the checkout counter. There seemed to be way more of them this semester than usual. And I tried not to panic when I saw the prices as they were rung up. So much for the extra money from my summer job. I was pretty sure I was the un-relaxed one right now. The checkout girl practically had to yank my debit card out of my hand.
“New tradition,” Penny said. “How about we get a pizza on our way back? Grottos on the first night we’re reunited after summer and winter breaks.”
“Um…sure.” It felt like I was signing my life away as I scrawled my signature on the receipt. I had a dining hall plan that was already paid for upfront by my loans. And they always had pizza. Sure it wasn’t as good as Grottos, but in a sense it was free. Free if I didn’t think about the mountain of loans that had paid for it.
