by Rosaria, A.
Sarah stayed away from the meat. She remembered having read somewhere that frozen meat could only stay good for so long. She doubted that time to be longer than a year. Canned food it was. However, she took the gamble with some frozen peas and processed cheese she found. With a bag of pasta from the thousands in store, she made spaghetti with canned meatballs.
Priss and Vance came down and took their dinner to their new room. She ate alone with Geon. Neither of them talked. They weren’t friends. Never would be from the way Geon despised her. Besides, there was little to discuss.
With everyone fed and in their own room, it was time for her to relax. Sarah grabbed a towel from the cabinet and left for the communal showers. She must convince Geon later to grant her a better room. The man gave her the smallest one intentionally. She supposed he assigned himself a corporate room, though she guessed not his old one. In their previous search, they found no zombies on this floor. That little detail didn’t stop her from looking in every corner before rotating the faucet on. She admired the spray from the shower. The way the water showered down seemed magical after a year without. Electricity, water, food, and shelter, it gave a feeling of safety from the old days.
Sarah pulled off her dirty clothes and threw them in a corner. She’d wash them tomorrow. She stepped into the stream and moaned in delight. The water was not too warm or too cold, just right; it rinsed her hair and washed off the grime on her body, chasing away the foul smell. Carried away from a world of hardships and back into safe comfort, her muscles relaxed, feeling born again. With reluctance, she turned the faucet off and held her hand on it. Her skin started to break in goosebumps and her nipples grew hard. She couldn’t afford this feeling. With a groan, she let go and stepped away. Feeling the old world slide back on her shoulders, she grabbed her towel and rubbed herself dry. She heard footsteps behind her.
Sarah grumbled. “I won’t be showering together with you this time.” She turned around. “You fooled me once, you won’t—”
She frantically covered her body with the towel.
“I won’t what?” Vance said. He stood clothed in front of her, his eyes snaking over her body, lingering at the skin she couldn’t cover. “Damn, you look hella fine, make me wonder if I chose the right girl.”
“What the fuck are you doing in here? Is this a sick joke? Because it’s not funny.”
“No joke.” Vance gave her a once-over. “I heard the shower and decided to… investigate…” He chuckled.
“Leave!”
He smirked. “Are you going to make me?” He scrutinized her up and down. “I don’t see any guns on you. If I wanted, I could beat you right here and now.”
He was taller, larger, and stronger, but hell would freeze over before she allowed him to do to her any of the sick perversions he had planned in his little empty head. She stepped forward and prepared for an attack.
Vance clucked his tongue and backed away. “Don’t worry. I won’t. I chose Priss. I can build a future with her. While you? You are just for pumping and dumping. Someone else will get to you.”
“Fuck you.”
“Hey, you did me a solid, I’ll remember that, don’t you worry. I’ll take care of you. I’ll take real good care of you.”
“Nice way of showing it.”
“You’ll see. You’ll thank me later.” He left.
She stood, hands clamping the towel in front of her, her whole body shaking so much she could not move. She didn’t want to risk a slip and fall. If not for her promise to Priss to make it work, she would go grab her gun and blast his head off. The asshole was making it difficult for her to like him, or at least stand him. He was pushing her buttons hard. While he knew her threshold for bullshit was low, and had seen what she was capable of, and still, he was stupid enough to push despite it.
Sarah secured the towel around herself, picked up her dirty clothes, and rushed back to her room. In the hallway, she bumped into Geon heading for the shower. He frowned at her as she charged past him. She avoided his judgmental eyes and hurried on, saying nothing. He must have seen Vance leave before her and already made up his mind about what happened. He didn’t need to call her a slut; it was clear in those eyes.
She crashed inside her little room and slammed the door shut. She threw herself on the bed, only now realizing she was crying. Life outside was bad enough, why did it have to be this way between survivors? You would believe humanity would stick together when facing a common enemy, instead of fighting among themselves. That was total bullshit.
Sarah sat on her bed, contemplating if she should confide in Priss about what had happened. Priss was like a lovesick puppy clinging to Vance everywhere they went. She wouldn’t believe her. Bad as he was, he seemed to have genuinely chosen Priss to be his.
At the shower, she felt malice from him. She was sure he wanted to hurt her, and he could have, but he didn’t. Not out of the goodness of his heart, but because he wrote her off to go full in for Priss. She didn’t know what to think about that. It couldn’t be a good thing, could it? No. Priss wouldn’t believe her. That made it worse. She could do nothing about it. Confide in Geon? Try to convince him? To what end? To him, she was an empty shell of a woman with predictable behavior and needs. She didn’t want to feel like a captive in this place she wanted to make her home. If she stayed, she would be a wedge between Priss and Vance. Was she destined to leave just like she left Ralph? It seemed like it.
Sarah cleaned her P90. Her fingers traveled skillful over the parts, taking her mind off from her worries. After reassembling the carbine, she started with her revolver. With her guns cleaned and oiled, she loaded her clips and speed loaders. Geon had given her the ammo from the armory. Enough to fill the four clips and speed loaders she owned. Next, she oiled her knife. Done with that, she packed everything together, ready to leave when she needed to.
Sarah glanced at her watch and groaned. Less time passed than she hoped. She didn’t feel sleepy. She stared at the door. Stood up, opened the cabinet, and grabbed a guard’s black uniform. At almost six feet, with wide shoulders for a girl and matching hips, she was a tall and fit young woman. The uniform was a few sizes too large, but it fit snugly around her hips. She rolled up the sleeves and pants.
She examined the boots in her hands. Small feet for a man. Even so, she needed to wear extra socks to fit the boots better. She strapped her holster on and clipped her bowie knife to her belt. She hesitated a second about grabbing her P90 and left without.
Sarah paused at the neighboring door. From the outside, she guessed it to be twice the size. She swiped her keycard. The light flashed red. She grimaced. The bastard could have given her this room, it may even have its own shower. She followed the corridor to a crossing. Straight ahead were the communal showers, to her left the corporate suites, and to her right the depot, the stairs, and the elevator. She went right and climbed the staircase to the top floor. Using her pass, she exited the compound. The sliding door behind her clicked shut and the mock wall covered it from view.
She breathed in the fresh night air and glanced at the burned-out SUV and the freshly dug grave. Nothing else showed any humans ever existed. She made a mental note to herself that they must dispose of the wreck and cover the graves from view. There should be no hint of anyone ever having been in this area. No passersby should get an inclination to stop and investigate. A rueful smile crossed her lips at the thought. Before she left for good, she’d pass this idea on to the others. It grated her thinking a guy like Vance got to enjoy the safety of this compound while she would be back traveling the unsafe roads.
Sarah went down the path, wanting to sit at the picnic table and enjoy the night sky full of stars. She should be afraid of going outside at night, and alone at that, and she did, but not in the way she used to. She feared the wights and zombies like the African tribesman feared the lion. It didn’t stop them from going wherever they needed or wanted to go. They were careful about it, as they should. It was nature now. To always cower because a
predator larger than herself prowled the night was not the way she wanted to live life.
Sarah lay on her back on the picnic table and stargazed. She couldn’t make the constellations out. Ralph would be able to. If she were with him, they would have watched the stars together. Not like lovers, but like the friends they became. She sighed. That would never happen now. She wondered if he was watching up at the sky, that they at least shared that. She wiped a tear from her left eye.
“Is that all you do? Bawl like a baby?”
She drew her Ruger and aimed square between Geon’s eyes. He stood about ten feet from her in the shadows close to the mountain wall. He wore the same black uniform. The shirt fit snugly around his muscular body. Sarah wondered, not for the first time, how she could ever have imagined him being above sixty or even fifty. Cleaned up, she would make him at most for early forty. Still old, though.
Geon cocked his head. “Going to cash in your check?”
She lowered her gun. “Go away. I want to be alone.”
“Shooting me would solve that little problem.”
Sarah clenched her gun and threw it at his face. He flinched away too late. It hit square on his nose. Bone cracked. Blood gushed out. He grabbed his nose, cursing at her.
“I’ve done nothing to you. Why then are you like this with me? I’ve done my best to support you. I’ve tried not to be mean to you. Not even when you were out of your mind wandering around who knows the fuck where. I just want to be alone.”
She hated herself for crying. She hated it. So many times she was sure she would stop, but the tears kept coming. And who cared if she did? She was human. A girl. She’d never have the life she imagined. And it seemed in this shit of an apocalypse she couldn’t keep anyone in her life. Not Ralph. Not Priss. She didn’t need a cold, cruel bastard reproaching her about her crying. She was glad she threw the gun at him. If it were still in her hand right now, she would shoot him dead.
“You done with your bitching?”
“What’s wrong with you?”
Geon picked up her revolver. He studied it, barked out a laugh, aimed it at her, and pulled the trigger.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
The shot echoed in the silence. The muzzle flash blinded her and then came the pain. She dropped to her knees clasping her shoulder.
“Oops,” said Geon with glee in his voice. “I guess I failed at not hitting you.”
She glared at him. Blood seeped through her fingers. It stung and burned. She released her hands to look. “You shot me.”
“Don’t be a baby, it’s just a scratch.”
He held her gun loosely in his hand, pointed at her, just the way he held it before he shot her. She froze, her eyes narrowed. He looked from her to the gun, reversed it and offered it back to her. The gun felt awkward in her left hand. He grimaced at her as he wrinkled his nose. “You got me good there. Are you now going to finish the job?”
Sarah examined her shoulder. An angry red stripe carved a way into her skin. Deep enough to bleed, not deep enough to damage her muscle. She flexed her fingers and changed the gun to her right hand. To grip it meant pain, but at least it felt comfortable. She pointed it at his face, and considered about returning the favor but holstered her gun.
“Your wife is dead, and so is your daughter, but we all lost our families. You have no reason to be like this.”
“You didn’t cause yours to die.”
“It doesn’t feel like it if it’s you who are bashing their brains in after they turned.” She sat at the table and rested her head on the tabletop, silent tears creasing her cheeks.
“It’s too much. First him, then you, and now you again. Isn’t it bad enough with the apocalypse being on us? Do we also need this shit between ourselves?”
Geon settled opposite her. “Says the woman who gets into arguments daily with her best friend, sleeps around with her best friend’s boyfriend, and who breaks a man’s nose for being harsh toward her.”
Sarah hid her face and groaned. “I didn’t have sex with Vance.”
“He came out after you.”
“Yeah, you saw that, and you assumed wrong. He walked in on me showering and threatened me.”
Geon grabbed her shoulders and forced her to sit up straight. It hurt like hell.
“Look at me,” he said.
She did. His eyes pierced hers. She was too tired and fed up to feel the chill she usually felt looking into those eyes.
“Is it true? You didn’t sleep around?”
She spat the words out. “I did not.”
“Shit.” Geon stared the way he came. “Damn.”
Sarah pushed him aside. “What?”
“I overheard him claiming to Priss that it was you who came on to him and dragged him to the showers and tried to give him head.”
Sarah stiffened and paled, looking at Geon, paralyzed. After a moment she shook her head. “And you believed him?”
Geon threw up his hands. “Well, yes, you seem the type.”
“Oh, God, you are an asshole.”
Vance wanted her gone for good. She would have left by herself, but not this way. Not with Priss thinking the worst of her. “I have to convince her about the truth.”
Geon grabbed her wrist before she could stand up. “That’s not the smart thing to do.”
She tried to yank her arm free, but he held on, tightening his grip.
“Sarah, Priss is beyond herself right now, she won’t trust anything you have to say.”
Sarah stared long at his bloodied face and his crooked nose. She did that to him. Good. He deserved that for the contempt he showed her before. Believing the prick at face value. Condemning her before asking her. Shooting her.
“I don’t need your support.”
“Sit down.”
They stared at each other. She sat.
“He’s been telling me stuff about you, and it fit my first impressions of you. He claimed that he found two good guys he thought could aid us and convinced them to join us. That you shot them in cold blood and threatened to do the same to him after accusing him of colluding with them.”
“It didn’t happen like that.”
“Did you shoot them in cold blood?”
Sarah nodded.
“Did you threaten him?”
Sarah nodded. “But—”
“You did those things. That makes anything he said about what happened ring true. Do you understand why I dislike you?”
Sarah didn’t know why she kept expecting him to be subtle about things and not sledgehammer her with what he said whenever he opened his mouth. At least now it was out in the open. She wasn’t crazy imagining it. She’d been right all this time. Now she wondered if he hated her.
“I see myself in you.”
Sarah blushed and averted her eyes.
“Not in that way. Psychologically.”
Sarah’s face reddened some more. After all the things happening, her mind still went there. Maybe she was indeed a horrible slut.
“Vance lied. Those guys were forcing him at gunpoint up the slope, that left me little time to think it through.”
“Were they?”
“Yes!”
Geon sighed. “Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t. You killed them, you threatened Vance, you had your reasons, but you made it so easy for him to turn that story around. Especially after you kept quiet about what happened.”
“He asked me to.”
“You don’t seem stupid, but you sure act stupid at times.”
“I promised Priss I would be nice to him.”
“You can be nice to people without being dumb about it. You should have told Priss what happened. You should have told me.”
Perhaps she should have, but neither had seemed ready to pay attention to her, or at least take what she said at face value. Priss once may have, but not with Vance’s claws dug deep into her. And Geon? He was an asshole.
“He ratted us out to save himself,” Sarah said.
“Yeah,
you are right about that. You did good.”
The stars shone eternally bright in the sky, though she knew a few of those stars didn’t exist anymore, yet they persevered long after. Life should be beautiful like that. A life lived should reverberate in those left behind. Not like this. Being killed on suspicion. Or being the one doing the killing.
“You’re doubting if you did well?”
Sarah didn’t understand. Telling Priss now would add more senseless drama that would distance Priss from her. That is if there was any relationship left after the shit Vance pulled off. She would accept the blame if it were true. However, Priss didn’t know better. Sarah frowned. Something didn’t add up. She glared at Geon. He should know better.
“You are way too sly to trust him.”
“Who said I did?”
“The things you told me.”
“What about that?”
“They are hurtful.”
Geon huffed. “That’s because I don’t like you. I thought I made myself clear to you about that.”
Sarah felt thrown in the deep with the one holding the lifesaver not willing to throw it at her.
“What do we do about it?”
“Who said there is a we?”
She heard a scrape over a stone. As she turned to look, she drew her gun and shot in the direction the sound came from. A man cried out, clutching his belly. Sarah fled, not waiting to find out if more men were coming behind the one she shot. Geon cursed and sprinted after her.
“Guess this makes it a we,” he said.
Sarah glanced at Geon and winced. His face was a mask wicked with glee; eyes burning with a hatred looked back at her. She didn’t know if it was meant for her or the men chasing them.
“Run ahead and open the door,” Sarah said, “I’ll hold them off.”
Bullets whizzed by, followed by a pop and the boom. She whirled around, kneeled, and emptied her revolver. The men hit the ground for cover. Under the bright moon and starlight, she spotted them as shadows milling about. They wore night vision goggles. She didn’t bother to reload. No point, they would have shot her before she finished.
