I took the drink he was offering and his gaze stayed hooked on mine while I drank, mischief sparkling in his eyes that said he knew something I wasn't allowed to know.
"Come on then, let me see your best slut drop," I teased, walking away from him to the middle of the room where a bunch of girls were grinding together to the beat of Ice Cream by Blackpink and Selena Gomez.
I started dancing as soon as I made it to them, closing my eyes and tilting my head back as I tried to drown myself in the music. I needed to be free of everything tonight. Even if it didn't last and I was going to come crashing back down to reality with a bang the moment I opened my eyes again. For this moment, this dead girl just wanted to feel alive. I’d made a speciality out of letting go of all the shit I had going on and living in the moment so it was easy for me to give in to the pull of the enjoyment that was waiting to be had here. It was the only way I’d found to survive the cesspit of my life and it was working out pretty damn peachy so far. So long as I kept my focus on the shallow things I had going on, I never had to worry about drowning in the darkness of the deep.
Someone moved up behind me and an arm curled around my waist as he drew me back against his chest. I knew it was JJ even without the scent of him making my senses prickle as the mixture of almond oil and sea air wrapped around me as tightly as his arms. There was just a part of my soul that was always going to ache for the boys these men had once been and would recognise them even in the dark.
JJ tugged me close so that my ass was pressed against his crotch and our hips fell into this impossibly perfect rhythm together as we both moved to the beat of the music. I reached my arm over my shoulder, gripping the back of his hair as I held him close and he kept his hands on my hips. I knew I shouldn’t have been doing it, but there was something about the fact that I couldn’t see him that made it feel like I was buying myself a little freedom to pretend that there wasn’t an uncrossable divide between us now. Like I could pretend I didn’t know him and didn’t feel the ache in my heart which throbbed a little harder with his arms around me.
The more we moved like that together, the more heat began to build in my core, the aching, needy part of me wanting to take him up on the offer he'd made and just use him to take away some of the hurt and fear I'd been feeling ever since I'd woken up in that grave.
The songs merged from one to the next, JJ's hands slipping to caress the hem of my dress as my breath hitched and temptation did its best job to lure me into its trap. I wanted to feel wanted. To believe I wasn’t disposable. But I also knew this man who was holding me close had proved that he had no issue with throwing me away once before.
"What part of she's mine did you fail to grasp?" Fox's cold voice snapped me out of my less than ladylike fantasies about JJ and my eyes popped open as I found him standing before us, his face a deadly mask and murder in his eyes.
"Chill out, man, we're just dancing," JJ said, but his hands slid from my body all the same and he took a step back. "Besides, this is Rogue. We've been waiting a long time to see which one of us she'd pick. I think it's only fair that she gets a chance to see-"
"The last time I checked this was my crew," Fox snarled. "My house. My gang. My money. And my girl. Don't go thinking that just because I love you, you don't have to play by the fucking rules JJ. You know exactly who you're fucking with right now. So either back the fuck off or I'll make you."
JJ tsked like he wanted to say something else then flicked a glance at the crowd of people watching. I knew how this play went. I'd been running with these kinds of men for way too long. When it came down to it, Fox was the boss and his word was law. If JJ didn't fall into line then the shit was going to hit the fan and a point was going to have to be made, especially with this many people watching.
"I'm not your anything, Fox," I said loudly, drawing his attention back around to me. "I don't know what it is that you think gives you the right to lay claim on people, but I'm not your property or anyone else’s. If you seriously wanted me to be your girl, you might wanna try a little harder at winning me around. Because right about now, the idea of tying myself to you makes me wanna gouge my eyes out with a rusty spoon."
I shoved past JJ and made a move towards the pool, but Fox's hand latched around my wrist before I could escape and he tugged me towards him, his eyes burning with fury.
All around us people had scurried away, but I could feel the eyes of every single person at this party on us all the same.
JJ stepped forward like he intended to get between us, but Chase appeared and caught his shoulder, yanking him back and leaning in close to say something to him that I couldn't hear.
Whatever it was seemed to be enough to make JJ back down though as he turned and headed away without another word.
Fox didn't release me, tugging me after him as he started walking and the crowd parted like the tide to let us through. He kept going until we reached the door opposite the tv room which was always locked. He produced a key and opened it before shoving me inside where I found a set of stairs leading down into the dark.
"Get your ass moving Rogue before I change my mind about punishing the two of you publicly," he growled and something about the raw anger in his voice made me obey him for once as I took hold of the bannister and headed into the shadows at the foot of the stairs.
Fox flicked a light on which illuminated the space at the bottom of the stairs and I quickened my pace as I headed down.
At the bottom of the stairs I found a basement with grey couches filling the open space and a picture of the Harlequin Crew's symbol of a snarling skull wearing a harlequin’s hat painted onto the wall behind a large mahogany desk. All three of the guys had that fucking thing tattooed on their bodies and I hated looking into its dead eyes, feeling like it was mocking me with the fact that they chose it over me.
"What is this place?"
"This is where I do business with the members of my crew, when we’re not at The Oasis," Fox said and I scrunched my nose up as he mentioned the huge bar the Harlequins owned and used as their clubhouse. When we were kids we’d always avoided that place like the plague but I guessed now he was a fully fledged leader of that bunch of psychos he must have spent a lot of his time there.
"Well I'm not a member of your crew, so why the hell am I here?"
Fox moved around me, opening a wooden cabinet by the rear wall and pulling out a bottle of rum. There were no windows down here and I shifted uncomfortably as his gaze remained locked on me like I was the only thing in the world that he cared about. But he'd proved that that wasn't the case when he ruined my life ten years ago, so I wasn't buying it.
"You're here because this is where you belong. Because this is where you should have been for the last ten years and because I'm never going to make the mistake of letting you run from me ever again," he said in a low and deadly tone that didn't allow any room for argument and made me feel all hot and riled up.
"Fuck you, Fox. You have no idea where I've been or what I've been doing for the last ten years. You don't want me. You don't even know me. And if you've forgotten, you were the one who told me to fuck off and never come back."
Fox's upper lip curled back and he moved to take a seat on a big, leather chair as he took another long swig of his rum. "Come here."
"No."
"Don't test me tonight, Rogue. I'm not the kind of man who people say no to."
"And I guess that means you think I'm the kind of girl you can just boss around until I'm falling to my knees at your command? Well, sorry to burst your bubble, asshole, but that is not and never has been me. But I'm sure there are plenty of keen bitches up there for you to pick between, so how about you just leave me out of your plans and let me go? I'm getting really over this whole knight in shining armour role you seem to think you're playing at. I didn't ask you to lock me up in this house and I sure as hell didn't ask you to rescue me, so I have no intention of falling down and weeping in gratitude for any of it." I folded my arms and glared at him as he
pushed up out of his chair in a motion so sudden that I almost flinched.
"This isn't about me rescuing you, hummingbird," he growled as he stalked towards me and I refused to move so much as an inch. "And it's not about me looking for you to ride my cock in thanks for giving you a bed to sleep in and putting food in your belly. This is about you and me."
Fox came to a halt right in front of me and I raised my chin defiantly as I held my ground. The four inch heels put me closer to his height, but Fox Harlequin was a beast of a man and even with the extra inches, he towered over me by almost a full head.
"You and me have been written in the stars for a long fucking time, Rogue. I know you used to feel it too. We're inevitable. Always have been, always will be." He leaned in closer and cupped my face in his hand, making me look at him as my heart thrashed and I had to fight against the desire to scream at him that he was full of shit and I didn't have any intention to be his anything now or ever.
"You don't get to decide my life for me, Fox. Maybe around here you're used to having that kind of power over people, but not me. Never me."
I shoved away from him with my heart racing and he let me go, watching as I hurried up the stairs and back to the party.
"Well that didn't take long," Chase's voice caught my attention as I made it to the top of the stairs and I turned to look at him with a frown.
"What didn't?"
"I'm assuming you went down there to suck his dick just like Fox decided you would. No one can say no to the boss man after all. Am I right? I have to say that I'm impressed with how quickly you managed to get him off though. Maybe when he's bored with you, I can take you for a ride?"
"Fuck off, Chase. I'm not gonna suck your dick any more than I'll be sucking Fox's. He may have it in his head that I'm his but I'm not buying the bullshit he's selling. I never have and never will belong to anyone. I may have fuck all to my name and I might even be a dead girl walking, but the one thing I will always have is my own freedom. No man will take that from me. Not even the great Fox Harlequin."
"Is that so?" Chase asked, pushing off of the wall and closing in on me with much more interest in his eyes than he'd held before. "I wouldn't have minded being a fly on the wall for that little conversation. Did his head explode? Or did he just ignore your point of view on things entirely and assume you'd change your mind soon enough?"
"I didn't hang around to find out. Either way, I'm not his so I'll suck whatever dicks I want to. But don't go getting any ideas about that including yours, because I hate you too," I said, tilting my chin up to meet his gaze and stare at him in defiance.
Chase plucked his cigarette from the corner of his lips, stepped so close to me that we were practically pressed together aside from the thinnest slice of space dividing us and then exhaled to engulf me in a cloud of smoke. "Ditto."
He stepped around me without another word and I turned to scowl at his back as he headed down into the basement where Fox was presumably still raging out or pouting like a bitch.
Before I could look away from the stairway, another guy headed down there, then another. I moved aside as more and more people started heading down there and looked around in confusion, wondering if I'd somehow missed an announcement or something when JJ reappeared with a smile just for me.
"You survived the Fox then?" he teased, taking my hand and drawing me away from the basement door and back through to the kitchen.
"I'm not afraid of him," I scoffed, though that wasn't entirely true. The Harlequin boys frightened me because they were the only people I'd ever known who had tried to break me and succeeded. I wasn't afraid of any threats Fox might make to try and force me to get into line with his plans. I was more afraid of getting sucked back into their world and falling into their arms, only to be tossed aside when they got bored of me again.
"Good. You have to know he'd never hurt you. But he is a bit...intense when he wants something."
"I picked up on that," I muttered.
"All the more reason to keep your head down then. Fox is easy enough to please, just so long as you don't push back against his rules."
"Psh." I waved him off and he smirked as he leaned in close to speak in my ear.
"Or at least make sure you only do it in secret," he whispered, turning his head and pressing a kiss to my neck right beneath my ear that made my pulse skip and heat race across my skin.
JJ leaned back just as fast as he'd drawn close and winked at me.
"Now be a good girl and enjoy the party while we're talking downstairs," he advised. "Just stick to making friends with girls and Foxy won't have any reason to get pissy about it."
I ignored his suggestion and narrowed my eyes at the juicy worm he'd just offered me. "Why don't I just come downstairs with you?"
JJ shook his head and backed up a step, a clear refusal in his dark eyes. "No can do, sweetheart. Official Harlequin Crew shit. Members only - and you are definitely not sworn in."
"Well then why don't I swear in?" I offered, mostly because I wanted access to their secrets and I didn't actually care about keeping my word to any of them. So if I had to promise to be in their gang for life then I didn't mind breaking my word and running for the hills the moment I had what I wanted.
"That's not up to me," JJ said, his eyes twinkling with some dark humour. "And there’s no women allowed in the crew anyway. But if you wanna ask Fox to make an exception for you then be my guest."
I pursed my lips as I considered it. I'd just told Fox in no uncertain terms to get fucked. Was I really going to turn around and beg for a position in his crew? Then again, did I care about preserving my dignity when all I really wanted from this place was the contents of that crypt?
"Fine. I'll go ask him." I tossed my rainbow hair like a My Little Pony with an attitude problem and started towards the basement once again, but JJ caught my arm to stop me.
"He won't want to talk to you about that in front of all the other members. If you're determined to ask him then I'll get him to come up here." He took his phone from his back pocket and quickly shot Fox a message before I could object and I rolled my eyes at the dramatics involved with asking a simple question before grabbing another beer from the kitchen island and starting on it.
When Fox entered the room it was kind of like that part in Jurassic Park where the T-rex makes his appearance and every other fucker in the vicinity can't help but turn to look in terror. I was surprised my beer wasn’t rippling to mark his approach. He definitely had an aura about him that bred fear. Even if I hadn't known he was the leader of the Harlequin Crew, it would have been painfully obvious that he was someone to be afraid of.
He strode towards us with his black shirt half unbuttoned to reveal the beginnings of the artwork on his chest and the way the fabric strained across his broad shoulders forced me to look at him in all the wrong ways. But fuck that. Being pretty didn't excuse his bullshit.
"What is it?" he asked as he came to stand in front of me, looking down at me with narrowed eyes that said I was in the doghouse. Dickhead.
"I wanna sign up to your little crew," I demanded. "I don't like secrets and I figure the only way you're going to let me in on what you have going on here is by signing up."
"No," Fox said simply and for some pathetic, unmentionable reason, that reaction actually stung.
"Why not?" I growled.
"Firstly, because there’s no women in the Harlequins, it’s in the code. Secondly, because I don't want you running jobs with us and putting yourself in danger. And thirdly, because you're still lying to us about a lot of things. Either way, you're perfectly safe here in the house and you have no need to earn any money, so I don't see any reason to initiate you even if I did decide to bend the code for you."
"Maybe I don't want to live off of your charity," I growled.
"Tough." He folded his arms and gave me a flat look that said I was trying his patience even though his eyes burned with the kind of hunger that said he wanted to eat me up.
JJ
stood watching this entire exchange like it was a reality tv show he was engrossed in and clearly had no desire to leave us to it.
"I want to be able to come and go from this place as I like," I pushed. "If I'm a member you'll know you can trust me and-"
"No."
"But if you-"
"If you want to be able to come and go, then you should give my offer more consideration," Fox said in a low voice, taking a step closer to me so that I was distracted by the pure, hard wall of muscle standing before me. "If you're my girl then you'll be safe wherever you go. No one will dare touch you. You could leave the house as and when you please and take the time to remember exactly why you fit here so perfectly. This is where you're meant to be, Rogue. Always has been. There’s a space for you at my side that you've been waiting to step into since we were just a bunch of dumb kids running the streets. Just stop fighting it and you can have whatever you want."
"No," I growled, moving closer to him myself as I refused to be intimidated by him. "I'm not some whore you can command into your bed and I won't let you blackmail me into it either. You don't even know me anymore, Fox. So stop basing your fantasy on the version of me you think you remember and take your head out of your fucking ass. I'm not your girl. I'm not anyone's girl."
"Fine," he replied with a shrug. "But until you realise that you're wrong about that, I think it's best you stay here where we can keep an eye on you."
Fox turned and stalked away from me, leaving me feeling like he'd just sucked all of the air from the room as he went. He barked an order at JJ to follow him and he tossed me a smirk before turning and following his boss back to the basement like a good little grunt.
I waited for them to head through the door and downstairs, taking note of the two big dudes who moved to stand before the door and block the way down there once Fox and JJ were inside. They were both carrying guns which they'd jammed into the backs of their jeans and the dark expressions on their faces said they meant business. There was no way I'd be snooping in on that little boys’ club meeting.
Sinners' Playground Page 16
