by Tanja Neise
Olivia seemed thoughtful; she didn't speak, but nibbled on her thumbnail instead. Anyone could have seen how upset she was. Unfortunately, even after more than seven hundred years on this planet, women were still a mystery to me. When did they want to be comforted, when were they to be left alone? Should I hold Liv in my arms? I left it at that, to give her the time to think. Finally, she raised her head and I asked a very important question.
“Tell me, do you possibly have strengths that aren’t normal for a young woman your age?”
“No... Well, I don't get sick very often, actually, not at all.” She reflected, briefly, as if she was struggling with the decision of whether she should really tell me the next thing. “And I sense danger. That's why I fled the apartment earlier. And I don't need much sleep. That's all I can think of.” Insecurity, which seemed to penetrate from each of her pores, caused her to lower her gaze. Was she ashamed of herself?
“Well, that's worth a lot,” I said emphatically, but she didn't raise her head. Only then did I notice that she was crying. Individual tears dripped onto the trousers she was wearing. “Hey, come here, Livvy,” I said, quietly, and pulled her into my arms. I held her while she silently shed a few tears. Again, I felt overwhelmed. Except for the time I’d spent with Fria, I couldn’t draw on a wealth of experience of real relationships. When I felt like having sex, it wasn't hard to find a human woman or vampire who wanted it as much as I did. Comforting someone had never been on the agenda. Fria had been a woman who showed feelings very cautiously – which she also did very rarely. Then the vampire wars had come upon us and my world had changed abruptly, like that of everyone, human or vampire.
Olivia sniffed again before she took a deep breath and confessed: “Over the last fourteen years I have asked myself again and again what happened in my life before I was ten. But I’ve never found out, never found out how I lived or who else belonged to my family. I only had Mum and Dad.” She stopped briefly and then continued: “And when I found out that the Morgans weren't my parents, I always wondered why my birth family had never looked for me. I felt inferior and thought it was because I wasn’t normal. Because I was different and often scared and suffered from nightmares.”
My breath faltered in the face of the tragedy that had happened in Liv's life. I couldn't even begin to understand how confused the little child's soul must’ve been after the girl from back then had woken up in that barn. I hadn’t been there to help her. And in some crazy way I felt guilty that Liv hadn't known where she came from until today. Because, I was now certain that Olivia Morgan’s real name was actually Margaret Rumsfield.
Finally, she looked me in the eyes again. “I... I... So, I’m like this because my biological father – this Rumsfield – carried out experiments on me. That’s perverse! How can you do something so terrible to your own child?” The horror was written in her face and slight hysteria resonated in her words.
“Oh no, Liv. I think now you're doing him an injustice. He may have wished to make you an even more valuable person than you already were. He loved you very much,” I was trying to explain something to her that wasn’t quite clear to me myself. Why was I protecting a man I had suffered so much from for so many years?
“Aha! And how would you know that?”
“I must’ve spent twenty-five years on Sir Rumsfield's estate as a research object. He carried out experiments on me that would probably have killed a man. But over the course of the many years he also saw me as somebody to talk to from time to time, especially after all his assistants had become vampires who couldn’t control themselves. He told me a lot about his work.” I deliberately took a little break, because I remembered, and the emotions these memories evoked in me made my voice tremble. Liv had noticed the change in me and, quite naturally, put her slim hand on my forearm. This was slowly becoming a habit, but it was certainly not something I disparaged. “He was very convinced of what he was doing. And he was accordingly convincing. He convinced his assistants, one by one, to make themselves available for his purposes. He hadn't started with his daughter initially, but rather, with people who worked with him, first of all. Only then, apparently, did he test the developed serum on his daughter, that is, on you.”
She looked at me as if she was far away. A gasp escaped from her mouth. “Terry.”
At first I didn't understand what she was trying to tell me by that name, but then I remembered that the oldest of the assistants in Rumsfield's lab was called Terry. “Yes, you're right. One of the men who worked in the lab was Terry.”
It was quiet in my study; you could have heard a pin drop. She looked at me with wide eyes as I held my breath, as I realised something very important was happening. “He always brought me a lollipop on Mondays. Secretly, since I wasn't allowed to eat sugar.”
Olivia remembered!
Olivia Morgan / Margaret Rumsfield
It was as if a tsunami was rolling right over me. A tsunami full of pictures, memories and feelings that I’d experienced. A terrible headache shot through my temples and tears ran out of my eyes as I finally realised who I was. I pressed my fingers against my head, but even this touch did not alleviate the pain in any way.
Then I saw the images from my vision – Robert running from something – but this time I saw even more. I could see a little redheaded girl in his arms. And the next moment I realised that I had been that girl. I felt secure; I felt that I was safe in those arms. In disbelief, I looked directly at Robert. “You saved my life.”
He immediately knew what I was talking about and nodded. “Yes, but I didn't know until just now that you were that sweet little girl.” A crooked smile formed on his face and I carefully put my forehead against his.
“I heard you in my head.” I whispered, as I was aware of the absurdity of my words.
Robert didn’t understand what I meant. I could see the question in his eyes when he leaned back a little.
“In the lab, I heard you in my head. It was as if you’d yelled at me. And I heard you in the car, too, when we were driving to Centrodynamics. The words were in my head.”
“What words?” he exhaled, breathlessly, and every muscle in his body was tense.
I had to smile. “Well, after you told me that you wanted to continue where we had left off before, I heard: Then I will slowly undress you. Those were the words. Or something like that.”
Visibly shaken, he brushed his hand first over his face and then ruffled his hair. “That’s...”
“Yes, I know that's impossible.” I realised how stupid it had been to even tell him about it. Nobody believed anything like that. Not even a vampire.
Shaking his head, he replied: “No, it’s not that at all, my love. You should know that when two vampires are connected, such telepathic communication can be possible. Not always – only in very rare cases. Actually, only if two vampires, who were also born as such, are connected with each other. This happens through the exchange of blood while they’re having sex. This ritual is rare now. Of us born as vampires, there are no more than fifty. I am inclined to doubt that you’re a vampire. You understand why I reacted so incredulously, don’t you?”
I nodded and thought about what he had told me. Sex, the word alone made my pulse shoot up and the memory come alive in my mind's eye. But I stopped myself and directed my thoughts to the other information I now had to process. What had my biological father done with my DNA and his? This outside influence went totally against my grain. I felt like a puppet. Although he’d been dead for a long time, Robert and I were dancing on invisible threads, dancing the dance he had planned for us. He’d chosen Robert to be with me. He had, in some kind of perverse way, intercepted him from having sex with other women and had given me DNA that condemned me to being compatible with only one particular vampire. And I thought I had a mental problem because I had to keep biting the guys who kissed me. And now we were sitting here opposite each other, in love, just because Sir Rumsfield wanted us to be. We probably wouldn't even have liked each othe
r otherwise.
“Yes, yes, I understand that very well. We don't really belong together at all.” Angry at myself for not having been able to defend myself against it, and angry at my biological producer, I stood up and took a deep breath. “We don't have to support this insanity by playing this perfidious game. We are conscious beings and can consciously decide against a relationship.”
Slowly and deliberately, Robert rose. From pinched eyelids, he looked at me. He looked like the predator that he was. My neck hair stood on end and my heart began to beat at a furious pace.
“Olivia Morgan or, for all I care, Margaret Rumsfield, don't you dare leave me before this has even begun.” It was almost as if the air around him was beginning to whirr. He radiated an enormous rage that made my knees tremble.
“That’s what I was intending to do.” My voice trembled, but not only from the fear that had spread within me.
His hands closed around my shoulders and he pulled me roughly to his chest. “You belong to me,” Robert growled. In my stomach, butterflies rose from a deep sleep and fluttered around, happily. “I don't care who or what is responsible for us being connected. It could be the devil himself who’s behind it. Nobody will be able to break us apart, not even you.”
My eyelids fluttered excitedly as his mouth approached my face. I held my breath and then my body did what it felt was right. My mind was simply switched off. I pressed myself firmly against him and my hands wandered into his hair by themselves. I clung to it as his lips divided mine and his tongue conquered me. Passionately, his hands wandered down my body, sliding under my shirt. Robert's thumb gently swept along the edge of my bra before his hand closed around one of my breasts. I wanted to feel him in the same way, and drove both my hands down his torso, grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it off. My mouth explored his hot skin as he tossed his head back into the nape of his neck, moaning. Seeing him so excited and vulnerable in front of me was beguiling. He tasted of something forbidden – something I’d been desperately searching for and had finally found. My knees turned weak and I began to tremble with desire. Immediately, Robert pulled me back up towards him and explored my bosom again. The tip of his thumb found my nipple through the thin fabric of my bra and gently stroked it. I couldn't help but let out a deep moan. It came from deep inside me and I wanted more. Much more. But my subconscious was still too aware of the presence of the many people in this loft.
Robert noticed that I was hesitating and let his hands wander slowly to my back without interrupting the skin contact. Like a purring cat, I snuggled even closer to him. Slowly our lips separated and I breathlessly put my head to his fast beating heart.
I love you and that won’t change. Ever again.
Frightened, I gasped for air, tore my head up, and looked Robert directly in the eyes. His gaze confirmed what I had just heard in my head. Tears veiled my vision and I quickly closed my eyes.
Robert Tensington
Never in my extremely long-lasting life had I spoken or even thought these words. Back in the fourteenth century, Fria and I had come quite close to love, but it had never been such a whirlwind, never had such a strong pull as the one I had felt since I met Liv. Until now, I’d always thought that at the beginning of my life I’d loved my strong, human wife, but it had been a very efficient companionship, as I now realised. This was more – much more.
It was an exhilarating feeling to know that this special connection existed between us. When she had looked at me like that, stunned, and I was now absolutely sure that she could perceive my thoughts, I just had to pull her to me. My heart was thumping wildly against my ribs, and a triumphant smile flashed across my face. This wonderful woman belonged to me. I would’ve loved to shout it out loud to the world. Why had we only constantly been in trouble ever since we met? This obviously complicated things. Nevertheless, deep happiness flooded my veins.
“Does it work the other way around?” Liv asked, meekly. Of course, I’d noticed that she hadn't assured me that she loved me. She didn't have to. I felt it. I felt it through our connection. It was still a very weak bond, but now, with her fresh blood in my circulation, I could feel it, even if she didn't know it herself or wasn’t aware of her feelings. I trusted that time would bring us closer and closer together. However, I still had so many unanswered questions about this connection; unfortunately, the only one who could have answered them was dead.
“I think it could work. But for that we should revive our bond,” I told her, willingly.
Now I had aroused her curiosity. I could see it clearly in her eyes, which made me grin. “And that happens how?”
“Sex, blood and love,” I was reducing one of the holiest rituals of my species. For the time being, I didn't want to go any further, because everything was still so fresh for her, so far away from what she’d experienced thus far. It would rather deter than encourage her to consciously enter into this union with me. I wished for it most eagerly, but I didn’t want to rush it.
As I had expected, she gasped for air in shock. “That’s... Oh, forget it.” She was reacting completely normally – humanly – to this information. But in the course of time the legacy of my blood, which had been in her circulation for so long, would demand its destiny. At some point we would seal the bond and from then on we would be irreversibly bound to each other. The ritual would be a step up from what Sir Rumsfield had done so many years ago. Goose pimples covered my forearm at the thought. I wanted it more than I’d ever wanted anything before in my life.
“If you ever want to know more, I'll explain it to you. But here and now isn’t the time for something of such power.” I tenderly stroked her cheek and she nestled trustingly into my hand. Oh yes, we would find a way to be together. I felt the connection and I very strongly believed in it.
Anne Rumsfield
In order not to do something I would later regret, I’d quickly moved to stand beside the locked windows – far away from this bloodsucker, who apparently wanted to get into my pants. And my traitorous body didn't seem to be averse to it. What bullshit! What had I got into here? Anyhow, although a few metres separated me from him, my heart was beating in a wild gallop.
When I turned around, Dark was dropping down into the armchair. Like the womaniser I saw him as, he leaned back and put one arm on the back of the chair. A light smile lay on his lips which were screaming to be kissed. Oh man, what was I thinking? Had all the good spirits abandoned me? Angrily, I furrowed my brow. Pull yourself together, Anne Rumsfield!
He was perfectly aware of his effect on me. His gaze seemed to burn me, but even if I’d wanted to, I couldn’t turn my eyes away from him. So we remained, sinking deep into each other’s eyes.
When I was almost about to take a step in his direction, one of the doors to the adjacent rooms opened, and Tensington stepped into the living room, closely followed by the woman I had initially mistaken for my sister here in this loft. Previously, at the Centrodynamics building, I’d only seen her from a distance; I hadn't been as focused as I was now.
Everything about her cried out that she was a daughter of Lady Sarah Rumsfield. And my heart wanted it to be the truth – it wanted it so badly that the sight of her alone caused a violent tug within me.
Olivia came up to me, and in her look, I recognised something that made my neck hair stand on end. She seemed so open, so hopeful. “Anne,” she breathed my name, and I knew it. I could feel it. My twin sister was standing in front of me and she could quite obviously remember. She had recognised me and my hunch had not betrayed me. Was it perhaps because we were twins? Did those old myths hold true?
“Maggie?” I deliberately used the nickname I’d given her as a child. Whenever I’d been allowed to see Margaret, we’d been bosom buddies. We’d even secretly slept in one bed. As soon as I was back in London, I wrote to her, but later I had to learn that my nanny had never believed the stories about my sister. She had dismissed it as the fantasy of a lonely child and never sent the letters. Instead, she’d destroyed tho
se written lines. No one had ever heard of me having a twin. I wasn’t allowed to use the phone. All I had left were the far too rare visits to the estate.
I still believe today that my father never really loved me. He had pushed me away as easily as one might an unloved stepmother. From time to time, I was allowed to come for a visit, but basically, he wouldn’t have minded doing without my presence. This caused me great anguish and had profoundly hurt me in the depths of my soul. I was also not sure whether his feelings towards my twin sister had been more intimate. Perhaps he had simply never been able to build a deep bond with us because his beloved wife had died during our birth. But these were all assumptions that I would never have confirmed.
An embarrassed smile flitted across Olivia’s, or Margaret’s, face. “Yes, Sweetheart.” And at that moment the walls I had built around my heart shattered. First, small cracks ran along its edge, then everything collapsed like a house of cards, and I ran towards my sister, sniffling. We fell into each other's arms, held each other and cried together. Sweetheart had been her nickname for me before. This gave me absolute affirmation that I had found Margaret.
Then we talked for an eternity, and told each other about what had happened to us in the meantime. The two men stayed in the background, sat apart, but they stayed in the room and kept an eye on me. I could well understand that. In their place, I, too, would’ve remained very sceptical of me; after all, I had tried several times to do something to one of theirs.
“Why are you with these bloodsuckers?” I whispered, quietly, but so that Maggie could still understand me. Nevertheless, I wasn't sure the vampires couldn’t hear me anyway. Their hearing was clearly better trained than ours.
