"You might as well desist, Zady. Mouvar's hero and his helper have you pinned. Keep up the farce and one of the little boys will eventually think to bring a knife and cut your head off. Twenty years, Zady, and you haven't learned a thing!"
Kelvin forced the ugly bird's head back on its scrawny neck. The bird's eyes rolled back. Its tongue protruded. It squawked. The CRACK sounded loud through the crystal.
The bird's head drooped back; to all appearances it was dead.
"Just think of what he could have done if he'd worn his gauntlets! They would never be fooled into thinking that supple bird's neck could break. But don't worry, Zady, I don't think he's smart enough. He's letting go, the fool! He's trying to get up but the boots are resisting him. Get out of this yourself—I've interfered enough."
Zady became Zady, made a superhuman effort, pulled free, and leaped up. Kelvin made a grab for her and the girl swung her strap at her, but again she was the bird. She snapped her ugly beak, shot into the air, and flapped her wings.
Before Kelvin and the girl could fully react she was circling them. She dropped a dropping in Kelvin's face, mockingly fluffed her rump at them, and started to fly away.
That was a mistake. The girl moved like lightning. The rock hurled from the sling caught Zady's avian rump and sent feathers flying. The creature plummeted from the sky, then splashed.
The bird disappeared. Zady's ugly human head appeared on the surface and her arm raised a fist and shook it at the shore. As they watched she vanished from the water. She did not reappear.
"Zady, with that clumsy performance you've set magic back at least a thousand years! I know you'll be back here begging me to help you more. What a pitiful excuse for a playing piece! I don't know whether Mouvar or I picked worse!!"
Zady was back in Professor Devale's office at the university in record time. She'd flown directly to the ruins of the former Rud palace, along the underground river to the correct spot, and had dived, still in bird form. Standing dripping naked in his study she was all ruffled feathers, though now in her human form.
"Professor Devale, you just have to—"
"You're incompetent. In fact you're a disgrace!" Attack was best with her kind.
"I was trying to corrupt them. I was doing fine until that niece interfered."
"You didn't take precautions. If you were going to seduce the lout you should have taken him to an isolated mountain. And how stupid to let him wear the boots. Wasn't one defeat by boots enough?"
"I didn't know he had them! I thought he'd flown."
"Flown? Like a bird? You think he's a warlock?"
"I... forgot. I'm so accustomed to changing to bird form myself that I forgot he couldn't. Besides, he could have ridden a horse or walked. He could have had his flying belt. Or for that matter, a boat."
"It's a pity you weren't smart enough to find out."
"Why? Once I had the attraction magic going full strength I knew he'd get there. I could have waited for days."
"But you didn't. That should have suggested something to you. Haven't you crystals and powers that work?"
"Mine work. I just don't use them."
"Why not?"
The rheumy eyes looked at his carpet, the red spots draining from her sagging cheeks.
"I say you were stupid and incompetent. The lowliest apprentice could have handled a seduction."
"After his niece interfered I thought it would be fun to corrupt his entire family. I wanted to get to him through them and make him think he's an ally."
"You really thought it could work?"
"I thought it would be fun."
"It wasn't, was it?"
"It could have been."
Devale shook his head negatively and raised his right hand to polish his right shiny horn. "Zady, Zady, Zady," he lectured, "you are such a disappointment to me. You had every opportunity to use your magic training and your brain, but instead you let emotion take control of you."
"How's that?"
"Don't be coy and dumb at the same time." Exasperated, Professor Devale snapped a finger and sent a fine pink powder expanding into a cloud. In the heart of the cloud Kathy Jon Crumb was facing the seductress and her uncle. Kelvin had just suggested that Zady had changed. In reply the girl berated him.
"You've changed, Uncle. You're under the same spell that Zoanna cast on Grandpa. You're being just as big a fool now as he was back then."
"Don't," Zady said, making it a hiss, "take Zoanna's name in vain! She was the rightful ruler of Rud before this upstart—"
The professor snapped his fingers again and made the cloud vanish from his study. Left were only a few wisps of pinkish smoke that rapidly disappeared.
"Now wasn't that smart. You, a witch of centuries of experience, supposedly the strongest witch around, and you let this mere girl-child trick you. Oh, she didn't know she was tricking you, but you should have known. You probably said the one thing that would enable Mouvar's hero to break an attraction spell. How did you think he'd react after you mentioned Zoanna and his father and called her the rightful ruler of Rud? Then, as if that wasn't enough, you called him an upstart. That was dumb of you."
"He was an upstart!"
"Of course, but that hardly suggests that you have changed. You were right at the point of berating him for everything he had done, and you would have if he hadn't broken the spell. How do you explain that?"
"Helbah gave him some protective conditioning."
"And you never thought of that, did you?"
The beautiful body hung its ugly head. Slowly a tear leaked out the right rheumy eye, acknowledging his accuracy.
"I wanted so badly to corrupt them," she sniffed. "The children are young enough to be turned bad. I could have recruited them, gotten Kelvin to turn against his children, to leave his wife. Maybe I could have had him kill Helbah for me; possibly even Mouvar."
"Now on that last you're dreaming. I'm not saying it wouldn't be pleasing to me if it were possible. But Mouvar and I are harder to kill than mere witches and warlocks. There's a way, but not for you to know and not to be used by Kelvin."
"He could work against him, at least."
"Oh yes, if you had properly seduced and corrupted him. Witches aren't supposed to lose their faculties and grow senile, but I fear that you have. Therefore I think I'll get a replacement for you from among my brightest students. As for you, I'll just wave you out of existence, and—"
"No, no, no!" Zady was plainly scared now. "I'll do your bidding. I always have done your bidding and I'll do it now. Give me a chance to serve you and I swear I will not fail!"
"Why should I?"
She indicated her body, nude and glistening. Her smile suggested things that only she would think to offer.
"That's getting a little thin, you know."
Her body immediately became buxom, with valleys and depths that hadn't been there. Her gesture indicated what she had done and invited him to explore.
"I didn't mean your body needed upholstering. That slender niece of his is just as appealing, partly because she doesn't know it." Though it was sort of interesting the way Zady's breasts had become near-udders and her lower parts grosser and more tantalizingly haired. Firm and smooth was arousing, but fuller and grosser was inflaming to his senses. Still, he had to be stern with her or she'd assume that he was no more than a warlock with oversized glands.
She gave him a look. It suggested that he would be foolish to deprive himself, as very possibly he would.
"All right, I'll give you another chance. But you'd better not come whining to me again. This time I want results!"
Instantly her warm pillowy arms were about him, her eager body smothering his in flesh. Her superior weight bore him down, and he let her, only signing as they dropped, converting the desk with its books and papers into a soft, open bed.
Zady might not be a whiz in modern necromancy, but in the more ancient magic she was superb!
Kelvin rowed the boat. His niece watched him from her
seat in the bow. His nephews lay like three veterans of dissipation nursing man-sized hangovers.
"I could kill her for what she did to them!" he swore.
"You will someday."
"Yes, if Helbah's right I suppose I'll have to."
"They're not really hurt, are they? I mean they're just sleeping." She indicated the three bodies in the bottom of the boat.
"Helbah will know if they've been poisoned with some foul substance. I think it's just the wine."
"She seemed so nice, they said. I really think she was trying to make them like her."
"Yes, the way she tried with Merlain and Charles when they were kids. She almost succeeded with them, too, and would have if it hadn't been for Helbah."
"I know the entire story, Uncle Kelvin. You've told it so many times."
"Yes, yes, I know I have. I've been living in the past. I have to get over that."
"Living in the past?" Kathy seemed puzzled.
"Sort of thing my father says. He's never forgotten Earth expressions and I've adopted most of them."
"Like 'hell' and 'damn,' as St. Helens says."
"A little like that, only those are swear words."
"Oh. You know this Yokes who has the new boat rentals?"
"I think I knew his grandpa. The old man got us boats whenever we went to use the transporter; he helped Jon once."
"I know," Kathy said in a weary way. "Mom is going to be surprised at how early we've come home."
"Will she? I thought she knew your brothers."
Kathy smiled. "Maybe we should give them wine to drink more often. I never saw them so good."
At her words, seemingly propelled by them, Alvin sat up, hung his head over the gunnel, and heaved up all he had eaten and drunk. He made disgusting vomiting sounds.
"That's why not," Kelvin said, nodding. "One of the reasons."
"Ohhh, I'll never trust a witch again!"
"Tough, Alvin, but you'll have to trust one witch: Helbah."
"Helbah never gave me wine."
"And she won't. Nor will I or your mother or sister."
"Dad might," Teddy said, not stirring from the floorboards.
"He won't either," his sister said.
"Why? I'm not sick," Teddy bragged.
"You will be when you get home."
Kelvin looked down at Joey, sleeping like the proverbial lamb in his father's expressions, then maneuvered the boat into the pier. The young man with the boathook didn't look a thing like the Yokes Kelvin remembered, but the old man had been old when Jon first met him, and this was the old man's grandson.
"Why, you're the Roundear!"
"These are my sister's children."
"And you spent the day with them! You really are a hero!"
Kelvin found himself whispering "Drop dead" under his breath, another of his father's Earth expressions. He helped his niece clear out the boat, putting first the tackle and then the boys on the dock. He helped her up, got up himself, and felt, despite his new streamlined form, weary as he had seldom been.
"You anxious to get home, Kathy?"
"Yes!"
"So am I. Suppose I carry you and the boys to your place and then I step home to mine?"
"You mean—"
"Of course."
He picked up Joey, thought of the Crumb cottage and where he wanted to step there, and stepped. The fields and the roads blurred by. Joey, who was now very wild-eyed, voiced his astonishment as Kelvin put him down. Kelvin waved at his sister coming out the door, stepped back, got suddenly miserable young Teddy, stepped back, and got Alvin, who seemed less miserable now that he had been properly sick. He made another two trips with fishing tackle. For his final trip he picked up Kathy Jon, hugging her to him like a daughter. But she was not his daughter, and she was no longer any child, as he had become aware recently. She was a good and lovely young woman. She had saved his unworthy and most unheroic hide this day, and he could never repay her, badly as he wanted to. He took the step, and was beside his sister's house for the last time. Now Jon was inside, getting her sons in order.
"Thank you so much, Uncle," Kathy breathed, and kissed him on his cheek.
"Don't do that!" he exclaimed, embarrassed.
"I'm only play-acting," she said, hurt.
Should he explain? No, she would catch on soon enough on her own, if she hadn't already. Then he thought of something else. "Kathy, were you at my house, in my room this morning? With the stuffed fish?"
Her mouth dropped open. "I dreamed I was, Uncle! How did you know?"
She had dreamed it, but had not done it. So that, too, was the mischief of the witch. "I dreamed it too," he said.
Then his sister appeared. Kelvin fended off Jon's invitation to come inside, and stepped home.
Heln was there at the door before he could open it. Before she could speak, he did. "Heln, whatever I did last night, I'm sorry. I beg you to forgive me. I'm sure I was an awful fool."
Her eyes widened. "You really don't remember!"
"I really don't. But I've been under an evil enchant—"
"It's all right, Kelvin. I've had time to cool down. I must admit it was sort of funny when she sailed up in the air like that, screeching."
"Who?"
"Danceye Nellie. She had been putting her flesh under your nose all evening, in the guise of serving others. Then when she bent over in front of you, her rump almost in your face, and you goosed her—"
He was appalled. "I did that?"
"You must have. Because she almost leaped over the table. Served her right. After that she behaved with more decorum."
"So you're not—"
"Not anymore. Just don't do it again."
"I won't!"
She frowned. "Not unless—"
Oops. Had he done something else? He didn't dare ask. "I—"
"Unless she pokes her rump in your face again."
He stared at her. Then she started to laugh.
Relieved, he grabbed her around her full, middle-aged waist and hugged her for all the little he felt he was worth.
"Heln, Heln, Heln, I had the most terrible experience today of my life. But now it's over with. Now I'm right."
"You were wrong before?" she asked, clearly puzzled by this.
"Heln, you will never, never know how wrong I was."
Nor would he be, he vowed, the one to tell her. Helbah might know, Kathy Jon certainly did, but he hoped that neither had fully seen the lust in him that he now so thoroughly wanted to forget.
CHAPTER 13
Preparations for War:
Zady's
The young fellow with the mincing gait didn't look like any king or prince the commander had ever seen. As the slicked-down dandy with his purple pantaloons and nattily sequined shirt flounced up to the door of Recruitment House, every old and young veteran was at the windows, staring at him.
"Commander Roarer," the young recruit with the new sword scar across his right cheek whispered, "that can't be from Rotternik."
"Not from Rotternik," the commander said. His left arm, missing except for its stump, was throbbing painfully. That was always a bad sign. "I don't know where it can be from."
"As long as it has gold," the recruit whispered.
The commander shook his head. Though they were all mercenaries, there were some things even more important than gold. "Possibly a tourist."
"But from where?"
"Another frame, maybe. Let's hope it goes back there."
Everyone moved away from the windows as the door opened. The stranger stepped inside, doffed the fancy tall hat sporting an eagawk's plume, and bowed from the waist. His hair was a rusty color, a shade redder than well-dried blood. His eyes, when raised, were of a yellow color belonging in the face of an unreasonably maddened feline. Clearly not the usual visitor to Recruitment House.
"Commander Roarer, let me introduce myself," the apparent fop offered. "I'm Master Jade and I represent a power. I'm in need of an army. I'm prepared to pay well an
d offer a bonus in conquered territories to everyone who fights."
"To whose victory?"
"That has to remain a secret, Commander."
"Not if you want to hire mercenaries. We have to know that you can pay and the chances of your success."
"I assure you, Commander, that victory will be ours. As for the ability to pay—"
The dandy held out an open hand and on it appeared a gold coin. The likeness on the coin was of Zoanna, a former queen of Rud overthrown by the Roundear. The hand closed and reopened, and the coin was two identical bright and shining coins. Three times the hand opened and closed and on the third opening the hand had become impossibly filled with Zoanna's shining images.
Men from around the room gathered round them, looking greedily at the coins. The dandy turned his hand over and the coins fell to the hard wooden floor, clinking. They continued falling, continued clinking for an unnaturally long time. Men grabbed the coins as they fell, picked them up, put them on tables and unobtrusively into pockets. Still the coins rained.
"I believe, Master Jade, you have made your point." The stump burned now like fire.
"I thought I would. Can I have my army assembled and ready to ride in three days?"
"Three days? Impossible."
"Nothing is impossible, Commander. Consider for instance these coins, which can become valueless unless earned." A slim hand turned over and made a pass as the gold coins stopped falling. As the pass was completed the coins took on a dull appearance and each, whether in pocket or hand or on table, collapsed into a pile of sand. The warriors, seasoned and unseasoned alike, stared with opened mouths and rounded eyes at what had seemed a fortune.
"Very, very impressive magic," acknowledged the commander. "Magic can help with a war but seldom win total victory."
"Right, Commander. My side needs troops."
"You haven't declared war yet?"
"A simple precaution."
Mouvar's Magic Page 14
