Table of Contents
Title page
Copyright page
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
About the Author
Also from Dirt Road Books
Big Girl Pill
KD Williamson
www.dirtroadbooks.com
Copyright © 2019, KD Williamson
Dirt Road Books, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including recording, printouts, information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to persons living or dead or to business establishments or events is coincidental.
Cover design by Jove Belle
Cover photo © merzavka
ISBN : 978-1-947253-36-0
Dedication
To my wife, Michelle. You inspire me. You put up with me. You make me a better asshole. Love you.
Acknowledgments
Thanks to Amy and Anne for kicking my ass, taking names, and keeping it real.
Chapter 1
Maya got her backpack out of her car and made sure her water bottle was in it before she slung it over her shoulder and grabbed her clipboard from the front passenger seat. Some people hated running team-building exercises, but she enjoyed it and, in this case, it kept her thoughts away from Asheville, North Carolina, and her former best friend’s impending wedding.
It was bad enough that she had agreed to go and watch Nina get hitched, but it was a whole other level of shitty hell that she had agreed to be a bridesmaid. Stupid, being infatuated with Nina even after all this time, but if being a part of the wedding didn’t kill whatever leftover feelings she had, she didn’t know what would. She locked up, then made her way to the makeshift fake Sumo wrestling ring set up for the team-building exercise with TrendStar Tennessee employees. When she got there, she lifted the flap and bent over to test the stakes in the ground, ensuring they were firm and deep. With a flourish, she put a check mark and initialed the paper on her clipboard. Done.
She stood and shrugged her backpack off to get her water bottle. As she drank, Maya looked toward the group of upper, mid-management, and support staff, then up at the sky. Clear and sunny, but nowhere near blistering hot. She could have made this an indoor activity, but most of the TrendStar folks were pasty and soft, thanks no doubt to constantly pushing paper. They needed the sun and this outing, even if they were still on company grounds, barely a few hundred yards away from the main building.
The three interns that Connexion, Maya’s employer, had provided were busy helping their clients into their inflatable suits, helmets, and other gear. Those in completed costumes waddled around like ducks and, to make matters even more interesting, the material made weird creaking noises when they walked. If someone were secretly recording them, the whole ordeal would probably go viral. Hopefully, they’d capture her good side. Maya noticed one of the executives jogging toward her.
“Can I help with anythin’, Ms. Davis? It is Miss, isn’t it? Or would you rather Maya? Should always ask a woman what she prefers.” He smiled brightly and his gaze dipped from her eyes down to her chest. She glanced at his nametag. David. Bald, tall, and lean—a cross between Idris Elba and LL Cool J. He oozed the kind of charm that was just the other side of slimy, like a crooked used car salesman. Some women probably flocked to him, but she wasn’t into that sort of thing.
She sighed internally. What the hell was it with some guys? She really needed a personal narrator in times like these to voice her inner thoughts so she didn’t have to waste time on them. Maybe she’d go with Morgan Freeman for that, but even if she let this guy down easy, citing professional boundaries, he’d still take offense and tank her rating. The male ego was fragile as fuck. What would Morgan have to say about that?
He cleared his throat and increased the wattage on his smile, showing way too many teeth. “Can I help?” he asked louder.
Not for the first time, she wished she had some kind of lesbian superpowers that projected pheromones to attract women and repel men. Unfortunately, the English language would have to do. “No thanks. I think we’re good. Connexion takes care of all the contingencies.”
“That’s good. I have to tell you that I expected some muscle-bound drill sergeant to be runnin’ the activity. How’d you get into this type of work?”
Small talk. He wanted to do small talk. Might as well make it all look good, since it could help in the long run. “Warren Wilson actually offers a Bachelor’s degree in team facilitation.”
His eyes widened and twinkled. “Really?”
“Really. You can get a degree in just about anything these days.” Maya couldn’t help adding a dose of sarcasm to her voice.
David’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh, I didn’t mean it like that. I was just wonderin’ what made you pick it as a major. I hope I’m not gettin’ too personal.”
Maya shrugged. “I sort of fell into it. I was a business major, but that didn’t work out.” More like she was bored to tears and could barely stay awake in class.
“Yeah, those classes are definitely not for everyone. I mean no disrespect. My first Econ class put me to sleep.”
“No offense taken. Was there anything else?” she asked, trying to shut the conversation down.
He chuckled nervously. “Since I can’t help you, maybe you can help me? I’ve never done this before.” David leaned toward her, reached out, and touched her elbow.
Stepping away, Maya tried really hard not to roll her eyes. He’d obviously mistaken her kindness for interest. Yeah, those superpowers would have been perfect. “I get it. Not many people go around wearing inflatable suits.”
“Exactly.” David fired up his smile again.
“But I have every confidence that you can manage while I finish my safety check.”
“You ever been to Jackson before? I could show you around later. Memphis is usually the big deal around here, but we got something special—”
“I’m a lesbian.” There. Maya didn’t want him to hurt himself with all those teeth. She almost smiled imagining Freeman saying those exact words in his velvety smooth voice that inspired confidence and trust. Unlike Freeman, Maya sounded like she’d hurled a social grenade at him. She braced for impact.
Slack-jawed, David stared at her. Despite his dark skin, Maya swore he blushed. Clearing his throat, he looked everywhere except at Maya. He rubbed a hand over his face and chuckled. “This has been happening to me way too much lately, especially since Jackson isn’t even half the size of Memphis.”
His response was a surprise and actually a bit refreshing. Maya moved him up a few steps from grimy to slightly douchey.
“We’re everywhere.” She grinned.
Shaking his head, David laughed outright. “Apparently. Ah, I’m sorry if I came on too strong. All I saw in front of me was a beautiful black woman, so I had to take the chance.”
She nodded and decided he was actually nice. It wouldn’t hurt to give a little more, especially if her demeanor helped boost his revie
w. “Okay, well, since we got all that out of the way, I’ll answer your question. Yes, I’ve been to Jackson before. My job takes me all over Tennessee. Now, you might want to suit up. Looks like everyone else is almost ready.”
“Yeah, on it. But I have to ask. Fake Sumo wrestling? Really? How is that a team-building activity?”
It wasn’t the first time she’d heard that question. Some of her methods could be considered a bit unconventional, but she usually got results. She wasn’t the best team-building facilitator at Connexion, but she got plenty of business thrown her way. The fact that she loved her job was an added bonus. Most of the time, it was fun as fuck and twice as rewarding. “Everybody’s equal in the ring.”
He stared.
“There’s no separation between support staff, management, or anybody else.”
His eyes widened again. “Um, is that a good idea? Especially if there’s animosity somewhere?”
“This’ll help. It brings everyone down to earth. Plus, it’s fun. Hard to hold on to animosity while looking ridiculous. There’s one executive and one support staffer per team. It’s an eye-opening experience that can be really liberating for people. Trust me. It’ll work out.”
He glanced around, then back at Maya. A slow smile lifted his lips. “It is interestin’ to see everyone lookin’ like a cartoon character.”
“Uh-huh, now get suited up and partner with an assistant you don’t usually work with. You guys are going first.”
His shoulders sagged. “Is this my punishment for hittin’ on you?”
“I like to keep things professional, so not at all.” She smiled.
He narrowed his eyes but offered a small grin in return.
Ten minutes later, Maya stood inside the ring a respectful distance away, but still close enough to officiate the match between David and his female coworker. The woman waddled around circling him and when Maya blew the whistle, she screamed and launched herself at David, taking them both down. From his corner, David’s partner yelled instructions that he was helpless to follow. However, by the end, he was talking and nodding with his teammate as they discussed strategy and shared laughter. Maya smiled and tapped her pen on her clipboard. Looks like she’d been right again, about this particular exercise. She went to make sure the next “wrestlers” were ready to go, pleased that things had started so well. Hopefully, the day would continue that way.
**
Late afternoon brought mugginess and bugs. Maya checked on her bags in the back seat of her Honda CRV. They all seemed to be exactly where she put them this morning before leaving Chattanooga for Jackson. She slapped at her neck, killing what she assumed was a mosquito before it could kill her. Then, she swatted at the air around her, just in case its relatives were set on revenge. She fished her phone out of her pocket to check social media before she left. She wasn’t the least bit surprised to see a text from her brother.
Y couldn’t u take a plane just this once? I’ll try to wait up 4 u.
Planes were never an option for her. She got where she needed to go under her own steam. Hell no u kno that’s nvr gonna happen, she replied. Sry took so long 2 get back to u was working. Don’t wait up just now leaving.
She started the SUV, and instead of another text, her phone rang. Maya huffed in amusement as she answered, leaving the car in park. “Yes? What?”
“Don’t talk to your elder that way.”
“Whatever. That joke is so washed up.”
“But it’s true. I came out six minutes before you did.” Terrance’s tone was smug. She pictured him with a smirk on his face, sitting at his desk and leaning back in his chair.
“Give or take, but obviously, since I was allowed to cook longer, I’m the better twin. I have my own apartment and car. You live in the same room you’ve had since you were eight.”
“Say it with me now…graduate school.”
“Let’s be real, T. You secretly sit at home and play World of Warcraft all day.”
“Bullshit. I gave up on that game years ago. It’s impossible to beat. I’m more into Elder Scrolls Online. My group put me in charge of our guild.”
Maya didn’t hide the affection in her voice. “You lost me at bullshit, and didn’t you just prove my point?”
“I’ll be creating my own massive multiplayer online game one day soon. You might wanna be nice to me. I’ll have enough money to stash your ass away in some shady mental hospital that still does lobotomies.”
“Winston wouldn’t let that happen. Isn’t that what big brothers are for?” Maya put on her seat belt.
“Old folks’ home.”
Maya laughed. “He’s not even forty!”
“Please. You know he acts like he’s closer to sixty.”
“I’m telling him you said that,” Maya warned.
“He’s been MIA lately, so go right ahead. Let’s see how far you get with a lobotomy and a padded cell.”
“Fuck you. You can be such an ass.”
“Yeah, well, we share that gene.”
“Whatever.” Assuming their conversation was about to end, she placed one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the gearshift.
“Uh-huh. Where are you coming from, anyway?”
“Jackson.”
“That’s about a seven-hour drive, so that puts you here around one a.m. or so. Yeah, I won’t be up. Got class in the morning.”
“That’s why I told you not to wait up. Don’t get why you’d enroll in a Saturday class.” What kind of people went to school on Saturdays?
“Yeah, yeah. Anyway. You should take jobs in North Carolina more often. I love that you’re coming a couple weeks early, even if it’s because of work. But then you’ll be caught up in the wedding. Shit, will I get to spend any real time with you?”
She’d taken a few jobs in Asheville for something to do because she had the feeling she’d need to be as busy as possible. A lump formed in her throat at the mention of the wedding. She tried to swallow it down. When that didn’t work, she attempted to clear it out. “Yeah, I should be able to squeeze you in.” She did her best to put some lightness in her tone.
“I’m assuming that Nina knows you’re coming in early? You talked to her today?”
Clearly, he had a lot more to say about this and it wasn’t pleasant. She leaned back against the seat. “She knows and, no, I haven’t. You know we don’t talk like we used to, especially the past few months. When we do, it’s mostly about wedding stuff.”
Terrance sighed. “I still can’t believe you’re gonna be a bridesmaid, and for the millionth time, I don’t get why you stayed friends.”
“Well, it is what it is.”
Friends wasn’t even the right word. She had no idea what they were now, but it was better than nothing. Maya wasn’t ready for them to be nothing. Not yet, and it had to be on her terms.
“If you say so. I don’t get you sometimes. She swore off women after being with you. Treated you—”
“Yes, I know what happened. I was there, so I don’t need a blow by blow.” Her self-esteem had taken a definite beating and she did some off-the-wall stuff to get it back, including going through women like potato chips. She still relived that moment, and Nina’s words, from time to time, but did her best not to wallow in it, since it was tantamount to throwing up acid. The shit burned. Was she pathetic for still hanging on after all this time? Every once in a while, it felt like it.
“I was just trying to make a point. I mean, wouldn’t she have people she’s closer with these days? Why ask you?”
“Does it matter? I said yes.” She had. She really had. Sometimes she couldn’t believe it, either, but she had to. She had every intention of standing there in that church with Nina’s wedding party sporting the biggest, fakest smile she could muster, proving to herself that she could do it and hopefully put an end to any residual feelings. Because, yeah, somewhere inside her lived a little masochist.
“It matters, especially since she had her head too far up her own ass in colle
ge to realize that you were into her.”
“It’s been two years. I’m over it.” For the most part, maybe if she didn’t dig too deep.
“If you say so, but if you’re not, seeing them walk down the aisle…”
Exactly. Clever ass. He was a step away from being on to her. He knew her way too well and most of the time, Maya reveled in that. At the moment, though, she wanted to keep him in the dark. This was something she had to do independent of him, but if she got the slightest whiff that shit was going sideways, individuality be damned. She was going to need someone to help her pick up the pieces.
“T, I’ll be okay. I promise. You know me, I’ll find a way to get through it.” Just talking about the wedding made her tighten up. The muscles in her neck and shoulders stiffened.
“Didn’t you just prove my point?” He threw her own words back at her.
“We’ll see. Let me go so I can start driving. I’ll call you if I get too bored.”
“Well, isn’t that what everybody likes to hear.”
She rolled her eyes, but at the same time, she was thankful that he was suddenly less serious. “You know what I mean.”
“I do. Later.”
“Later.”
She threw her phone onto the passenger seat, and just then, it vibrated. She glanced at it, seeing another text notification with a picture attached. The message was from T. Something for your journey.Curious, she snatched up her phone to open the text. She examined the meme and snorted. It was an image of Morgan Freeman, age eight. The kicker? Except for fewer wrinkles, he looked almost exactly as he did now, earring and all. The meme was cute but not funny enough to share in any of her feeds. Her shit had to be special.
Maya didn’t bother replying to him. He needed to try harder. Pushing the moment of humor aside, Maya shot off a group text to work colleagues. See everyone in a month or so. I’ll text when I can. Maya didn’t wait for anyone to answer.
She turned on the car stereo and hit the CD button, then put the car in gear. Robert Cray belted out of her speakers. His album Sweet Potato Pie had been one of her father’s favorites. He had been even more into B.B. King and John Lee Hooker. Maya hadn’t cared for blues music when she was a kid, but after her parents were killed, she listened to it just to be closer to them. The blues often told a story if the listener was open to it, she had realized. Not only did she hear the tales of love and loss when she put it on, she was part of her mother and father’s story again. Any time she had caught them dancing, she had rolled her eyes and shook her head, and called them cheesy. Still, she’d watched, and seeing them do that had made her smile.
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