by JK Galioto
The technician, who was spewing arcane syllables into the air while laying his hands on his commander, was also caught in Burning Hands, breaking the concentration on his spell. Gooch shuffled toward Jack with an uneven gait, his right arm dangling uselessly at his side, and with one mighty kick, rolled the burning sergeant off his friend.
“Let’s finish this,” he insisted, pulling his friend into a fighting position as the soldier that had had been about to decapitate Jack, his scales glowing red hot and starting to melt, gave another war cry and attacked Jack.
Gooch used his Protector perk to block the attack on Jack but was unable to retaliate due to his unresponsive arm. However, the block allowed Jack to catch his breath and begin to launch his own counterattacks. Working together, they finished off the last soldier when Gooch employed his Shield Bash and Jack used Dual Attack to plunge his weapons into the stunned soldier’s eyes, killing him instantly.
“We did it buddy,” Gooch spewed exhaustedly, going to one knee, resting on his shield and looking up just in time to see the squirming tech, still smoldering, load and fire a crossbow bolt his way. Gooch’s exhausted, broken body failed him as he tried to dodge, instead taking the crossbow bolt into his shoulder. Between his armor and hardened skin, he negated most of the damage. But when you were at one hit point, most of the damage just wasn’t good enough. Locking eyes with Jack, a slight gasp of “Why?” on his lips, he quietly died.
Chapter 50
Sergeant Pa-Koni lay dead on the ground, the fire and attack on his privates, pun most definitely intended, too much for him to bear. The technician also remained on the ground, covered liberally in scorch marks and crying.
Jack just wanted to curl into a ball and cry for an hour and then sleep for three days, but, alas, he knew there was work to do. He began the process of healing his broken body and cast a Minor Heal on himself. He knew Gooch’s survival token meant he was probably already back in the land of the living and hopefully would head back to find Jack. After waiting the required thirty seconds, Jack cast another Minor Heal and walked over to the technician, who was busy mumbling something to himself.
“Become a technician for the army, they said! It’s good pay, they said! You won’t have to do any fighting, they said!” He was still smoldering slightly, wisps of smoke coming from under his scales. Pulling rope out of his backpack, Jack used his Inescapable Knots perk to tie up and gag the smaller dragonkin technician, Li-Sper, then dragged him over to the center of the clearing. He found a large tree twenty feet away and sat down next to it, resting his back on it.
Jack wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but he eventually felt a gentle shaking of his shoulder. Instantly alert, he breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Gooch standing there, naked as the day he was born, standing in all his nude glory in a large patch of sunlight. “I have come back to you now at the turn of the tide! Also, anyone feel a draft in here?” The large man’s expression did not quite match up with his attempt to deflect his mortality with humor.
“Ack! Put some clothes on, you’ll scare the children!” Jack grinned, standing up and throwing his arms around Gooch, sobbing. Rationally he had known Gooch would return, but returning from the dead was such a foreign concept that he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. There was only one man that had done that on Earth, and he was part God.
“Good to see you too, Jack,” Gooch answered, his eyes misty. “Must be some pollen in the air, looks like both of us are tearing up like little schoolgirls.” He grinned, hesitantly moving to where he had died and approaching his own dead body. He blanched visibly, apparently realizing the implications of the situation as he froze while staring at his cadaver, a faraway look in his deep brown eyes.
“No one should have to see themselves like that. Neither of us need an existential crisis right now. Why don’t you have a seat while I get your clothes and armor,” Jack whispered, gently guiding his friend to the ground. After a few minutes of work, Jack had freed Gooch’s corpse of its possessions and had them piled up near Gooch. He made a mental note to burn the body; he wasn’t sure if anything nasty would rise from a corpse on this world, but why risk it. Why couldn’t corpses de-spawn like in video games?
When Gooch was fully clothed and armored, he looked over to the middle of the clearing where the cause of his death lay, tied up and gagged. Gooch went over and put his large boot on the smaller reptilian technician. Inhaling deeply, he then turned to Jack and made eye contact.
“Good cop, bad cop?” Jack asked Gooch telepathically as he moved over and began untying the creature and removing the gag.
“Sure. I guess I know which role I am,” he said, kicking the technician in the gut.
“Stop it, Gooch,” Jack said out loud in Common. Thankfully, Gooch had recast Comprehend Languages as he streaked back to the site of the skirmish, assuming Common would be the most likely language.
Jack bent on his knees and spoke to the technician in his own language, which Jack assumed was Ravanan. “I’m sorry about that, my friend tends to kill first and ask questions later. My name is Jack,” he said, pausing before saying, “and you are?”
The technician stopped his mumbling and looked up at him. Jack could see he was severely burned; many of his scales had melted off completely or melted and merged together. He didn’t think this creature was long for this world without help.
“Li-Sper. My name is Li-Sper,” Li-Sper gasped loudly as he said the words, grimacing in pain.
“Well, Li-Sper. You have two options; you can cooperate and live to see another day, or I can let the big fella here,” Jack said, nodding toward Gooch, “kill you and eat you for dinner.”
“I’m just a tech,” Li-Sper effused, looking desperate. Or hungry. Or constipated. It was hard for Jack to read the reptilian creature.
“What are you doing in this part of Rigara?” Jack questioned.
“Rigara? Oh, that’s what you call world A4Z-229. I was sent to check out a few anomalies on a portal near here that I helped set up several weeks ago. That’s it, I swear!” Li-Sper quaked, visibly shaking in fear as Gooch began sharpening his longsword on a rock that he had found on the ground, his cape billowing out behind him. It was a gloriously terrifying sight.
“Why are your people attacking this world? Why are you going after my world, the world on the other side of the portal?” Jack continued.
“I’m just a lowly tech. I assume based on the algorithm that your planet was a logical choice for us to get the resources needed to continue our expansion, but they don’t tell me anything. It’s nothing personal, this is just the most efficient way for us to continue to grow, according to the Spreadsheet.”
“The spreadsheet?” Jack asked, wondering what the heck was happening.
“Surely you have heard of the Spreadsheet?” Li-Sper guffawed, looking at Jack like he was a country bumpkin; at least, Jack thought that’s what the look was. It could have also been an expression of pain, anger, or confusion—it was really hard to tell from the scaled muzzle.
“I know of spreadsheets; I just haven’t heard about the spreadsheet,” Jack replied testily, mentally asking Gooch to give the tech a nudge with his longsword.
“Ahhh! What was that for?” Li-Sper cried in Ravanan, looking up at the big man.
“Sorry,” Jack replied for Gooch. “It looks like he’s getting a little impatient.”
“I’m telling you; I’m just doing my job! My patrol and I were teleported to this continent several days ago. We traveled from the teleport circle to here, hiking throughout the day and sleeping at night. I was told to perform a routine audit of the portal to ensure it is still working as intended, and then we were going to go back.”
“How many Ravanans are on this continent?” Jack asked.
“Not that many; maybe a few dozen. Most of them are planting seeds with potential allies, making way for our eventual domination. We are only a few months from completing our conquest of the continent across the ocean, Cornado. But that i
s only my speculation,” he finished, gasping in pain. “Now, will you let me go? I will return home and tell my leaders that my patrol was killed by wild beasts and I was the only one that escaped.”
Jack thought for a moment before asking another question, ignoring the tech’s plea. “This Cornado continent. How far away is it from this continent of Lyran? And can anyone go through the teleportation circle?”
Li-Sper looked uncertain, like he was debating what to tell this strange creature. That’s when Gooch gave him another poke with his long sword. “I’m not sure,” he exclaimed hurriedly. “It’s at least a few weeks by ship, but I used the teleportation circle. The teleportation circle can only teleport a limited number of Ravanans before it must be recharged by complex sorcery. That is part of the reason I came here with only five guards; the six of us drained the teleportation magic for the day, and the Spreadsheet calculated the risk for this mission as low.”
“What do you know of the power sources that are connected to the portal to my home world, empowering the electromagnetic pulse?” Jack asked, his pulse quickening at finally getting some answers to questions he’d had since coming over to Rigara.
“You know about the four power sources?” Li-Sper asked, his tone going from afraid to cautious. “Listen, I can’t tell you anymore. I’ve already told you too much!” He looked around like he was being watched, which put Jack on edge. “Now let me go,” he said nervously.
“Look, Li-Sper. We can’t let you go and tell your commanders about what you saw here. However, you don’t need to die. You can work with us against your tyrannical leaders. Join us in the fight against oppression,” Jack said passionately. He must have rolled a one on his diplomacy check, because Li-Sper’s attitude changed instantly.
“Join you? Join you! My leaders are not evil. Logical, cold, emotionless—sure. But evil, no. They want what is best for the Ravanan Empire and the universe, following the efficiencies and formulas of the Spreadsheet. You are the evil ones, so chaotic, so random. After the magiforming process has covered your world and rid it of technology, it will slowly bring back magic, including character sheets and the interface. Your people will undergo the same process that you went through, and the ones that remain will welcome the order our leadership brings!” He said this last sentence with a hiss, pulling out a dagger from beneath his light blue tunic and striking at Jack. Jack’s danger sense alerted him to this and he was easily able to dodge backwards, the knife finding only air. Gooch slid his longsword into the creature’s scaly hide about an inch, enough to get Li-Sper to drop his knife.
Switching to English, Gooch asked, “What do we do with him, Jack? If we leave him alive, he will certainly try to alert his superiors. But killing in the heat of battle when your life is on the line is one thing; not sure how I feel about killing someone that is helpless.”
“If we are going to win this war, we will win it our way, and that means not becoming like them. We may not always be able to stick to our ideals, but when we can, we must,” Jack answered thoughtfully. Switching back to Ravanan, he focused his attention on Li-Sper. “The logical action would be to kill you and move on. However, the logical action and the right action are not always the same, something we learned on Earth a long time ago. I am going to see to your wounds, tie you up, and we are going to leave. It should take you a few hours to untie yourself, and then I never want to see you again. Tell your leaders that Earth has found its champions! Tell your leaders that Earth will not peacefully submit to their rule like docile dogs! Tell them I’m coming, and hell’s coming with me!” Jack screamed the last, channeling Kurt Russell from Tombstone, trying to put the fear of God into Li-Sper.
Critical success on intimidate check; Li-Sper is frightened of you and will remain so until a counter effect is applied.
Chapter 51
Jack bound and healed Li-Sper, after having Gooch carry the dragonkin a good distance from the battle. He noticed Gooch seemed unseasonably pale and slapped a Minor Heal on him. “You okay?”
“I still have the death debuff on me; it should be gone soon though. Dying is . . . painful, Brother. Dying once and coming back with Last Stand and then dying again and coming back with my survival token; it can almost be more than a man can bear. The No Pain, Know Pain perk helps, but it is still damn painful. Like getting kicked in the heart by a cantankerous mule.” He took a long look at Jack. “You seem to be no worse for wear,” he said, giving Jack an accusatory stare.
“Listen, I know it sucks being the tank and constantly taking damage. You are so much stronger than me; I’m not sure I could take that kind of punishment over and over again.” He put his hand on Gooch’s shoulder. “I appreciate you, buddy.”
Gooch sighed. “It’s not your fault, Jacky. I’m glad you’re mostly okay, but yeah, this is getting old. I guess I signed up for it, and it just shows that I need to get better. I will get better,” he finished defiantly. “By the way, did that quote from Tombstone really work on that technician?”
“Critical intimidation success!” he laughed. “Now that the work is done, let’s loot,” Jack ventured, starting with the technician’s bag. As they searched the bodies, Jack asked Gooch a question that had been on his mind for a few days. “How come the creatures always gasp out ‘why’ when they die? I even heard you say it as you passed from this world. It makes no sense.”
Gooch stared quizzically at Jack. “I don’t hear anything besides their last breath leaving their lungs. Maybe your too-sensitive ears are playing tricks on you.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Jack agreed, although he wasn’t sure what to believe.
Their looting was not in vain. They found a stack of three healing potions in a pack carried by the first soldier Gooch had killed. Jack continued looking through the technician’s items. He found a number of odds and ends in the creature’s hiking backpack, various tools and implements most likely used to repair the portal or other items. The dagger that he attacked Jack with was standard quality, and Jack gave it to Gooch.
He tentatively put the backpack of tools into his adventuring backpack, holding it away from his face, not sure what to expect. His backpack greedily accepted the non-magical backpack. This opened up a ton of new ideas for Jack. He had twenty-five inventory slots in his magical backpack, but each inventory spot could likewise contain a backpack! Although, it would be hard to pull out items in battle. Still, he was giddy as a kid on a snow day. This seemed to be against the spirit of this world’s rules, but Jack had a fond appreciation for loopholes.
Each soldier was equipped with a standard iron halberd or poleaxe, shortsword, and backpack that was loaded with a canteen and dried jerky. Strangely, none of the soldiers had any coins on them.
They finally moved to inspect the sergeant’s body. Jack cast Analyze on his items.
Name: Fine Steel Halberd. Durability 61/65. Base damage 11-15.
Name: Fine Ring of Health. Durability 25/25. Effect: Provides a +10 bonus to hit points.
The sergeant’s backpack had items like the soldiers. Still, meat was meat and Jack threw the backpack into his backpack with the other’s backpacks. Try saying that three times fast back-to-back.
Gooch was excited to find the steel halberd, their first steel item. “Time to get my polearm skill up,” he lamented, swinging the large weapon around his body and almost slicing Jack’s head off.
“Easy big guy, all in good time.” Jack couldn’t believe he was the one cautioning Gooch. What was going on here? “Do you want the ring? I already have a ring of climbing.”
“Sure,” he replied, taking the ring from Jack’s outstretched hands. “I guess if I am going to take damage, I might as well be able to take as much as possible.” Sliding it on to the ring finger of his right hand, it magically tightened until it was snug.
Finding nothing else of interest, Jack decided on a whim to take all the embroidered tabards, sticking them in one of the Ravanan’s backpacks and putting it into his adventurer’s backpack.
Jack thought about skinning and harvesting the creatures for scales and meat, but even in their reptilian form they were too close to humanoid for his taste.
They rested for a while longer, Jack using his Song of Respite perk to help speed along the healing, along with his Minor Heals as his spell points replenished. After about an hour, they were topped off and began making their way back to the portal. Jack decided to use the three-hour trek to review his notifications.
You have gained 6 points in trap making, 2 points in perception, survival, small blades, dual wield, hiking, and acrobatics, and 1 skill point in stealth, cooking, light armor, diplomacy, dodge, parry, tracking, and persuasion. You have gained 4 points in Minor Heal.
You have learned the Intimidate skill. You have gained one point in Intimidate.
You have attained apprentice rank in the diplomacy skill and may choose one of the following perks:
Court Etiquette 2: You inherently understand court etiquette for any government that you meet, as long as you can understand their language. Additional ranks will significantly enhance your court etiquette knowledge.
Gather Information 1: You can use your diplomacy skill to gather information about a specific topic or individual. You must spend 30 minutes canvassing people at local taverns, markets, and other gathering places. Additional ranks in this perk reduce canvassing time and increase the likelihood of gaining relevant information.
Remove Racial Barriers 1: You can break down racial barriers. When you employ diplomacy on creatures of other races, the racial penalty will be reduced. Additional ranks of this perk will significantly decrease the racial penalty. Required: Court Etiquette 1.
Since everyone on this strange continent was of a different race than Jack, he decided to take Remove Racial Barriers. Besides, he was a sucker for perks that required a perk he had already taken. He moved to the next notification.
