I raced at breakneck speed down miles of city blocks. I ran not only to help get this whole scene out of my head but also to burn through terrible feelings. Why did I even care? I wasn’t in love with Cristoph. This was simply a job. But in some way, I still felt violated. I felt fooled. I felt embarrassed for both myself as well as Elizabeth.
If a sane person in normal circumstances heard my story, they’d say I didn’t have a leg to stand on.
Because I was crazy about Cristoph’s brother—Nick.
So I ran as fast as I could, my head down. By the time I reached Papa’s condominium, my endorphins had kicked in and I felt a smidge better. I greeted the doorman, took the elevator up to the Billingsley family penthouse, stuck my key in the door and entered. To be greeted by—silence.
“Hello!” I said. “Is anyone home?”
No one answered. I remembered that Papa and Carolina were at some soirée with stuffy investment banker types and wouldn’t be home until very late.
I walked down hallways to my bedroom. “Tulip? Tulip did you miss me? I love you so much.” I knelt down next to her puppy pen, but the door was ajar and it was empty.
Where was my puppy?
I heard a few excited barks and a couple of muffled yips in the distance. Where was she? Had she eaten tonight? Was she hungry? Did she need to go outside and relieve herself? I’d been paying Helga a few euros to look after her when I was tied up with all the engagement festivities and couldn’t be home to take care of her. I assumed she was taking good care of Tulip.
I wandered into the kitchen. Tulip’s empty food bowls rested on the marble floor. I paced down hallways following the sound of her muffled cries until I reached the living room. I spotted Helga on the Penthouse patio holding onto Tulip with a short leash.
“Thank God!” I stepped outside. “I was starting to worry about her. She’s eaten tonight, right?”
“Your little princess is fine, Lizbet.” Helga scooped up Tulip in her arms. “You worry about her just like a mama worries about her daughter.”
“Yes, I do.” I held out my arms. “You can give her to me now, Helga. Thanks so much for taking good care of her while I was gone. Are we square on how much I owe you? I can write you a check tonight, or I might have some extra cash in my wallet.”
But Helga held Tulip tight to her under one beefy arm and extracted a large chocolate bar from her pocket with her other hand and ripped the wrapper open. “No, Lizbet. We are not square. Youz leave a couple years ago and I think you are gone for goods. Then you come back and you are nicer than you used to be. Which makes this difficult for me.” She held the huge chocolate bar a foot away from Tulip’s face; my puppy squirming as she tried to grab it.
“Helga! What are you doing?” I lunged toward her but she took two steps back. “Chocolate is deadly poisonous for dogs. I already told you this. Eat your damn chocolate bar, but keep it away from Tulip. And hand her to me, immediately!”
“No can do, Lizbet,” Helga said. “Because I too have a daughter I love. I have a daughter who dreams of marrying a Prince some day. And I told my Ivanka many times, ‘No, my sweetzie girl. You are not royalty. You cannot marry a prince some day. You can find a nice man who is a commoner. Or perhaps a lesser titled royal.’”
My hand flew to my chest. “Ivanka who shtoops—I-mean—used to date Prince Cristoph is your daughter?”
“Why do you think I joined Plenty-of-Royals-in-the-Seasdotcom? I lied about looking for me. Yes, I loved my Herbert and am sorry he passed away. But I am happy being widow. Who wants to spend time caring for an old, cranky man? I was searching Internet to find Ivanka a suitable husband. Not Playboy Prince Cristoph. He comes and he goes like the tide.”
“She can have him,” I said.
“But only if you are not here, Lizbet, because I know these Royals. They speak with spooned tongues. They say anything to get what they want. And then they go back on their promises. But maybe if you are gone, maybe Ivanka has chance with Cristoph. Maybe Ivanka’s dream can come true after all.”
“Oh my God!” I exclaimed. “You’re the one who sabotaged the netting! You tried to kill me! I can’t believe you’d give me the best loofah bath of my life and still try to murder me. That’s cold, man.”
“I am a good mother. Just like you are. Puppy hasn’t eaten tonight. Puppy is very hungry. Puppy will gobble this chocolate in seconds.” Helga waved the chocolate bar in front of Tulip’s face.
“Stop it!” I stepped toward Helga and tried to smack her, but she backed up again. Now she was situated closer to the door that led to the Penthouse living room and I was back against the edge of the terrace. Thank God the protective netting had been replaced. I casually poked my fingers against it for a quick test only to feel my hand punch through it—again. “Frick!”
“That’s right, Lizbet. Think of your dear, sweet Tulip. Because I fear it is your life or hers,” Helga said.
“No one’s going to buy that there were two ‘accidents’ with sabotaged netting on this Penthouse terrace,” I said.
“I thought of that.” She juggled the candy bar and Tulip, reached in her pocket for a crumpled up piece of paper and tossed it on the ground in front of me.
I picked it up, un-crumpled it and read it out loud:
“I, Lady Lizbet Billingsley, have been feeling somevat despondent of late. I fear my figure is failing me. I fear I’m soon to be over the hillz. I fear I eat too much chocolate and drink too much champagne. Don’t cry for me, Fredonia. Farewellz.
* * *
Yourz truly,
* * *
Lady Billingsley.”
“Your suizide letter.” She tossed me a pen. “Sign it or the puppy gets the chocolate.”
Oh jeez. I really didn’t want Tulip to be poisoned and die. I also really didn’t want to bite it—especially not on a part-time job. How much time would it take to get Tulip to an Emergency Vet? I’d have to take out Helga. She had about forty pounds on me, appeared strong like bull and seemed determined.
When I saw a familiar figure sneaking through the living room. Nick made eye contact with me, placed his index finger to his mouth and quietly made his way toward the terrace door.
I backed toward the broken netting. “I’ll HELP you Helga,” I shouted, “if you HELP me! I WILL NOT JUMP until you put down the puppy and throw the chocolate bar in that trash can,” I pointed, “right there.” Which was located directly behind Helga. Just in case Nick couldn’t see her from behind the curtain.
“No need to be so dramatics, Lizbet.” Helga’s eyes narrowed. “First, sign ze paper.”
My hand shook as I signed the paper, glanced up and saw Nick peeking out from behind a curtain next to the door. I crumpled the paper back up and stuck it in my pocket.
“Toss the chocolate bar and I’ll throw you my suicide note,” I said.
“No can do, Lizbet. I’ll toss the chocolate bar when you jump off the roof.”
Nick snuck up behind her as I edged the remaining steps toward the netting. I glanced down. It was a long, long way down to the pavement below and I feared I would not land in a Lady-like pose. Elizabeth and Zara would probably be irritated.
I widened my eyes in fake shock and pointed in the opposite direction from Nick. “Oh look! Is that Ivanka?”
Helga swiveled. Nick grabbed her from behind in a bear hug. Tulip dropped to the ground and landed on her feet as the chocolate bar skidded across the patio. My puppy chased after it.
Helga elbowed Nick in the stomach. “Oof!” he said. My attention was torn between their fight and Tulip racing for the oh-so-delicious poison.
“No!” I screamed and leapt on top of the chocolate bar, landing on the ground. I shoved the bar down my shirt as Tulip jumped on top of me and licked my face.
“Lizzie!” Nick said as his attention turned to me. “Lizzie, are you okay?”
Helga seized her opportunity and bit his arm. He hollered and released her. She raced through the door into the living room and
disappeared from sight.
Again the Fredonia police and Fredonia Secret Service interviewed me, as well as Nick and the condominium building’s security guard. Duchess Carolina and Papa came home from their event to a house filled with men in uniform.
“Is your arm okay?” I asked Nick in the kitchen as the interviews were winding down and I watched Tulip eat safe food in her bowl.
“She apparently has short squat teeth that didn’t break the skin.”
“Good” I said. “You saved me, Nick. Thank you. But why did you come here?”
“Cristoph called and told me what happened. He knew Ivanka was up to no good. She even bragged about some kind of retribution before she stormed off with your engagement ring. He knew you wouldn’t talk to him and still wanted me to check on you.”
“Why you and not my Ladies?” I asked.
“Oh he tried calling them first. All he heard was giggling, a few drunken slurs, loud music and ‘Take it off Lord Naughty-ham. Take it all off!’ He surmised they were still celebrating your Bachelorette Party.”
“Does he know what happened here?”
“I called him. Look, Lizzie. We need to get you to a hotel or someplace safe, someplace with guards—maybe the castle.”
I looked up at Nick. “No hotel. No castle. No guards. Just you.”
He shook his head. “But what about Tulip?”
“Carolina!” I hollered.
She poked her head in the kitchen. “Yes?”
“Can you watch Tulip for what’s left of tonight?”
She eyed me and then Nick. “Of course, my love. Your Papa and I will take her to the Four Seasons. We’re not staying here tonight. You’re not either.”
“I know. Thank you!”
She kissed me on the cheek and whispered. “You’re a jewel, Elizabeth. I’m so glad we are getting to know each other. And by the way? Go for it. And you know what I mean by that.” She snapped a leash on Tulip’s collar and led her off. “Come on my little grand-puppy!”
“Let’s go, Nick,” I said.
“But what about Cristoph?” he asked.
I held my left hand in front of him. “What do you see on this hand?” I asked.
“Nothing,” he said.
“That’s right,” I said. “And that’s not changing tonight.”
After my parents died in a motorcycle accident I swore I would never ride on one of those bikes again. And yet here I was in the darkest of night, my first time on the back of a motorcycle, holding tight to a gorgeous man, my arms wrapped around his waist. We sped along mountainous roads that curved around mist-covered lakes.
Every so often Nick would glance over his shoulder. “How are you doing?”
“I’m good.” I shivered, hugged him tighter and leaned my mouth toward his ear. “My turn. Where are you taking me?”
“Someplace safe,” he said over the roar of the engine.
We idled at a fenced in, thickly wooded property armed with one guard at the entry, who saluted Nick and opened the gates for us.
Now we lounged on pillows in front of a roaring fireplace in the Timmel Chateau’s living room. The upscale lodge was located in the foothills above Friedricksburgh and overlooked beautiful Lake Susannah. Nick made us hot chocolate, called in a favor and found a local chef who delivered home-made pizza with organic Fredonia sausages in the middle of the night. Pizza and hot chocolate might sound like an odd combination—but in front of a fireplace after nearly being killed for the second time, it was comfort food and it was perfect.
And then it got even better. I looked out the three-story, floor-to-ceiling windows that faced the Lake and startled. “It’s snowing!”
“How is it that you don’t remember it snows in Fredonia in the summer?” Nick asked.
I shrugged, got up, found the door to the patio and stepped outside onto the deck. Nick followed me. I looked up at the sky: light gray clouds bumped up against each other in the sky as fat, wet snowflakes fell in a flurry onto the lake and all around us.
“It’s magical.” I held out my hands as the snowflakes landed on my palms, my hair, my eyelashes. I laughed and tilted my head back and closed my eyes. “It’s perfect, here, Nick. It’s perfect here with you. It almost reminds me of the better version of being with you in the airplane when I thought we were going to crash.”
“Oh, Lizzie.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close to him. I opened my eyes and stared into his brilliant blue ones.
“I fear you have a snowflake on your forehead that is threatening to melt.”
“Then you must do something about that immediately,” I said.
“Close your eyes.”
I did.
He kissed my forehead. He kissed both of my eyelids. He kissed my face. His hands moved down my neck, skimmed my breasts and landed at my waist. I shivered.
“I think we should go inside, Nick,” I said.
“I thought you’d never ask.” He scooped me up in his arms and carried me back inside the chateau.
Chapter 31
“I give you an A on your lady-carrying skills,” I said after he deposited me gently on my back on a large feather bed. “My turn to ask a question. ‘What else are you good at?’”
He laughed, unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it.
“Nice!” I said as I admired his chest with just the right amount of black hair and his six pack abs that disappeared into his jeans. “Perhaps I missed your performance at the strip club the other night? What a bummer.”
He leaned over me. “You. I don’t remember that you were always talking. Will you let me answer your question?” he asked.
“Yes,” I said.
“This is what I’m good at.”
“Well then fine, have at it,” I gave him my royal wave.
He peeled my top from my stomach, up over my chest and head until it was wrapped around my arms stretched overhead. He leaned on top of me and held both my wrists. “Wow.” He eyed me from head to toe and smiled. “Has it been that long since we’ve seen each other half naked? You look so different.”
He released my wrists and I flung off my top. He leaned in and kissed me on my mouth, my collarbones, making his way down my cleavage. “You still smell like mountain rain and hope.” He unhooked my bra.
I shimmied out of it, tossed it across the room, but managed to cover my breasts with one arm.
“Are those your stripper moves?” He asked. “Teasing me a bit, are you love?”
“No. But I do have one more question for you.”
“What, Lizzie?”
“Just for now, don’t call me Lizzie. Make love to me like you’ve never made love to me before. Like we are two strangers who first met in First Class on a transatlantic flight. Would you do that for me, Nick?”
He stopped smiling and gazed into my eyes, his look intense. He peeled my arm away from my breasts. My breath quickened and I lost myself in my own personal fantasy, as the most gorgeous guy in the world made me feel like I was the only girl in his.
I sat across from Nick on the chateau’s terrace overlooking Lake Susannah as we ate French toast and drank dark coffee at two p.m. in the afternoon. I gazed up into his crystal blue eyes, marveled at his high cheekbones and admired his strong arms that held me. Even better than that—I respected that he always seemed to show up when I needed help. He was a kind man. And holy spitoli was he good in bed. While I will always have a fondness for pizza, I was forever over pizza delivery boys.
But he still didn’t know my truth. “Cristoph’s texted me a million times saying how sorry he is. What if I change my mind and marry him tomorrow. Would you still be his best man?” I asked.
“Reluctantly.”
“Why?”
“He’s my brother. I owe him some kind of loyalty.”
“Which is why we’re here and we’ve done what we’ve done—five times?”
He sighed. “I think if you accept Cristoph’s apology, there’s a carriage with white horses waiting
to escort you to the cathedral. I think there’s a wedding dress that’s been sized to your recently, curvier figure. I think that there are millions of people tuning in all over the world to catch a glimpse of you as well as the festivities.”
“That’s all fine,” I said. “But I want to hear what you feel.”
“I will always be your best friend. The guy you can turn to. No matter what the problem, or the dilemma, I will always be there for you.”
“Aah,” I said. “So you think my wedding to your brother tomorrow is a done deal.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Did you just say, ‘Yeah?’” I asked.
He nodded. “Yeah, I just said yeah. The new Elizabeth is rubbing off on me.”
“What if I told you a secret that might change the way you think about me? A secret that could change everything?”
“I wish you could share a secret that would change everything, Lizzie. But I don’t think you can. And because of that. Because of that? I need to share one more thing with you, Lady Elizabeth Theresa Billingsley.”
“What? What? I asked.
“You might look almost the same from sixteen months ago? But let’s cut to the chase, shall we? Expose the truth.”
I inhaled sharply. “What truth?”
“Something happened to you when you were in The States. You’re funnier and you’re kinder. You’re sexier and a little sassier. I’ve always enjoyed the old Lizzie, but I’m completely smitten, utterly whipped and hopelessly in love with the new and improved Lizzie.”
“Oh,” I said as my eyes widened. Maybe this was the time to tell him. This was the moment. “Perhaps I should share something with you—”
“Hear me out,” he said. “I crushed on and tormented you when you were in junior high. I pursued you when you grew up and became hot. But, Lizzie?”
“What?” I asked. Even though I wasn’t Lizzie.
“This is the first time I really fell in love with you. When I’m eighty-five fucking years old, I will still love you. When I’m named godfather to your firstborn that you have conceived, carried and popped out with my no-good brother Cristoph? I will still love you. I might date other women, marry another woman—but in my heart of hearts?”
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