“It is nae an imposition, my lady,” he said warmly. “This has been set out for us to enjoy. Your second cousin, the king, gave it specially to us. It comes all the way from Lombardy, and I hear that they make the best wine.” He lifted the bottle. “’Twould be a shame to let it go to waste.” Then he turned a bright smile to her, more to put her at ease than anything else.
On instinct, she smiled back. “Yes, I suppose it would,” she said. “Then yes. I’ll accept a glass.”
Alex gave a little bow, which made Aileen giggle, and he poured two stout glasses of dark, ruby red liquid into silver goblets. As she tasted the win, Aileen thought that it was indeed the best she had ever tasted.
Aileen eyed the bed, which was laden with soft sheets and downy pillows. It seemed like a great monster, crouching in the corner. She did not want to approach it, much less get into it when the time came. Still, she thought, perhaps she could grit her teeth and bear what was to come.
“My lady,” said Alex, as he poured more wine. “I cannot help but see your face is as pale as a sheet.” He reached up and touched her hand, and to her surprise, Aileen felt a short burst of energy pass through her when he touched her. She had not felt so attuned to another man in such a long time. “And your hand trembles, even clutching the wine.”
Aileen gave a soft smile. “I cannot help but be a bit nervous,” she said, motioning to the bed with her chin. “For tonight. I have not had another man touch me since my husband…” she trailed off. How could she describe the horrors of living with such a man.
“Aye, my lady,” said Alex, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. Aileen felt a shiver go down her spine. “As I told ye, I willnae make you do anything that you dinnae want.”
Aileen felt calmed by his voice. The wine, too, was helping her to relax. And yet, she had a horrible crick in her shoulders that had been bothering her all day.
Probably from the worry and stress of the marriage, she thought.
Alex gave her a long look. “I want to prove to ye that I mean ye no harm,” he said. He stood up. “Come. I learned a thing or two from my long travels among the lands of the Saracens.” She took his hand, and he led her to the bed. “If you will, I know how to ease tension from your muscles.”
Aileen opened her mouth to protest, but Alex cut her off. “Do ye trust me, lass?” he said softly but intently, the power in his dark brown eyes growing.
Aileen found that she did. He had shown her kindness at the festival, and she believed him when he said that he did not mean her harm. Perhaps…perhaps she could let him do this thing, whatever it was.
“Alright,” she said. “My shoulder has been bothering me all day.”
Alex smiled softly at her. “I thank ye for your trust,” he said. He gestured to the bed. “Make yourself comfortable. Lie face down. You may keep your shift on, but it will help if you take off your outer garment.”
Aileen hesitated, then unceremoniously took off her dress. All that was left was a sheer, white shift that reached to her ankles. She climbed into the bed, on top of the sheets. When she was situated, Alex laid a hand on her ankle.
She tensed up at even this small touch.
“Sssshhh,” Alex said. “I won’t harm you. I promise.”
The comfort of his voice helped still her thoughts. Alex took a small vial and spread a liquid on his hands. The scent of lavender blossomed through the room. Then, he began rubbing the oil into her skin, softly but firmly, working from her feet upwards.
At the first touch, Aileen felt herself begin to relax. It felt as though she were sinking into the bed.
“What is that?” she murmured.
“Essence of lavender,” responded Alex, barely above a whisper. “Fashioned into a tincture for the skin.” He continued to rub her tired muscles, now working in long, smooth strokes from her feet to her legs.
Aileen sighed in contentment. She could not remember the last time she had been touched so gently.
Next, he moved to her back. He continued the long, sensual strokes, and to her surprise, Aileen found herself becoming aroused. She felt as though she were sinking into a deep pool of relaxation. Everything in her wanted to let go, to give in to the feeling, so she did.
Alex planted kisses along her back, as he slowly began to make his way to her arms. He massaged each point, releasing tension where she didn’t know she had it.
Then, he moved back down to her legs. When he moved his hands over her ample bottom, he whispered, “May I?”
Aileen was too relaxed to form words. She only mumbled, “Mm-hmm…”
And Alex began to massage her there. Her skin began to prickle with desire, and she could not hide what his hands were doing to her body.
Slowly, he moved his hands down from her bottom, to the more intimate areas of flesh. He moved slowly, so as to not startle her.
When he touched her in her most sensitive areas, Aileen gasped and moaned with pleasure. That sound only inflamed Alex more. He pressed and seemed to carry all the energy of the massage into her, and she found herself wanting more.
When she could take no more, she turned herself over, and pressed her lips to his. “I want ye to make me your wife,” she whispered, her voice hoarse with desire.
Alex began to stroke all the sensitive areas of her body, and he slowly began to remove his own clothes. He did not want to do anything to scare her or to make her nervous. But she pulled him to her, and she loved the feeling as he entered her and they became one. They kissed each other harder and rocked together in a singular motion. She gasped as she felt the strength of his manhood, and when she did, Alex looked down at her and asked, “Did I hurt you?”
But Aileen only gave a shake of her head and said, “Please, go on,” for she wanted more of the feeling that Alex gave her.
Aileen could not believe what she was doing, but she simply gave herself into the feeling. At that moment, she was operating on instinct. She had no idea that sex could be so…so…divine. With her last husband, it had hurt more than anything else.
However, Aileen pushed all these thoughts away and simply focused on Alex. She loved his strong hands on her thighs, how he pushed himself deep inside her. He kept asking her, “Is this alright, my lady?” or “May I?” whenever he wanted to touch her in some new way.
But it was when Alex planted tiny kisses along her forehead that Aileen began to lose control. She reached the pinnacle of her passion and shuddered, letting the feeling wash over her. It was a feeling she thought she would never experience again. Her body seemed to become nothing but light, and she dug her hands into Alex as he reached his own passion as well.
Her heart was galloping in her chest, and for the first time in a long time, Aileen felt safe. She felt secure. But most of all, she felt loved.
Chapter 3
THEY LAY SPENT AND gasping, their breath mingling in the night air. The fire in the hearth was low, so Alex got up to throw another log on. The sparks shot up with renewed vigour. As he stood naked, Aileen raked her eyes over him, appreciating every single inch of his honed body, taught with strength.
But then, he began to pull on his clothes. In a daze of sleepiness, Aileen asked, “Where are you going? Did I not please you?”
Alex stopped adjusting his belt and went to kiss her tenderly on the forehead. “Of course you did,” he said. “But I cannot stay here. I have been unable to stay the night…with anyone. I suffer from terrible nightmares, and I would not want to—to put you at risk.”
Aileen gulped. “At risk?” she said, a bit more alert.
Alex finished putting on his kilt. “Aye,” he responded. “I lash out, thinking that the nightmares are true. And I wouldnae want any harm to come to you.” Alex did not say why he had the nightmares; he did not say that he had been taken prisoner as a little boy, and had grown up in the shadow of slavery. He did not tell her that at times, he felt as broken as Aileen did.
However, he came back to the bed, and began to stroke Aileen softly, from her s
houlders, down her side, and along her legs, this time to soothe and relax, instead of to inflame.
“Sleep well, my lady,” he murmured. “Maybe it willnae always be like this.”
However, Aileen’s eyes were already closed. Alex felt guilty for leaving her; all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and protect her, but how could he protect her from himself? He stood up, walked to the door, careful to step quietly, so as to not disturb her sleep, and let himself out.
The next day, Aileen talked with her good friend, Lena, who was about her age, and very, very saucy. She told her all about her wedding night, what Alex had done to put her at ease, and how it went well.
“More than well,” she said. “I did not think that I would be able to let another man touch me for my whole life. But Alex…” She sighed deeply. “He was kind and put me at ease, in a way that I have never known.”
“I should say so,” responded Lena. “Your face looks radiant. I’ve never seen you look this happy. You haven’t been able to stop smiling the whole morning.”
Aileen blushed and giggled a bit. “Well, what about you?” she asked. “Has no one caught your fancy?”
Lena waved off Aileen’s words with a flick of her hands. “None yet. I do wonder whether the king will marry me off to some fat, old man, and then I will be miserable.”
Aileen did not think so. Lena was little more than a peasant. Her family was a family of merchants, and they had been able to make their wealth in the marketplaces; still, her family lacked a good name and title, suitable for marrying into the political upperclass of the clan. Lena, for the time being, was safe from arranged marriages.
“So, do you love him?” asked Lena.
Once again, Aileen blushed. “I do not know,” she said. “Love is a tricky thing. To love, there needs to be trust, and I do not know whether I trust him yet.”
Lena, though, gave her a knowing look. “For not loving him, you sure appear to be happy,” she said.
Aileen gave her best friend a playful shove. “Happiness and love are not the same thing,” she scolded. “Now, would you like to go and explore the festival with me?”
Over the next few days, Aileen and Alex explored the festival, when she was not with Lena, and when Alex was not patrolling and guarding the castle walls. They spent long afternoons, just walking around and talking, getting to know one another. At times, they were both a little shy and awkward around each other, because they were still virtually strangers. However, as the days went by, they shared stories and tales from their childhoods, laughed together, and shared many a fond memory.
However, Aileen could tell that Alex was holding something back from her. She could sense a deep pain to him, perhaps even as great as her own. Sometimes, they went back to their castle to make love, and others they simply fell asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms, but every night, Alex left before the night grew too late. Aileen wondered what it was that could be so terrible in Alex’s past that he would want to leave a secret. Yet, she did not press.
But perhaps she should have. Alex longed to tell her his dark fantasies, how he longed to be rough with her, but he dared not. He knew that Aileen was as fragile as a lamb or butterfly, and he did not wish to scare her, humiliate her, or make her loathe him. He was already so deeply in love with her that he did not want to risk anything.
He did not know how it happened; perhaps it was instinct. When he saw the delicate curve of her cheek, her long, brown hair, and her tiny waist, all he could think about was how dainty she appeared. She looked fragile, even though he knew that she must be very strong to bear the pain that was inside her. When he thought of how her previous husband had mistreated her, his fist clenched in unconscious anger. He would do anything to protect her, but the time came when he thought that she should learn how to protect herself.
That was why one day, he took her a little way from the festival, into a forest, where there was a small clearing. The forest was on the western edge of the castle, bordered by the jagged cliffs that led straight to the sea. If they paused, they could hear the faint crashing of waves against the shore. The sound mingled with the gentle whisper of wind through the leaves, the songbirds calling to one another, and the chirping of insects. Everything smelled green and new to Aileen, and as Alex led her to the forest, she was bursting with curiosity.
“Why have ye brought me here?” she said, once they had stopped in a flower-filled clearing.
Why, indeed? thought Alex.
“I want ye to not fear the hands of men so much,” he replied steadily, looking into her amber eyes. “I want to give you the tools and knowledge to defend yourself, even if that means just enough to escape.”
He took off his outer cloak and laid it on a rock beside them, then brandished a dagger.
Aileen inhaled quickly through her nose.
“Do not fear it, lass,” he said. “Tis but a tool, like anything else. Do you trust me?”
She nodded. With every passing day, she was beginning to trust him more and more. But there was still something that bothered her, something that kept him from fully revealing himself to her. Once, during the week, she had snuck out of her own room and had gone to his chamber. She had been at the point of entry, with her hand on the door knob to open it, when she had heard muffled moaning and cries. Her heart had twisted to hear him in such pain, but she did not enter. A passing servant had been coming up the steps, and she did not want to be discovered out of her chamber at night; it would present too many questions, so she fled back to her room.
But now, he was showing her his love.
“Come,” he motioned to her. “And I will help you learn.”
All that afternoon, he showed her how to use the knife. How to grasp it, how to thrust, and how to be brave enough to strike. With his strong, calloused hands on hers, she felt the heat of his gaze and the longing in his voice. She had been tempted once or twice to pull him into the grass beside her, and initiate kissing him, but Alex was focused to the point of fault.
Once they had entirely finished, Alex pulled Aileen to him for a deep kiss. She felt the warmth spread down to her toes and fill her with a greater longing. She loved how he towered over her, as though he were constantly shielding her with his body.
“Now, even if I’m not around, you’ll have a means of protecting yourself,” he said.
She felt brave under the shadow of his love, but would she be able to protect herself when the time came?
“We’ll have to come back here to practice,” she said. “This will take many times to learn.” She smiled up at him, her eyes half-lidded in the waning afternoon light.
“Aye,” he replied. “We shall practice many…many times.” And he bent his head to kiss her again.
As their tongues embraced in a slow, sensual dance, Aileen thought that she should tell him that she loved him. He had done far more for her than any man before. She could tell that he loved her too, in the way that his eyes settled on her face, how he delicately held her hand, guiding it into the handle of the knife, and how he wanted her to be safe.
That was perhaps why she loved him the most. He not only wanted to protect her, but he also wanted her to protect herself. No one had ever done that for her. Everyone had always expected her to stay in the castle, stay quiet, and follow orders. And she had always gone along with it, never questioning her orders. That he would stay with her and take the time to show her how to defend herself was what made her fall in love with him.
They broke apart the kiss, not wanting to, but the shadows were growing longer, and their stomachs were rumbling. When her own stomach gurgled, Alex chuckled softly and said, “Even warriors have to eat some time. Come.”
And they began to walk back to the castle, arm in arm, something that would have been unthinkable just a week earlier. Aileen was finally getting used to these small touches of intimacy. A hand on her arm, the touch of his fingers on her face, his lips against her forehead. Sometimes, Alex was so tender with her, that at t
imes, tears came to her eyes.
“I feel…” she began.
“Aye?” he prompted. He loved hearing her voice, the lilt of it, and he gave a gentle squeeze on her arm, barely more than a press of his fingers.
“I feel more confident,” she said. “Even this short afternoon has made me feel better.”
She still held the blade in her hands, but as she extended it to Alex to give it back, he said, “No. You keep it. I have others that I can use. Call it my wedding gift to you.”
The wedding. It was hard to imagine that just barely a week ago, they had been strangers. Perhaps they were still strangers, but now they were intimate ones. She had opened up, not just her body to him but her heart as well.
“I want to protect ye,” he said. “Keep ye safe.”
“And how can I protect you?” she said, as they walked along the path. “Your nightmares concern me. You do all of this for me, yet I cannot do anything for you.”
“Aye, my lady,” Alex sighed. He stopped walking and ran his fingers through her hair. She loved the feeling, almost as much as the feeling of fullness when he moved inside her. “I fear that I cannot show ye those parts of me. They are—” he swallowed. “Dark.”
Would she run from him, if she knew what he longed to do with her? How he relished the thought of dominating her completely? She was still so fragile yet, and he did not want to risk her trust in him. If she knew the strange passions that moved him, she might hate him forever.
“I can handle darkness,” she said. “I am not afraid.”
Alex chuckled darkly. “I know yer not,” he replied. “How can ye be? Ye have a dagger to protect ye now. And now look—we have arrived.
And so they had. Every time that she brought up his nightmares, he always found a way to gently push her away. As he went into his chamber, she whispered, “Ay, Alex, when will ye let me in?”
Highlander's Entangled Heart (Immortal Warrior Book 1) Page 2
