Alexei rubbed his thumb over her bottom lip. “Do it, Cassie. I want to feel you at full power. You pack a punch as you are, but I want all of you.”
Nodding, she reached inside herself. It wasn’t as easy as she’d thought it would be to pull down the wall that kept her powers at bay. Pain ripped through her. She cried out and stumbled forward.
Only his strong arms around her kept her upright.
“It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
There was no way to stem the flood of tears. The emotional and physical pain was crushing, ripping her apart. Blood trickled from her nose. The pressure made her head feel as though it was about to explode.
A primal yell escaped as she gave one final shove. The mental wall crumbled. Pure energy flooded her.
Her body bowed, and light shot from every pore of her skin. She opened her mouth to scream, but nothing came out.
“Help her,” Alexei demanded. But there was nothing he could do. Nothing anyone could do.
She rode out the excruciating shards of agony that seemed to want to tear her apart before she was finally flung back together. Throughout the ordeal, Alexei was right there beside her, holding her, making sure she didn’t fall.
Sweat plastered the flannel shirt to her body. Power coursed through her veins. It was shocking to fully comprehend just how weak she’d become.
A bead of sweat trickled down her forehead and mingled with a tear coasting down her cheek. Would Alexei accept her now? Could he?
He shook his head and her stomach dropped. Something inside her shriveled. Then he smiled. “I thought you couldn’t get more beautiful.” Using the pads of his thumbs, he wiped away the sweat and tears from her face. “I was wrong.”
I can’t trade his life for mine.
“You’re spectacular.” He gently touched his lips to hers. Death was unusually silent but watchful. Now that she was back at full strength, she was completely attuned to his presence.
Then not even he could distract her. Not when Alexei was kissing her, for the final time.
It wasn’t fair that they’d had such a short time together. But life was seldom fair. It was about appreciating what you had when you had it.
And they’d packed a lifetime into a matter of days.
Their tongues tangled and breath mingled. If there was any kind of afterlife for her, she would never forget him. His image, scent, taste, touch, and the sound of his voice were imprinted on her very being.
Alexei Medvedev was the love of her life.
She clung to him, desperation taking over, trying to hold on as long as she could. He slanted his mouth over hers, taking and giving.
Finally, Death said, “It’s time.”
Alexei released her and gave her a nod. He expected her to do it. Death was expecting her to follow orders to save herself.
She picked up the blade she’d used only once before. To take a life was not her job, but once before she had been commanded to do so.
She’d been younger then and had obeyed.
Now she was much older, had seen more of the world than most could ever imagine. She’d watched mankind crawl out of caves and create villages and towns, lived through the rise and fall of empires both great and small.
The wooden handle fit into her hand. It had been made for her and she’d spent hours upon hours practicing in private, always aware she might have to use it again someday.
That day had finally come.
The blade was sharp and deadly in its own right. But the magical symbols stamped on it gave it something extra. Made by Death himself, it was capable of taking the lives of any species and ending the existence of reapers.
Only Death could destroy a god, because doing so upset the wheel of fate, changing billions of destinies in the blink of an eye.
Everything had a place in the fabric of existence, and she’d disrupted that.
Alexei gripped her wrist and brought it toward his chest, stopping when the very tip of the curved blade rested against his heart. “I love you,” he told her.
Reaper she might be, but her heart was no longer cold. No, it was filled with the heat of love for this man. “I love you, too.”
Lightning fast, she flicked her wrist around and drove it into her chest. It sank deep, piercing her heart.
Alexei roared her name. Then she was in his arms. “Why? Why?” he chanted. “What have you done?”
Then he was shouting at Death. “Save her. My life for hers.”
“You’d do that?” He appeared almost uninterested. It was stupid to be hurt that he didn’t seem even remotely upset she was dying. She’d been with him longer than any other.
The first reaper.
When she coughed, blood trickled from her lips. The pain was enormous, but she wasn’t dead.
Why aren’t I dead?
Her blade could kill anyone, short of a god. It had been designed that way.
“Yes,” Alexei said the same time she whispered, “No.”
Death held out his hand, and the blade flew from her chest. She cried out at the sudden pain of having the sharp implement ripped from her body. Alexei cursed and slapped his hands over the wound.
“Don’t you want to feed from her, vampire?”
“Fuck you,” Alexei yelled. “Baby, drink from me. Maybe my blood can heal you.”
She raised her hand and pressed it against his beard. “I’m a reaper. It’s not just what I do, it’s who I am.” The balance had to be kept. If she drank his blood and survived, his life would be taken. Unable to hold her hand up any longer, she let it fall back to her lap.
He pressed a gentle kiss to her mouth, his tongue lapping up the little trail of blood. He laid her on the sofa and turned to Death.
“My life for hers.”
“So be it.” He struck hard and fast, driving the blade forward.
Alexei didn’t cry out, didn’t protest or try to save himself. He dropped to his knees, blood seeping from the wound and pouring down his bare chest. Crawling to her side, he laid his head down beside her, and stopped breathing.
Chapter Nineteen
“Noooo,” she screamed, her heart rending in half. “I won’t let you do this.” She yanked the sickle from his chest and rammed it into her own, hoping to reverse whatever had been done. “Don’t leave me.”
But it was too late. He was gone.
Eyes blinded by tears, her grief overflowed, followed by an all-encompassing anger so dark, so deep, she feared it could engulf the world.
Armed, she slowly stood. She hated that her wound was already healing. “Fix this,” she demanded.
Death simply shook his head. “No.”
Thought was beyond her. Acting on primal instincts, she attacked. She didn’t yell a warning but simply jumped forward, aiming for his neck. Maybe she could decapitate him.
It might not kill him, but it was worth a shot.
He simply waved his hand in the air and she went flying, her body crashing into the stone wall of the cave. A bone in her arm snapped. Just as quickly it healed.
“You need to accept what is done.”
“Never. I’ll spend the rest of my life hunting you. I’ll never reap a soul again.” Whatever it took, she’d find a way to make him pay. Or he’d end her. Either way, this nightmare would be over.
“Not even his?” He pointed at Alexei. “Even now, it waits.”
Horrified at the thought of him being lost, she focused all her concentration on the in-between and saw…nothing. “Where is he?”
Death strolled toward Alexei. “Interesting. Neither afterlife will claim him. Not unless I make them. He’s too…different for their liking.”
She was there in a flash, standing over her man, shielding him in death in a way she hadn’t been able to do in life. “Stay away from him. You’ve done enough.”
&n
bsp; “Believe it or not, I did this to save you from more pain and suffering.” He was so calm. She wanted to shake him until his teeth rattled.
“How is taking the life of the man I love saving me from suffering?” That wasn’t love by any stretch of the word.
The weapon in her hand was familiar—the weight, the size, and the power.
Something isn’t right. Why aren’t I dead?
“Why am I still alive?” Alexei’s blood dripped slowly from the blade onto her wrist and arm. She’d bled blood, but not energy like Egan had when struck.
“Because you’re not just a reaper. You’re more.”
…
Alexei heard voices. They seemed far away, but they were there. Why wouldn’t they shut up and let him sleep?
Being the curious type, he had to check them out. He couldn’t move but found by focusing his attention he could hear them more easily.
The woman’s voice drew him. She sounded agitated. Something dark and dangerous stirred inside him. The woman was bound to him in some way.
Who was she?
A picture popped into his mind of a tall woman with mind-blowing curves, midnight hair, and green eyes. And those lips, that lush, kissable mouth.
His Cassie.
What the hell had happened? The pain in his chest increased. That’s right, he’d traded his life for hers, bargained with Death himself to save her.
So why was he still here? And why was the smell of flowers even stronger?
“I don’t understand. I’m not a reaper?” Her voice was sharp with anger. “Then what have I been doing since the dawn of time? I was the first one. I was by your side for eons before you created more.”
Her age and what she’d seen were incredible. She should have been jaded, disinterested in life. But he’d never encountered a woman more engaged in living, one who enjoyed the simple things so much.
“No, Cassandra, you were never merely a reaper.” Maybe he was hallucinating, maybe he was mistaken, but Death sounded almost gentle.
He wanted to open his eyes, to see what was going on. His heart was barely beating. His breathing almost nonexistent.
“Then what am I?” He was unable to see, but it was easy to picture her going toe to toe with Death. That terrified him. He didn’t want the big guy to change his mind and end her. He managed to pry his eyes open a slit, just enough to see the two of them.
Cassie was concentrating solely on Death, but Alexei had a sense the male was aware he wasn’t quite dead yet. Maybe it was because she’d removed the blade from his chest before he’d expired.
Whatever the reason, he was still clinging to the land of the living.
“I didn’t want you to feel emotion. Love is crushing.”
“I don’t understand.” She slowly lowered the blade until it hung by her side. “Reapers don’t feel emotion.” She licked her lips. “No, that’s not quite true. They’re detached. Cold. Disinterested. And sometimes jealous. Competitive.”
“Yes.”
“Then why can I still feel? Why am I in so much pain, even though I’m back to normal?” she whispered. There was so much fear and confusion in her voice. He wished he could comfort her, but he was barely hanging on. Everything was beginning to get fuzzy around the edges.
“I fell in love once.” Death dropped that bombshell into the mix. “The emotion burned brighter than the sun, branding my heart. But you’d understand that, wouldn’t you?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
Alexei’s chest ached with love for her. After a lifetime of betrayal, that she’d loved him enough to give her own life… It was everything.
“But there’s a flip side to love. Like everything else, it dies and leaves destruction in its wake. I never wanted that for you.”
“I’m sorry you went through that,” Cassie told him. “But all Alexei ever did was try to protect me.”
“What if that changed?”
He wanted to shout “never,” but talking was beyond him. He was clinging to life by sheer willpower.
“If it did, I’d still be grateful for the gift he’d given me. To love someone is to care about them, even when they stop loving you.”
“You’d cling to him if he walked away from you?” Death demanded.
She shook her head. “No. I deserve to be loved, but I’d want him to be happy. I’d appreciate what we’d shared, even if it was only for a short time. I learned that from humans. Their lifetime is but a brief second of time. All their emotions burn brighter and harder because of that. It’s beautiful and scary. But it’s exhilarating and well worth the price.”
“Then you’re braver than I am.”
Wow, that was quite a confession from one of the most powerful creatures in existence.
“What am I?” she asked.
Alexei didn’t want to know. He feared whatever was coming would destroy her in some way. He was as defenseless as a newborn babe, unable to do more than just lie there. Hell, a newborn could at least cry and move. He couldn’t even do that.
Death cupped his hand against her cheek. Alexei tried to scream a warning, but was unable to even whisper. She reached up and circled her fingers around his wrist.
“You’re not only a reaper, Cassandra. You’re my daughter.”
Holy fuck!
All color leached from her face. She swayed, as though her legs were weak. Her eyes widened, reflecting pure shock.
But she should be safe. Surely Death wouldn’t harm his own daughter. Only he had. Alexei desperately tried to summon his strength.
…
Shock ricocheted through her. “How is that possible?” Had she slipped into an alternate dimension? Everything she’d ever believed was a lie.
I’m Death’s daughter.
“I told you. I fell in love once.”
“Who was she?” I have a mother. “Why can’t I remember her?” Death seemed even more remote than ever. He was her father?
How do I feel about that?
Death’s daughter. It made her emotions more understandable. It could have been a time of self-discovery, even joy, except it was tainted by what her father had done.
“I didn’t want you to remember.”
So many emotions pummeled her at once, threatening to destroy her. “You kill the man I love, and then tell me you’re my father. How could you do this to me?”
“Your mother betrayed me. Conspired with a primordial god to try to end me. I thought we were in love, but she was simply afraid to die. Attaching herself to me, she assumed she’d have immortality.”
“You killed her.” The confession left her reeling.
“When she tried to use my scythe to destroy me, yes. She thought with me out of the way, her child, our child, would take my place. She’d control you and ensure her own survival.”
Her own mother had tried to murder her father, but he’d taken her out first. Her stomach churned and she swallowed heavily.
“Cassandra, my beautiful child, I didn’t want that for you, so I walled off your emotions, making you cold, logical. The flip side was I lost the chance to love you the way a father loves his daughter. By the time I understood, it was too late. We were both set in our ways and on our path.”
“Why tell me? Why now?” She threw down the weapon. There was no way she’d use it, even if she had the chance. She sat beside Alexei and lifted his head onto her lap. His body was still warm. He’d always generated such body heat, warming her when she was cold. She’d never have that again. “I hate you for what you’ve done.”
“I know. But it’s an honest emotion. And I want no more secrets between us going forward.”
“How can we go forward?” She brushed a thick lock of Alexei’s unusual brown and white hair away from his face before running her fingers through his beard. It was so thick and soft. “I love you,
” she whispered, uncaring that Death, no, her father, was watching.
It didn’t seem real. There’d been one too many life-changing things thrown at her all at once. She’d simply reached her limit, was hollow inside, not caring what happened next or what she would do. The only certainty was that she loved Alexei. That was real. That was true.
“You didn’t have to hurt him.” Her voice was toneless, emotionless. Maybe she was more reaper than either of them realized. But no. That would be an insult to Alexei. On the surface, he’d seemed austere, but the real man had been loving and caring, even funny at times. She wouldn’t allow herself to crawl back into her former persona. It had never truly fit her. Now she understood why.
“I wanted to test him, to see if there really was such a thing as love.”
A single tear rolled down her cheek and fell onto his face. “He was willing to die for me. That should have been proof enough.”
“It’s easy to say things. The only way to be sure is to follow through.”
The laugh she gave was tinged with hopelessness. “What should I say? Thanks, Dad? You proved to yourself and to me that he loved me. Well, fuck you. I didn’t need that kind of proof.”
“I did.” Death walked over to stand beside them. She wanted to shield Alexei from her father, but it was too late to do that. She’d tried and failed.
“Please leave me. Leave us.”
He shook his head. “Others will come for you.”
“It doesn’t matter.” A radical idea came to her. It was a long shot, but it was all she had. “Kill me.”
“What?” His scowl had been known to send gods fleeing in terror. She refused to back down.
“If I’m your daughter, there’s a chance I can find Alexei. I’ll look for him in the in-between. Maybe we can be together there.” It was a slim hope, but it was better than none. She’d take the risk. He was worth it. Their love might be new but she had faith in it.
“You love him that much?”
“I was willing to die for him,” she cried. “I tried.”
“You did.” He sighed and raked his fingers through his hair in an uncharacteristic show of agitation. “You want him that badly?”
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