When she pushed Elizabeth into the waiting room, Mamm, Daed, Sarah, and Luke all jumped to their feet and crowded around her.
The nurse patted her shoulder, but Elizabeth barely heard her quiet words. “Hospital staff will push you outside when you’re ready to leave.”
Though she should pay more attention to her family, Elizabeth couldn’t take her eyes off Luke. Her mind was a bit hazy from the meds they’d given her. Had she thanked him?
With no thought for himself, Luke had saved her life.
Unable to get even a simple danke past the lump in her throat, she tried to convey her message with her expression as she held out his coat.
Luke’s eyes flickered, registering surprise, before he took the coat. He stepped back quickly. Had he misread what she’d intended? Before she could clear up any misunderstanding, Mamm and Sarah bent and wrapped their arms around her.
“Ach, Elizabeth, you’re all right.” Sarah teared up.
Mamm ended her hug and stood. “Not completely. What happened to your leg, dochder?”
Elizabeth swallowed hard and gestured toward the cast. “Only a simple break,” she choked out. “Thanks to Luke. If he hadn’t pulled me . . .” She couldn’t go on.
Closing her eyes, Elizabeth relived those blinding headlights. Like her last accident. Except then, she’d endured it alone. This time, strong arms had encircled her, yanking her backward.
Focus on that, Elizabeth. Concentrate on safety and rescue.
Imagining the warmth of Luke’s arms around her reduced her rising panic.
But it led to other dangerous thoughts.
Heat splashed up her neck and across her cheeks. She opened her eyes but kept her head bowed and avoided glancing at anyone. The merest glimpse of her face might give away her wayward feelings. She had no right to be thinking such things.
Not with Owen gone a little more than a year.
* * *
Luke convinced himself he’d mistaken that look in Elizabeth’s eyes. A look he’d dreamed of seeing since he turned eighteen and longed to court her. He shook his head. Impossible.
After all that had happened tonight, Elizabeth had only been overwrought. She’d probably intended to convey appreciation. Gratitude for being alive. Not admiration and love.
He shrugged into his coat, still warm from her wearing it. That brought up thoughts he shouldn’t be entertaining. He shook them off and tuned back in to the conversation around him.
While he’d been lost in thought, the discussion had turned into a family argument.
“No.” Elizabeth’s tone held steely determination.
“Be sensible, dochder. How do you plan to get around?” Her mamm’s response matched Elizabeth’s resolve.
If only he’d paid closer attention, Luke would know what was going on. Perhaps, though, he had no business listening. He cleared his throat, intending to excuse himself, but the desperation in Elizabeth’s eyes held him in place.
“Daed, please?”
David stroked his beard. “I know you prefer to stay in your own house, but your mamm’s right. You’ll need someone to keep an eye on you, especially tonight.”
“And how will you get to work?” Sarah asked. “Starting next week, I won’t be able to pick you up in the afternoons.”
Maybe he should have stayed out of the family business, but Elizabeth nibbled her lower lip, and her eyes welled with tears.
“I can pick her up and drop her off,” Luke offered. “It’s no trouble.” After all, he lived next door, and his shop was right down the street.
Besides, spending mornings and afternoons with Elizabeth would be pure joy.
Once again, she shot him a look of gratitude that warmed his heart. When their eyes met, Luke forced himself to tear his gaze away.
“Danke, Luke, that’s generous of you, but—” Elizabeth twisted her hands together in her lap.
Luke wanted to cover his ears to avoid whatever she planned to say next. She was turning down his offer. Just like she would have turned down his request to court her.
“But . . .” Elizabeth repeated, her attention fixed on her agitated hands. “I can’t work at Yolanda’s. Not on crutches. I wouldn’t be much help.”
Was that all she was worried about? Not about spending time with him. Not about being alone with him. He had a simple solution to her problem.
“I have some counter stools with backs. They’d be the right height for sitting at the cash register. I could also bring one for you to use at the worktable in the stockroom. They’re only samples, so it’s not a problem.”
“Ach, Luke.” Her voice thick with tears, Elizabeth managed a watery smile. “I hadn’t thought of that. I’ll have to check with Yolanda.”
“I’m sure she wouldn’t want to lose her best employee at this time of year.”
Elizabeth giggled. “I doubt I’m the best, but it wouldn’t be easy to train a new cashier when we’re so busy.”
Luke wanted to correct her about being the best. But with both of Elizabeth’s parents examining the two of them closely, he kept quiet.
Sarah turned to her mamm. “I don’t start at the restaurant until next week. I could spend the nights at Elizabeth’s.”
“Danke, Sarah.” Elizabeth flashed her sister a grateful smile.
Luke’s spirits plummeted a little. The gratitude in Elizabeth’s eyes for her sister resembled the appreciation she’d flashed in Luke’s direction earlier. So, it hadn’t meant anything special.
* * *
Elizabeth’s grogginess had started wearing off, thanks to Sarah and Luke. Her parents had never understood why she wanted to stay in her own place. In their minds, she was rejecting family and community support.
Daed clutched at his suspenders. “It seems, dochder, that you have friends and family willing to care for and help you.”
Mamm turned imploring eyes to him as if hoping he’d tell Elizabeth to come back home.
He gave Mamm a tender smile. “Elizabeth will be all right. And she can always come home if she finds it too difficult being on her own.”
“Danke, Daed.” Elizabeth appreciated her father’s support. She doubted she’d have challenged him if he’d insisted she return to the family house.
“We should get going,” he said. “We hired a car to get here as fast as we could. The driver promised to pick us up whenever we were ready to leave. I’ll go call her.”
“What about you?” Elizabeth asked Luke. “You don’t have a way to get home, do you?” He’d come in the ambulance with her. “And what about your buggy? Is it still at work?”
“Neh. Martin drove it to the house for me and took care of the horse.”
Daed hesitated while Elizabeth questioned Luke, waiting for the answer. “We’ll drive you home.” He chuckled. “It’s not like it would take us too far out of our way.”
Elizabeth released a soft sigh. It definitely wouldn’t be an inconvenience with Luke’s farm right next to hers.
She’d pushed all thoughts of Luke from her mind when she started courting Owen, but now the idea of his closeness sent a tingle through her. A reaction she should not be having about her husband’s best friend.
Chapter 4
When the van arrived, Luke hung back, though he longed to help Elizabeth get in. To keep his mind from straying where it shouldn’t go, Luke took the crutches from the aide.
He waited until the family had gotten in before handing the crutches up to Elizabeth. Then he climbed into the back and slid along the seat to a spot where he could gaze at her profile without her family noticing.
The air blasting from the van’s heater surrounded Luke with much-needed warmth. He hunched into his coat, but his damp clothes left him shivering and clammy.
Elizabeth, her face tired and pale, revealed the fragility she’d denied earlier that day. If only he had the right to comfort her, care for her. With no one around to watch his expression, Luke imagined a nonexistent past and an impossible future. A past in which
Elizabeth fell in love with him rather than Owen. A future in which Elizabeth agreed to be his wife.
Absorbed in his fantasy world, Luke barely heard the low murmur of conversation from the seat in front of him until Elizabeth swiveled her head.
Could she tell from the wistfulness on his face that she’d been featuring in his daydreams?
“Are you asleep?” Her voice, low and teasing, jolted Luke back to his surroundings. The van idled in front of his house. Everyone had been waiting for him to exit.
Grateful for the darkness hiding his heated cheeks, he mumbled, “Sorry,” and headed for the door.
Sarah leaned over and slid it open.
With a quick danke, Luke hopped out and headed up the driveway, glad to keep his back turned as the headlights illuminated his path.
If only he had an equally clear path for his future, but Owen stood in the way of that. First, he had dated and married the woman Luke loved. Now, although Owen had been gone more than a year, Elizabeth still wore her mourning clothes.
Luke had lost her in the past and had no chance for a future with her.
* * *
Elizabeth tried not to stare at Luke as he headed up the gravel driveway to his house. Overhead, stars dotted the indigo sky. From the time she was a child, she’d always believed the beauty of creation revealed God’s power, goodness, and love.
But now the splendor of that vastness took her breath away and filled her with a yearning too deep for words. Why had God denied the cry of her heart? The aching of her soul?
If she’d been alone, she’d have lifted her arms and cried out, Why, God? Why did You take away the most precious thing in my life?
But her family surrounded her in the van. They’d never understand her questioning God’s will. She’d watched both her parents stoically accept whatever tragedies came their way with faith and trust.
Elizabeth had done the same. Until now.
The van cruised the short distance from Luke’s and wound down her driveway to get as close to the house as possible.
Sarah helped Elizabeth into the house. “We missed supper. Want me to fix something?”
“Neh.” Sadness and exhaustion engulfed her. She only wanted to sleep. “Fix whatever you’d like for yourself, though.” She tottered down the hall, unsteady on the crutches, thankful for a first-floor bedroom.
“I’m not hungry,” Sarah insisted. “Need help getting ready for bed?”
Elizabeth shook her head. “I’ll be fine.” She needed time alone. “The back bedroom upstairs has clean sheets.” So did two of the others, but she didn’t want Sarah poking into the bedroom at the top of the stairs.
The heartache that had started as Elizabeth gazed at the stars increased. Owen had built this house with four upstairs bedrooms so they’d have plenty of room for children. The accident that took him from her had also stolen that dream.
Elizabeth dragged herself the rest of the way down the hall. She’d almost reached the bedroom door when Sarah spoke, interrupting Elizabeth’s snail-like progress.
“Luke is really brave, isn’t he?” Sarah’s breathy voice revealed she was impressed.
If Elizabeth had been surer on her feet, she’d have whirled around to face her sister. She wanted to see if Sarah’s eyes had gone soft and dreamy.
Ever since Luke had saved her, Elizabeth had been hiding her own admiration. A tiny bud of hope wilted inside.
If Luke had to make a choice, surely he’d prefer her pretty, vivacious sister. He’d never seemed interested in Elizabeth, despite her schoolgirl crush on him. She’d hidden her disappointment and accepted when Owen asked her out. After she’d grown fond of Owen, she’d pushed all thoughts of Luke from her mind.
Ever since he’d walked through the door carrying the nativity set, though, he’d intruded on her thoughts. And after having his arms around her, she found herself wishing for things she shouldn’t. Even letting her mind stray to Luke made her ashamed of being disloyal.
Sarah’s “good night” startled Elizabeth. Had her sister been standing there all that time waiting for a reply?
“Good night,” Elizabeth said faintly.
Her sister padded upstairs, and Elizabeth hoped Sarah wouldn’t peek into the first room at the top of the stairs.
A door snicked open. Sarah hadn’t had enough time to reach the end of the hall. Elizabeth braced herself for her sister’s criticism.
Sarah’s voice boomed down the stairwell. “Elizabeth? I thought you were going to clean out this room.”
Before her sister could question her more, Elizabeth called back, “I will, Sarah. It’s just been so . . .” So hard to get up the courage to walk through that door. So hard to give up all her hopes and dreams. So hard to face a lonely, barren future.
* * *
For Luke, driving Elizabeth to work the next morning proved bittersweet. He loved being with her, helping her into the buggy, handing her the crutches, especially when their hands brushed. But being this close to her made him long for more.
“How are you doing?” he asked as he climbed into the driver’s seat.
Her hollow laugh revealed inner pain. “I have bruises in places I didn’t even know were hit.”
Luke hoped he hadn’t been the cause of any bruises. Although he suspected he might be. Heat rose from his neck and splashed across his face as he recalled holding her, tugging her to him. Last night he’d been too fearful for her safety to consider the warmth and closeness of their bodies.
And now he had no business letting his mind wander in that direction. Grasping the reins in a tight fist, he clucked to his horse.
“I hope you didn’t get hurt.”
His muscles ached from the suddenness of his movements. And from the force of the van almost jerking her from his arms. But that soreness would be gone within days. “I’ll be fine, but I wish I’d moved fast enough to protect you.”
“What?” Elizabeth’s sharp question startled Luke.
She twisted in her seat so she faced him, but Luke pretended to keep his attention on the road. If his eyes met hers, he’d never look away.
“If it hadn’t been for you, that van would’ve hit me. I’d be in the hospital or maybe even”—she shuddered—“dead.”
She didn’t say it, but the words like Owen hung between them.
Luke’s resolve crumbled. He couldn’t resist turning to comfort her. With the icy roads, he could only risk a brief glance. “I’m sorry.”
As soon as he spoke, he snapped his mouth shut. Would she think that was an odd thing to say after her last statement? Or had she implied that unspoken meaning?
“I know. And you’ve always protected me whenever you could.”
He’d tried, but once Owen had asked her out, Luke had backed away.
“Remember that time I got stuck in the tree when I was tagging after you and Owen?”
Luke’s lips curved into a smile. Elizabeth had trailed them wherever they went, and she usually tried to do what they did. That day—they’d been eight or nine—and they’d scrambled to the top of the tallest oak in his yard.
They hadn’t noticed Elizabeth until she squawked. She’d snagged the hem of her dress on a broken twig below her, but she clung to a swaying branch, too frightened to reach out and free herself.
He’d climbed down, unhooked the cloth, and guided her safely to the ground. Owen had followed them to give Elizabeth a lecture about staying home where she belonged.
“How could I forget it?” Or any of the other times he’d spent with her.
Elizabeth’s voice went soft. “That wasn’t the only time you took care of me.”
No, it wasn’t. He tried to be by her side as much as he could when they were growing up. Even as a teen, after he realized he’d fallen for her and was too shy to let her know, he watched from a safe distance. Because he’d been alert, he’d rescued her several times—once from an attacking dog, once when her kapp and hair had gotten tangled in brambles, and once when her horse got spo
oked after a singing and almost dumped her from her buggy.
That was the last time he’d come to her aid. Owen had offered to drive her home from the singing, while Luke calmed her horse and drove it to her house. Elizabeth had already gone inside by the time Luke arrived. Her daed thanked him, and Owen drove Luke to get the team he’d left at the singing.
The whole way back, Owen bubbled over with happiness. Elizabeth had agreed to go to the singing with him next week.
From that point on, Luke stayed away from Elizabeth. He’d never let his best friend know of his own crush on Elizabeth. A crush that hadn’t diminished over time.
Even when Luke’s daed put some of their farm acreage up for sale and Owen bought it to build a house for his bride-tobe, Luke had never admitted the truth. He’d hidden his feelings and turned them into carvings.
“What’s wrong?” Elizabeth reached out and laid a gentle hand on his sleeve.
Luke forced himself to stay calm, but he had no control over his heart thundering louder than the horse’s hooves or his blood pounding in his ears. He managed to shake his head, hoping she’d take it as a signal nothing was bothering him.
He’d been so caught up in trying to gain composure, he almost passed Yolanda’s Christmas shop. He turned toward the curb so abruptly, Elizabeth slid toward him. Their shoulders bumped.
“I’m sorry.”
Elizabeth’s laughter trilled up his spine. “I think you’ve said you’re sorry at least three times this morning. You have nothing to apologize for.”
But she couldn’t see into his heart. She had no idea what had caused his guilt.
Chapter 5
Elizabeth hadn’t meant to upset him. She wasn’t sure what she’d said that caused his look of dismay. And she’d startled him by reaching out. She should never have touched him like that.
“Wait there.” Luke hopped out of the buggy and came around to her side. “I don’t like you getting out into traffic like this.”
“I do it all the time.”
“Not with a broken leg and icy streets you don’t.” His brow furrowed as he stared at the stream of traffic approaching. “Let’s wait for the light to change.”
Amish Christmas Twins Page 9
