"That is understandable. Please allow me to explain. Whenever a weapon spills blood and takes a life, the soul of the slain leaves a fragment of itself on the weapon, though very small. Little more than an imprint really. But it remains there forever.
“For myself, I was made over four thousand years ago and I have taken over two million lives. How I know the exact number is a mystery to me. It seems to be ingrained knowledge that I gained after taking approximately one-and-a-half million lives. I don't think it is common knowledge that this happens.”
“Has Ogun communicated with you yet?”
“No. He doesn’t know anything of my sentience. None of these idiots do. I choose to whom I talk. You will be my wielder.”
“Why choose me?” I asked, dumbfounded.
“You killed my previous owner. He was a total dick by the way. We had worked together from the day I was created, but he refused to talk to me or acknowledge me in any way. I’ve been sentient for around a thousand years, and it’s been lonely.”
I was a bit wrong footed by the total dick statement, but ignored it for now. “That does sound kinda shit.”
“Oh, it really was. When we left the ship and felt how you were looking at me I thought, I bet that guy would talk to me.”
“You felt me looking at you?”
“Sure did. Although, I don’t know how. You gave me a little salute before you started fighting Jotun. Right then, I knew you’d make a much better owner. So, I made a couple of slight adjustments, so I didn’t kill you.”
“Really? That was you?”
“Well you sure as shit didn’t dodge. Jotun has been fighting at peak ability with me for, well, since he’d me made.”
“You’ve been together so long, and you let me dodge?” I said, but I was aware the axe’s speech was going all over the place. I was beginning to think that I might be tripping.
“I did more than that. I stopped him from leaving your Mindscape, so you could beat him to death. Well, at least the portion of his mind that had entered yours. That was more than enough to kill him. By the way, that was an absolutely, beautiful double-kick you used to take him down. You do not see that shit too often.”
“You stopped him from leaving? You essentially killed him.”
“Yup! And couldn’t be happier. Now, I am yours. Let us kill some motherfuckers. Especially these dicks!”
“These are my crew mates. Though, they’re total dicks as you say, I can’t exactly kill them. But I’m not leaving without you, so here’s what I’m gonna do. I’ll try to move you over here. My telekinesis isn’t great, so bear with me.”
“Don’t worry about that. I’ll just come over to you. I can levitate myself you know.”
“No fucking way. Honestly?”
“Yup.”
“Sweet. Can you wait until I whistle, and then just shoot over here for effect?”
“Ooh, a bit of drama. I love it. I’ll be waiting for your signal, boss.”
With a plan outlined, I came out of my Mindscape. Ogun was talking to me, one hand on my shoulder “... okay, Shaun?”
“Oh, yeah. I’m fine. Sorry, just had a moment.”
“Well, sod off back to bed and have a moment there, dickhead,” someone shouted angrily.
“You really should go back to bed, Shaun,” Ogun added, then turned to the four competitors. “Until Shaun is fully recovered, the decision of whom the axe belongs to shall have to wait.”
“What!” came cries and other shouts of disbelief.
“It’s okay, Ogun. They can have the damn axe.”
“Thought you’d bottle it, Shane,” one of the men sneered, intentionally getting my name wrong.
“I don’t know what happened down there, but there’s no way you beat a Fystr,” Thor said.
I just shook my head in mock despair. “I hadn’t finished speaking, you fucking, fungal infested ball-sack.” I returned my focus back to Ogun. “Who are these guys? I can’t remember anyone being this obnoxious before we got left behind.”
“They’re from the Seshat, the ship from the Ukrainian base. Not that they are Ukrainian. They’re from across the world.
“Some of the better-performers in the space battle and the battle on the supply station have developed quite the ego. It’s unpleasant, but again, it’s not my place to correct. I’ve given you the tools to evolve. You have to choose how you’re going to use those tools. I just hope it was worth it,” he said it with a telling expression.
“I see. Well, as I was saying,” I said, turning back to the collection of fuck-nuggets. “You can have the axe if you can get it before me. First one to grab it, claims it.”
“Where from?” the woman asked.
“Wherever you are now,” I replied.
As one, they turned and started sprinting for it. They were pushing and jostling to get at it. I looked at Ogun shaking my head sadly, “I hope it was worth it too, but these guys are total wankers,” I said.
He looked at me quizzically, probably wondering what my play was.
I ignored his look and turned my attention to the competitors. I waited until they got to within a few feet of the axe and whistled. It shot straight into the air in an arc coming straight to my hand.
Ogun raised an eyebrow.
I was about to speak to him, when angry shouts came from the corner of the gym, “You fucking cheat! You didn’t say we could use telekinesis!’”
For the first time, Ogun interjected, “You agreed to the rules when you all ran, and the use of telekinesis was in no way prohibited. In fact, I am extremely disappointed that none of you thought to use the gifts which you have gained. I hope you all use better judgement when we next face the Fystr.” Ogun smiled at me and said, “Very impressive control of your telekinesis. I don’t think we have anyone who could manage that so smoothly. Perhaps not even me.”
There was definitely a question in that statement. I wasn’t sure whether to lie or just tell him the truth. I decided to ask the ancient axe. “Hey Axe, should I tell him that you are sentient?” I thought.
“I don’t know. It’s a tricky one,” replied the axe.
“If I don’t, it means lying to him. Which, I don’t know how long I can do because he could read my mind. He’s pretty powerful.”
“Just tell him then. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“He could take you off me.”
“Ha ha. No. He really couldn’t.”
I shrugged physically at the axe’s odd answer, then realized everyone was watching me. I couldn’t do much about it now, so I just spoke to Ogun. “The axe is actually sentient and can speak to me. It was the axe that came over to my hand itself. I didn’t use telekinesis.
“I first realized there was something different about it when I first saw it through the video cameras on the ship. It almost called to me.”
“Shaun,” he said, then paused for a long thoughtful moment. “I mean, how? Ember really was right about you. You seem to roll around in shit only to come out smelling of roses. A sentient weapon is something I have only heard about in whispers. I’ve never actually seen one in all my years. I didn't really believe they existed. Though I suppose if you have one, there must be others?”
“Oh, I definitely have one,” I said, trying to keep a smug expression from my face.
“If the stories are true, do you know how many people the weapon must kill? Let’s just say it is a lot.”
“The axe here reckons it gained sentience at around one-and-a-half million kills, though he has over two million now.”
“I knew Jotun quite well and he was a menace with that axe. It really would not surprise me if it had killed that many. I would not have wanted the axe, purely down to its history. However, it seems it had already chosen you. We would not have had much choice in the matter.”
“Why would it choose you?” one of the assholes asked angrily.
The axe started talking to me at the same time, “Give me to him.”
“You sur
e?”
“Damn right I’m sure. Don’t worry, I’m coming straight back.”
“The axe told me to hand him over to you,” I told the guy.
“Looks like it knows what it’s talking about.”
I handed the axe over and he took it with a big smile. The other participants in the axe olympics were not happy and started grumbling. That, of course, changed when the axe holder went white as a sheet, screamed, dropped the axe, and started clutching his hand. The axe didn’t land on the floor. It flew back over to me and I caught it in the air.
“Are you okay?” Ogun asked the injured man. “I suggest you get to the medical room.”
“It fucking threatened me!” he moaned, clutching at his bright red hand.
“Yes. It seemed it did not like you questioning its decision on its new owner. Is this matter now resolved?”
Four heads nodded in unison.
“Right, Shaun. Let’s get you back to the medical room. We will detour past your room to drop off your fascinating acquisition.”
“Yeah, thanks Ogun. I’ll just explain to the axe what’s happening.”
“Hey Axe. A few things. Firstly, what’s your name?” I said mentally.
“Jotun called me Blood Drinker. It’s a shit name, so I’d like another please.”
“Okay, will do. Secondly, what did you say to that guy?”
“That I’d float in his room at night and chop his fucking head off in his sleep, if he ever touched me again. Then, I burnt his hand with my shaft.”
“Fucking classic. I thought you couldn’t speak to anyone else?”
“So did I, but that fucker sure heard me.”
“That’s pretty crazy. You handled the situation well.”
“I hope that pun was intended.”
“Yeah, course it was.”
“Liar.”
“Maybe.”
“Ha ha. I knew I’d like you.”
“I like you too, Axe. I have to go back to the medical room, so I’m going to put you in my quarters.”
“Why do you have to go to the medical room?”
“I’m still ill.”
“I can heal you. I have energy stored in me.”
“Really?”
“Sure! Here you go.”
I felt a surge of energy swell in my body, and the horrible fatigue and dizziness that had plagued me since waking up was gone.
“It worked a treat. Thanks so much, Axe. That was amazing.”
“Hey, Ogun. My axe has just healed me. I’m not even kidding. Says he stores energy when he kills someone, and that he can give it to me to heal.”
“Truly fascinating. Can he heal others?”
“No. I can’t,” the axe had heard Ogun somehow and responded quickly to me. “I am bonded with you and can heal you only.”
“He says no. He can only heal me because we’re bonded.”
“Ah, that is a shame. How far does the healing go?” Ogun asked.
The axe started talking to me in response to Ogun straight away, “I can massively supercharge your immune system so you can remove things like poison, bacteria, and viruses from your body far more efficiently, like in seconds. I can also heal cuts, stabs, and internal damage. What I can’t do is grow you a new limb or head, so keep it together.”
“Very funny Axe.” I then spoke to Ogun, “Pretty much anything, bar decapitation and limb removal.”
“You have gained quite the upgrade, young Shaun. Go get dressed, then drop by the med lab again just to make sure everything is as it should be. I would also recommend some food. You’re wasting away. You look a third of the man I first met, and that’s taking things a bit far,” he chuckled. “I’ll wait here and then walk you back to the medical lab. I want to check on Mick.”
“Sure thing. I’ll be quick. And, thanks for letting me take the axe.”
“Please try to understand, Shaun, although I’m being hunted by the Fystr for allowing people from your planet to evolve, I’m not your leader. I’m still a Fystr. At some point, one of your own people will have to rise to be a leader. I’m merely a guide and, as such, the axe was not mine to give. You took the axe yourself, and I must confess the method was unexpected. Now enjoy your new weapon, become fearsome and help me protect your planet.”
“Will do, Captain.”
“Just Ogun, Shaun. Even in jest.”
We parted ways in the hallway. I went into my room. I gave the axe a spin and was disappointed to find that it was too heavy for me. Propping it up against the wall, I set to getting dressed. While at my locker, I saw my reflection in the mirror. I was super-thin now, my ribs protruded, and I looked really gaunt. Those three days of starvation had really done a number on me.
I really needed to bulk up. I thought to myself, like Ogun or, even better, like Jotun. I pondered that for a moment. Maybe not that big.
“Yeah, you could do with some more meat on your bones. Jotun would eat, like every two hours. He’d even get up once in the middle of his sleeping period to eat,” the axe responded to the conversation I thought I was having with myself.
“What kind of workout did he do?” I asked, not bothered that he was reading my mind. I really didn’t have anything to hide.
“Beats me. I only noticed the food. I was strangely curious about it.”
“I’ll ask Ogun.”
I quickly got dressed, grabbed the axe, then paused. “Uhm… I’m gonna need a holder for you. I had this great one for my scythe.”
“I don’t know what that is, but you don’t need a holder for me. Flip me over your shoulder. My head pointing upwards please.”
I did as I was told. He moved out of my grip through his own ability, once he was near my back. He didn’t actually touch my back, he must have been an inch away at most, and he just hung there. I moved round to the mirror again, checking it out. He was perfectly placed, and not restricting in any way. “Are you just levitating? Won't that drain you?”
“It would if I was, but I’m not levitating. I’ve attached myself to your aura. If you even think, ‘I want my axe,’ I’ll be in your hands in less than a second.”
“This is so cool. Come on. I want to show you off.”
“Sweet. I love showing off.”
“Hey, Axe. I’ve been meaning to ask you the Fystr speak all formal, speaking like robots. You spoke like that when I first picked you up too. Now you speak more like me. How come?”
“Ah, well. We’re quite attached you know, Shaun. It started when we met in your Mindscape and you cemented the bond when you entered mine. I’ve access to all of your vocabulary, and I've gotta say I much prefer this way of speaking. It's a hell of a lot more fun.”
“This is so cool. We’ll talk about it some more later, though I best not keep Ogun waiting too long.”
When I came out of my room, I found Ogun outside the training room as he said he would be. He raised an eyebrow at the weapon not strapped to my back. “I don’t know whether to be curious as to why the axe is still with you? Or just impressed at how you got it to sit on your back like that.”
“Apparently, he is attached to my aura. Go figure! As soon as I think of him, he’ll fly into my hand. So yeah, it just keeps getting better and better.”
“Yes. Most impressive,” Ogun said, staring at the axe hovering on my back.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you; what kind of equipment do we have for weight training? I really need to put some muscle on.”
“Yes. I can see you probably would want to increase your muscle mass a little. The great thing about training now is that your muscles won’t atrophy, due to your improved physiology. Even if you’re inactive for long periods. This is reflected in your strength stat that will also remain static. Unless of course you starve again. At which point your muscles will still be broken down by your body for fuel, and you will lose strength. With that in mind, you must also eat enough food to maintain your preferred muscle mass.”
“You’re seriously telling me you don’t
do any weight training anymore?” I said in disbelief.
“No. I’ve not lifted a weight in over a thousand years. I mainly train my martial and mental skills. If you wish to be deadly, you must do the same. But having a certain level of physicality is an excellent foundation to build everything else upon.”
“Good. I’ll get straight to it, and hope I don’t starve again,” I said happily.
“Good for you Shaun, and you will also get much faster rewards from your efforts because we heal quicker. If you train hard, and go through your holistic repair practice daily, you should be able to put a noticeable amount of muscle on in a couple of weeks. And at the moment, you have access to as much food as you can eat. The weights are in the room behind the training gym. If you want my advice, we have approximately a week before our next stop off, probably longer. So, get some good work in now. You will be able to absolutely tear your body to shreds and you won’t be crippled tomorrow if you use your holistic repair.”
“Thanks for the advice, Ogun. I’m totally going to spend this week building some strength up. I’ll need it to wield this bad boy,” I said, pointing over my shoulder.
Ogun looked thoughtful before responding, “I wonder if you could use your axe’s healing ability to really charge the process. If you do, don’t forget to eat a lot of food. We have plenty that is synthesizable. I do apologize about the flavor. I know it’s not great, but just make sure that you’re eating plenty of protein and vegetables. I’ve tried it both ways in the past, and I assure you clean eating is far superior to eating any old thing.”
“Yeah, great idea. Thanks for that. I wouldn’t have thought about it.”
“I would have told you,” the axe piped up in my head.
“I know you would have. Don’t worry.” I almost felt the pride come off him.
“One more thing,” I said to Ogun. “Is there anyone who can train me with the weapon?”
“Unfortunately for you, everyone here has specialized in guns, and to a lesser extent swords. Even I have very limited experience training with two handed weapons, and absolutely nothing the size of yours. I’m afraid you’re on your own. I would not worry too much, however, I think you two will work out just fine. A little bit of trial and error is as good a way to learn as any.”
Condition Evolution 2: A LitRPG / Gamelit Adventure Page 9
