by Jenn Burke
Aidan sucked in a breath as the pieces clicked into place. “We—they—have a much shorter lifespan than a dragon.”
“Exactly. The mating ritual binds you—not just in the eyes of the Golden Kingdom either. Your energy intertwines and combines, and in many ways, you become one. A dragon mating a dragon has no discernible effect on either’s lifespan. But a dragon mating a human….” Fazl shrugged. “The human’s lifespan would increase, but the dragon’s would decrease.”
Aidan stared at Fazl. “Nassim thought he was giving up part of his life to be my mate?”
Fazl gave him a sad smile. “So it seems.”
Horror flowed through Aidan. “Why wouldn’t I have told him I wasn’t human?”
“That’s not a question anyone can answer, and that’s why my brother is an idiot.” Fazl straightened. “We’ve gear and a harness that will fit you.”
“Great.” Wait—flying. In the air. On a dragon. “Uh, hold on just a second. How safe is this?”
“Eh.” Fazl tilted his head back and forth. “We don’t do it all that often, but it’s safe enough. Besides, you’re mythos.”
“A mythos who can’t shift and doesn’t have wings.”
“Who says you can’t shift? Maybe you just need the right motivation.”
“If you’re planning on dropping me—”
“No. Merry gods, no. I wouldn’t.”
Aidan glared. “If you knew for sure I’d shift into something that wouldn’t die, yes, you would.”
Fazl grinned. “Okay, yes. But I don’t, so I won’t.” He waggled his brows. “You ready to piss off Nassim?”
“I thought the whole idea of this was… I don’t know, bonding or something.”
“Oh, it is. But first we’re going to poke the dragon a bit.”
Aidan watched Fazl for a moment, but his grin never wavered. “Why do I get the feeling that whatever happens, you’re going to enjoy the hell out of it?”
“Because I will.” Fazl clapped his back. “C’mon, let’s get you suited up.”
GETTING strapped to Fazl’s dragon-form chest was… weird. That was the only description that suited. The harness held his back to Fazl’s broad torso, keeping his abdomen and lower body immobile. A smaller strap attached to the back of Aidan’s helmet would keep his head from jerking around too much, though he could still move it from side to side so he could take in the view, he presumed. His arms were free, but Nesrin, who had appeared out of nowhere to put the harness on Fazl and guide Aidan into it, pointed out handholds and suggested he use them.
“Gravity is not your friend,” she said, tugging Aidan’s hands to the handholds. “Your arms will get tired if you let them flop around too much.”
Aidan tugged on the straps. “This is quite the production, isn’t it?”
“We want you to be safe,” she said with a smile and tapped his helmet. “Have fun.”
“I shouldn’t say I have to go to the bathroom now, right?”
Nesrin’s smile dimmed. “That’s not funny.”
“I’m joking, I’m joking.”
Except now that he was thinking about it…. Aidan squirmed and put the idea out of his head.
Nesrin moved out of sight, leaving Aidan alone with a dragon he barely knew. It was uncomfortable—not just physically, but mentally. Emotionally.
He should be sharing this moment with Nassim, not Fazl.
“Ready?” Fazl rumbled.
Before Aidan could answer, he leapt upward, wings unfurled, and started gaining altitude.
It was not a smooth ride. Gravity yanked at Aidan with every pump of Fazl’s wings, and he suddenly understood the need for the strap on the helmet and the handholds. He gripped them with everything he had and considered screaming. Except he didn’t have the breath to do so—it was jerked out of him over and over again. Aidan closed his eyes and hoped this would be a quick flight.
A few minutes later, something poked his shoulder, and rumbles vibrated through him. It took him a second to realize he was feeling Fazl’s voice, and that the poke had been a gentle nudge from a deadly talon. He opened his eyes… and froze in wonder.
They were flying.
Aidan had no idea how high up they were, but damn, high enough. All shades of green covered the landscape below, from the dark emerald of conifers to the lighter peridot of new buds on the maples and other deciduous trees. Through the canopy he spotted the gray-blue of lakes, some no bigger than ponds, some large enough for a family of dragons to bathe in. It was difficult to believe that if Fazl banked to the east, they’d reach the outskirts of Ottawa’s suburbs in hardly any time at all.
Now that they were at cruising altitude, Aidan enjoyed the experience. He didn’t remember being on a plane, but surely it couldn’t be more secure than he was right now. Fazl kept his forelegs tucked close to Aidan, not so close that Aidan felt trapped, but close enough that if anything happened, Aidan was sure Fazl would grab him.
More rumbles tickled Aidan’s back, and then suddenly Fazl dove. Aidan’s scream got caught in his throat, and before it could burst free, Fazl rolled to the right, tucking in his wings so he could rotate completely before he snapped them out again to catch an updraft. The air grabbed them and jerked them up hard. Then Fazl was pumping his wings , and he followed that air current up… up… up… and over, flipping backward into a loop-de-loop.
Suddenly another dragon appeared directly in front of them. Nassim. His ebon eyes burned with dragonfire.
“Fazl!” he roared.
Fazl chuckled. This time his voice was loud enough for Aidan to hear clearly. “Catch me if you can, brother!”
Oh shit.
Fazl dove. This time Aidan did scream, but he was pretty sure neither dragon heard it over the rushing wind. Oh God, the trees were so close, getting closer, too close—
Fazl banked and caught an updraft. He dodged to the right, then the left, and then rolled onto his side. Aidan couldn’t look behind them, but he assumed Nassim was right there. Then Fazl banked left, and Aidan caught a glimpse of Nassim—of his mate.
He’d thought Nassim’s dragon form was gorgeous when it was shrouded in the shadows of the cave, but out here? Under the bright sun? He was breathtakingly beautiful.
Aidan wanted to be flying with him. Not Fazl.
He wanted his mate.
The storm inside of him expanded. Aidan welcomed it, embraced it, and instinct guided him as he hadn’t even known it could. With a soft sigh, he released the handholds of the harness.
And then he released himself.
He flowed out of the harness, no more substantial than a cloud. He heard Fazl’s cry of surprise but ignored it. His focus was on Nassim. He raced toward his mate and entwined himself around him, embracing him in a way his human form couldn’t. The sky called to him, beckoning for him to rediscover it, chase the wind, dodge the clouds, but Aidan ignored it. His mate was much more important.
“Aidan?” It wasn’t a shout, not this time, but Aidan could hear Nassim as clearly as if they stood in an empty, silent room.
“Yes.” Aidan’s voice rumbled through the sky like a gentle roll of thunder.
“Love, I can’t see.”
Love. The term of endearment, no doubt unintentional, and yet so wonderfully perfect. It resonated with a truth Aidan hadn’t felt since walking out of the woods behind Tuninas. It was hope, and it was attachment.
Aidan drew back and coalesced himself into a form that mimicked Nassim’s. He needed no wings—he was vapor and air and wind. But he liked Nassim’s horns, so he copied those. As well as the snout, the teeth, the sinuous, armored body, and the taloned feet that were almost as dexterous as human hands. He circled around Nassim as Nassim soared through the air effortlessly, his wings all but still as he let the wind do the work.
“You’re beautiful,” Nassim said.
“What do I look like to you?”
“A dragon sculpted out of a storm.”
Aidan floated in front of Nassim, taking
in the flare of dragonfire in his eyes. “Chase me,” he said just before he dove backward.
Nassim didn’t hesitate. Aidan could feel him moving through the air, each beat of his wings, each shift of his body as he banked to find the best current. He knew he could remove the streams of air Nassim depended upon with a thought, but he would never do that. Nassim was a welcome visitor in Aidan’s realm.
But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t do whatever he could to extend this chase.
Aidan wove through the air, not needing the added boost of updrafts. He could feel Nassim’s rumbled curses as he dashed ahead again and Nassim struggled to turn and ascend.
“You’re cheating!” Nassim called out.
“Am I?” Aidan taunted.
He turned and twined about Nassim again. This form had no weight and no real mass, and suddenly he wanted both. He wanted to feel Nassim’s skin against his own. He wanted to feel Nassim’s weight pinning him down.
He wanted.
“Nassim,” he moaned.
“Yes. Merry gods, yes.” Nassim dove. Aidan clung to him, not out of any sort of fear, but because he wanted to reach the ground at the same time Nassim did.
Aidan flowed away as Nassim slowed his descent. He found his human form again with little more than a thought. They landed on the bank of one of the lakes Aidan had seen from the air, and soft, vibrant green grass welcomed their bare feet.
He turned to see Nassim in human form, his long, lean body naked and aroused. His eyes were consumed by fire. The sight of that, the evidence of Nassim’s need, made Aidan shiver and his cock jump. He lowered a hand to lightly stroke himself in anticipation.
“Yes, Aidan?” Nassim growled.
“God yes.” Aidan squeezed the base of his cock. “Please.”
Aidan couldn’t even breathe as Nassim stalked toward him. Somewhere at the back of his brain, instinct screamed at him to run. This was a predator. A creature that could devour him.
The thought only made him hotter.
He lifted his head as Nassim reached him, welcoming Nassim’s lips on his own, their tongues tangling together, hard, fast, brutal with need. Aidan tasted a slight copper tang and realized one of them had cut their lip on the other’s teeth. But it didn’t matter.
This was his first kiss—the first one he could remember—and it was perfect.
“More,” he groaned into Nassim’s mouth.
Nassim pressed closer, held him tighter. Aidan reached down to reposition his cock alongside Nassim’s and grunted when their shafts rubbed together. They were close enough in height that their dicks were almost perfectly aligned. Experimentally Aidan cupped them both in one hand and groaned at the sensation.
He’d jerked off in the shower the second day he was in Nassim’s apartment, so he knew what arousal felt like and what to expect of an orgasm. But somehow this moment, this connection between himself and Nassim, seemed much bigger, much more intense. A comparison between a flame on the end of a match and a conflagration.
Then Nassim thrust his hips, and Aidan’s eyes rolled back . “Yes.”
A warm chuckle, and Aidan was tipped back, carried gently to the carpet of grass, and Nassim positioned himself over him. Instinctively Aidan opened his legs to make a cradle for Nassim’s broad, muscular body.
Nassim swallowed hard enough at the sight to make his throat bob. “I want to be inside of you,” he growled.
Aidan spread his legs wider and moaned. “Yes. Please.”
Nassim closed his eyes, seeming to struggle against himself. “No lube.”
“I don’t care.”
“I do.” Nassim opened his eyes, and Aidan bathed in the fire emanating from them. “I won’t ever hurt you, Aidan.”
Aidan moaned and pulled Nassim down. More kisses, out-of-control kisses. Perfect kisses. Nassim rolled his hips, and Aidan’s head dropped back as his body responded, falling into a rhythm as old as time. Nassim looked down at him, his eyes unfocused. Sweat beaded on his brow, and a drop fell off and landed on Aidan’s upper lip. He snuck out his tongue to taste it, and the flavor exploded across his taste buds.
“Need you,” he breathed. “Nassim.”
With a broken groan, Nassim lifted himself off Aidan. Before Aidan could protest, Nassim bent to swallow Aidan’s dick whole.
Aidan arched off the ground with a shout and speared his hand through Nassim’s hair, gripping the short strands tightly enough that it had to hurt, but he was too far gone to temper it. Nassim didn’t seem to care. If anything, it made him move his head faster, more intent as he swirled his tongue around Aidan’s stiffness. Aidan thrust his hips upward, and Nassim welcomed the movement, slipping a hand underneath to encourage it. He slipped a finger between Aidan’s cheeks, just barely brushing against his hole, and he lost it.
He came hard enough that everything disappeared—the grass under him, the slight breeze cooling the sweat on his skin, the rustle of leaves in the trees above. All that existed was the sensation of orgasm and the knowledge that it was Nassim who had brought him to that pinnacle.
Finally Nassim slipped his mouth off his dick. Aidan looked up, bleary-eyed, to see Nassim kneeling in front of him, working hard on his own shaft. Aidan wanted to help, but his muscles had been reduced to nothing more than jelly. With a grunt and a gasp, Nassim stiffened, and then warm ropes shot across Aidan’s stomach and chest.
He sighed and closed his eyes, not caring that his lips were curved in a sloppy, lazy smile. “Do it.”
Nassim brushed a finger across Aidan’s left pectoral, above his heart.
“Do it,” he said again, opening his eyes. “I want you to. I want this, Nassim.”
Nassim’s hand fell away. “No.”
Cold sliced through the warm lassitude encasing Aidan’s body. “No?”
“I—we shouldn’t have—” Nassim rose to his feet and took a few steps away.
“Stop.” Aidan sat up. “I know we didn’t plan this, but wasn’t it perfect anyway?”
Nassim focused on the lake and said nothing. The muscles of his broad back twitched and flexed, giving evidence of his tension.
“You can deny it all you want, but we’re already mates.”
“We’re not. Without that last mark, we’re not.”
“Why are you so scared? I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I can’t do this,” Nassim whispered. “I want to, but I—it’s—I can’t.”
Fear joined the chill wrapped around Aidan’s heart. “You can’t do what?”
Nassim turned. “This. Us.” He inhaled a ragged breath. “You’re probably ready to move back into your apartment—”
Aidan’s mouth dropped open. “What? No.”
“And I’ll take a hiatus from work. You can assist Harshad while I find you another position elsewhere—”
Aidan leapt to his feet. “Nassim!”
“I can’t do this!” Nassim’s chest was heaving now, his eyes wide, panicked. “I can’t. I can’t risk it. I can’t. I can’t go through that again.”
“I’m not Riladi.”
“But I already lost you once. Losing you again would kill me. How many times do you expect me to survive that?” Nassim finally met Aidan’s eyes. “I’m sorry.”
Aidan stared at him, hoping to see something other than apology and fear in Nassim’s dark eyes, some sliver of doubt that this was the decision he should make, maybe. But there was nothing. “Fazl’s right. You’re an idiot.”
Aidan released his human form and shot into the sky, not even bothering to slide his particles into the dragon shape that had captivated Nassim earlier. If Nassim wanted him out of his life, that’s what he’d get. And maybe then Nassim would realize what he was truly missing.
Chapter Fifteen
THOUGH the lure of the sky, with its windy, cloudy welcome, was strong, Aidan didn’t waste time reaching Nassim’s apartment. He wanted to get his stuff and get out before Nassim returned, because he wasn’t up for another confrontation. He wish
ed he could stay mad and indignant, but those emotions were eroding, leaving hurt and sadness in their wake.
Why couldn’t Nassim just take a chance? Weren’t they worth it?
Aidan swiped at tears as he got dressed. He retrieved the duffel bag from his closet and shoved clothes into it, not caring how wrinkled they’d get. It quickly became clear that he had more clothes than the bag could handle, but that was fine. He could make do with less. He zipped up the bag and turned, only to slam his hip into the desk.
“Fuck,” he gasped, pressing a hand to the injured area.
Jostling the desk woke the laptop. Aidan reached out to shut the computer down, but he suddenly realized what he was seeing.
A chat window.
He yanked the chair away from the desk and sat down. It was from Rye.
Finally.
I know you. Want to get together?
Aidan stared at the innocent words on his screen. His fingers twitched, wanting to type yes in all caps, but he took a breath instead. Then another. Finally he typed, That would be great. When/where?
Your apartment at 6? I’ll bring Chinese. It’ll be great to see you again.
Sounds good. And same.
Aidan closed the chat window with a shaky hand. A saying rose up in his head from nowhere—“When one door closes, a window opens.” Maybe his time with Nassim was at an end, but he had other options, and at least one other friend.
And now it was time to reconnect with him.
He took a cab to his apartment building. It looked even worse than when he visited it with Nassim. The hall still smelled of urine and mold, and Aidan vowed that first on the agenda was finding a new place to live. Because gross.
After nudging the apartment door shut behind him, Aidan set up his laptop to make sure plans hadn’t changed. His phone was in Inas’s study at the Kader estate. Probably just as well he’d left it there, otherwise it would have fallen with his clothes when he transformed and slipped out of Fazl’s harness. Maybe Nassim would send it to him or bring it to work and leave it with Jasper or something. If he ever came to work again.
“Coward,” Aidan muttered.
He tossed his duffel in the bedroom and grabbed a damp cloth from the kitchen to dust the meager living area. The amount that had accumulated in his absence was not a sign in the building’s favor. As soon as Rye left, he was checking out the classifieds for a new place.
