“Since when did you start to care?” Julian asked.
“Yeah, I’d kind of like to know that, too,” Adam said.
Michael looked down at the floor. “I told Lisette that I’m the one who killed her mother.”
“Shit,” Adam said as he rubbed his head with his hand.
“What?” Julian shouted. “Lisette, is that true?”
“Yeah,” I said as I stared at Michael.
Julian scoffed. “Then what in the world do you still need to go back to Lineage for? If you’re trying to avenge your mother’s death, then just kill this asshole now and let’s get out of here!”
“Julian, it’s not that simple,” I said.
His face burned with anger. “And why the hell not?”
“I—I don’t really know,” I stammered. “But there’s a whole system there that did this to my mom, and Michael was just a tool they used to do it.”
“Whelp, calling him a tool was probably the first correct thing so far,” Adam said sarcastically.
“What matters now is that we keep Lisette safe,” Michael said as he ignored their comments. “We’ll stay here and take turns keeping watch on the apartment until we figure out what to do next.”
“This is ridiculous,” Julian said, shaking his head and walking into the kitchen to get the stiffest drink he could find. “We need to leave,” he mumbled under his breath.
“I’ll take the first watch,” Michael said as he walked outside.
And I found myself thankful that at least someone wasn’t barking their backtalk at me every second of every moment I existed.
16
Things were very awkward and uncomfortable in the apartment.
I tried to sit and think, and both Adam and Julian both came to sit down on either side of me. Both of them tried to talk to me and reassure me that everything would be okay. Both of them tried to hold my hand and sit closer to me. I wasn’t even paying attention to any of that right now; I was solely focused on how I was going to get my revenge before the chance was completely missed.
Eventually, thanks to the whiskey Julian pulled out from the cabinet, the two of them fell asleep. I, however, didn’t sleep all night.
In the early hours of the morning, before the sun even came up, I made a pot of coffee so that I could try to stay at least a little sharp in order to face whatever the day was going to bring. Everything had been eerily quiet all night, and I was kind of surprised that no one at Lineage would have thought to track us down at Julian’s apartment yet. I poured two cups of coffee and went outside to take one to Michael.
I didn’t see him at first, but then when I looked up, I saw him sitting on the corner of the roof, keeping watch.
“I brought you some coffee,” I said.
He leaned over to take both of the cups from my hands and set them on the roof beside him, and then he leaned over and reached down to help hoist me up.
It was chilly, and I wrapped the hoodie around me as I sipped on the steaming coffee.
“Thanks,” he said as he put the cup to his lips.
Silence fell between us before he spoke again. “They’re right, you know. If I were you, I would have just killed me by now too.”
“I can’t kill you, Michael,” I said quietly. “And I think you know that.”
He nodded his head as if realizing that we were both trapped by the same very inconvenient feelings for each other.
“Can I ask you something?” I said.
He shrugged. “Sure.”
“Why did you kill my mother?”
Michael took another sip of his coffee. His blue eyes looked heavier and grayer now. His hair had gotten longer over the past few weeks, and golden strands of it were blowing down into his eyes.
“I knew that I would have to answer that question from you someday,” he said. “I just didn’t think I would feel the way I did about you when that time came.”
I had always seen Michael as some sort of conceited monster, and now I saw him for what he truly was; a man caught in the middle of something that he hadn’t asked for.
“Your mother was a wonderful woman,” he said. “I’m not sure if you knew this, but our parents knew each other when we were kids. I can remember that there were a few occasions when we would be at the same events together, you and me. I used to be so jealous of you; you had the mother that I wanted. Pauline loved you so much. She would play with you and spend time with you; she taught you to be strong and kind. My mother didn’t care about any of that. She only cared about what our family looked like to others.”
I wanted to feel sorry for him, but I couldn’t. Not after what he had done.
“My mother didn’t deserve to die,” I said.
He shook his head. “No, she did not. And I didn’t want to kill her.”
Michael set his cup down and turned to face me. “Lisette, I know who the man is taking over as Headmaster at Lineage. He is a horrible, treacherous man that has threatened to kill anyone who got in the way of his plans. When he found out that your mother knew what he was doing, he was going to have her killed. But not just killed, he was going to do much worse.”
I furrowed my brow tightly. “What could be worse than being killed?”
“It’s not important,” Michael said as he veered back to his explanation. “The important thing is that there were two options for your mother: to either be killed or to withstand a lifetime of torture and to watch her daughter suffer as well. Your mother knew that. She knew those were her only options. She knew that there was nowhere to run that he wouldn’t come after her to silence what she had found out. So, she reached out to me.”
I felt my face pale. “What? My mother talked to you?”
Michael nodded. “Yeah. We wrote her note together in my handwriting. She wanted you to know that she didn’t leave you on purpose, and she knew that you would know it wasn’t her note. But the words in it were hers. They were a message to you.”
“But you killed her!” I started to sob so hard that I choked on my cries.
I hated him. I hated him so much for killing my mother. I hit my hands against his chest and screamed how much I hated him, and he sat there and let me. Then after a while, he grabbed my wrists and put his face to mine. I glared into his glassy eyes that were filling with tears as he looked at me.
“Yes, I did. And I am so deeply sorry. I know you hate me for it, and a part of you always will. I hate myself for it too. But I had no other choice. I saved your mother in the only way that I knew how: by giving her the quickest and most painless death I could. And she knew that by doing that—that by us doing that—she could save her daughter from what they would have done to you if your mother had stayed alive.”
I cried so hard that I thought I would drown in my own tears. “I want you to leave.”
I sobbed profusely as I buried my head against his chest.
“No, you don’t,” he said softly before he let go of my wrists and held me. “If I could have left you, Lisette, I would have already done it. Do you have any idea how much I hate myself for what I’ve done, and how much I hate you for being a constant reminder of it every single day of my life? You have caused me so much anguish. You’ve turned my life upside-down and tangled my emotions into a hopeless knot when all I have tried to do was hate you and stay away from you. I have struggled against myself and lost because no matter what I do, I can’t get away from you.”
I looked up at him and wiped my face with my sleeve.
“You can hate me; you should hate me,” he said. “But I will love you anyway.”
He leaned forward to kiss me, and I wasn’t going to stop him. But then, he suddenly froze.
“Get inside,” he said.
I could tell by the tone of his voice that we were in trouble. He jumped down from the roof and caught me as I followed behind him. We ran into the house, and he dead-bolted the door shut.
Julian and Adam were just waking up. however.
“Hey, we were wondering wh
ere you went,” Adam said groggily.
As soon as he caught the look on Michael’s face, though, he set down his cup.
“They’re here,” Michael said.
“How many are there?” Adam asked.
Michael shook his head. “I’m not sure, maybe a half dozen Lineage guys. Mostly students. I didn’t see any guards.”
Julian grabbed my hand and led me to his bedroom closet. “Stay in here and stay quiet,” he said. “Don’t be worried, we’re pretty good at hiding out in closets, remember?” he teased, hoping that it would make me feel better.
But, it didn’t.
“Pretty sure we got caught the last time,” I reminded him.
He closed the door and went out into the living room with the other guys.
After a few minutes, I heard the sound of the front door being busted in. Then it was followed by the sounds of fighting. I didn’t want to stay hidden, I wanted to go out and help. But I knew that if I did, the guys would be more focused on protecting me and less focused on fighting.
So, I stayed put.
It seemed like forever until the sounds of the fighting started to lessen, and then there was no sound at all. I waited to see if there would be footsteps searching the house, but there was no noise. When the guys didn’t come back to get me, I feared the worst. Slowly and quietly, I got out of the closet and walked along the hallway toward the living room.
There were bodies of men strewn all over the floor, at least four, maybe five or six. Some had kitchen knives still stuck in their chests, and others just looked like they’d gotten the shit beat out of them. No one seemed to be moving. I walked around quickly until I saw Julian first, then Adam and Michael lying near each other. They were all breathing, thank god, and Julian was the first one to open his eyes.
I hugged him, and my eyes welled with tears.
He groaned as he sat up and then got to his feet.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“I’ll live.” He looked around the room. “How are the other two?”
Adam grunted. “I’m alive, but not really awake.”
Michael only groaned, though. No words came forth from his lips.
“I’m going to take care of all these bodies,” Julian said as he waved his hand around the apartment toward the Lineage men that had come to kill us. “You take care of Adam and Michael.”
“What are you going to do with them?” I asked.
Julian scoffed. “I’m going to drag them all outside, kill the ones that aren’t already dead, and bury them in a big hole so that no one finds them.”
I literally almost threw-up when I heard what he said.
Then, Julian’s eyes met mine in a dark, hazy gaze I’d never seen before on his face. “You aren’t the only one with a dark side, Lisette.”
I was pretty sure Julian was trying to bring a bit of humor to the morbid situation, but it was way too real and disturbing to be funny, especially with that look in his eyes. I tried not to watch as he started dragging the bodies out the front door. It was a good thing that his apartment was so far toward the edge of the campus, or else it would be difficult to explain the fucked up situation happening.
I sat on the floor between Michael and Adam until they both woke up. Then I helped Adam on to the couch, and Michael back into Julian’s bed since he was beaten up the worst. Adam got by with a dislocated shoulder that I had to push back in for him, and a bunch of cuts and bruises. I found some alcohol and peroxide under Julian’s sink, along with some gauze and bandages, and cleaned up his wounds as best as I could. Then I brought him some water and leaned him back against the couch to rest.
Michael didn’t fare quite as well. He for sure had a few broken ribs, and there was a cut in his hand that went nearly down to the bone. He might have had a bit of a concussion as well because he kept drifting in and out of consciousness while I was trying to tend his injuries.
“The aquarium was nice,” Michael mumbled in one of his semi-lucid moments.
“Yes,” I said, trying to get him to just be still and rest. “It was.”
He snickered. “I meant the rooftop part.”
I clicked my tongue. “I know what you meant.”
“Not the part where I tried to throw you off the roof, though,” he laughed a little but stopped as soon as the movement of jarring his ribs caused him intense pain.
“Yeah, that part wasn’t so fun,” I agreed. “Now be still, I’m trying to take care of you, and you’re not making it easy.”
“You know what was easy?” he asked.
“What?”
He smiled, as if he were reliving his best dream. “When I made love to you. Making love to you was the easiest, natural, wonderful thing that I have ever done in my whole life. I want to make love to you every single day.”
I smiled at his words and how they warmed my heart.
Then I heard a sound behind me and turned to see Julian standing in the doorway.
17
“Julian, wait!” I called as he turned and stormed away.
I looked back over at Michael but had already fallen asleep again. I got up and started to chase Julian through the apartment. Adam was still asleep on the couch. All of the bodies were gone, so Julian must have finished burying them and then come inside to check on how I was doing. It was the worst possible moment for him to be standing in the doorway and to have heard what Michael just said.
“Julian, stop!” I said as he put his hand on the doorknob to leave. “Please, just let me explain.”
He took his hand off the door and turned around to look at me with a look of anguish on his face.
“What is there for you to explain?” he said. “I have loved you for my entire life. I’ve been there with you every single day without fail. I almost made love to you that night in your dorm, but we waited because it was supposed to be special. And instead, I find out that not only have you slept with someone else but that you chose to sleep with the man who murdered your mother?”
“It’s not what you think,” I said through my sniffles.
“Did you have sex with Michael?” he shouted at me point-blank. “Answer me: yes or no.”
I swallowed hard. “Yes.”
He leaned in and hissed at me, as if he were possessed. “Then, it is exactly what I think.”
“What’s going on?” Adam said groggily as he sat up against the couch.
I glared at him. “Julian, don’t.”
He ignored me, though. “Oh, you know, I just dragged away and buried a bunch of dead dudes that we killed, and Lisette had sex with Michael. That ought to catch you up on what you missed while you were sleeping.”
Julian reached for the door again and walked out, letting it slam shut behind him. And as Adam stared at me in confusion, I felt my heart drop to my toes.
“Tell me which part of that was just a dream,” he said.
“Unfortunately, none of it,” I said as I went to sit down beside him on the couch. And when Adam simply stared at me, I drew in a deep breath.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”
Adam leaned closer to me, and gingerly lifted his injured arm to wrap around me as he pulled me next to his chest. He laid his head against mine.
“You’re not mad at me?” I asked.
“No,” he said. “A little hurt, but shit happens. Do you love him?”
I blinked. “Who?”
“Michael.”
“My feelings right now are so messed up,” I said as I leaned my head back against him. “But I know that I have feelings for all three of you. I’m sorry if that isn’t right, but I just haven’t had time to sort through how I feel. Everything has been happening all at once, and I feel like I can’t breathe.”
“It’s okay,” he said. “I understand. You know how I feel about you, and I’m not going anywhere. I can wait.”
“Thanks,” I said as relief rushed through my veins. “I just wish Julian wasn’t so upset with me.”
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“Give him some time, I bet he’ll come around. You two have been friends your whole lives. If nothing else, that won’t change. He’s just hurt right now; he’ll get over it.”
“How did you get to be so wise?” I teased.
“I’ll tell you all the stories about it someday,” Adam laughed.
“I look forward to that,” I said.
And I truly meant it.
I cared so much for Adam, and for Julian, and for Michael. And because of that, I knew I couldn’t keep putting any of them in more danger because of me. Eventually, Lineage would be back, and there would be more fighting. Maybe next time it would be worse. Once the guys were healed up, and hopefully, once I mended my relationship with Julian, I had to make sure they didn’t follow me into another fight. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if anything happened to any of them.
“I should go out and look for him,” I said as I got up from the couch. “There could be more guys creeping around out there.”
“I doubt it,” Adam said. “Lineage won’t risk sending another group of men so soon. It’s too high-profile to be trying to assassinate someone right on the campus. I’m guessing we have at least have a couple more days before they try again.”
I looked toward the door, wondering what Julian was doing out there and hoping he wouldn’t do something stupid just because he was upset.
“I’ll go see what he’s up to,” Adam offered.
I rubbed his back. “You’re hurt, you should stay here and rest.”
“I’m okay. Besides, I don’t think you’re the first person he wants to see right now.”
I’m sure that was true.
I helped Adam up from the couch, and after he went out to talk with Julian, I walked back to the bedroom to check on Michael. He was still asleep, and I was exhausted from not having slept last night and from all the emotional trauma of today.
So, I climbed carefully into the bed next to him and fell asleep.
It was good to dream about my mother again. I hadn’t had a dream with her in it for a while. When I went too long without dreaming about her, I started to get worried that I wouldn’t remember her face. That was always my biggest fear that I would forget the things about her that mattered; the look of her face, the sound of her voice, the way her fingers felt when she ran them through my hair.
Ruined: A Dark Bully Reverse Harem Romance (Beautiful Tyrants Book 1) Page 11
