“Nah. We were never really friends. I was only a freshman, and he was a senior, but if he walked into the lunchroom with all his friends, and saw me sitting alone, he’d come over and join me. He made my freshman year tolerable.”
That was exactly how Ruby felt about him. Sean was, by far, the sweetest guy she’d ever met, and her life had been otherwise devoid of sweetness. In fact, he’d made such an impression on her that she’d moved back to her college town six years after moving away, just to make a play for him. “So, you don’t know anything about him now?” she persisted.
He closed the book. “I know he went to Gibson, and I saw him working at this chicken place when I was still in high school. Why?”
Ruby shrugged.
He set the book on the coffee table, stretched up, and put his arm around her shoulder. She leaned forward, breaking his embrace. She had to get this yearbook!
She patted the cover. “You know, my friend Hilary dated a guy who graduated from Kamata High this year.…Can I borrow this to show her? I’d give it back, of course.”
“Sure. Anything you want, Babe.”
Babe? She turned to face him, to tell him she had to get going, and suddenly he was kissing her. She started to push him away, remembered the yearbook, and forced her fists back down into her lap. She could live through one kiss to stay in his good books.
She sat stiffly and endured it.
Her reaction must have empowered him, because suddenly his tongue was in her mouth, groping and thrusting down her throat, and she felt his clumsy hands snake beneath her sweater and begin fondling her breasts over her bra.
She wrenched her head away, acutely aware of his slobber on her face. She grabbed his wrists to still his roving hands and said, “Whoa. Slow down, Cowboy.”
He easily broke her grasp, grabbed the back of her head with one hand and began to suck fiercely on her neck as his other hand finally wrestled her breast free of its restraining cup. He rolled her nipple hard between his thumb and forefinger.
“Ow! Stop it.” She struggled to pull away and knock his hand away from her breast.
“I can’t help myself. You look so beautiful tonight, and I’ve waited so long,” he whispered, before returning to suck on her sore neck with renewed vigor.
Ruby tried to push him off, but he weighed too much, and then she slid down the couch towards the floor, but all this did was hike her skirt up around her waist. He was crushing her, and she could feel his growing erection against her leg. She began to struggle in earnest.
“Jeremy! No! Stop it!”
He didn’t seem to hear her. She felt him grab the top of her panties and begin to slide them down. She wrenched her thighs together, but he easily pulled her panties to her knees. She started kicking and pummeling and clawing at him and she could hear herself breathing hard in sharp little gasps. “Jeremy, stop it! No! I don’t want this! Get off of me! NO, NO, NO! Help!”
He let go of her to unzip his pants, and she rammed her elbow into his face. He let out a soft “Oooof,” and reared back, off balance. She shoved him as hard as she could in the chest and he toppled backwards over the coffee table, shattering a candy dish with his elbow, coffee flying everywhere. Hard candies littered the floor like stray marbles among the broken glass and coffee puddles.
She scrambled to pull up her panties as he sat up and looked at her. His face and neck were flushed, and he looked dazed. He rubbed his elbow. “You hit me,” he said. “Why? I thought this was what you wanted? I thought this was why you came.”
She jumped to her feet and started smoothing down her skirt and plucking at her sweater and sidestepping jerkily. She was shaking and her heart was pounding, and she lied. “I just got my period, that’s all.”
“Oh.” His face fell comically. “That’s okay. We can—”
“No! I’m getting really bad cramps like I always do.” She bent over, grabbed her lower belly, and moaned. “Owwww! I need a long, hot bath.”
He frowned. “You’re welcome to take one here. I could run down to the drug store and get you some Midol.”
Ruby made sure she grabbed the yearbook and her purse on her beeline towards the door. “No thanks. I’m going home. Make it an early night.”
He grabbed her arm before she opened the door and gave an odd laugh. “Can I at least get a good night kiss before my cold shower?”
He still had an erection, and she struggled to keep her fear and loathing off her face. She went to peck him on the cheek, but he turned his face at the last minute, and her kiss landed on the corner of his open mouth. She jerked her lips away, tore open the door and called out, “Bye,” as she hurried down the walk. She did not look back. She flung herself inside her car as if Satan himself was hot on her heels, locking the door behind her. She glanced up at the convertible roof on the Mini and shivered. Should have gone for a regular hard top. Better to keep the psychos out, my dear.
“Call me!” he yelled from the porch.
She was shaking as she drove away.
She pulled over on the first side street she came to, hunched over the wheel, and burst into tears.
CHAPTER 5
Ruby sat on the couch with her head in her hands. She had almost gotten raped over a high school yearbook. How could she have been so stupid?
She stayed in this position until her shoulders began to ache. Finally, she relaxed back and touched the yearbook that lay beside her. She brushed the cover gently. And yet…she hadn’t gotten raped. Jeremy had stopped. He hadn’t prevented her from leaving. And now she had Sean’s senior yearbook to look through at her leisure.
…It had been worth it.
Before she looked through it, she wanted to call Sean’s parent’s house again. Maybe hear his voice one last time before bed. And she wanted to tape the conversation in case he answered, but she wasn’t sure how to do it.
After some thought, she opened the Voice Memos app on her cellphone, called Sean’s number on the disposable, hit the speaker button, and started the Voice memo recording. A moment later, the phone was picked up on the other end and she heard Sean laughing. “Hello?” he said. Ruby froze, trying to breathe shallowly lest he accidentally recognize her breathing over the phone lines.
“Hello? Hel-loow? Well, whoever you are, have a nice night. I know we will.”
She stopped the recording and frowned. “We” will? He better not have a girl over there…No. He was at his parent’s house. Relax.
She pressed play, closed her eyes, and listened to it four times in a row. She downloaded an app and sent the clip to a rarely used Dropbox account of hers. Once she was certain the clip had made it, and that it worked, she deleted the recording from her phone.
She snuggled underneath an old quilt, opened the yearbook and remembered Hillary Shaw, the girl that Jeremy said he’d dated back in high school. Overcome with curiosity, she searched every grade, starting with the freshmen, for her name. Just when Ruby was certain that Jeremy had made up the name Hillary Shaw, she found her picture in the senior section.
Hillary was a beauty with clear skin, shiny blonde hair, and big doe eyes. Ruby discovered that she’d been both cheer captain and Homecoming Queen that year. Ruby smirked, flipping back and forth between Jeremy’s awful freshman picture and Hillary Shaw’s beautiful senior one. Yeah right. Ain’t no way that tapped that.
So, he was a liar. Good to know. She filed this information away for future reference.
She grabbed her Post It flags, turned back to the front of the book, and spent a relaxing half hour searching every candid shot, team photo, and club photo for Sean.
She had only expected to find a few photos of him inside. She was in her own senior yearbook only twice. But Kamata High was a small school, and he’d obviously been popular. By her final count, Sean was in his yearbook eight times. Tomorrow she would scan and print them off for inclusion into her Sean scrapbook.
There was his class picture in his fake tuxedo with his hair nice and long the way she loved it, a
nd the pictures she’d already seen of him with the soccer team and in the bleachers. He had, in fact, won for friendliest guy, and he was posing with his arm around some nasty chick named Jenny Thomas, aka friendliest girl. She would cut that bitch out before pasting it in her scrapbook. Or maybe she’d Photoshop a high school picture of herself over top of Jenny’s. Even better.
He’d also won for best smile, and she couldn’t stop staring at the picture. He really did have the best smile. There he was grimacing in the back row of a photo for the volleyball team: the sun had obviously been in his eyes, stupid photographer, and there was one of him munching a sandwich in the cafeteria. The last picture was her favorite because it showed his sense of humor so well. He had one foot on the curb, and he was looking at his watch, posing like a model with a quirky grin on his face. The caption read, “Time flies for Sean Chaplin.”
After she’d located them all, she flipped back and forth wistfully between the different photos for almost an hour, daydreaming over each one in turn. If only…
What if…She bolted upright so quickly she knocked the book off her lap. What if Sean had signed Jeremy’s yearbook? She yanked the book open to the front and sighed. It had only been signed twice. The first said, “I don’t know you very well, but have a cool summer. Douglas Waters.” The other said, “Your an asshole! Ha Ha! I hope I don’t see you over the summer. If I do, I’ll be sure to run the other way. Steve.” She shook her head. Freshmen boys were so…stupid.
She flipped the book to the back and there it was. Sean’s was the only other signature in the book. How pathetic. He’d written, “To a cool dude. Have a great summer! I hope you make varsity next year. Keep practicing! Sean Chaplin.”
She ran her fingers over the words, feeling the indentations and wishing she could steal the page. Sean had actually touched it. She sniffed it, but it just smelled like a musty old book. She gave his signature a tiny, experimental lick, but she couldn’t pick up even the faintest taste of his sweat. She wanted this page—the original, not a copy—but Sean had signed on the back cover, and there was no way she could tear it off without Jeremy noticing. She’d have to settle for a copy. But…she smiled. She’d send it off to a handwriting specialist to see what they could tell her.
She set the book down on the coffee table and stood. Her keys were hanging beside the back door, and she got them before settling back in her spot again. She leaned forward and unlocked the drawer in the coffee table. Her Sean scrapbook was the only thing inside. She’d gotten into the habit of locking it away from Simon and had kept it up after.
It was a large, square book with a burnished metal cover. The cover had a small heart cutout in each corner, and the cardboard peeking through the hearts was black. Centered in the middle of the cover was a white heart sticker where she’d written, “All I know about Sean Chaplin. Started October thirtieth.” She gazed at the year. How was it possible that she’d already wasted nine precious years? She’d do anything to get them back.
She settled back against the arm of the couch, covered herself with the quilt again, propped the book on her bent knees, and opened it.
The first two pages were covered with her old handwriting. At the top she’d written, “Character Sketch,” and underneath that she’d centered his name. She began to read.
I wonder if his middle name is Charles? Get it? Charlie Chaplin? Ha! Remember to ask him.
She hadn’t remembered to ask him, and it would’ve made her search for him much easier. The Sean Chaplin she’d found on the internet that had lived in Gibson County and was born in the right year, had a middle name that started with a W. Last month she’d made a note of this in the scrapbook, along with a likely guess. Sean William Chaplin. Lovely.
She kept reading.
He just turned twenty-one, and his birthday’s on October eighteenth, which is just one day before my birthday—two years apart. We’re practically twins! We’re for sure meant for each other!
His mother’s Hupa, and she teaches Woman’s Studies at GSU, and his dad’s a judge. Sean’s a math major, but he’s a good artist too. He’s a junior. He’s exactly five foot eleven inches tall and weighs about 150 pounds? He has straight black hair, and light brown eyes, and he’s long-limbed and flexible. He has the best hands! They’re lean, with long, beautiful fingers. He has bushy eyebrows and he’s always smiling. He loves to laugh and joke around, and he chatters non-stop.
He has fair skin, and he loves sports. I know he plays soccer, basketball, and racquetball, but probably others as well. He loves music and he sings a lot, and he was in a local band called the Othello’s where he played the keyboard. I haven’t heard him play yet (Damn it!). But he told me once that they sucked. I’m sure he was mistaken. He’s good at everything. I wish he’d write me a song, and he will. Someday.
He watches a lot of television. He drives a new, gray, Honda Prelude (a bit carelessly, I think he’s gotten a few tickets), with the license plate number 63UK1203.
He’s super sweet, and he drinks a lot of beer. He’s extremely close to his family, which includes at least one sister and a couple brothers. He’s the youngest? (I think.) He loves to eat, though he’s perpetually short on cash. He’s kind to old people and animals (he just got the cutest white puppy!) and he’s endearingly clumsy. He has a lot of energy and a great body. He’s muscular, but not too buff, and he doesn’t have a lot of body hair (thank GOD!).
He’s quick-witted, but he can be moody. I bet he’s a great lover, and he does wonders for a pair of blue jeans. He called me once due to a misunderstanding, and his best friend’s name is James Monroe.
Now for the bad news. I believe he’s got a blonde girlfriend named Millicent (BITCH!!!!!). And she is NOT pretty, in fact, she’s a troll, but this is just a minor setback. He will be mine!!!!!
Ruby was breathing as hard as if she’d just climbed three flights of stairs. She wanted him now, more than ever.
She turned the page, to a little cartoon of them both on top of a wedding cake, beside a pull-out timeline depicting every encounter they’d ever had in exhaustive detail. She’d attached entire conversations. All their painting classes together. That one time they’d run into each other in the Science building hallway. That time she’d delivered a pizza to his roommate. That time she’d seen him eating a sandwich in the Quad. …Details about exactly what they’d each been wearing. Even things she’d been thinking at the time. These were so vivid that when she read them, it was almost like she was reliving the events.
If only she’d gotten him back then, how different her life would be now. She’d probably have a three or four-year-old child now, with maybe, a second on the way. She blinked rapidly and bit her lip. She would somehow make him see that they were soulmates. She deserved her happily ever after.
Finally, she came to their last encounter. August nineteenth, just over six years ago. It had happened at the DMV in the neighboring city of Calua. Her friend Sarah had needed to renew her license, and Ruby had gone along to keep her company.
The lines were long, and Ruby left Sarah in line and went to sit by the window. She wore baggy jeans, a baseball cap, and a paint-stained sweatshirt. She hadn’t showered yet because she had an interview at Mona’s Café at four, and she was planning on showering right before. She felt completely disgusting, and so, of course, in walked Sean Chaplin with the ugly Millicent in tow.
Before Ruby could slink away, Sean spotted her and began waving frantically. He pecked Millicent on the cheek, left her in line far behind Sarah, and loped over. Ruby touched her stupid hat, brushed off her shirt, and hoped she didn’t have bad breath. She stood up to greet him.
“Ruby, hi.” he cried, skidding to a halt in front of her. He wore ancient Levi’s that had faded almost white and a blue sweater with snowflakes on it. He was so beautiful…could she hug him? She started to reach up, before letting her arms fall. No, let him hug her instead.
“Hi, Sean,” she said. Why couldn’t she ever run into him when she was well-gr
oomed and hot?
He didn’t hug her. Instead, he sprawled out on the bench she’d vacated and patted the seat beside him. “Sit down. Long time, no see, huh?” She sat, perched primly on the edge of her seat, and tried to work up the courage to finally ask him out and be done with it. Their thighs touched, and she could feel the spot burning. She knew her face was crimson, and she couldn’t seem to get a grip.
“So how was your summer?” he said.
“Fine, I guess. I spent it working, mostly. What about you?”
“I had an excellent summer! We were in Texas visiting my Aunt Marina’s ranch. We went horseback riding and swimming, and I had a J-O-B too, of course, but that wasn’t the excellent part.”
“You spent the summer in Texas?” No wonder she hadn’t spotted him on her endless lonely drives around Kamata. All those wasted hours searching for him…
“Yep. We had a family reunion, and everyone brought their kids and we had a blast.”
“Oh. That sounds like fun,” she said, grinning inanely. Think of something to say you moron! “Um, where’d you work at?” she finally said.
“Pizza delivery, of course,” he said, kicking her shoe playfully. “Terrible pay, but at least you get to leave the store and listen to your own music on runs. And I got lots of exercise. Where’d you work?”
She grimaced. “You want fries with that? Ugh.”
“That’s better than my brother. He cleaned—”
“Sean? Honey? Do you have our checkbook?” Millicent called from her place in line.
He jumped up and searched his pockets. He pulled it out of his back pocket, and his face split into a huge grin. “Excuse me, Ruby,” he said, before jogging it over to her. When he reached her, they kissed, and he grabbed Millicent’s butt and held on, leaving no doubt as to just how intimate they were.
He walked back over to her like nothing had changed, when everything had, and she snapped, “Is that your girlfriend?”
“She’s my fiancée, actually. I’ll have to introduce you two.”
Drawn To You: A Psychological thriller Page 5
