"That doesn't sound so bad. Why did you stop seeing him?"
"He was only offering a short-term arrangement. Basically, a few fancy dates a month. I was looking for a real long-term arrangement. I loved that taste of the fancy side of life. I was hooked and a few dates a month weren't enough. I was really lucky he was my first one, though. We understood we couldn't give one another what we wanted and we ended on great terms. I was scared to ask for all I wanted and needed. He taught me that it was okay to do that. Hell, it was the reason the site existed. So, with his encouragement, I updated my profile and poured my heart into it."
"Wow. So, that's how you met Michael."
"I wish. I went through plenty of duds first, but those are stories for another time. There are a lot of liars out there and few freaks."
The vibration between them startled both girls into separating. It took a second for the realization to dawn. Bri began patting the bed to feel for the phone that must have slipped from the pocket of her baggy sweatpants. She kept an alarm set so that she could call and say goodnight to Michael. It began on show nights as a way for him to know she was home safe from any late performances. Once their relationship developed, he liked the idea of being the last voice she heard before going to sleep and knowing that she was safe in bed for the night. It also became one of their first official rules. He loved the idea of those. The goodnight ritual was both reasonable and practical, so Brianna didn't offer much pushback, but she was still nineteen. She got forgetful and sometimes obstinate. Michael had zero compunction doling out consistent hand to butt reminders.
"Birth control alarm?" Keila laughed and wiggled her eyebrows.
"No! What is this, 1980? I take the shot every three months. It's my alarm to call Michael and say goodnight."
"Oh, go ahead. We can chat another time."
Bri pulled her back as she began to scoot off the bed. "No. I'm not tired. I'm not going to bed and I want to finish our conversation. I'll text him."
Bri: Hi.
Michael: Why are you texting?
Bri: Don't be cross. I had an emergency with a resident and I'm still down at security.
Michael: What happened? Are you all right?
Bri: Yes, I'm fine. I just can't talk right now.
Michael: How much later will it be?
Bri: I don't know. I should go.
Michael: Brianna, you're being dismissive.
Bri: Sorry. Can we talk about it tomorrow?
Michael: I'd prefer a callback tonight.
Bri: Early class in the morning, remember?
Michael: Brianna...
Bri: I'll try. I love you.
Michael: Love you more.
Brianna stared at her phone on the bed. She would need to double down on her lie when they talked in the morning, maybe add in some fighting and city police. Michael was not a fan of being blown off. She didn't mean to be curt, but even loving him and their relationship didn't mean that she didn't want some freedom to say no. That was something they had to work on. Michael wasn't a fan of hearing no, especially without cause. Brianna, on the other hand, sometimes did it just because she liked to remind him that the choice was always hers. He called it manipulative. She saw it a little differently. It was one of the biggest hurdles they were still working through. When she wanted to outright break a rule, her RA job was an easy scapegoat.
"What'd he say?" Keila had gotten comfortable again.
"That he loved me."
"Your thumbs were flying pretty fast for three words."
"He wanted me to call, and I told him that I was having a resident crisis. I'm a lousy liar when it comes to him, and he would hear it in my voice. So, I just told him we would talk tomorrow."
"Bold!"
"Why do you say that?"
Keila slid from the bed and walked over to the desk. Picking up the papers she turned over earlier, without looking at them, she waved them at the bug-eyed girl watching her.
"A man I thought was a dad, who isn't, and who makes you do this is why I say that lying was bold. You sure he's not the type to drive over here."
"No! No. He's never done anything like that. I'm good for tonight."
"If you say so. Again, I wouldn't know. I don't have a dad or a boyfriend to compare him to, so if you say you're good, you're good. Back to it."
Chapter 4
"Okay, so after the duds, I get a message from this man. It is incredibly polite and he simply invites me to dinner. He said he wasn't much into texting or sitting on the phone. He preferred to look into someone's eyes. It wasn't even a fancy place. We went to Maggiano's, right off campus. He asked me to pick, so I would be comfortable."
"At first, I wanted to take the bus or a cab, but he insisted on sending a car for me. I was shocked. Something about his eyes and how thoughtful he was had me more nervous than I had been on any of my past dates. He clearly had a lot of money. It's sort of the point of the site. These men are beyond earning a decent salary. But, none of his pictures were overly showy. You know, he wasn't standing in front of his yacht or anything else equally douche. Believe me, some of these men were worse than the boys here in college."
"He has a yacht?" Keila was jaw dropped and sitting straight up.
"That was your big take away. No. I'm being facetious. A lot of the men want you to see their wealth. I don't know, something about that cheapened it for me. All of Michael's pictures were real. He was with friends and family and doing stuff. Anyway, I followed all of the tips for a first date. I kept my makeup simple, my hair was pulled up in a ponytail with spiral curls, and I put on a simple black shell dress with a lace overlay. I also wore flats. I wore heels on one date and the guy had exaggerated his height, by a lot, and I ended up towering over him. We both left that date with regrets."
"My only jewelry was my class ring and some tiny, if you squinted you could tell, diamond earrings. I got downstairs, with five minutes to spare. I really wanted to pace in the fresh air and clear my head, but no deal. The car was already there. I stepped from the door and the driver was out in a flash. He says, very seriously, 'Ms. Anderson?' I confirmed my identity for him and off we went. Even taking the long way, it only took us ten minutes to get there. Michael was waiting out front for me."
"He was wearing dark jeans, a black button-down dress shirt, and a black blazer. Jesus, I almost swooned out loud. This was not a situation where I was pulling off being cool at all. So, the driver comes around to open my door, and as I turn to step out, it's Michael who reaches for my hand. How I didn't pass out right there, I don't know."
"I'm about to pass out just hearing about it."
Keila had gotten comfortable again and was lying down, listening to Bri's account like a bedtime story up to this point, but she bounced up during this part and put all of her focus on her friend. She hoped she was getting to the juicy part.
"His hand swallowed mine. I'm no little flower, but Michael is—"
"He's huge."
"Yeah. Anyway, his hair was cut pretty much the same as you saw it today, with a little less on the sides, thick, wavy, and shiny, just begging for my fingers to run through it. He had just enough scruff and light freckles across his nose, like he'd gotten too much sun."
"You could tell all of this under a street light?"
"No. Once we got inside and to our table. Believe me, I don't remember anything about the first ten minutes of our conversation. I was drinking in every detail. Plus, I was trying to think clearly about all of the sugar 101 stuff that I needed to remember."
"What's sugar 101?"
"Right. I skipped a step. So, when a man is willing to support the woman he's seeing with money or gifts, he's considered her sugar daddy. In turn, that woman becomes his sugar baby."
Keila slapped her hands down on the bed and then thumped herself on the forehead. "That's why, when I asked if he was your dad, you hedged. Do you call him Daddy?"
"Keila!"
"You're right, too soon for the super personal questions
. But, I get to come back to that one."
Brianna grabbed the stuffed bear that was propped up behind her and bopped her nosey friend on the head. They both collapsed into laughter. In between outbursts, Bri suddenly said, "Thank you."
This time with Keila was the freest she'd been with someone her own age since she and Michael had gotten serious. Worried about having to explain who he was and the why and how of their relationship, Bri had become the nun of her class. She didn't want to give up time with Michael, but she didn't feel comfortable to make him a part of her campus life, either. On the rare occasion that she did the whole college thing, she did it solo. All of her friends in the theatre program just believed her to be too focused to spend much time partying and hooking up. As much as she was comfortable in her relationship, she knew as long as she had the word teen attached to her age, people would be creeped out by it. People would assume, like Keila had, that he was her dad. Too much time together and they'd start to think she and her dad had a highly inappropriate relationship. Bri balanced on a tightrope between her two lives.
Again, there was a shift. The tears that slipped into her mouth carried a taste of bittersweet sadness. She missed having a best friend. Really, there hadn't been one since she left home. Her closest friend back then was Molly. They would stay up late at night, at sleepovers, and talk about the men they wanted to marry, the dreams they hoped to fulfill, the kind of home they might have. It was all silly kid stuff. At least, it was for Bri. For Molly, it was a future she actively worked toward, and the summer they graduated was the summer Molly got married. Oh, Bri had tried to dissuade her, but as Molly told her, they had very different dreams. That first year at school, she really missed her friend. She had hopes that getting back together with her, that first summer home, would be like old times, but it was never the same. Everything she wanted to do seemed silly to do with a pregnant, married woman. Bri understood then that even if the entire town threw her a parade and welcomed her home with open arms, she would still just be an outsider. She had completely outgrown Pointe Ridge, Iowa.
"Bri? What's wrong? I didn't mean to make it weird. I'm sorry."
"No, no. Don't apologize. I'm happy. This just reminded me that it's been too long since I had a completely honest conversation with someone other than Michael and especially a girlfriend. I'm being silly, I know it, but I can't help it. I guess I emotionally ambushed myself."
Looking around for tissues, Keila went to the dresser and grabbed a handful.
"Here. Blow. I don't know what made you pick me, but I'm glad you did. You really can trust me, Bri. I might ask a thousand ridiculous questions, but I would never betray your trust."
"Good, because I like remembering my first time meeting Michael, and there's more."
"More than hot guy sends a car for you and shows up looking like a million bucks? Oh, and apparently, he's also worth a million bucks."
"Give or take a buck." Bri tossed her gross, used tissues and grabbed two bottles of water. "Here. You could probably use this more than another Pepsi."
"You were so made for this job. You're such a mom."
"Yeah, well, a mom wouldn't have had the shameful lusty thoughts I had at that first dinner."
Keila got comfortable again and settled in for the rest of the story. "Go on."
"Like I said, I had been on a couple of dates, so my expectation for a nice restaurant and meal were a given. What was completely unexpected was the obvious planning he had put into the date. Keila, he arranged for us to eat at the chef's table. We were in the kitchen at a beautifully set table and we didn't even get menus. The chef just kept coming over with special dishes. I wasn't sure who was making the decisions on what we were served, but everything was splendid. That's where Michael first showed a little, I don't know what you would call it, take charge personality."
"Where he first showed it? I don't have many men in my life, but it seems like he was showing that from the first time you spoke, but go ahead."
"He thought I was being coy or a typical girl fixated on my weight and not eating because I was a dancer and all. I wasn't, though. Everything was new and had such fancy plating. I love Italian food, but I didn't recognize most of it. I must have frowned my face up one time too many, because he basically told me to knock it off and behave like the young woman I led him to believe I was in our chats."
Brianna went on to imitate Michael's voice and behavior that night. Sitting up straight, she took both of Keila's hands and, pulling her closer, looked directly into her eyes the way he'd done to her on that first date.
"Brianna, I understand this is a new experience for you, but I hope to share many more just like it and I have an expectation of mature acceptance and engagement. Now, less frowning and more tasting."
Keila didn't even let her hands go when the imitation was done. If reliving it was intense, she couldn't fathom what it must've been like at that moment. Brianna finally dropped her hands and went back to speaking in her regular voice.
"So, what did you do?"
"What do you think? I smiled, I said 'yes sir,' and I ate fantastic food for the next two hours. Everything was delicious and I guess my nerves and my lust got all jumbled up and had me acting weird. He was very forgiving and managed to put me more at ease than I could ever remember being on one of those dates, even after his semi-stern talk. That night, like every night since, listening to Michael, in the end, works out for my benefit."
Keila's head was swimming with questions, excitement, and yeah, mostly questions. All of them were so inappropriate she kept her eyes on the bedspread. She glanced up slightly and bit her bottom lip in a complete circle, before ending up with the right corner sucked all the way in.
"Just spit it out." Bri knew her friend had an awkward question trapped in her mouth.
"What? Okay, okay. I know it's none of my business, but did you sleep with him that night?"
"No, of course not. He's way more uptight than that. It was over six months before we slept together, and I was pushing for it more than he was.
"I would think that most men would be extremely flattered by a young college girl throwing themselves at them. Yeah, definitely different than guys around here. They can barely wait six hours."
"There was no throwing, girly. He went from a mere potential to someone I was falling in love with." Bri could see the doubt in her friend's eyes.
"I know it was quick and it had a lot to do with how attractive I found him, but he did—he does—the one thing most important to me, Keila. Michael takes care of me. Sure, I could do these things alone, but it's just better with him than it ever was without him. All of the things I talked about with Molly were coming to pass with Michael. Those things and things I didn't even know or dare dream about. It's hard to explain."
Keila physically swooned, sliding down the wall and nearly off the bed. At first, Brianna starred, and then she couldn't contain herself and the giggles that burst forth were contagious. Both girls ended up on the floor in front of the dorm bunk. As they pulled themselves together, they were head to head, leaning on each other.
"So, I guess you're done laughing at me?"
Brianna nudged her shoulder once more. "Yeah, I guess, but only if you're done sliding down my bed like some giddy teenager reading a cheesy romance."
"I am a giddy teenager, and you're giving me real-life romance, so no chance of that happening. I won't pretend to understand, well, any of it, but, girl, it's working for you. Look around. You have the best dorm room on the floor. I can't prove it, but I'm willing to bet the best in the building. I'm surprised he hasn't moved your own furniture in."
"Only because I convinced him it would get me fired. You've seen how big he is, right? He finds the idea of a twin-size bed ridiculous."
"Well, what the heck did he sleep on in college?"
"Probably the same thing, but as he likes to remind me, constantly, things change," Brianna said.
"No kidding. This story has changed me forever." Keila fan
ned at her face like the thought of everything Bri had just shared with her was heating her up from the inside.
Brianna was on her feet and at her desk, tucking her papers into the cramped top drawer. She didn't want to make eye contact with Keila for fear of what she'd see in her eyes, again. Her eyes started to fill with tears that she refused to let fall. Doing her best to suck in large gulps of nerve settling air, without making a sound, she didn't speak again until she was sure her voice wouldn't waver.
"Thanks for keeping half of those cheesecake calories off my butt. You should probably go now. I have an early morning rehearsal before class." Brianna remained turned away.
Keila wasn't sure what had happened. They went from laughing themselves into tears to this weird bum's rush she was getting.
"Hey, I know it's late and you have rehearsal, but you kind of shut down on me, just now. Did I do or say something stupid or mean again, without realizing it?" Standing next to her friend, Keila was hurt when Brianna moved her body away.
"No. I talk too much, that's all."
"I don't understand. I don't know what I said. I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry, okay. I never meant to hurt your feelings. You have to believe me."
"It's not you. I'm just realizing that things between us have changed. Of course, hearing this story changed you. When you settle down in your bed tonight, your last thoughts won't be of fancy dorm rooms or expensive dinners. It won't even be about stumbling onto the fact that my boyfriend made me write out a punishment. You're just going to have this tiny thought in your head that the girl you thought you knew has been keeping this whole secret life from you. That I'm trading sex for money. You won't look at me the same, that's for sure. No matter what you think or will think when things get quiet, I hope you believe me when I tell you that I love Michael. I love Michael Somerville. The money was the reason when we met, but it has nothing to do with why I stay. I can't lose him, Keila. Please promise me you won't tell anyone my secret."
The Daddy Arrangement (Sugar 101) Page 4
