“Nothing,” I answered. He got them off then grabbed my shoes. “I can do that bit,” I claimed.
“I’m already down here,” he said as he put them on. I felt like Cinderella with Laurie as my prince, putting on my golden slippers. God, it would be easy to fall for him, I thought. Half the world was in love with him and it was obvious why.
We ate dinner from the kiosk. Hotdogs and hot chips and soda. When he asked if he should take me home I said no.
“Where do you wanna go?” he asked.
“Your place,” I said, trying not to be overcome by shyness.
“Oh, I see what you’re saying. You want to take advantage of me, is that it?” he teased.
“Maybe,” I answered.
“My house it is.”
We drove to his apartment. It was completely dark. He unlocked the door and reached in to turn the entryway light on. We went inside and he locked the door behind us. “Do you want a drink or anything?”
“No,” I answered. He smiled at me, knowingly, and took my hand, leading me up the stairs.
It was dark at the top of the stairs but he pulled me toward his room. He walked in and turned on the lamp beside his bed. I followed him in, looking out at the lights of the city. It was just the same as the last time. I slipped off my heels, keeping them in my hand.
“So, what do you want to do?” he asked. I kept my gaze on the city. I felt him come up behind me. His hand grazed the lace at the bottom of my dress. “Jenga?” he asked, his tone playful.
I turned around ready to say, ‘Jenga? Are you fucking serious?’ but he caught my lips before I could say a thing. He kissed me deeply this time, his tongue probing, his arms wrapping around me to bring me close. I dropped the shoes, but I wish I hadn’t taken them off. I couldn’t get close enough to him.
He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around him, anchoring myself. He broke away from me for a second to lay me down. He took off his jacket as I swiftly unbuttoned his shirt. They both fell away as he came back down to me. I ran my hands over his back, and his chest, following the dark lines of his tattoos.
He ran his hands up my legs, pushing my dress up but it was tight and fitted, it wouldn’t go very far. “Wait,” I said, as I pushed him off a little.
He lifted his hands away. “What’s wrong?”
I turned over and gestured to the zip in the middle of my back. “Unzip,” I said.
He pulled down the zip, pushed the dress down past my shoulders, releasing my arms and I helped him get it down my hips and off me. You couldn’t wear a bra in that dress. He looked down at me, taking me in for a second. He ran his hand up my stomach and grazed my nipple. The sensation skated down my skin. He licked his lips and moved toward my chest, capturing my nipple, licking and sucking at it. His other hand grabbed me, gently, squeezing before moving back down my stomach.
“Jesus,” he said, feeling my underwear, soaked through.
I wanted to be embarrassed but my body wouldn’t let me. I writhed against his fingers and pulled his lips back to me. I tasted and sucked and bit and pulled but it wasn’t enough.
I broke away to grab at his jeans. I rubbed the length of him through the denim as he bucked against my hand. It wasn’t enough. I unbuckled his belt and tried to unbutton his jeans. My hands were shaking. I was nervous. He could feel it. He undid them himself and kicked them away. He looked at me a second, slowing us to a stop. He rubbed the pad of his thumb against my cheek.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked.
Whatever it was between us, it felt fragile and so easily lost or broken. I wasn’t sure what we were, if he was seeing other girls or if he liked me as much as I liked him. But I still wanted it. “Yes,” I assured him. He reached over to his nightstand, opening it up and pulling out a condom. He made quick work to get it on and I admired him as he did. Cole had been of average size. I never felt any desire to look at him for longer than a few seconds. Laurie was something to behold. He was beautiful. Long and thick and beautiful. He caught me looking and smiled. I bit my lip and lowered my eyes, embarrassed. My stomach was a pit of nerves. He licked my lips to open them back up and kissed me.
He slipped his fingers into my underwear and pulled them off me, settling back between my legs and lining himself up. I sucked in a breath in anticipation. He ran himself up and down, soaking himself in me. “Fuck…” I let out as I shifted my hips up and took him in. He rubbed his forehead into my shoulder, gripping my hips tightly. We stayed there, still for just a moment, it was torture. Delicious torture. When I couldn’t wait a moment longer, I shifted again. Laurie took it as a cue and started moving. He pushed deeper into me and I moaned.
He kissed me again, forcing his tongue into my mouth and playing with mine. I gripped his neck, slick with sweat, and looked into his eyes as he moved over me. He moved harder, his arms forced themselves under my back and brought me up a little higher. I let go of his neck and grabbed on to the dark timber panel on the headboard.
“Shaw…” Laurie said. Was it a question? I could barely think much less answer. All I could focus on was the pleasure.
He shifted us again, so we were sitting, our legs folded tightly, uncomfortably beneath us. He was growing bigger inside me. “Not yet,” I begged.
I tried to draw him in further, sucking in the air, as if it would help. I rotated my hips, and brought my hand down between us but his had beaten me to it. He fingers found my clit and worked desperately to give it to me, the thing I’d been craving for so long. That no one had ever given me but me. And, it never felt like this. He pressed down on me, rubbing fiercely.
There was a quick second of pain. And then I was coming, tightening around Laurie, giving him permission. His fingers stilled but kept thrusting until he came hard and fast inside me. His one arm kept me against him as he caught his breath. When he couldn’t keep us up any longer, he moved us both to lie down.
He took care of the condom and pulled me back to him. Our breathing was so loud, so laboured. I lay on his chest, feeling it rise and fall. He held my hand on his stomach. We didn’t speak, just kept breathing, until we both fell asleep.
* * *
Laurie had to fly to Vegas for an event, so he had to leave early the next morning. He kissed me sweetly as I woke up and told me he’d see me when I came back from New York. Leif came to get me to take me home.
“There are photographers on the street,” he told me as we walked to the car. “You might want to sit in the back.”
I had taken to sitting in the front beside him, but the back was tinted.
He was right. We drove past a row of photographers, taking photos even though I knew they couldn’t see me.
When I got home, I immediately took out a notebook and started writing. I couldn’t help myself. I wrote down all the little pieces that felt important. Maybe they’d turn into a song one day. With the help of Teddy, of course. The thought of him made me realise that he might be willing to go to New York with me. I called to ask but it was too last minute, and he was all scheduled to write for another singer.
Leif drove me to the airport on Friday morning. He tried to distract me by talking the whole journey. As he helped get my luggage onto my trolley, a photographer came up and put his camera in my face. “Are you and Laurie Siler together?” he asked. No ‘hello’ or ‘how are you’. I furrowed my brows and tried to look him in the eyes, but the camera was attached to his face. “Is he cheating on Angela Ritter with you?”
Leif pulled me behind him and guided me into the airport, protecting me. “Don’t listen to them,” he said. Airport security helped block them as I checked in. I hugged Leif goodbye and walked to the lounge.
I went to have a drink to calm my nerves. After a glass of red wine and two chapters of a bestseller I bought at an airport bookstore, I still had 20 minutes until my flight. I couldn’t help myself. I googled her. Angela Ritter. According to the Internet, they’d been dating for five months. They’d never confirmed anything. But the
re were pictures. She was beautiful. A Victoria’s Secret model, of course she was beautiful. And, she was older. 26. She had big lips and a voluptuous body. Dripping with sex appeal. I didn’t blame her, but she made me feel totally inadequate. I ordered a vodka soda and sculled it before boarding.
The alcohol and the fixation on Angela Ritter helped to distract me as I stepped onto the plane. The novelty of first class was another helpful distraction. But nothing helped as the plane pulled away from the gate and readied for take-off. I put on noise cancelling headphones and closed my eyes. My heart was beating fast and my mouth became dry. I felt like I could smell that same metallic smell. I felt like I could feel the blood dripping down my head and down the back of my shirt. I could hear the screaming over the music. I reached for the volume control and turned it all the way up, but I could still hear it. I knew it wasn’t real, but I was terrified. I thought the feeling wasn’t going to go away. The screaming and the smell. That it would last all 5 and a half hours. My heart beat so fast I worried it would tire and stop altogether.
But then it slowed. The smell faded, as did the screams. I kept my eyes closed. The flight attendants must have thought I was asleep because no one bothered me. I opened my eyes to watch us land. I felt a mountain of relief as we sailed smoothly down into JFK Airport. My hands were still shaking as I collected my luggage. I felt mentally exhausted. A couple of young girls recognised me and asked for photos. I hoped I looked okay. I hoped they couldn’t smell the alcohol on me.
Manny had a car waiting for me at pick up. The New York skyline was just as I had imagined. The Chrysler building and the Empire State Building stood tall and familiar. The car moved slowly through the city. New York traffic was just as I imagined, too. But it gave me opportunity to look at the city. Like Los Angeles, I had watched so much film and television set in New York City. While Los Angeles was similar to Sydney, New York was like nowhere I’d ever been. It felt so much more alive than anywhere else.
I listened to the honking traffic, and the drilling of the street workers, a busker playing a guitar on a stoop, and a woman shouting out sales prices for the boutique behind her. It all made me smile. It felt like I was being welcomed.
Seven
I was staying at the St. Regis, just down the street from the NBC Studios where Jimmy Fallon recorded his shows. We pulled up to the old world French style building with red carpeted stairs and a row of flags hanging over them.
A woman who introduced herself as Kendall, my butler, guided me from my car to the room and advised that my bags were soon to follow. I didn’t even have to check in. She offered to unpack my things, but I told her I could manage. She advised me to call her if I required anything at all and then left me alone to admire the room.
It was much more than a room. It had Tiffany blue walls with silver accents and an array of white flowers all over the glamorously decorated space. There was a bedroom, a living room, a dining room, a gigantic marble bathroom and all of them with chandeliers hanging from the ceilings. A sweet smell came from a grand fruit bowl on the entryway table with a bottle of expensive looking champagne beside it.
I was about to take a bite out of a shiny red apple when the doorbell rang. I opened it quickly, thoughtlessly. The apple fell from my hand as Laurie picked me up in a hug.
“What are you doing here?” I asked as he set me down, my heart beating fast at the surprise and how damn good it felt to be in his arms at that moment.
“What do you think?” he asked and then kissed me. He closed the door behind us and moved us around so my back was against it. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he pushed his body against mine. He was wearing some kind of cologne. Something subtle but warm. It was making my head fuzzy.
“That’s so sweet,” I said as we broke our kiss. I looked into his forest green eyes and smiled. He smiled back at me and then ducked down a little to kiss my neck.
“I needed an excuse to visit New York. This is nice,” he said, pulling back from me and moving through the suite.
“I am so glad you’re here,” I said, following behind him, my hands gripping his shirt. “Where are you staying?”
“I’ve got a few friends who live here. They’d put me up. But, I’d like to stay with you,” he said, turning to look at me, a little unsure.
“Of course,” I answered. I didn’t want him going anywhere.
We had curled up on the lounge and Laurie was telling me about Vegas when Kendall had both our bags delivered.
“Your driver will be back at two to take you to the show,” she confirmed before she left.
“Will you come with me? To the show?” I asked Laurie.
“Oh… I don’t know,” he said, shifting a little on the lounge. I realised he must be thinking of what it would look like to others. Which made me think of Angela Ritter. I untangled myself from him and stood up. “We can hang out after? We can go to dinner with a few of my friends, if you’d like?” he offered. “I’d love them to meet you.”
“Can I ask you something?” I didn’t want to sound like I was jealous, even though I definitely was. I knew I didn’t have any right to be. But I had to know.
“Sure,” he answered, curious.
“Are you dating anyone else right now?” He furrowed his eyebrows. “You have every right to. I know we’re not exclusive or anything. It’s just that this morning some guy was screaming in my face that I was a homewrecker and I…”
He stood up. “Who? A pap?” I nodded. “What a prick.”
I’d never heard him swear before. I looked at him questioningly, he hadn’t answered me yet.
“No, I’m not dating anyone else,” he answered. There was something in his expression that made me think that wasn’t the full story.
“Are you…” I didn’t know how to phrase it.
“I was sleeping with a girl. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks,” he guessed my question. I nodded, assuming he was referring to Angela Ritter.
“Are you?” he asked, there was a hard edge to his expression in that moment. A little nervousness.
“No,” I answered, too quickly.
He smiled wide, pleased to hear. “You know what, fuck it. I’ll come.”
“Really?”
“Yeah,” he said. I grabbed his jaw and kissed him, grateful. He wrapped his arms around me, running his hands down my ass. “How long do we have?” he asked.
I looked at my watch. “I could really use a shower,” I said.
“Oh, okay.” He let me go.
I kept hold of him and sniffed his neck. “You could use one, too.”
He took the hint, threw off his shirt and started kissing me again. We fumbled our clothes off as we made out all the way to the bathroom. “Nice,” Laurie said, as I let go of him to turn on the water.
We stepped in, behind the frosted glass, into the already steamy space. He put me against the wall, rubbing his fingers all over me, worshipping me with his hands. I watched him lengthening and hardening. “Wait, condom,” I reminded him, before I lost all mental faculties.
“Right,” he said, remembering. “Two seconds.” He ran out of the room. I stood under the showerhead and turned the tap, letting the water get hotter and hotter. I leaned against the shower wall to let it run down my back, beating out the knots at the base of my spine, getting more and more turned on at the thought of what was to come.
Suddenly, Laurie was there. One hand on my waist and the other between my legs. My body moved back to him and my head rolled forward as he brought his fingers back to me. I reached back and felt him ready in my hand. “Shaw?” he asked.
“Yeah?” I said.
“I need you right now,” he said, pushing against my ass. I nodded, needing him too, my head against the cool tile. He lined himself up and pushed into me, so slowly.
“Fuck,” he let out, softly. I bit my lip to keep from making a sound, wanting to hear him.
I moved against him, my head falling down further along the shower wall. The water ke
pt beating against my back. My body was so hot all over. It felt like my skin was pulsing.
Laurie reached under me and pulled me up against his body, the new angle making me cry out as he kept moving in me. He rubbed my chest, squeezing my breasts and holding me tightly. I turned my head to kiss him, feeling his tongue touch mine, just softly.
The sensation was building, I started feeling weak. I couldn’t hold myself up, and Laurie couldn’t hold me either. I fell forward again, resting on the cool tile as Laurie moved faster in me. My orgasm caught me by surprise. I came loudly and quickly, moaning against the cold tile, and Laurie followed behind me.
I lazily stood up and turned around. I put my arms around him and held on as we gathered ourselves. He moved my hair away from my ear and leaned in to whisper. “You’re amazing.”
I shook my head, bashfully, against his chest. He pushed my hair away from my face, forcing me to look at him. He looked down at me, tenderly, before kissing me again. He pressed his hands to my forehead. “You’re boiling,” he said, before turning down the heat.
As the water turned cool we washed each other off, slowly and tenderly, taking care of each other, and finally got out.
We got ready beside each other. It was blissfully domestic. I put on the slightest bit of makeup. The hair and makeup artist were supposed to meet me at the studio. I worked to blast my hair with a dryer while Laurie just brushed his hair back a few times with his hands and it was miraculously dry. He dressed and then watched me do the same, into the outfit Ari had designated for the journey. The actual performance outfit was in a garment bag: dress, shoes and jewellery.
Soon enough Kendall came to escort us to our car, with a bellman to carry my guitar and the garment bag. Kendall paid a lot of attention to Laurie. He was extra friendly back. I tried not to be bothered by it.
I started becoming nervous again on the drive over. It was only a couple blocks, but it felt like longer. There was a crowd waiting at the backdoor, they screamed for Laurie and me. I was too nervous to talk, or take any photos, so I went straight through. Laurie stayed and signed and took photos.
Bright Lights: Book One of the Talia Shaw Series Page 11
