Holding her foundation, she wanted to hide the bruises, but last time she’d pulled out her makeup, Ed had walked in and gently wiped it away.
At first she thought he didn’t want her dressing up for his team, until he explained, “These are your scars of battle, never try and hide your bruises—at least not from me. They show you survived.”
“But they’re so ugly.”
“What they did to you was ugly. Surviving that and living your life, that’s what’s beautiful.”
It was one of the rare times he allowed her to see the man within the soldier—and she fell a little more in love.
Anastacia heard the front door open, but for the first time Ed didn’t come and find her; make sure the military nurse had been or ask her how many bandages had been removed today. Instead, he went straight into the front bedroom, closed the door and she couldn’t even hear muffled voices through the walls.
She stood, watching for the door to open, not knowing what reaction to expect from either Ed or her father after seeing the video. Part of her knew it had been a cowards’ approach to ask Bella to show them, but it would have been impossible to explain how the man she had married against her father’s approval could be so depraved and cruel. It was hard enough to watch her father’s face while he listened to all her old breaks being described in dispassionate detail by the doctor. She could only hope that Bella was able to explain why she’d kept the social media account open and hope they believed her about the account and the video. They had to believe the woman on the video was someone else—she would never have done any of those things with her ex. Most required a level of trust that they’d never shared.
“See you tomorrow then,” Jax’ voice became clear as the door opened. “I’ll get the guys together and we’ll have options for you to consider.”
“If you need extra time to drop into the base and confirm any logistics …” Ed sounded formal but strangely deferential.
Jax looked over to her before responding, “Can you handle things here on your own until after ten?”
“I’ll manage. Are you sure there’s nothing for me to be concerned about?”
“I’ve run every plate twice and the facial recognition software hasn’t thrown up any triggers.”
“Then, take your time and get it right. We’ve only got one shot at this.”
“Roger that, sir. See you tomorrow, Ms Vaughan.”
By the time Jax left, Anastacia hobbled back into the kitchen, deciding to make Ed a coffee, hoping he couldn’t yell at her while she was frothing hot milk.
“See you, Jax.”
The sound of the coffee beans grinding muted the sound of Ed coming into the kitchen and she jumped at his touch, even though it was only his strong arms wrapping around her. “I don’t want coffee,” he said, stroking her hair. He hadn’t touched her this way since that first day on the couch when she was crying about the taxi driver. Gentle, calming strokes.
“What do you want?”
The slight pause felt as if it lasted for hours before he turned her around until she couldn’t avoid his eyes, “You.”
She lifted her chin for kisses, instead he gently removed wayward strands of hair from her face. “We don’t have to do this, not if you’re not ready,” he assured her.
“I’ve never wanted anything more.” Not wanting to wait any longer or risk Ed changing his mind, she reached up until his lips took away all bad memories and refilled her heart with hope.
One by one, he gently kissed her bruises and remaining bandages. So softly that she could barely feel his skin for his hot breath. Only when he touched the cut on her cheek that refused to heal did she wince. “Babe, we can stop at any time.”
“I don’t want you to stop,” she moaned, turning her lips to meet his, again.
Her hands felt their way up, underneath his shirt. Finally free to feel the muscles that had been calling her name since the night at the ball she was eager to see with her hands, but the moment she tried to go lower, Ed lifted her into his arms, carried her through to his bedroom before gently laying her down on his dark bedspread.
It was the only room in his home that she’d never seen before. Sparse of furniture, she didn’t expect to see an old teddy bear sitting in a chair in the corner—something to ask him about later.
All thoughts disappeared as he lifted her jumper—she’d pulled it out of his laundry hamper just so she could be comforted by his scent all day. “It’s about time I took this back!” Smiling, he kissed each bruise as it became exposed, looking for her reaction as he kissed the strapping still over the stab wound. “If anything hurts, you need to tell me so we can stop.”
“What if I don’t want to stop?” It had taken days to get him alone like this, she couldn’t let him leave her now.
“Babe, I promise you, we aren’t stopping unless you change your mind. But if it hurts, we find another way.”
She leaned up so he could pull his jumper over her head, wanting and needing him to see her as a woman and not as his client.
“Fuck, you are beautiful,” he moaned, teasing her breasts with kisses. “Promise, you’ll let me know if it hurts.”
“It only hurts when you stop.”
With all her strength, she pulled him to her, opening her legs and making room until he ground against her. All the time, his hands caressed and lips made her body his own, until she forced his head higher.
“Please?”
His eyes sought confirmation. “Please,” she said again. This time, he allowed her to undo his belt, but when she struggled with the zipper, he stopped his kisses until it was just their naked bodies on the bed.
“You are so beautiful,” he murmured. She shivered under his gaze.
“I could say the same thing about you.” Again, her legs interlocked around him. “Now.” This time, it wasn’t a question.
Slowly, carefully, he entered her, and she felt all her demons being cast aside. It hurt to move with him, as much as she wanted her hips to rise, she couldn’t bite down on the pain.
“Babe, lie back and let me do all the work.” He pulled out enough to allow his fingers access bringing her to the brink; edging her until she cried out.
“Now, damn it, now!”
Eyes staring into hers, Anastacia held still, willing her body to take all of Ed as he thrust. All she wanted was to drown in him, with him, give herself completely to this man. Never had she felt so loved, or satisfied in giving her love, as Ed’s final thrust before he collapsed beside her, spent.
Anastacia woke with her body cradled in Ed’s arms after her first night in months without nightmares of her ex-husband or the attack. Legs still intertwined, her slight stretch woke Ed before she could marvel at his naked body beside her.
“Shh,” she said, lightly touching her fingers to his lips. “I just want to look.”
Only her fingers wanted to do more than look, tracing down his tanned chest to the tan line of where his shorts should be. “How much do you work out?”
“Usually, every day—but I love rock climbing. Getting away to the mountains and it’s just my body and the mountain. If I’ve been away on tour, I always know if I’ve let my fitness die down based on some of my regular climbs.”
“I’ve never tried rock climbing.”
“I don’t think it would be your scene—no room for cocktails in your backpack, princess,” he teased.
“I’ll have to swap out the water in my water bottle, then,” she joked. Truly, she’d never even thought about rock climbing, but with Ed—anything was possible.
“How about you have a shower while I make us some breakfast.”
“How long ‘til the guys arrive?”
“About an hour, and as much as I’d like to continue our conversation.” He stroked her leg, “We have a lot of other things to talk about before they get here.”
“About?” she hesitated to ask.
Instead, Ed kissed her lightly on the cheek, “Have a shower, princess.”
/> By the time she came out, her hair was still dripping wet. Not that she wanted to explain how much energy it took to towel dry her hair, but Ed didn’t need explanations. With one look, he left the breakfast plates and got her towel. “Let me.” Gently, he massaged her scalp, careful of avoiding the cuts. Drying the long strands of hair without pulling and without pain.
“Thank you.”
“At least if you don’t like breakfast, I’ll blame it on it getting cold.”
“There is that,” she smiled, leaning up to kiss his cheek, only for him to turn and greet her lips with his.
“Fuck, babe,” he sighed as they broke apart.
“There is that,” she teased. One phrase could mean so much.
“Eat your eggs,” Ed set her up on the couch, plate in her lap.
“You saw the video?” Someone had to break the ice about yesterday, and as much as she didn’t want to talk about it, she wanted Ed to be all talked out by the time his team returned.
“Yep. Your father only saw the beginning.”
“I’m so sorry,” she cried, mortified at her father’s reaction.
“He knew immediately it wasn’t you. By the way, so did I. The way the woman on the video held herself—she didn’t have your grace.”
“I don’t think most people will be looking at her lack of grace.”
“You did the right thing in showing us. I’ve already handed it over to my team and hopefully it will be the missing piece of the trap we want to set.”
“How did my father react?”
“To the video or when I told him about us?”
“What did you say?”
“That we met the night of the ball, and that once this is over, I want to see how far we can go.”
“Oh.” Ed was saying the right words, but Anastacia was more concerned about what he wasn’t saying.
“You might as well know, he doesn’t approve.”
“I don’t care. What we have—last night proves that there is something we can’t just ignore or pretend it doesn’t exist.”
“About that,” he started slowly. The moment Anastacia saw him slightly straighten, move back into his seat, she knew. No. “Last night has to be a one of thing.”
“I don’t understand, what does that even mean?” Physically, he’d only adjusted his position slightly, but she sensed he was already disengaging from last night, and her. Nothing she could say or do would change his mind—but why?
“We need to keep you alive and I can’t do that if I am sending my team home at night so we can be alone.”
Was that all? “I don’t care if they know about us,” she tried to laugh but he brushed away her hand.
“I do. I can’t look at you in the way I want and then expect them to trust my professional and objective opinion—making decisions that put their lives at risk. I can’t have my decision making compromised because I’m not thinking clearly.”
“But last night?” she protested. “You came home and said you wanted me, you sent Jax home and it was perfect.”
“Don’t you see—last night should never have happened but it did because I’d just been chewed out by your father because we met at the ball and then I let you run away.”
“Neither of those were your fault.”
Ed continued as if not hearing her, “Then I saw the video and wanted to replace every single one of your fucking memories with asshole. Replace the vision of that video with us.”
“You did, you have. I don’t care who else knows about us, do you hear me?” she cried, desperate for him to believe. “I don’t care.”
“Anastacia, last night should never have happened, and if I was thinking straight, it wouldn’t have.”
“But …”
“Last night can’t happen again, at least not until all this is over.”
Before she could protest or get out of the couch and hold him until he changed his mind, Ed left her for his shower.
Alone and with nothing to do other than cry, Anastacia watched the monitors until Jax’ motor bike came into view. He couldn’t see her like this, no one could. It wasn’t as if she even had a friend to cry to.
She went into her own ensuite and splashed handfuls of water over her face. The red eyes could be blamed on pain or a bad night’s sleep. But nothing could explain away her feeling of being used. Yes, she’d given herself freely—but she had trusted Ed to feel the same. Not come up with some lame excuse that he couldn’t care and protect her at the same time.
Still, all she had to do was close her eyes to feel his hands over her body, feel him within her. It would be impossible for her to separate her heart and head when it came to Ed, so how could she expect him to do so.
By the time Jax and the team arrived, only Jax guessed what had happened. He’d mostly taken the day shifts and spent the most time with them. It didn’t take him long to corner her at the window. “Are you okay?”
“Fine.”
“Anastacia?” It was the first time he hadn’t called her “Ms Vaughan.”
“No, but I will be.”
“Give him time. He thinks we don’t know or that we’d care. Protecting you is our job—but protecting his woman is something we’d give our lives for.”
“I’m not his woman,” she protested weakly, cuddled Ed’s jumper around her body as if holding onto a fading dream.
“Oh, yes you are. Like I said, give him time.”
ED
There was nothing else for it, he had to let his team not only see all the videos, but reach their own conclusions.
“Fuck, it looks like her.”
“Nah, she’d never.”
“What a fucking asshole of a husband.”
“He doesn’t even know what to do with the woman—it’s like he’s poking a ball with a stick.”
“Do we know anything about the woman?”
“Boss? What do you want us to do?”
Finally, one by one, his team looked to him for direction. Ed pulled out his most authorative Lieutenant Colonel in-the-field persona.
“Gentlemen, I am filled with more rage than you can imagine. It isn’t even about the woman we are protecting. It is that the animal in the video has already broken her bones during their marriage. He kept her in a state of fear until she had the strength to get away. Then, for reasons that we are still piecing together, he arranges for her kidnapping, beating and now this.”
“Boss, we get it.”
“No, I don’t think you do. She is the daughter of our commanding officer—therefore she could be any of our daughters, or wives, or girlfriends. He hits her—he hits us. Do we like to be hit, gentlemen?”
“No!” came the collective cry.
“What do we do when someone hits us?”
“Hit back harder, sir!” the collective shout could probably have been heard on the ground floor.
Ed lowered his voice, “I want you to clear the room, make yourselves some coffee and get something to eat. I’m going to call the Colonel and as soon as I’m finished, we’re going to get to work.”
“Sir, yes sir.”
“Colonel, good morning.”
“How’s my daughter.”
“She had a good night’s sleep, sir and is resting in her room. We’ve had a discussion and she won’t be pulling a stunt like that again.”
“What did she say about the video?”
“She is grateful that you knew it wasn’t her, sir.”
“You’re awfully formal for this time of the morning. No one else can hear us—at least not at my end.”
Vaughan couldn’t know how Ed was only holding onto reality by putting up formal barriers. Last night had shaken him to his core—never had he been so emotionally and physically honest with a woman. Only to have to walk away this morning, hurting the one person in the world he loved.
Love. Could only end up putting their lives—her life—at risk.
“Sir, the team has seen the video.”
“They’ve seen it? Oh, my,
Staci.”
“Sir, they know it’s not your daughter and they are confident the trace will be finished within the hour.”
“Good.”
“Sir, I want to pull a team together. Call them a group of concerned friends who will deal with the situation, permanently.”
“You know I can’t sanction that—or get anyone else involved. It would be the end of your career if you get caught or if things go wrong.”
Ed asked for permission out of courtesy and respect. With or without Vaughan’s support, or even a team, he knew what had to be done.
“What’s the use of a career if we can’t save our women, I mean …” He didn’t mean to speak that way about Anastacia—she couldn’t be his until all this was over.
“Do it.” Vaughan cut off his thoughts. “Do it, get it over with.”
“Sir, are you sure? This man was once your son.”
“A man like that is no son of mine. If you’ve got the balls, do your best.”
Now, Ed started to smile, “Sir, you’ve seen me at my best.”
“Then you’ve already had a practice run. This time, have some fun on my behalf—on my daughter’s behalf.”
“I need to reach out to some friends we’ve never had.” He didn’t have to explain or name names to Vaughan.
“They owe me more favors than I’ve ever collected.”
“Call them in?” He had more than a few favors out there, but if you combined his with Vaughan’s, they could probably invade a small island nation.
“Abso-fucking-lutely.”
Ed felt a calmness that he didn’t deserve to have, “Give me twenty-four hours.”
Decisions
ANASTASIA
“I want to go shopping, I’m sick of wearing your clothes.” They had become a bittersweet memory of their night together. In the day since, Ed had been so cold that it was as if it had all been a dream – yet another nightmare to add to her growing list. From falling asleep in his arms and dreaming about all their tomorrows, to being shoved aside for her own protection. “This is bullshit, and you know it.” She wasn’t talking about the clothes.
Defend Her: A military suspense romance (Aussie Military Romance Book 4) Page 10
