by Lynette Noni
Before Kael can answer, his phone makes an obnoxious alarm sound, and he pulls it from his pocket, cursing when the display lights up.
“Time’s up, princess,” he says, turning the screen around to show me the clock.
I hadn’t realized it was so late; the zoo’s after-hours event will be finishing up in a few minutes, and any remaining visitors will be kicked out of the park.
Kael gently grabs my upper arm and starts retracing our steps along the tunnel. “We’ve got to get you topside before your Lengard crew takes off,” he says, each of his steps requiring two of mine, “and since we’re halfway to hell down here, we’re going to have to hurry to get you back.”
“You haven’t answered my questions,” I say, skip-jogging beside him. “How do you know about me?”
When he doesn’t say anything, I dig in my feet, halting us both. “Kael. Tell me.”
Every muscle in his body is locked tight. “We don’t have —”
“We don’t have time, I know, I know,” I interrupt. “But you need to make time. I need you to explain how you know who I am and what I’ve done, when no one else in the world knows.”
He lets out a surprised laugh. “You’re kidding, right?”
I’m not kidding, but I am confused. And Kael must see that, because the smile drops off his face, replaced by an incredulous expression.
“You really have no idea, do you?” He shakes his head. “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but almost everyone at Lengard knows who you are, Lyss. At least in the Genesis generation. They’ve known all along.”
I suddenly find it hard to breathe again and wheeze out, “What?”
“In the history of Lengard, very few Genesis Speakers have left the facility permanently, and only two families managed it on their own without needing to be smuggled out. The Roscaves … and the Scotts.”
He pauses to let that sink in, but all I hear is a ringing in my ears until he continues, “You were just a baby when your parents packed you up and took off, but my dad — and later Falon and Vanik — kept an eye on you all. Your whole life, they’ve been watching you. Even longer than we have. How else do you think they found you in some backwater psychiatric institution?”
Feeling slightly ill, I say, “Falon said that their scouts found my brain scans or something in the system after I checked myself in, and that the readings matched what they were after so they picked me up.”
“You seriously believed that?”
It does sound far-fetched. “But if my parents were at Lengard, then that means —”
“They were Speakers, too? Yep. You’re Xanaphan-free, princess.”
Overwhelmed and frustrated by everything he hasn’t explained, I demand, “Why do you keep calling me that?”
He rubs the back of his neck and releases a sigh filled with impatience. “Look, there’s lots I haven’t yet told you, including how Liana has kept an eye on you over the years. But I’m not kidding, Lyss — if we stand around and chat just to appeal to your curiosity, then you’re going to miss the ferry.”
I open my mouth to argue, but he places a finger over my lips, keeping me silent.
“I promise you’ll hear from me again soon. And I’ll explain everything then. You have my word.”
For some inexplicable reason, I believe him. That, and I don’t want to get stuck down here and allow copycat me to go back to Lengard to carry on with the ruse. So I nod and follow after he drops his hand from my mouth, flashes me a small but dazzling grin and leads the way back up the tunnel again at a pace so fast I’m nearly sprinting to keep up.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
It’s surprisingly easy to get back aboveground.
After retrieving the glove and glasses I’d dropped and hiding them in my coat, and after saying goodbye to Pandora and Liana, who are both staying behind, I hurry with Kael, Jet, Dante and the still-restrained Sneak back to the ancient elevator.
Jet keeps the five of us cloaked once we’re out of the catacombs and walking along the zoo’s paths again, but it’s not as much of a fright this time, since I now understand why I’m transparent. Strange, yes. Terrifying, no.
Invisible, we hurry toward the ferry terminal, having received an update from Pandora that my Lengard friends are getting ready to board the boat back to Circular Quay.
We’re almost to the dock, when Kael pulls us all off the path and into a grove of trees swallowed by darkness. Only the faintest trace of moonlight filters through.
“Jet,” Kael says.
Whether he destroys her cloaking or she cancels it herself, either way, the five of us become visible again. Due to the limited light, I can make out little more than the shadowed outline of their bodies.
“I don’t need a reminder,” I say, assuming that’s why we’ve paused here. “I know I only have three days to use the glove and glasses to see if you’re right about Vanik’s secret lab. I won’t forget.”
“That’s not why we’ve stopped,” Dante says, pushing Sneak in front of him and closer to me.
There’s meaning in the move, but I’m not sure what meaning.
Not until Kael explains, “You have to wipe his memories, Lyss. He can’t go back to Lengard knowing everything he heard and saw tonight.”
I’m taken aback by his words, even if on some rational level I know he’s right. But I can’t get a single word out — whether to agree or disagree — before Sneak starts to struggle.
“No!” he cries out. “Don’t listen to them, Jane! I don’t — You can’t — Please, don’t —”
“Easy, kid,” Dante cuts him off, holding him tighter. “She’s not going to hurt you. You won’t even know anything has changed.”
Sneak’s face looks positively ghostly in the moonlight. “She doesn’t have any control! She could do anything to me!”
He’s correct, but that doesn’t stop me from recoiling at his words.
Kael doesn’t miss my reaction, and his face hardens. Even in the low light I see him narrow angry eyes at Sneak.
I reach out to touch Kael’s arm. “No, he’s right,” I say. “I’ve only wiped memories once before, and that time I had Ward keeping me in check.”
“And this time you have me,” Kael points out. “Not that you need my help.”
“You have too much confidence in me,” I murmur.
“No, I just have more confidence in you than you do,” he replies. “Now, hurry up or you’ll both be camping here for the night.”
Still unsure, I tentatively ask, “How much do I try to modify?”
“Take him back to the chimpanzees and wipe everything from then on,” Dante says. He has a hand on Sneak’s temple again, and a soft light glows around them both. “He was hungry and considering leaving you quickly to go grab some food, so make him think that happened and that he wandered on his own for a while before meeting up with the group for the seal show. Make sure he has no suspicions. Everything was normal, and you were with the others the whole time.”
“No! No, Jane, don’t do this!” Sneak cries.
He is terrified — of me.
I look to Kael, and he gives me a single nod.
“Careful now,” he warns. “Watch your words. Watch your intent. But also trust yourself — you can do this.”
“And if I can’t?”
“Then like I said, I’ve got your back, princess. The kid’ll be fine either way,” he answers. “Now, do it. Quick. The moment you’re done, I’ll stop blocking him so he’ll be back to his invisible self, and Jet’ll cloak us again to keep him from seeing us. You’ll have a few seconds where he’ll be disoriented, and that’s when you need to get out of here, but don’t worry, we’ll push him in the right direction for him to stumble out and meet you on the boat.”
His confidence starts to rub off on me, the plan clear in my mind.
“Shae — your doppelgänger — will be waiting in the bathroom on the ferry to swap places with you,” Kael finishes. “Now, hurry — because by the sounds of
it, they’re getting ready to cast off.”
Feeling the stress of the moment but also knowing how important it is to concentrate, I take a deep breath, ignore Sneak’s pleas, trust Kael’s promise and focus my thoughts on a single-minded intention. “Forget,” I whisper, seeing everything in my mind exactly as Dante suggested.
I don’t need to watch the soft light flow from me or hear Kael’s quiet, “Nice work, princess,” to know I managed to do it all on my own. And I feel a little bit of pride at that, even as we all disappear again and I hurry out of the trees, down to the dock, and over the gangplank onto the ferry.
Jet must know exactly when I enter the bathroom, because the moment I do, I become visible again.
“Thank God! I thought you’d never get here!”
I stop short at the sight of — me.
Stunned, I can only watch as my copycat, Shae, says a few quiet words and, with a flash of light, transforms into a young man wearing a smart business suit.
Only then does she — now he — catch my gaping self and push me toward the door. “What are you waiting for? Seriously, Lyss — go!”
It’s only when I’m seated at the back of the ferry with Abby asleep on my lap and my Lengard friends arguing about whether the penguins or the crocodiles were more interesting that I try to gather my thoughts. But everything Kael told me is too fresh. I need time to get my head around it all, time to see for myself if he was telling the truth. Time to decide what to do.
For the rest of tonight, at least, I won’t think about Vanik’s lab or Lengard knowing who I really am. I won’t think about my parents being Speakers, why they left Lengard and why they never told me about their ability — or thought to warn me about mine.
Instead, I close my eyes, lean my head back and focus on clearing my mind.
Everything can wait until tomorrow, I tell myself. I’ll deal with it all then.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
In my defense, my intentions were good. I planned to follow up on what I learned yesterday first thing this morning. But before I could do so, I was called to an unexpected — and early — training session with Ward. Hours later, I’m blurry eyed and have a stress headache verging on migraine status, with it taking everything I have to concentrate on his lesson.
It doesn’t help that Ward is edgier than normal today. Last night he stopped by our quarters after we returned from the zoo, and I struggled being in the same room as him, wondering if he knew the truth about Vanik. If he knew the truth about me.
… And fearing his level of involvement with what might truly be happening here at Lengard.
This morning’s session has given me no further insight into what he might know. The only way I’m able to remotely focus on the tasks he’s setting is by suppressing everything Kael said yesterday. It’s the only way I can listen to Ward, look at Ward, be anywhere near Ward.
“Where’s your head at today, Jane?” Ward barks.
I drag my eyes to him.
Standing in the center of the Karoel-lined training room with his jeans and white T-shirt in stark contrast to the black rock, he glares at me.
It seems like forever ago that I last saw his dimpled smile.
The moment that thought crosses my mind, I shove it away.
I don’t want to see Ward smile.
I don’t.
Not at me. Not at anything.
He manipulated me. He betrayed me. And, quite possibly, those are the least of his offenses, if even a fraction of what Kael claims about Vanik is true — and especially if Ward, the director-in-training, has been in on it all along.
“I didn’t sleep well,” I mumble out my excuse, forcing myself to ignore the way his features soften at my admission. “And I have a headache.”
He walks toward me, his steps deliberate. “Something on your mind?”
I nearly laugh at the loaded question. But perhaps … “Can I ask you something?”
I see it happen immediately. His face shuts down, his body tightens. His reaction makes me want to throw something at him.
To my surprise, however, he says, “Of course.”
I remind myself that he didn’t promise honesty. He has no qualms about lying to me. But this is an opportunity I’m not willing to waste.
“Why two and a half years?”
“What?”
I know I have to tread carefully. “Cami and Manning both told me that when new Speakers arrive at Lengard, they go through an initiation period, but it doesn’t last long before they’re moved down here to begin proper training.”
Ward nods, his eyes wary but not as shuttered as they were before.
“Why did Falon wait over two and a half years with me?” I ask. “Why wait so long and then suddenly threaten to kill me if I remained uncooperative?”
Ward straightens. “Falon never threatened your life.”
I cross my arms. “The implication was there. Come on, Ward. What do you think he was going to do once my month was up? Let me go on my merry way?”
“He wasn’t going to kill you,” Ward says firmly. “My uncle is many things, but he’s not a murderer. That’s not what happens here.”
I wonder how he can say that to me with a straight face after what happened to his parents. Sneak confirmed it, so I know at least that part of Kael’s story must be true.
“Then explain it to me,” I challenge. I was never brave enough to ask before, but now I have to know. “Justify how I was locked up, imprisoned in an unending routine, until you came along and I was given a month to live.”
A muscle in his jaw twitches. “I’m telling you, Jane. That part you misunderstood.”
“Did I misunderstand the rest?” I ask, eyebrows raised. “Did I imagine the years of electroshock and everything else? Is torture considered a normal hazing practice for Lengard’s new Speakers?”
I know I’ve scored a point when Ward is unable to hold my gaze.
“Vanik took liberties with you beyond what was acceptable,” he admits. “He’s been reprimanded for his actions.”
My reply is caustic. “I’m sure that will stop him from hurting anyone else.”
“He’s the reason Enzo was working with you.”
My forehead crinkles. “Come again?”
“Exodus recruits aren’t supposed to have contact with those in initiation,” Ward reminds me, “but Enzo was with you from the very beginning to monitor your well-being, making sure you were staying physically healthy — and mentally healthy.”
An image of my hot-pink gloves comes to mind, the only splash of color in my otherwise whitewashed existence, and Enzo’s words from that night whisper across my memory: You can survive this … Just don’t give up.
Was he playing me all along, too? Just like Ward?
I hear Enzo’s voice again, remember more of his words: It’s about time you joined the fold. I thought you were never gonna Speak.
I close my eyes and turn away from Ward, certain he’ll be able to read the question on my face if I don’t. The question of whether they all know who I really am. Whether they all know the real reason I didn’t Speak for so long. Whether they know my name … Whether they know I killed my parents.
At least I’m certain Cami doesn’t know. She would have told me. I’m sure of it.
Having confidence in my friend helps loosen the ugly feeling in my chest a little.
“It was my uncle who tasked Enzo with watching over you,” Ward says, drawing my eyes back to him. “Enzo grew up as a military kid, his parents both highly decorated officers. In the years before he began Speaking and was brought here to Lengard, he was schooled in all kinds of physical training, which made him the perfect person to keep an eye on you.”
I roll that over in my mind. “Why was Enzo in place to make sure I survived the initiation if Vanik wasn’t supposed to take things so far?”
“Given your background, my uncle figured it was better to be safe than sorry.”
My breath hitches, and I squeak out, “My
background?”
I wonder if this is it. The moment that I’ll discover just how deep his betrayal goes.
“You checked yourself into a psychiatric institution,” Ward says.
I relax — slightly.
“No one had any idea how you would react to being here. And when you didn’t Speak for so long …”
He trails off with a shrug, so I finish for him. “When I didn’t Speak, they decided to just keep waiting to see if I would.”
“Yes,” he confirms. “It was important that you revealed your ability of your own free will and didn’t feel pressured into working with us.”
At that, I can’t hold back my incredulous laugh. “I guess two and a half years was enough for them to give up on that, huh?”
“No one forced you to Speak that first time, Jane,” Ward says, his voice hard. “You did that on your own.”
“If I hadn’t, Abby would be six feet under right now.”
He has the grace to flinch — violently.
Running a hand through his hair, he says, “Look, there’s no point arguing about this.”
“We’re not arguing,” I, well, argue. “We’re discussing the justification for my imprisonment.” Never mind that I wanted to be locked away from the world. That part doesn’t need to factor into our narrative right now.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Jane,” Ward declares, throwing his arms out in an uncharacteristic show of frustration. “Do you want me to admit that I don’t know why they kept you in that prison cell for so long? Do you want me to tell you that I think what Vanik did to you was unforgivable? That he should be punished for his actions and made to endure the same horrific tests he carried out on you? Do you want me to say I wish my uncle had sent me to you sooner? Is that what you want from me?”
I’m trying to keep my expression blank, but it’s taking everything in me to do so. I haven’t seen him so emotional since before he turned into cold Ward. But there’s nothing cold about him now. His eyes are burning, his hands are clenched and every line in his body is strained with tension.
It might make me a coward, or it might make me an angel, but either way, I don’t think either of us can handle taking this conversation further. Not right now. My headache has only increased during our discussion, and my temples are throbbing so painfully that it’s a miracle I can see straight.
