They’d been in the hospital a week and a half now, and there was no time frame on them getting out.
Jeremy had made calls to the best doctors in the world; money was no object now since he had full ownership of every company that he and Trevor had ever created together. The doctors all had the same look after they saw her chart. They all smiled softly and touched his shoulder. “There isn't much hope, Mr. Parks.”
He put out feelers for paranormal specialists, and several had come. One man with a grizzled beard and lavender robes had looked at the pattern of her burns and her chart, his eyes widening. “She exhausted her power.”
“What do you mean, she exhausted her power?”
The small man shrugged. “Something made her literally implode. From her injuries, I assume she was being abused, yes?”
Jeremy nodded, his eyes hot with tears. “A vampire planned to use her to create a new vampire race.”
The man shivered. “Thank God he didn't.”
Jeremy laughed sadly. “I can't imagine what she went through.”
“She'll never have powers again. I don't feel anything from her. She's just a girl now. A very broken one at that. I'm sorry.”
“Isn't there anything you can do?”
He smiled sadly. “No, Mr. Parks, I'm sorry. Literature only shows this happening a few times in history…usually the person dies, but she had a substantial connection with this earth: your daughter and you. I think she held on only because of that.”
The man had left and Jeremy had prayed harder, begging anything good that would listen—God, Allah, Zeus—to please help her.
He was brought back to the present as the nurse turned off the hair clippers. His throat tightened as she cleaned up the mess and left the room quietly. He walked over to the bed and bent slowly, pressing his lips to the one square inch on Sasha's face that wasn't seared and wrapped in bandages, the small bit of skin between her eyes.
“If you can hear me, cupcake, listen close. I'm going nowhere. I'll always be right here waiting for you. I'm not giving up on you. You’re a fighter, Sasha, and I’m so sorry for all of this. It’s all over now. Claudio and Trevor are gone, and no one can hurt us anymore. I just need…” He took a slow breath and wiped his eyes. “I just need you to wake up. Please. Onyx and I need you so much.”
He fell to his knees beside the bed and tangled his fists in her blankets and his body shook as he sobbed.
Tabitha and Rachelle, Sasha's sisters, came in carrying Onyx, their chatter waking him from his stupor. He wiped the drool from his mouth and smiled softly at his daughter, who was cooing and shaking a rattle.
Rachelle handed him the baby and he sat on the cold linoleum floor holding his girl. She reached for his face and touched his cheek before gurgling and spitting up on her bib. He couldn't help but laugh as he peeled the bib off and sat it on the floor beside him before putting her against his shoulder. He breathed in her soft baby scent and murmured into her neck, “Sweet girl, we have to keep hoping for Mommy to wake up. We need her, don't we, baby?”
“What are the plans, Jeremy? Have the doctors decided anything?” Tabitha piped up, twining her fingers nervously.
He nodded. “They’re going to be prepping her for more surgery soon. They have to get some skin grafts done. Then we’re hoping she’ll wake up soon.”
“What if she doesn't wake up?” Rachelle whispered, her chin quivering. Tabitha caught her hand and held it tight.
Jeremy climbed to his feet and whispered roughly, “She's going to wake up. She has to. Do you hear me? Don't you fucking dare give up on her. She needs our strength. Don't you dare give up on her.” Tears ran down his face and he held his daughter tight against his chest.
Rachelle walked across the room and touched his shoulder, her brown eyes glistening with tears. “I'm not, Jeremy. I'm being a realist.”
“Rachelle, I can't…I can't think about that right now. She's going to wake up. She's going to be okay. Do you hear me?”
She stepped back with a nod. “I hear you. All we can do is hope and hold on.”
The nurse came back into the room and began unlocking the brakes on the bed. “We're ready to take her back into surgery.”
Jeremy nodded tightly and watched as Sasha's mother and sisters kissed the bandages wrapping her face and cried. They stepped back, letting him have the final moments with her. He whispered softly, his voice cracking with agony, “Come back to me, cupcake.” He kissed the square of skin between her eyes again and held his lips there for a moment more, willing any strength he had to go into her body.
As they took her from the room, Jeremy collapsed into a chair and took his daughter into his arms. The nurse assured them it wouldn't take too long and she'd update them as soon as the doctors were done.
Two hours passed with no word. Onyx lay in her car seat, cuddled into a fleece blanket, her dark lashes curled onto her cheeks. Tabitha and Rachelle were reading on a Kindle, occasionally bickering as one read faster than the other. Amy and Jeremy simply sat, staring holes into the walls. He ran his hand through his hair, mussing it further, and rested his elbows on his knees, letting his hands dangle between his thighs.
The nurse came in to tell them that there had been some blood loss, but Sasha would survive. He rejoiced, hugging everyone tight. She was still alive.
A few days later, Tabitha and Rachelle had to leave to go back to school. He bid them farewell from Sasha's bedside, refusing to leave her. Amy brought Onyx back and forth daily from the small house he'd finally purchased, only minutes from the hospital. He held his little girl in his arms and watched her smile.
He enjoyed being with Sasha and Onyx, just like this, in silence. It was everything he could hope for and more. Onyx's eyes slid shut and he lay her in the crook of Sasha's arm, praying that somehow she could feel her daughter there and would wake up soon.
***
The water was warm and Sasha kicked off from the bottom of the abyss, her long legs fluttering through the thickening liquid. The surface seemed so close, but so far away. She reached up, fingers searching for the top, and her chest ached from lack of oxygen. So close…she stretched further and further, begging her lungs to hold on for one more second, one more moment, she was almost awake. As her eyes opened she realized that her body ached, terribly and she pulled away from the pain.
A scream left her mouth as she stared down at her body on an operating table. Doctors were cutting and sewing on her body and she panicked, realizing she was no longer inside herself. Am I dead?
“No, mommy, you're very alive, you're just with me.” She turned at the soft voice and saw her daughter standing there.
“Onyx,” she breathed, stepping forward to pull the tiny tot into her arms.
Onyx pulled back, giggling as she ran away, and Sasha followed her. Suddenly they were in a field of flowers and Sasha relaxed, smiling as she watched her daughter dance through the field. They'd been doing this now for a very long time…she didn't really know how long, her daughter just came to her often. It made floating in between worth it. “Mommy, come on!” Her feet lifted and she danced through the grass with her, marveling at the lack of pain.
“Onyx, how does this keep happening?”
She stopped spinning, her lemon yellow skirts swirling around her knees. “Mommy, it's simple. We sleep, and we both dream we're here.” Her little face tipped up and the sun kissed it sweetly.
“How is your daddy?” Her chest tightened, thinking of the man she loved.
“Daddy is…Daddy's sad, Mommy. He cries a lot. Can't you wake up?”
“Baby, I'd give anything to. I don't know how.” Sasha reached for her daughter and enveloped her in her arms, relishing the baby scent she still had about her.
Onyx stroked her cheek. “You open your eyes, Mommy.” She took Sasha's hand in her sticky palm and they walked into the sunset on the horizon. “Just keep walking to me, Mommy. Don't stop following my voice, even if it gets a little dark. Just trust me, Mommy.”
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Sasha's throat tightened again, remembering when someone else told her to follow him. “Baby, I'm scared.”
Onyx touched her cheek again. “Don't be, Mommy.”
She nodded bravely, although her lip quivered. “I'll try.”
The dream faded and being ripped from the warm light hurt worse than anything she'd ever felt. Finally, she sucked in air; it was like being sliced open from the inside. Her eyes flicked open and everything came into focus slowly.
“Sasha?” She heard a voice she knew and it sounded so beautiful, but she couldn't find the source and she wanted to sob against the frustration. “Sasha, baby, don't cry. I'm right here. You have to stay really still. I'm right here, beautiful.” A tear leaked from the corner of her eye and she felt herself going under again. The pull of unconsciousness was delicious and she gave in. It hurt too much to stay even though she wanted it more than anything in the world.
***
Jeremy jumped up from the side of the bed and ran for the door. He grabbed the first nurse he found by the collar of her jacket and kissed her cheek. “She woke up!” he cried out, his voice gravelly and rough. It had been a long three months, but she had finally opened her eyes. The nurse patted her hair and flushed.
“Let me get the doctor for you, sir.”
He leaned against the wall and sobbed, doubled over at the waist, his palms on his thighs. The doctor touched his shoulder a few minutes later and he looked up with a shaky smile. “She woke up.”
Dr. Riviera smiled. “This is fantastic. Come, let's see if she will wake up again for us.” They walked in the room and Jeremy went to the side of the bed.
“Sasha. Beautiful, wake up for me. I want to see your beautiful eyes.” He leaned closer and brushed a kiss over her rough cheek. “Wake up for me, love,” he murmured into her ear sweetly.
She stirred softly and the doctor grinned, his thumbs up in support. “Keep trying.”
Jeremy stroked a finger lazily across the top of her hand. “Beautiful, wake up for me again. Please. I need you.” Jeremy watched as her eyes slowly opened and focused.
“J - Jeremy?” she murmured, her voice whisper soft.
Dr. Riviera stepped forward and smiled. “Sasha, welcome back. I'm Dr. Riviera, one of a team of doctors that has been with you since you arrived here, three and a half months ago.”
She turned her head slightly in panic, seeking Jeremy's eyes. “On-Onyx?”
He bent and kissed her cheek. “She's safe, cupcake, and so are you.”
“Tell her,” she whispered brokenly, her mouth tipping up slightly, “To come dance.”
His brow furrowed as he watched her eyes close again. “What does she mean?”
Dr. Riviera snorted. “Who knows? Maybe it’s a dream she had? I guess I'm boring. We can let her sleep. Jeremy, I'm thrilled with this progress; it's beyond what we could have hoped for, really.”
Jeremy nodded tightly. “When can I take her home?” The doctor pursed his lips and looked at her chart again. “If we can get her awake more…if you’re willing to have a home care nurse, and a physical therapist come daily, I don't see why we couldn't have her home to you in a couple of weeks. Are you going to stay in the area?”
Jeremy nodded. “I'll stay here until she's able to travel.” He stepped forward and shook the doctor's hand. “You don't know how much I thank you.”
The doctor smiled sadly. “Come outside with me for a minute, Jeremy.” He opened the door and stepped into the hall. Jeremy followed and closed the door behind him. The doctor sat in one of the chairs against the wall and gestured for Jeremy to take the other.
“What is it, Dr. Riviera?” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
The doctor sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Jeremy. We don't know what her quality of life will be. It might be in your best interest to put her in a long-term care facility.” Jeremy shook his head vehemently. “No, listen to me. She's got a hell of a long road ahead of her.”
“I. Don't. Care.” Jeremy spit out, before standing and pacing the hall. “She's still Sasha. She's still in there somewhere. Do you hear me? She's still fucking there.”
Dr. Riviera smiled sadly. “She is, but what if she's different?”
Jeremy ran a hand through his hair and sighed in frustration. “Maybe, but I won't give up on her.”
“Okay. I just want you to know what you may face, Jeremy. There will be ups and downs. She may fall into some severe depression or get angry. We don't know. It depends on a lot of things. I just want you to understand.”
“I understand. I love her. I’ve lost her twice and I'll never lose her again.”
Dr. Riviera studied his face quietly for a minute. “All right, well, that's that then, isn't it?”
“Yeah, it is. I want her home with me sooner rather than later. I'm going to put some calls in; I'll have things ready for her tomorrow.”
“Jeremy, I'm just trying to prepare you.”
“No. You're just giving up.” Jeremy walked to the door and waited for it to open before looking back at the doctor. “She didn't give up; don't give up on her.”
The move to the small house had been smooth. Sasha had slept through most of it, fluttering in and out of consciousness. She was still in pain most of time and the pain medication kept her in a dulled state. The nurse he'd hired was amazing at her job. Helen was always gentle and kind, pushing Sasha to do more, to want more. He could never stay with her while her physical therapist worked her muscles. The sound of her pain tore at his heart.
Each day seemed to slowly get better. She'd had a couple of minor setbacks: a mild infection in one of her skin grafts that had thankfully healed with some antibiotics, and a fall when she insisted on walking to the bathroom alone instead of pressing the call button for her nurse. Her body was almost completely healed at this point, but it’d been a long road. She struggled with PTSD and nightmares. Her therapist was diligently working with her. A huge part of her pain seemed to have been blocked off in some recess of her mind.
Sasha showed no emotion with him. She refused his kiss and flinched at his touch. Everyone had been extremely careful about keeping her away from mirrors; she'd touched her scars and panicked, and the therapist thought it would be best to wait. Jeremy, however, did not. He wanted her to know what she looked like, so she could learn to live a different way.
Sasha only seemed to respond when Onyx was in the room. Onyx was nine months old now and into everything. He brought the baby to her room late one afternoon to find Sasha out of bed. He heard a noise in the bathroom and put the baby in her bouncer before grabbing the door knob. It was locked.
“Sasha, what are you doing in there?” No response, just heart-wrenching sobs. “Sasha, open the door.”
“Why didn't you tell me I looked like this?” she rasped. His heart thudded in his chest. She'd found a mirror.
“Like what, baby? Please open the door.” He jiggled the knob harder. No luck.
“I wondered why there was no mirror in the bathroom,” she whispered.
“Baby, open the door.”
“Why?”
“So I can talk to you. Please, Sasha.”
She laughed and he heard something clatter to the floor. “I don't want to talk anymore.”
“God damn it, Sasha. Open the door!” He pushed his shoulder against it and screamed for the nurse. “Helen, I need you!” He threw his weight against the door, over and over until it finally gave way, the lock breaking and wood splintering. Sasha lay in the tub, blood spattered over her nightgown and oozing from her wrist.
Sasha looked up at him in confusion, tears crashing down her cheeks. “Leave me alone, please.”
“Hell no. God damn it, Sasha!” He picked her up from the cold porcelain tub and cradled her in his arms. Helen skidded into the room.
“What's going on?” The nurse’s chest heaved and her eyes were wild.
“She found a mirror.” The shards of the compact mirror were all over
the tile of the bathroom and the biggest shard lay in the tub, coated in crimson. “She cut her wrist.”
Helen paled. “It must have fallen out of my pocket. I'm so sorry.”
Sasha squirmed in his arms. “Let me down. Now, damn it!”
He gripped her tighter. “Never.”
“Let me down!” She beat at his chest, her blood smearing across the thin cotton of his shirt.
He held her stoically while Helen ran for bandages. “No.”
She flailed and beat at him in fury, slapping his face so hard his ears rang. “I hate you! I hate you!” He caught his hand behind her head and gently massaged her neck. Her short hair slid between his fingers and he held her tight. “I hate you,” she whispered against his neck, the storm finally spent.
His gums ached at the scent of her blood and he smiled sadly as Helen came back and surveyed her wrist. “How bad is it?”
She shook her head. “Not bad, thankfully, she just nicked the skin a little. This time we got lucky. She bandaged Sasha’s arm quickly. “I'm going to leave you two alone. I’ll take the baby to her room to play, if that's all right.”
Jeremy nodded quickly. “Please do, Helen.” Sasha hung limp in his arms, exhausted. He laid her back on her pale pink sheets and she rolled to the wall, sobs shaking her frame. He kicked off his shoes and slid into the bed behind her.
She lay stiff and ground out between clenched teeth, “Get out of my bed.”
“No, Sasha, I won't.” He slid his arm under her pillow and pulled her into his embrace. She held herself away from him, her tears flowing freely.
“Leave me alone. How the fuck can you still want me?” She curled forward, bringing her knees up to her chest.
“How can I not, Sasha?” He pressed a kiss to the back of her neck, breathing in her scent. His gums throbbed and he pushed it back. He'd come too damn far to want blood now. The vitamins were keeping it in check. She needed him now, a whole lot more than he needed blood.
“How can you even bear to hold me? I'm hideous. Why didn't you tell me my scars looked like this?”
Once Bitten, Twice Shy Page 14