by Quell T Fox
I hear tires on the gravel, and I look out the still opened kitchen door. It’s Josh. It’s clear I woke him; he looks half asleep. He’s wearing black sweatpants and a black hoodie. His light hair shines in the sun, but it is a mess. Sticking up in spots that it shouldn’t be. He probably rolled right out of bed and came here. He runs up the stairs, meeting my eyes as he enters the house.
“Hey, Josh.” He’s looking at me with disbelief all over his face. I hate these situations. “He’s in his room, please go ahead.”
“Thank you.” It’s said so quietly that I almost don’t hear the words.
I pour him a cup of coffee. I don’t know if he likes coffee, but I have no idea what I should be doing right now. All of this feels so awkward. I barely even knew the guy, I feel for Andrew, he’s visibly upset, but other than that, I don’t know. I just don’t know.
Glancing at my phone, hoping more than ever that I have a missed call or text because I could really use an escape right about now. Of course, there’s nothing.
I don’t know how it feels to lose someone that I care about, the only people I truly care about are my parents. Speaking of, I haven’t heard back from them yet. I wonder where they are and why they haven’t called back yet. When they are out of the country, they usually check their messages nightly and return my calls by the next day. I don’t know how I should feel right now, but I do know that the way I feel is not right. I should be feeling something, but I feel nothing other than the want to be out of this house and away from these sad people.
Compassion is not my thing. I’m selfish, remember?
Andrew doesn’t say a word as they take Abe out of the house. He stands by the dining room door, staring at his feet. I don’t know what I should say to him, or if he wants me to say anything at all. Josh makes his way over to Andrew, looking paler than normal. He pats Andrew on the shoulder and gets pulled in for a hug.
“I’m sorry, man. I’m sorry you didn’t have more time.” Josh’s voice sounds like he’s holding back tears. Andrew pats his back and then lets him go. He looks at Josh and nods. “Keep in touch.” He turns to face me and gives me a half smile. He walks out towards his car and drives off. I doubt I’ll ever see him again.
The ambulance is sitting in the driveway, lights on, the paramedics filling out whatever paperwork it is that they need to do before they take off. The officer must have left already because his car is missing from the driveway. Closing the door, I decide it’s time to put the heat up. The sun is shining today, but it’s the coldest day we’ve had so far. Having the door open all this time made it colder in the house than I’d like. Besides, people always seem cold when they’re sad and Andrew is definitely sad.
“I have to call my family. They need to start making arrangements.” There’s no emotion in his voice as he speaks the words. He picks up his cell from the couch, shoving it into his back pocket. My eyes don’t leave him as he walks up the stairs, not knowing what to say or do, I watch.
I’m sad I didn’t get to know him better, no, I’m sad that Andrew didn’t get to spend more time with him. He was trying really hard to build a relationship with his grandfather. Spending every minute he had with him, taking him out to eat, watching movies with him. I feel bad for that. But mostly now, I feel guilty. Because how the hell can I leave at a time like this?
An hour later I check on Andrew because I haven’t heard a sound from up there. When I peek into the bedroom, I find out why. He’s sound asleep, with his cell phone resting on his chest. I pick it up and place it on his bedside table, not wanting it to fall on the floor. His phone is a brand-new model and he refuses to put a screen protector on it. I’d hate for it to shatter, that’s not something he needs right now. Wondering if I should silence his phone, I decide against it. Yeah, he needs to sleep, but he will want to be there for his family and if they call, he will want to know.
My stomach growls, my hand moving to it naturally. What’s left to do now besides eat? I’ve been up for a while and haven’t had breakfast yet. Opening the fridge, I pull out the leftover Chinese food and empty the container onto a plate. Fried rice, boneless spareribs, crab rangoon and chicken fingers, all tastes just as good when it’s reheated. Putting it into the microwave, I hit the button with the three on it. I grab a beer while I wait, the last one. It’s not too early for alcohol, it never is. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I’ll have to make a trip to the store later because I will absolutely be needing a lot of alcohol over the next few days.
I’m sitting on the counter, spacing out when the microwave beeps. Taking the plate out, I rush over to the table, practically dropping it because it’s so hot. That doesn’t stop me from eating it, though. I empty four packets of duck sauce onto the mound of rice, using it to dip the chicken in, too. When I’m finished, I lean back in the chair and take a deep breath. This changes things.
There’s movement to my right and my heart jumps. Andrew looks like hell. His hair is a mess, his clothes wrinkled, and his eyes are still red, and now puffy. I wasn’t expecting him to be awake this soon, someone must have called.
“I’m going to head up to my uncles for a few days. We’re all meeting there to figure out what to do with grandpa.” His voice huskier than normal.
Standing up, I go to him and put my arms around his waist. He pulls me into a hug, resting his cheek on my head. “I’m okay. I just want to be there for my family. I’ll be back in a few days.”
I let go and step back to look up at him. “Let me know if you need anything. I’ll be here.” I push up to my tippy toes and find his lips. He kisses me back and when I try to pull away, he moves his hand to the back of my head and pushes me into him with a need that I’ve never felt from him before. His tongue on my lip as he tries to enter my mouth. I let him and push my body closer to his. He breaks the kiss, holding my face between his hands.
“I love you. I hope you know that.”
“Of course, I know.” I say back, with a half-smile. “Let me help you pack.”
“That would be great.”
The suitcases were left in the basement, as big as this house is, it doesn’t have a lot of closet space and I didn’t think we would be needing them any time soon. I run down to the basement and snatch up Andrew’s suitcase, the smaller one in the set. He said a few days, so this one should be enough. When I get upstairs, I’m out of breath. I’ve gotten used to going up one flight but doing them both back to back like that is a little much. It’s pathetic how out of shape I am.
Andrew is pulling clothes out of the closet and throwing them on the bed. I fold everything that he’s laid out, able to fit it into the case. It’s another talent I have, learned from moving around so much.
He takes his boots off, switching them for his black sneakers. I pack his toothbrush in a travel container and put it into the front pouch of the bag.
Twenty minutes later, Andrew is walking to his car. I stand on the porch and wave to him as he drives off.
This is it, the beginning of the end.
***
Thinking that it will be emotionally easier for me to do it, I strip Abe’s bed of the sheets and throw them in the wash. I’m not sure what the family will want to do with his things, so I leave it all. The only thing I take from the closet is that thick navy-blue blanket that I love. The blankets weren’t his anyway.
For some reason, I can’t stop thinking about how out of breath I was after going up two flights of stairs. Maybe it’s the fact that someone just died and I’m realizing that you really don’t know when your final moment will be. This should make me want to stay with Andrew, but it doesn’t. I want to leave more than ever. I need more in my life to make me happy, and after today, I want that more than ever before.
Grabbing a sweatshirt from my closet, I throw it on, deciding that I should go for a walk. I need to start taking better care of myself. All this lack of exercise and shitty food is going to catch up to me one day. Picking my keys off the hook, I step outside, locking the d
oor behind me.
CHAPTER 11
Getting back from the walk, I feel great. I even tried jogging a few times, that didn’t work out but I give myself an A for effort. The entire time I was walking, I would tell myself that when I got back, I was going to take a bath. Here it is. Finally. I am finally going to take this bath that I have been wanting to take since we moved in, and nothing, I mean nothing, is going to stop me.
As soon as I reach the top of the stairs, I pause.
The ghost is back.
I can smell him.
As usual, I see nothing. This smell though, it does something to me. Each time that I’ve encountered it, the effects are stronger. I clench my thighs together. I may end up having a little more fun in the bath than I was originally planning.
Now, more excited to take a bath, I hurry into the bedroom. As soon as I enter, a high pitched, extremely embarrassing scream leaves my lips and I, for some reason, throw my phone at the bed. My hands immediately going to my chest, my heart beating rapidly. I take deep breaths, trying to calm myself. I find the wall behind me and lean on it, closing my eyes to help myself concentrate. I’ve never been so scared that I’ve passed out, but I feel this may be the time. When I feel that I’ve got myself together, I start to feel angry.
“What the hell are you doing?” I ask around trying to catch my breath but wanting my anger to be known.
There, sitting on the edge of my bed is the handsome asshole that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about. Looking hotter than the last time I seen him. I didn’t think that was possible, but trust me, it is. Something about the cockiness and confidence that he wears on his face. Why is that so attractive? A shit eating grin spreads across his lips, and as sexy as he looks right now, I’d love nothing more than to punch him right in the face.
“I found you.”
“Couldn’t you have found me somewhere else? Or made some noise or something? I nearly shit myself.”
“And where is the fun in that?” His grin only gets bigger. He steeples his hands together and loses the smile. “Fun time is over. Have you thought about our last conversation?”
“No.”
“No?”
“No!”
“What do you mean ‘no’?”
“Exactly like it sounds. N-O. No. I’ve recently come to the conclusion that you are a psychopath and I think you should leave.” Raising my eyebrows, I point to him and then to the door.
“What led you to that assumption?” His head cocks to the side.
“Hmmm. I don’t know. Maybe the fact that you corner me in a park and start telling me crazy stories about me being some kind of monster that can’t die. Then, you find out where I live and break in, which is illegal I should mention, you hide out in my room and scare the fucking shit out of me when all I was trying to do was come upstairs to enjoy a nice hot, relaxing bath. One that I am long overdue for, by the way!”
“Feel better?” He raises his eyebrows.
Narrowing my eyes at him, I think about it.
“A little.” I lean back into the wall and let out a long breath that I didn’t realize I’d been holding in. My heart is no longer pounding in my chest and it’s a good thing that I didn’t have to pee, because that would have been a disaster.
He stands and walks up to me, even his walk is sexy, full of confidence. He places his hands on the wall, on either side of my head. He tilts his chin down, almost bringing his forehead to mine. I feel myself slowly melting, my body completely betraying me, not even caring that this guy is a stranger. I’m supposed to be angry, not swooning. I have no control over my body when he is next to me, last time it was exciting but, in this moment, I’m seething. His shoulder length hair has a little curl to it and its tucked behind his ears, not a strand out of place. His beard is neatly trimmed and dark. It covers his face from below his cheek bones, to practically his Adam’s apple. His dark brown eyes remind me of mud. Okay, so mud doesn’t sound so stimulating but right now, it is. When it’s been raining all day, and the dirt is soaked, but then the sun comes out and shines on everything and even the mud looks beautiful. Yeah, those are his eyes. Shiny mud. He’s so close I can feel the heat radiating off him. I feel my breath changing, it slows and deepens. And his smell. He smells so…
“It’s you!” I shout, shoving him away from me. “I can’t believe it’s you. You’re the ghost that I’ve been freaking out about.”
He walks back up to me, getting closer than before. “I am no ghost, Asha. I am here, flesh and blood.” He tucks my hair behind my ear, brushing his fingers down my cheek as he goes.
I swallow. Hard. I don’t know what to say. I know what I want to say, but I can’t find the words. My brain is like mush. How does he do this to me? This guy could kill me right now and I would not care. I would do whatever it is he told me to do, without question. But wait, why didn’t I notice his smell the last time?
“Wait, why do you smell now, but you didn’t smell the other day in the park?”
“I hope when you’re using the term ‘smell’, it’s in a positive way. Most people use that negatively. To answer your question, I wasn’t wearing the smell.” His voice breathy. He cups my face in his hand, and I lean into it. He pushes closer to me, his body flush with mine, causing my heartbeat to quicken, once again. It’s getting hot in here, no, it’s just me. I forgot to turn up the temperature, yet my skin is still burning with heat. I lick my lips, looking up at him, longing for him to be the one to lick my lips. He moves his face closer; I can almost taste him. He places both hands above my head and pins me to the wall. I’m almost positive I can feel his hard cock digging into my hip, but I’m not sure because I can’t think straight. He stares and bites on his bottom lip. My eyes move to his lips, thinking about what they taste like.
He lets out a frustrated growl. A growl? He then pushes off the wall and moves to the other side of the room. He runs both hands through his hair, tucking it behind his ears again. I try to catch my breath while I have some space. I think I forget to breathe when he’s that close. What the hell was that? I don’t even know this guy. He turns to look at me and I see a glint of sorrow in those muddy brown eyes.
“I can’t believe it’s really you.” He’s looking directly into my eyes. “I have been looking for you for a very long time, and here you are. Finally, right in front of me. Just like that.”
“Yep. I’m here.” I shrug.
He shakes his head and looks at the floor.
“If only you could remember.”
“I like to think I have a pretty good memory.” He looks up at me, eyebrows furrowed. “Just sayin’.” I try not to make things awkward, but it seems the more I try, the worse it gets. I decide to shut up and let him do the talking.
“How about we go downstairs to talk?” Okay, now I’m going to shut up. I turn to the door and motion for him to follow. I walk down the stairs with him in tow. I guide us to the dining room table. “Would you like something to drink?” Eventually, I will shut up. Promise.
“Beer?”
“Sorry, just ran out. How about rum and cola?”
“That will work.”
I make our drinks and I’m sure to add double the amount of rum into mine. Something telling me that I’m going to need it. Setting the drink in front of him, I move around to the other side of the table, taking the chair directly across from where he sits. I take a long sip from the drink. Oh yeah, this will work. Moving the cup to the side, I fold my hands together and place them on the table in front of me. Looking up, my eyes meet his, raising my eyebrows because I told myself that I was done talking. He looks at me and leans back into his chair, folding his arms across his chest.
“There is so much to say. Where should I start?”
“Uhm, how about the beginning?”
“The beginning of us, or the beginning of you?”
“Uh…” I shrug my shoulders and frown.
He clears his throat. “Let me start by elaborating on what you are, since
you have no idea. It’s the most important part.” He takes a sip of his drink and places both forearms on the table. “As I mentioned the other day, you, like I, are an Immortalite. Let me make it clear, that we are not monsters, as you derogatorily stated before. We are not any more dangerous than a human. To be an Immortalite you have to have been born from them, both parents must carry the gene. It is highly unlikely that an Immortalite will be born from only one parent having the gene.”
“So, my parents?”
“Are not your parents. Not your real parents.”
I knew it!
I nod my head once; not surprised by this information. The thought has gone through my head more than once.
“Immortalites grow up with their original parents and when they hit the age of eighteen, they go through the Bonding Ceremony, as long as they have passed their courses at The Academy. This ceremony bonds your immortality to your body. Before the ceremony, the immortality lives within you but is not a part of you. Therefore, you can die like any normal human. However, after death you will be reborn into a random family. They have no knowledge of what you are. For all they know, you are their actual conceived child, even the DNA will match, because technically, you are born from them. The biggest problem is you having no knowledge of what you are. Hence, why we are here right now.”
He takes another sip from his cup. I do the same.
“Why aren’t we reborn to our own parents?’
“How would you feel if you hadn’t procreated with someone recently, and then suddenly you were pregnant? Or, your children are all about a hundred, and you no longer want anymore, but then suddenly, you are pregnant. There is no way to tell where the original parents will be in their life, it would be unfair of the universe to put that burden on someone. This way, is more reasonable.”
