by Emily Mayer
"I asked Cole and Gabe if they would give me riding lessons. I thought I could help out around here as a thank-you. You know, since I’m making extra work for them. But it turns out I’m basically useless so…"
I gestured toward the wheelbarrow, without actually moving most of my arm.
"Ben and Gabe are making you do chores for riding lessons?" Mary's eyebrows jumped up her forehead.
"No! I asked them to let me help out. I like being helpful and they were nice enough to agree to teach me. Like I said, I offered. Besides, I should know how to take care of a horse too, right? I mean, that is part of riding."
I hoped I sounded more enthusiastic and persuasive than I felt. Mary looked at me silently for a few seconds before making up her mind. I would have been so shitty in the courtroom.
"Well, it's very thoughtful of you to want to help out, but if you’re going to be doing work around here, you can't go around skipping meals. Why don't you take a little break and come to the kitchen with me? I can whip you something up. It looks like you could use a nice cool drink, too. How long have you been out here?"
"Oh, um, I don't know, what time is it?" I realized I hadn't stopped once to check the time.
"Just about three thirty."
"A long time." I tried to laugh casually, but even I could hear what a sad sound had come out of my mouth. "I think I’ll just keep working. I'm almost done anyway. Might as well just keep going. I brought plenty of water, so I’m staying hydrated."
Honestly, I was afraid if I stopped moving long enough to sit at the table and eat, I might not be able to get back up. It was safer to just keep moving. Mary made a disapproving noise in her throat.
"Okay, but I’m bringing you a sandwich. You won't be much help to anyone if you pass out. I don't want to hear any arguments, either."
"Thank you, Mary, a sandwich would be great." I smiled genuinely. She wasn’t going to get any argument out of me if she wanted to make me a sandwich. I wouldn’t say no if she offered to feed me the sandwich, either, at this point.
True to her word, Mary returned with a chicken salad sandwich on bread I was pretty sure was not store-bought. I devoured it, savoring every single bite. It was the best sandwich I had ever eaten, and I had eaten many, many sandwiches in my twenty-seven years.
Mary left with an empty plate and the promise that I wouldn't miss dinner. Hank Williams, who had perked up as soon as the sandwich appeared, followed Mary back to the house. His loyalty stopped at food. I could respect that.
13.
I finished the last couple of stalls, each one taking longer than the one before it, and dragged myself to the house. I paused to take off my shoes just outside the door, where I had seen boots lined up in messy rows before. My slow procession stopped when I reached the bottom of the staircase. I peered up. It seemed a lot longer than I remembered. I whimpered for what felt like the hundredth time today.
The staircase I had so admired the first time I saw it now seemed like an insurmountable obstacle. I took one step and then another, slowly making my way up while reminding my aching legs that there was a warm shower waiting for them at the top.
Ben chose that moment to casually walk down the stairs like it was nothing. His steps slowed as he got closer, taking in my appearance.
"What the hell happened to you?"
"Your brother’s an ass, that's what happened,” I fired back, not stopping my ascent. ‘Keep moving’ was my official mantra today.
"Jack?" His voice thick with disbelief. Why everyone had such a hard time believing that Jack could be an ass was beyond me. I grunted.
"Forget it. It's fine. I just want to take a shower. If I’m not at dinner, I’m dead and it was nice knowing you. You were a great boss."
Ben's loud laugh echoed through the empty space.
"I'd offer to help, but I’m pretty sure that would count as sexual harassment and I’m supposed to be keeping a low profile."
"Ha ha,” I deadpanned. "You are so funny. Don't forget, I control your calendar. I can make your life miserable."
Ben laughed again, holding up his hands in surrender.
"You got me. See you at dinner. I promise to send a rescue party if you’re a no-show."
I gave a wave and powered on. I wasted no time undressing once I closed my bedroom door behind me. In a move that went against everything in my nature, I left my clothes wherever they fell as I crossed the short distance to the bathroom. I wasn't big on baths, but if I’d had more time, I would have loved to sink into a tub of hot water with a glass of wine and a couple of ibuprofens. Instead, I settled for two ibuprofens with water and turned the nozzle for the shower to just shy of scalding and waited for the water to warm up.
Stepping into the hot spray, I groaned so loudly I would have been embarrassed if anyone had been around to hear me. I stood motionless, letting the heat of the water work its way into my skin, and deeper, into all those newly-discovered muscles I’d made frenemies with today. I stood there until my arms felt up to the task of washing my hair and then the rest of me. I stayed under the water until my limbs felt like jelly and my eyes were heavy.
It took so much strength to pull myself out of the shower, but I had promised Mary I wouldn't skip dinner. Pulling on my favorite pair of worn jeans and an old college sweatshirt, I piled my hair on top of my head and applied just the smallest amount of makeup, in the hopes it would make me look less tired than I felt.
I traveled down the hall and then down the stairs slowly, the effects of the shower and the ibuprofen fading the more I moved. I vaguely remembered someone telling me moving was the best thing for sore muscles. I decided that person had probably never had a sore muscle in their entire life. I could hear the buzz of conversation as I got closer to the kitchen. Sam, Ben, Gabe, and Jack were already seated around the table, each with a beer in hand. I saw Rodney's lower half sticking out of the refrigerator, and it sounded like he was still attempting to dominate the conversation despite his head being buried inside it.
Smiling my way, Gabe scooted over and patted the spot next to him. I returned his smile and made my way over, then eyeballed the bench that stood between me and sitting. I heard Gabe chuckle. Gingerly, I lifted one leg up and carefully swung it over the bench, fighting to keep the misery from showing on my face. My hand had other ideas, though, and moved to Gabe's shoulder totally of its own volition. Any other time, I would have taken a moment to appreciate the muscular shoulder my hand was gripping. Then again, any other time I wouldn’t have touched that shoulder without an invitation. The second leg followed the path of the first one, and I lowered myself to the bench like someone four times my age.
Gabe looked at me, that easy grin still in place, and winked. I was too tired to handle that dimple. It was going to fry the little bit of my brain that was still working.
"The barn looked real good, Evie. How you feeling?"
"Evie, huh? And like I got beat up by a shovel and its wheelbarrow partner in crime." I returned his grin with a tired one of my own. Gabe chuckled, shooting me a two-dimpled smile, and nudged me gently with his shoulder.
"I heard one of your girls call you that. I like it. You want me to grab you a beer? I think you earned one today."
"A beer would be great, thank you."
Mary announced that dinner was ready and the table began to clear. I decided to stay seated. It wasn't like I was going to beat anyone to the front of the line. At this point, I was considering just drinking my dinner. Beer had a lot of calories. Nutrition was overrated, anyway.
Gabe returned to the table balancing two plates and a beer. I’m sure the smile I gave him when he set the second plate and beer in front of me was ridiculous.
"Don't look at me like that. I just didn't want to have to watch you try to stand up,” Gabe said, taking a large bite of potatoes.
"Have I told you today that you are my absolute favorite cowboy?" I asked him, reaching for the cold beer and taking a long drink. I was a little in love with this man
right now.
"Uh-huh,” Gabe mumbled around his food. "I'll remember that."
I ate quietly, struggling to keep my eyes open and to keep up with all the conversations happening around me. Sam and Jack were discussing the various states of disrepair the fences were in, Gabe and Ben were talking about some sports team, and Rodney was telling Mary about a shop he found in town. I learned that Ben had taken Rodney into town to run some errands earlier. From what I heard around the table, Jack wasn’t aware that I had been the one to clean out the barn—which meant he didn't know about the deal I’d made earlier with Gabe and Cole.
"Evelyn."
The sound of my name drew me out of my thoughts.
"Sorry, what was that?" I looked up and saw everyone's eyes on me. I felt a blush start to spread across my chest and up my cheeks.
"I was saying how much you must be looking forward to having another woman around here at dinner. Mary said Cole's wife was coming up tomorrow. Nice break for you from all this testosterone, huh?" Rodney laughed at his own joke. I wasn’t sure he realized that his comment might have been slightly offensive to the other woman in the room, who at this point should have been nominated for sainthood. Raising two boys must have given her a high tolerance for stupidity.
"It's been a real struggle,” I confirmed, my sarcasm obvious to everyone but him.
I already knew Cole's wife and daughter ate dinner up here regularly. Margot had stayed home with their daughter, Letty, this week, because Letty was fighting a cold and being a "little nightmare." Cole's words, not mine.
If anyone else had made the comment, I would have admitted that I was really looking forward to meeting Margot. I already decided she had to be amazing to have snagged Cole. There was no way I was going to tell Rodney any of this, though, and risk accidentally starting a conversation with him.
"There's a band playing at Rowdy's tonight, little bar in town. I think we're all going to grab a drink and listen, if you want to come with us. Break up that testosterone?" Gabe leaned in to whisper.
"Do I want to go to a bar where there is dancing with Rodney? Nope. No thank you. I kind of just want to go to sleep, honestly. Thanks for the offer, though."
"Can't say I blame you. But we both know you'd be using all your dances on me."
He was absolutely right, although I suspected I would be fighting off every other female in the bar.
"You think so, huh? And we both know you would just be holding me up at this point. There wouldn't be any dancing happening."
"I’d take my chances. Do you think you can handle a riding lesson tomorrow morning?" One of Gabe's eyebrows slid up that handsome forehead as he asked the question, making it sound more like a challenge.
"Yep! I’ll be fine." I couldn’t help giving a little squeal. "I’m so excited!"
Gabe barked out at a laugh, obviously caught off-guard by the level of my enthusiasm.
"Okay, city girl. Take it easy." My smile turned to a scowl at the use of that nickname. "You think you can make it to the barn by six?"
"Let's stick with Evie, cowboy, and six is fine. I’ll be there!" But six was pretty early, so I followed up with an important question. "What’s your policy on drinking coffee while riding, though? Asking for a friend."
"You and your coffee." Gabe shook his head. "Sorry, no drinking and riding."
I may have mumbled something about it being more unsafe for me to operate a horse while uncaffeinated, earning another laugh from Gabe.
"You ready, Romeo, or did you change your mind about going?" Jack's abrupt question made my head snap in his direction, and this time I didn’t manage to hide the grimace the sudden movement caused.
"Worried about the competition, old man?" Gabe fired back easily, clearly unfazed by what I was pretty sure was an insult.
"Nah, just thought I'd give you a chance to bow out gracefully,” Jack teased back, a small grin appearing.
I wasn't sure what this back-and-forth was actually about, but I was fairly confident that it involved women—confident enough to roll my eyes in their general direction. Men are boys forever. Ben felt the need to prove that point.
"Hey now, I think you both forgot I was in town. God knows the poor women at Rowdy's need a break from your faces."
Gross, gross, gross. And that was my cue to jump into this idiot-fest.
"You keep your hands to yourself. You are officially out of the running for whatever contest this is,” I said, pointing to Ben and wagging my finger. Turning to Gabe, I said, "Make sure he doesn't do anything that's going to require antibiotics later."
The last part earned a strangled laugh from Gabe, and even a chuckle from Ben—who didn’t look the least bit embarrassed, despite the fact that his mother was seated at the table.
"Yes ma'am,” Gabe obliged.
Gabe's agreement seemed to be a sign that it was time for them to head out. Dishes were dropped into the sink, thank-yous and goodbyes given to Mary, and hats grabbed off the rack by the door. I was promptly told to go to my room and rest by Mary when I tried to help her clean the kitchen. I didn’t put up much of a fight—just enough for Midwestern politeness. Hank Williams followed closely behind me as if even he was aware that, once I crawled into bed, I was not getting up again.
Sliding under the cover, I sighed with relief. Everything they said about physical labor was true. I looked longingly at my Kindle but decided I didn't even have the energy to read. I reached to turn the lamp off.
My phone's loud ring stopped me mid-reach. Picking it up off the nightstand, I saw "mom" on the screen. I waged a brief internal battle between the desire to sleep and being a good daughter.
"Hi mom," I greeted her after hitting the answer button. Being a good daughter had won.
"Hi, Evie. I hope I'm not calling too late. I keep getting the time difference messed up." I heard a muffled “Okay, give me a minute,” and then, "Your dad says hi and he loves you."
"Tell him I love him too, and I was still up, so no worries."
"You sound tired, sweetie. Did you have a migraine?" Concern edged her question.
"No, I just spent the day mucking out stalls and I’m exhausted. I hadn’t realized there were so many horses on this ranch."
"Why were you mucking out stalls, Evelyn?" she half-asked, half-demanded, in the way only mothers can manage.
"It's kind of a long story, actually. " But even I knew how pathetically evasive that response sounded. Mom was not having it.
"Well, then, I guess it’s a good thing I’m retired." She waited silently on the other end. I knew there was no way she was going to drop it. She was a master in the art of waiting you out. My mom could wield silence better than a mime.
I couldn't exactly put my finger on why, but telling my mom about King and Jack felt like poking a raw wound. I didn't know why so many emotions were wrapped up in those two. But I took a deep breath, petting Hank Williams for comfort, and told her about King and wanting to help him. Then I told her about Jack and how cold he had been since I got here, and what he had said to me when I asked to help. Finally, I told her about the deal I’d struck with Cole and Gabe and how they had been nothing but nice to me—the opposite of Jack in every way.
"I don't know, Mom. I just feel like I have to help King. I can't really explain it, I guess. It just feels important. Is that crazy? It is right?"
My mom made a thoughtful noise in her throat. Silence stretched across the phone. There were times when I loved how thoughtful my mom always was and there were times when it made me want to scream. This was one of the latter.
"I think it makes perfect sense, actually. You were always trying to bring home hurt or stray animals when you were little, so I can't say I’m all that surprised. Do you remember the time you brought home those rabbits you found in the backyard because you were worried they’d freeze to death?"
"Yes! How could I ever forget those rabbits? And all the babies they had in my closet."
I snickered, remembering the look on Mom's
face when she opened my closet door and a whole herd of bunnies came hopping out. How I had managed to keep their existence a secret for so long was one of the greatest unexplained mysteries in Mercer family history. The bunny family was promptly packed up and delivered to a rabbit sanctuary. Yes, there is such a thing as a bunny sanctuary, and yes, it is as adorable as it sounds.
"Do you think my plan will convince Jack, though? I feel like I’ve thought of everything that could go wrong, but I don't know. It’s hard to make a plan to change his mind when I don't even know why he dislikes me so much in the first place. And I really think the reason he doesn't want me to help is because he doesn't like me."
Mom sighed. She was one of those magical creatures: a mother who never seemed to raise her voice. Even with three teenage girls, I could rarely remember my mom yelling, unless it was to be heard over our screaming. However, that didn’t mean she never called us out on our nonsense. I could always count on her to tell me I was being stubborn or ridiculous—which always felt slightly harder to hear when it was said quietly. Quiet is always so much more reasonable-sounding than shouting.
After a few more seconds of silence, she said, in that patient voice that was such a large part of the soundtrack of my childhood, "Evie, you can't plan people, sweetie. I know you need everything to fit into a neat little plan, but people don't work like that. I don’t know if Jack will feel any differently once you prove you’re at least capable of not getting hurt, but I think it's worth trying."
"Ugh. I just wish I knew why he hates me so much. I get along fine with everyone else here—well, except Rodney, but that's because of Rodney. I can't think of anything I could have done or said."
