by Quinn Loftis
"She's asking why the hell you're quoting Harry Potter…again?" Decebel was getting more and more confused by the conversation the two girls were having--through his thoughts.
"Man, this would be easier if she had a cell phone," Sally grumbled.
Decebel looked at Jacque. "Let me try and explain, okay?"
"Go for it, lover boy."
"Jen, I was hit with a curse by a witch. According to Sally it affected my memory. There are huge holes – I can't remember so much... I'm really struggling with this because I feel like there are some things that I should not have been able to forget."
Jen didn’t respond right away. If he hadn't felt her in his mind he would have thought she was gone.
"You for-forgot me? You really don't know who I am." A statement. Her voice was so full of hurt that Decebel felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest. "So you feel like you shouldn't have been able to forget your true mate?"
"Yes," Decebel answered honestly.
Jen didn't respond.
"I think I hurt her," Decebel confessed out loud.
"Of course you hurt her, you oaf, " Jacque growled. "Now that the cat is out of the bag, ask her where she is, if she's okay, and how we find her." Jacque was nearly on her feet. Only Fane's hand on her leg kept her from jumping up and pacing.
"Where are you?"
Soon Decebel cringed and looked back at Jacque. "Does she always talk so, so..." He growled as he tried to come up with the word.
"So sailor-like? Get used to it, Don Juan. Whatever she said, I promise you she has said worse," Jacque snapped.
"It just gets worse when she's stressed," Sally tried to reassure him.
"She's asking, 'What the hell does is matter where I am if my damn hairy, flea-infested mate doesn't know me from the next hot blonde on the street?"
"You left out some words, didn't you?" Jacque raised a single eyebrow at Decebel. "'Cause that's pretty mild for Jen."
Decebel snarled. "There's no reason to repeat everything she says. And why does she think I have fleas?"
"She thinks everything with fur has fleas. Don’t take it personally." Jacque's tone was sharp, but she knew she shouldn't be taking her frustration out on Decebel.
"Luna, ease up on him." Fane gentled his words by rubbing Jacquelyn's back. She looked over at him and stuck her tongue out.
"I intend to take you up on that offer later."
"I've created a monster," Jacque told him, rolling her eyes.
"Oh, you have no idea, my love." Fane's smile spoke of wicked things.
Finally Jacque turned her attention back to Decebel, who was looking more and more concerned by the minute.
"Now she isn't responding to me," he told them as his brows drew together and his shoulders grew tense. It was obvious he was trying very hard to hold it together. It was then that Jacque realized that even though Decebel had lost some of his memory, he was still the same man. A possessive, bossy, controlling, dominant wolf. She imagined that the idea of not being able to fix this situation, of not being able to comfort Jen, was driving him crazy.
"Jen, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." Decebel tried to make sure she could feel the frustration and worry he was feeling.
Finally she responded. "Please stop calling me Jen. Call me anything but Jen. I just can't stand hearing your voice saying it."
Decebel looked at Sally. Sally winced at the pain she saw pooling in his amber eyes.
"She told me to quit calling her Jen; to call her anything but Jen."
"Just because you don't remember does not mean she isn't your mate, Decebel." It was Cynthia who spoke this time. "Do you feel anything when you hear her voice?"
"My wolf stirs at the sound. She brings him peace."
"Try to imagine how she is feeling," Cynthia told him. "She's just found out that the man she loves, the man who has done nothing but protect her, pursue her, and make her feel like the most cherished woman on earth, doesn't remember her. Give her this simple thing. Call her Jennifer."
Decebel tried to reach out to Jennifer again, but she pulled back. It was like a punch to his gut.
"I just need some time, Decebel. Please. Just -" He felt her pain, could nearly feel the tears that streaked her face. "I just need some time." And then she was gone.
Sally, Jacque, Fane, Costin, Cynthia, and Crina all watched in shock as Decebel, big, strong, immovable Decebel, lost control.
Decebel shot up from the ground and with wolf speed was across the room, grabbing chairs and throwing them. They shattered, hitting the walls with such force that the tavern shook. Decebel snarled, continuing to wreak havoc on everything in his path. His howl of pain swept through the building, bringing everyone to their knees as power rolled off of him.
Suddenly the door to the room flew open and Vasile stormed in. His own power filled the room, wrapping around Decebel and pulling him down.
"Settle, Beta." Vasile words were firm, laced with the promise of retribution if his Beta did not get himself under control.
Decebel bowed his head.
"I've failed her. I don't remember her, but even as I stand here I can feel my wolf snarling at me. My own wolf reprimanding me for not taking care of her."
"Are you telling me your wolf remembers her?" Vasile asked.
"I don't know if he remembers her as our mate but he feels a connection to her, wants to protect her." Decebel looked around the room, shame filling him at the evidence of his loss of control. "I will fix this, Alpha," he told Vasile.
"Yes, you will. You can't help her if you can't keep yourself under control."
Decebel nodded but didn't say anything more.
"We will help him," Sally offered.
Costin looked over at her and she blushed at the approval shining in his eyes.
"That isn't necessary," Decebel told her.
"I didn't ask for your permission. We are pack. What's the point of being pack if we don't share each other's burdens?"
"Well said, healer." Vasile smiled at Sally and he could tell she was going to be a very special addition to his pack.
It had taken the rest of the day for Decebel and the others to get the room cleaned and salvage as many chairs as they could. He'd met with the owner and told him he would pay for the damage and buy all new chairs. Thankfully Nicolae was very understanding and took things in stride.
That evening, Decebel looked out of the second story window of the quiet room where he sat. Light from the lanterns flickered, casting eerie shadows across the walls; a fire burned behind him in one of the many fireplaces that occupied the tavern. His back was warm from the heat, but the cold that ran across his face and chest remained. There were beds lining the walls, side by side across both sides of the room. Later he would share this room with the others from his pack, but for now he had told everyone that he needed to be alone. He needed to see if he could get Jennifer to speak to him. He was worried about her, about how she had sounded the last time they had spoken through the intimate bond they shared.
Decebel pulled his phone out when he felt it vibrate. Vasile had sent him a text asking if he was alright. Decebel smiled, amazed at how much Vasile cared for his wolves. Decebel responded and started to put the phone away before noticing a past text from Jennifer. His heartbeat increased as he opened up the text message and his breath caught as he read their playful correspondence.
When he scrolled through it, certain things grabbed his attention. He called her baby, told her she was his. He'd even told her to keep her clothes on. He would have to ask Jacque and Sally about that one. They teased each other and it was evident that there was an easy intimacy between them. His heart began to ache as he read the texts over and over. Before Cosmina's death he had longed for a mate, longed for what he had obviously had with Jennifer. He remembered that after Cosmina had died he had sworn he would never take a mate. Never again had he wanted the responsibility for one's life, or the possibility that he might fail again. Now, reading these texts, he knew
he would do anything to gain his memories back. He would do anything to have this woman who obviously loved him, and he her, back in his arms.
"I found the text messages between us." Decebel pushed his thoughts as hard as he could against her shields. He felt bad forcing his way into her mind, but not bad enough not to do it. He felt empty, alone without her presence in his mind.
"Jennifer, please talk to me," Decebel pleaded.
"And what exactly would you have me say? Hey there, I know you don’t remember me but I love you more than life itself and can't stand being without you. I can barely breath from being away from you. I'm hurting and scared and pissed. Is that what you want to hear? Do you want to hear how my heart is breaking and my soul feels like it's been ripped in two? Or maybe you'd like me to tell you how all I can think about is the last time you held me in your arms, the last kiss you gave me, the last time I heard you speak to me with recognition. What should I say, Decebel?"
Decebel closed his eyes as he soaked up her pain.
"I know I've hurt you and I'm sorry. I can tell from these text that I loved you,"
Jennifer interrupted him before he could say more, and the catch in her voice nearly brought him to his knees, "Loved – past tense. Wow, that is rich. That's the icing on the proverbial cake, fur ball. Thank you for that."
"JENNIFER STOP!" Decebel roared through their bond. "I'm not giving up on us. I'm not going to stop until I find you and until the curse is destroyed. No, I don’t remember you, but everyone tells me you are precious to me. Something in me tells me they are right. I will find you, but until then... just let me court you all over again."
"Um, news flash, Dec. You never really courted me in the first place. You pretty much told me I was yours and nearly killed any other who breathed too close to me." He could hear her sarcasm and took that as a good sign, like maybe he had gotten through to her.
"And how exactly to you plan to court me, B?" she asked him
"B?"
"For Beta. Although I reserve the right to use it to call you a female dog when I deem it necessary."
Decebel grinned. She was a feisty one, that was for sure.
"Well, I've got all night. How about we get to know one another again?"
He waited to see what she would say and didn't even realize he was holding his breath until he released it when she responded.
"Okay."
"Before we go any further, I need to know, are you safe? Is anyone hurting you?"
"I'm safe. I'm hurting, but only because I fell into a deep hole in the ground."
Decebel decided to wait to address that. First he would deal with her emotions and help put her at ease.
Chapter 8
"I'll start." Jen began. "And I've been meaning to ask you this for a while, but things got a little hectic recently and before that you were being a butt head. What's your last name and how come you never use it?" Jen closed her eyes as she lay on the table. She had been wondering what his last name was, that was true, but right this moment she would listen to him recite the alphabet over and over just to hear his voice. Yes, yes, I am that pathetic at this moment, she thought.
"My last name is Anghelescu. It simply means son of Anghel. Anghel was my father."
"Who was your father?" Jen asked.
She almost could hear him take a deep breath before he spoke.
"He was the Alpha of the Western Romanian pack." Decebel waited for her response. He figured she probably didn't know that at one time the Romanian pack was divided.
"When was your father Alpha?"
Decebel's brow furrowed. Wasn't she going to ask him about the pack being divided?
"After the werewolf wars. The previous Alpha was killed during them. I think his name was -"
"Gavril," Jen finished for him.
Decebel couldn't believe she knew this. It wasn't something that was ever talked about in casual conversation. How could she know?
"Yes, Gavril. My father was his Beta.” Decebel paused uncomfortably.“...My father died in 1905 after my mother, Eveline, was shot and killed by poachers. They'd mistaken her for a wild wolf. I was only 20 human years old, making me one of the youngest Alphas in our history."
This time he did feel her surprise. So she hadn't known that he had been an Alpha.
"You were an Alpha?" Jen knew the awe she felt filled her voice.
"Yes."
"So what happened? Why are you not one anymore?" Decebel could feel her interest, her desire to know more about him. For some reason that made him feel proud. His wolf was strutting, like a young pup trying to catch a female's attention.
"When my sister Cosmina died I lost it. I went into a fit of rage that became dangerous to all those around me. I remember Vasile coming to me, I remember dissolving the Western Romanian Pack and declaring a merge, but after that I don't remember what happened. I do know gave up my last name. I had disgraced my family by not protecting my sister – I didn't deserve to carry my father's name."
Jen could feel Decebel's pain at losing his sister, and the shame he thought he should carry. But she knew better. Even Alphas couldn't save everyone.
"Decebel, Alphas aren't infallible. You should not be ashamed of what happened that day. No one could've predicted what some idiot wolf would do. You are an amazing man, and when you claim someone as yours you do everything in your power to protect them. But you aren't perfect and no one expects you to be."
"You speak as if you know me." Decebel couldn't hide the emotion that her words evoked in him.
"I do know you." Jen's voice was soft as she responded to the emotion she felt coming through their bond.
"I wish I knew you that well."
"You will," Jen promised. "I won't give you up, Decebel. Sorry, but you are stuck with me."
She could feel Decebel's joy.
"Sally showed me pictures of you on her phone," he mentioned suddenly.
Jen stilled at his comment. Her eyes flew open and met the ceiling she laid beneath, tracing along the wood beams that ran horizontally across the room. Her breathing increased and right then and there she planned to kill Sally as soon as she saw her.
"Did she now?" Jen asked carefully. "And what did you think?"
"I hoped that one day you would be bonded to me so the sheet was no longer necessary."
Jen felt blood rush to her face, the heat of embarrassment washing over her. Yep, Sally was a dead gypsy healer.
"Don't be embarrassed, Jennifer. I think you are beautiful."
"Yes, well, I didn't exactly expect the first thing shown to my mate who doesn't remember me to be me in a sheet."
"I'm not complaining." She heard laughter in his voice and she soaked it up as if it were the last drop of water she would ever feel on her skin.
"I'm sure you're not."
Decebel grew serious. "Jennifer, how did you know who Gavril was?"
Jen didn't know how much she was allowed to tell Decebel. Rachel and Gavril had stepped out, not concerned about her leaving since she couldn't walk. But how could she keep anything from Decebel? Whether he remembered her or not he was still her mate.
"Jennifer?" His voice sounded more and more like the Decebel who loved her.
"I don't want to put the ones who have rescued me in danger."
"I understand that and you can trust me. How did you know?"
Jen took a deep breath and let it out. She decided there was no way she couldn't tell him.
"I knew who he was because he and his mate Rachel are the ones who saved me from the cavern I was in. I'm in their home right now."
Jen winced at the alarm that rushed through their bond.
"How? How can they still be alive? No one has seen or heard from them in centuries."
"I know. Rachel explained everything to me."
"Then explain it to me," Decebel demanded.
"I can't yet, Dec. I don't know what they are comfortable with me telling."
"I’m your mate. How can you keep anything from m
e?"
"Oh, now you want to claim the mate card? Well you can just cram that back into your back pocket, buddy, because not long ago you were like, 'blah, blah, I don't remember you, blah, blah I should remember my mate'. So loddy freaking da!” Jen growled at him.
"I may not remember, but I do believe that you are my mate. Jennifer, you will submit to me in this." Jen could feel the shock that filled him when she laughed at him through their bond. "Are you laughing at me?"
"Yes, my furry mate, I am most definitely laughing at you. 'Submit' – man that is classic Decebel. Makes me want to kiss you."
Jen heard the door begin to creak open.
"Hey, Dec, I gotta go. They're back and I need to talk to them."
"Don't you dare block me out, Jennifer." Jen loved the bossiness in his voice; it made her feel like nothing had changed between them.
"Sorry, but the connection is kind of getting fuzzy, Dec, you're cutting in and out. May some...can't...got to...talk...late..." Jen broke her words up with silence in between to mimic a bad connection on a cell phone, then quickly slammed a wall up between their minds. It hurt to be separated from him, but Jen trusted Rachel and Gavril, and she needed to know what to do about letting her friends and mate know about her rescuers.
"How are you feeling?" Jen heard Rachel ask.
Jennifer laid on the bed with her eyes closed, smelling the cool, crisp air that had swirled in when Gavril and Rachel entered their home. While they had been gone Jen had tried to get a look around the room. She'd observed that the bed she occupied was in the area where a breakfast table would be. The kitchen was right next to it. The floors were wood and the island in the middle of the kitchen was wood with shelves all along the base of it that housed all sorts of different bottles with names written across their labels. Above the island hung a round wrought iron pot holder, but instead of pots, plants and herbs hung from it. The counter that ran on either side of the kitchen was the same wood as the island and the cabinets about it were open with no doors on them. It was a very cozy room. The smell of burning incense permeated the air and the crackle of the warm fire that she couldn't see around the corner warmed her.
