by John Jakes
"Swinnia—"
"Yes, my lady?"
"Fetch more wine. Then leave us a while. We have nothing better to do—we've only been slumbering in utter boredom."
Swinnia was on the point of retorting. But since her mistress spoke with the calm arrogance of nobility, she didn't. She waddled into the shadows, emerging after a moment with another jar. She set it on the taboret with such force that I thought it would certainly shatter.
No, I would be the one to shatter, her eyes promised me, just before her size twelve slippers bore her away into the gloom.
"Here, sit near us, Vintner."
Voluptua plumped up cushions and sank down languorously. I had seen her before, of course, at various public ceremonial functions. In close-up, she was even more sensual and seductive.
She located a glass behind the taboret, and began to preen, saying:
"Hoptor—Hoptor—Hoptor the Vintner. It seems I recall you had an audience at court. You're to be executed, or something like that."
"Think nothing of it, my lady. I'm certainly not worrying!"
"Very well, if you say so. La! Life is so full of quirks!"
And she poured a jot of wine for herself, completely forgetting to offer me any.
I, however, was more than willing to overlook impoliteness, in order to accomplish my mission.
"My lady, you already know something of my purpose—"
"Yes—" She ran a painted hand down one thinly-clad limb. "And we haven't had our personal pleasure increased in just ages. What a thoughtful citizen you are, Hoptor, to concern yourself with the welfare of your queen."
"Fair Atlantis above all, my lady! Though I hope I will be forgiven for saying it, certainly it's no secret that His Exaltedness, the king, is so occupied with weighty matters of statecraft that he often leaves the most luxurious flower in his garden untended."
"And when he does pay us a visit every few months, he does nothing but sleep all night, rattling those ivory teeth between whistles and snores!"
"Heavy are the burdens of kingship!" I intoned.
"Heavier still the burdens of being young—eager for personal pleasure's increase."
And she looked at me in such a smoky way that I very nearly fled from the chamber.
Of course I soon overcame such petty scrupling. Who is one human being to deny another satisfaction of his or her appetites? Especially when my life is at stake?
Voluptua gripped my hand. "Tell me, Vintner. Who is the hot-blooded stallion seeking entrance to these perfumed meadows?"
"Well, Your Exaltedness, to be perfectly frank, he isn't exactly seeking entrance yet. Rather, I think it need go the other way round. You must invite him. Considering your heaven-sent charms, I believe he will be instantly won."
"We do not ask lovers to come to us!"
"Yes, but this fellow's a huge, handsome rogue from northern Chimeria. He's unfamiliar with our courtly ways. He also has thews this big around."
"How big?" she exclaimed.
"This big," I said, increasing the space between my hands considerably. "The gentleman—Conax by name—being a stranger to fair Atlantis—would never think to force himself into your presence. This despite the fact he's a king in his own land."
"Chimeria, you say? I seem to recall some mention of a chap from there breaking furniture—"
"The very same chap!"
"Oh! They told me his thews were indeed immense!"
"Magnificent!" I replied, increasing the width between my hands even more. "And since he is a king, it would not demean your high station to issue the invitation. It would be a meeting of equals, so to speak."
Then—cleverly, I must admit!—I managed to feign an air of diffidence. Rising and bowing, I continued:
"However, it was merely a thought, Exaltedness. A token offered in respect for your skills in queencraft. For Hoptor is a loyal citizen if nothing else! Now, having done his deed, your humble servant begs to conclude the interview."
She nibbled at her moist lower lip, then searched me with another sultry gaze.
"We suppose there would be no harm in inviting this Conax to our chambers—"
"None at all! If you don't like what you see—that is, the choice is entirely yours. Accept him or reject him—after you see him. He's currently charged with some minor misdemeanor in connection with that broken furniture—" A wave. "But a word from you will surely open his cell."
"And do you have some sort of vested interest in all this, Hoptor?"
"Only the satisfaction of performing my patriotic duty. Oh, yes, there is the small sum of zebs Conax has paid me. I serve as his official tutor and adviser on civilized manners and customs. But that's only a means to while away the hours in my cell."
Another stretch, and her verdict:
"We thank you, Hoptor the Vintner. We shall certainly entertain your suggestion most seriously. Perhaps tomorrow evening—"
I blurted, "What's wrong with tonight?"
"What's that?"
"Forgive our persistence, but there's a storm brewing outside. This is an ideal night for remaining indoors with—leisurely pursuits."
A peal of thunder reinforced the idea most opportunely. The lustful minx was quick to decide.
"A point well taken. His Exaltedness always stays safely under the covers during inclement weather. The dampness makes his bones ache. We would not be disturbed. Very well, we shall issue an invitation to this Chimerical prince tonight! And bless you, Hoptor—you are a thoughtful, high-minded citizen!"
Admiring herself in the glass, she disappeared into the shadows.
Corrupt persons can think only of themselves, I decided, retreating swiftly from the chamber in order to avoid further intercourse with Swinnia. I only hoped that the succeeding stages of my plan would not go awry, for I was sure the wicked queen would be taken with Conax; he was not unhandsome, in a rough-edged sort of way.
And if love blossomed this night, I might present myself—Aphrodisia and Babylos, too—as members of the new favorite's retinue. Save one, save all, that was my theory.
A thin hope, you might conclude. But I had none fatter. And time was running out.
In order to light my way on the stairs, I begged a torch from one of the eunuchs. I was informed that guards awaited in the courtyard to escort me back to my cell.
The wind howled through the slot windows. Lightning crackled frequently. As thunder boomed, a sudden gust extinguished my torch.
I stumbled on, bumping against someone—a shadow-shape.
"All pardon," I said, not knowing whether I had encountered lord or lackey. "Please excuse my clumsiness—"
As I made to go around lightning fumed yet again. My eyes flew wide at the sight of the head rising from a mufti cowl.
With a shriek, I fled on down toward the courtyard.
Now indeed I knew that Babylos spoke truth, and that terrible, not to say supernatural, punishment would soon be visited on Atlantis.
The horrific reason remained burned in my memory. Above the cowl, I had glimpsed immense, elongated eyes seated in an angular face of purest, brightest blue.
A strange, foreign, phantasmagorical face—nothing of this world!
Yet I had touched the shadow-shape's solid reality—
I burst into the courtyard as the storm broke, eager for the protection of the soldiers, and rueing the day I'd sold my first vintage. Why hadn't I listened to Mother, who had wanted me to take up a respectable profession?
* Seven *
"Next to dispatching demons to the pits of perdition, my favorite sport is bouncing buxom, bumptious wenches—provided, of course, there's no permanent liaison involved. For once, hog-stomach, you have apparently done something right."
With this statement, Conax the Chimerical agreed to answer the summons of Lady Voluptua.
I had already reminded him that, per my earlier discussion, I had arranged matters so that we might win reprieve from the headsman. I also pointed out that he now bore the responsib
ility of capitalizing upon my gains.
Whereupon, he rose in my estimation—not far, mind you!—by readily accepting the duty, via the comment previously quoted.
Babylos and Aphrodisia begged to know what plot I was hatching, but I still said nothing to either of them. I was not anxious to subject myself to ridicule should the scheme misfire and we end up on the block after all.
I positioned myself next to the bars. As the rest of the cell row fell into silence, I nervously counted the tickings of time, awaiting the thump of booted feet on the stair.
An hour passed. Then another. I began to despair.
All at once, tramp-tramp, a squad of plug-uglies appeared, rain-sodden and out of sorts. Their leader ordered Conax unloosed.
"And I also," I said, insinuating myself into the cell doorway.
Snapped the soldier in charge, "We have no orders concerning you."
"But I'm his tutor! He goes nowhere without me, fearing to inadvertently break some local rule and offend the Atlantean gods. Isn't that right, O mightly monarch of Chimeria?" I gigged Conax in the ribs.
"Oh, yes, right," he responded with a witless grin. "I go no place without this fat—uh, my tutor."
Thus, we marched.
Upstairs again; then across the courtyard in the downpour. The weeping sky reminded me of the apparition I had glimpsed earlier. Through effort, I had managed to put it from my mind, for intervals as long as two or three minutes. Now, however, I felt another shudder course along my spine, and I pondered the conundrum of the origin of that blue horror which had gazed at me in the lightning's flare.
I had never given much credence to the notion of gods and goddesses, though naturally I made obeisance, just in case. But now I wondered whether the blue manifestation could be some deity made finite.
Yet why would a god or goddess descend to Atlantis in a guise certain to terrify the inhabitants because of its very strangeness? I could in no wise begin to unravel the eerie mystery.
A dash of rain in my face helped take my mind off the subject. The high winds, furious thunderclaps, and other disturbances which heralded the arrival of a storm had since passed on, leaving only steady rain. Damp, I once more climbed that winding, windy stair—full of nothing more than shadows now, thanks be!
I got as far as the chamber in which I had spoken with Voluptua. Conax was passed on to dim inner quarters. But I was barred by my several-hundred-pound nemesis.
"No partisans of Graek love wanted in there!" Swinnia advised.
"But, my lady, I must attend him! I am his tutor in local ways. Should he start to commit a gross error, I would advise him before he incurred the queen's displeasure."
"Not without getting past me, you won't advise him."
"Please, dear Swinnia! Admit me and I'll make it up to you some way, I—"
Inspiration!
"—I promise to call upon you privately, at a time that is mutually convenient.'
"What for?"
"To beg your assistance!"
"I'll arrange no midnight meetings with eunuchs!"
"Swinnia, you misunderstand! I am not happy in my state. You could help me regain my rightful role as a male. I believe your charms could at last rouse my indifference—"
"Oh, you're just trying to wheedle me."
I was, but I denied it.
"I'm sick of the netherworld of eunuchs and dandies who must creep out by night on matters illicit. Restore me, O bounteous lady! Restore me to the enjoyment of embraces of the opposite sex!"
"Well," she said at length, "I might be able to help you. I do know many of the techniques of the courtesans—"
And once more I realized that Hoptor had read his opposition aright. In fact, the stout lady was breathing quite rapidly. The thought of a gentleman—any kind of gentleman, no matter what his persuasion—frenzied her to a fever pitch. Breathing in a labored way, she propelled me toward a doorway.
"Dart in—quickly, before Her Exaltedness arrives. Position yourself behind the first of the two lacquered screens. Heed me, now—the first screen, on your right hand. The one on the left is for another purpose. Be quiet as a grave robber, and when and if Lady Voluptua and your handsome friend retire, we shall go immediately to my rooms. I'll see what I can do about rescuing you from your condition."
Pushing through the hangings, I discovered a chamber even larger and more luxurious than the first. It lacked one wall, however, the open space giving onto a large terrace. Undoubtedly the queen took the air out there in better weather. At the moment, nothing much could be seen save sheets of rain cascading from the eaves above.
Despite being open on one side, the room was not cold. On the contrary, it was stupefyingly hot, thanks to a row of braziers set along the terrace opening.
Upon seeing me, Conax—the very picture of barbaric splendor in his many-pelted cape and pieces of body-jewelry—started to blurt out some remark. A finger at my lips cautioned him to silence.
Quickly, I slipped behind the nearest lacquered screen, noting an identical one on the room's far side.
A gong rang, rather tinnily. Lady Voluptua appeared at an inner portal.
The queen was garbed as I had seen her last. But she had applied fresh eye-black, and her perfume would have staggered a statue. She slinked—that is the only proper term for it—to the center of the room, barely able to keep her eyes off her guest's bulging biceps.
Conax glanced worriedly in my direction. I put my lips to one of the screen's scrolled cutouts and started to whisper, "Abase yourself—!"
But Lady Voluptua forestalled this bit of protocol.
"You needn't kneel, since you are reportedly a king in your own right. And let's not waste time on other formalities."
She linked her arm with his, dimpling in a way I found scandalous for one of supposedly so exalted a station.
"Our bed chamber lies beyond those curtains. It's ever so much nicer for a get-acquainted chat—"
Knowing precisely what sort of chat she had in mind—had I not coached the Chimerical one to the best of my ability?—Conax rippled his thews, thereby shrugging off her clinging touch.
"What, acting the coy rogue with us?" Lady Voluptua said. I feared the game was over before it had begun.
But my tiresome repetition of the same statements—I had spoken them as many as three and four times each to Conax, without variation!—now yielded a harvest.
"Coy? No, Crok attest—never with a wench so sensuously seductive as yourself. However, you have got to remember that I have other things on my mind which may distract me, and affect my performance of—uh, performance," he concluded, with another helpless glance at the screen. Perhaps he was at home with buxom, bumptious wenches, but the presence of a hot-eyed royal temptress seemed to confound him.
"Pardon!" I hissed through the screen.
"Pardon?" he repeated.
"What did you do?" Lady Voluptua wanted to know. Then, switching her hips, she teased his chin with one finger. "La! So far, nothing."
"Oh, by Crok, I see—pardon!"
Voluptua stamped a jeweled slipper. "Are you repeating that stupid word merely to be vexatious? If you have something on your mind that is going to interfere with our get-acquainted chat, we wish you'd get it off your not inconsiderable chest."
It took Conax a moment to unwind the meaning of that statement. But, mercifully, he did.
"My lady, it is simply that being here with you—such a dazzling, delicious damsel—is pleasure partially dimmed because I'm scheduled to have my head cut off. As the rightful ruler of Chimeria, I'm damned mad about it, too. When my reavers—oh." He was recalling my stiff warning about threats, no doubt.
"So you're another one due for execution? Like your friend the tutor?"
"That's right. Personally, I can't see that my crime was all that great. I did nothing but break a few pieces of furniture, which in Chimeria is regarded as a sign of a mature, warlike temperament. Of course, I can't properly judge the crimes of those others—especia
lly that overweight so-called wine seller—"
Oh, the impudent, scheming lout! Conax had proved himself more wily than I suspected. It made no difference that, in his position, I would have behaved in precisely the same way.
From my vantage point behind the screen, however, I was furious.
"—But I don't see why, as one member of royalty to another, you can't agree to speak to that old—ah, your husband, and inquire about having my sentence set aside."
"Conax," I whispered. "Conax, you traitor—!"
"Is someone calling your name from without?" Lady Voluptua asked.
The Chimerical one had heard me clearly. I thought I detected a flush of shame on his cheeks. As well I should! He said:
"Uh, naturally, if you can also encourage the king to pardon Hoptor and the others who share my cell, I'm sure they would be grateful. But here on the verge of what promises to be a fine get-acquainted chat, I just can't bring myself to fully chatting trim unless I have at least your verbal assurance that you'll do what you can."
"In other words, your performance is contingent upon peace of mind?"
"By Crok, yes. Single-minded, that's the sort of king I am."
Manipulating his thews with her perfumed hands, Lady Voluptua breathed, "Yes, yes, all right, we shall discuss the matter—"
"With the king?"
"With the king, with the king! But in the morning. If we continue this endless talk about your fate, it will be morning."
"Very well," Conax returned. "Since I have your assurance, I am now ready to get acquainted."
And he allowed himself to be led straight toward a veiled doorway.
Just then, with everything finally going well, there was another abrupt reversal.
From directly above the terrace beyond the braziers, a blinding light shone down. For a heartbeat I fully expected to hear thunder. But there was no sound save for the outcry of a eunuch on guard somewhere outdoors. He scampered to the center of the terrace and pointed upward into the light's heart. All at once he threw away his spear, rushed to the parapet, jumped up and hurled himself into oblivion.
In a trice, the terrifying sight he'd seen began to reveal itself to those of us inside.
Lady Voluptua cried for her guards. Several rushed in. But after one glance at the source of the unearthly radiance, they rushed right out again.
